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My Sister Has Savings and I Have Two Jobs, So Why Am I Buying Her Diapers?

by Daniel Garcia
February 4, 2026
in Social Issues

Hey there, lovely readers. Have you ever felt like you were giving every last bit of your energy and resources to someone you love, only to realize the favor would never be returned? It is a heavy feeling that many of us know all too well. We often call it family loyalty, but sometimes, it starts to look a lot like a one-way street.

A young woman recently shared a very personal story that really makes you stop and think about where kindness ends and taking advantage begins. Living in a small apartment and working two jobs just to keep her head above water, she was supporting her wealthy sister’s newborn without a second thought. However, a peek behind the curtain revealed a situation that was far from fair.

Let us explore how she found the strength to protect her own peace.

My Sister Has Savings and I Have Two Jobs, So Why Am I Buying Her Diapers?
Not the actual photo

The Story

AITA for not wanting to help pay for my sisters baby anymore?

My sister had a baby, I was super happy for her obviously, and a couple weeks after baby was born she comes to me asking if I can help

pay for the babies stuff (Food, diapers, hygiene products) and obv she just had a baby & she’s my sister so I help her no questions asked.

A detail i can’t leave out is that My sister(26) is wealthy. Not like a millionaire But she has a lot of money to spend and

a lot of money saved. I(24), am poor, not homeless, but Most goes to bills, rent, I’m living in a trashy apartment, two jobs, you get it.

So I’m buying her whatever she needs for the kid, when she needs more I get more, even taking care of her kid whenever she or her

husband can’t, and I really didn’t have a problem with it. That was until a family get together, and she’s showing off her babies expensive room

(canopy crib, decked out in decorations and toys all that stuff) and once again, didn’t pay much attention to it. Unfortunately I got a little

alcohol in my system and asked about it. “ Hey why am I paying for baby essentials while your buying all this for her? “, something

like that, and she immediately gets defensive, saying stuff how she doesn’t want her kid to have a boring “babyhood”. I say the same thing

again, “ Totally get it, but if you have money for all this technically unimportant stuff(the extreme amount of decorations) why am I paying for

all this stuff “, and we go back n fourth. I find the fact that she’s buying all of this unnecessary stuff for a baby while

I’m stuck paying for things the kid actually needs, of course I want the kid to have toys, but everything else? She leaves and everyones

looking at me like I grew another head. I get whispers, n__ty looks, my mother saying I’m horrible for not wanting to help my sister(which

isn’t what I even said in our argument) and I just go. Of course we get over it not even 2 days later, I go

back to buying stuff, watching her kid. Another thing, I have to take days off work for her kid, so not only am I

not getting money from my jobs, I’m not getting any type of money from her. So because of that, I have to work 2x more

then what I did before, and rents close. I’m watching her kid, she gets home, kids asleep. I say “ I can’t do this

anymore, I’m stressed out with my jobs and rent is due soon, unless you can pay me some money back for all this, I

can’t do it. “ and bam, s__t storm. I don’t wanna get specific but the whole thing ends with her saying if i don’t

care about her kid i can leave, I love her lil baby, but I can’t get evicted, so I left. It didn’t even take

24hrs for me to get multiple texts, calls, all calling me names, saying I’m a horrible sister. a week later and I’m still getting

sarcastic and rude messages from my sister.. I’m stressed out, and my brains in scrambles. Am I the a__hole for all this? UPDATE: I

didn’t actually know how to update this wether it was comment or in post, but, Thank you for the many many people telling me

to grow a spine, I think I needed that. My sister came back to me the day this was posted which makes this update

easier, she said she needed me to watch her kid since nobody else would, which was ?? I asked about money and she said

“ Do it for the kid “. I told her I had to think about it, but now my answer is very clear. I blocked

her number and other family members talking crap. BUT I’m making a big guess here on why she wanted ME for all this. Like

everyone said, I am spineless. I would very obviously now do what she wanted even if it hurts me in the long run. I

asked one of my aunts about it after this theory popped up, since She was like, the only one that asked me if

I was okay. I asked if she’s ever asked anyone else to watch her kids, buy her stuff, and she’s asked half the

g__damn family. See, they have a brain and some self worth, so they asked for money in return, doing work gets you money

right? She’s GREEDY, thats the whole reason behind this. Why did she ask me for anything? because I was the only one who

didn’t ask for money back, and she was pissed when I did. I’m thinking that maybe I got cursed as a baby cause

all of this is so ridiculous, I’m seeing that now. How multiple family members saw her backing out because they wanted money and seeing

me getting used and still saying I’m the bad guy. No contact route. Having many many MANY people slapping me in the face

with the obvious truth of me being a doormat made this so much clearer, so THANK YOU. I saw a couple of people

asking about it being cultural, and I don’t actually know what that meanss? I grew up in Washington but my parents are from

Mexico, if thats an answer to that? I’m not contacting any of them, until I feel like it I guess, when I get

an apology maybe? Money back from all that work that almost cost me my apartment? Again, Thanks for everyone telling me I need

to actually do s__t for myself for once. If anything more happens I’ll update this again!

Oh, friend, my heart just feels so tender for the woman in this story. It is truly difficult to see someone working two jobs and risking their own home just to be a “good sister.” We often want to show up for our families in big ways, but we cannot pour from an empty cup.

It feels so unfair that her kindness was met with defensive behavior and cold looks from the rest of the family. It is a very lonely place to be when the people you love tell you that your survival is less important than someone else’s convenience. It takes so much courage to finally realize that you are allowed to prioritize your own needs and your own safety.

Expert Opinion

The situation this Redditor faced is a classic example of “enmeshment” where family boundaries become blurred and individual needs are ignored. In many families, especially those with strong cultural values like “familismo,” there is a deep pressure to sacrifice for the group at any cost.

According to research shared by Psychology Today, this cultural expectation can sometimes be used to justify unfair treatment or emotional guilt. While family loyalty is a beautiful thing, it becomes unhealthy when it leads to one person’s financial ruin or extreme stress.

Experts at Psych Central suggest that “people-pleasing” is often a survival strategy used to keep the peace. When a person feels like a “doormat,” they are actually trying to avoid the pain of conflict. However, setting a boundary is not an act of hate; it is an act of self-respect.

Dr. Harriet Lerner, a well-known psychologist and author, often notes that “if we don’t set boundaries, we end up feeling resentful and used.” This is exactly what happened here. The sister felt entitled to help because it had been given so freely for so long.

When a person finally says “no” after years of saying “yes,” the reaction is often explosive. This is because the other person has to give up a privilege they never truly earned. The transition to no-contact, though painful, is sometimes the only way to heal from that kind of systemic pressure.

Community Opinions

The community really stepped up to offer some “tough love” and a lot of encouragement for her to put herself first.

Commenters were confused why the sister didn’t use her own ample resources first.

Accomplished_Two1611 − I don't get it. The sister is married. She had the baby. It's her responsibility.

I thought this was some situation where the baby was in dire circumstances... In any case, I would be done, outside of bday presents and the like.

Tough_Crazy_8362 − I N F O: if she’s married and has a better job, why did you ever agree to buying things?

SatelliteBeach123 − NTA. I can't imagine why you started paying for anything!

Your sister clearly doesn't need the money and even if she did, you're not in a financial situation to finance HER child.

Readers encouraged the OP to see how she was allowing herself to be used.

[Reddit User] − You are NTA but you are a doormat. Giving to people who have more than you while you struggle is not an admirable trait.

It's a low self esteem trait. Everyday you should practice in front of the mirror saying the word NO.

DoIwantToKnow6417 − Y T A for nurturing her kid instead of your SPINE. STOP paying for her kid's essentials...

It's HER KID. HER RESPONSIBILITY. SHE HAS THE FUNDS. YOU DON'T!

Fluffy-Scheme7704 − YTA For allowing this and being a doormat!

Prudent_Border5060 − Yta You literally put your own financial security at risk... Your sister is a user.

You bent over backward. How could you not expect to be taken advantage of at this point.

Neighbors in the comments were shocked by the sister’s calculated behavior.

Mysterious-Froyo-909 − NTA your sister sound like an entitled A to say the least!

I'm honestly shocked that your family doesn't see this... Why would they even do it if they have money? Power? Status?

Kukka63 − NTA but such a huge Y T A to yourself, why on earth are you supporting this absolute nonsense.

You are being magnificently manipulated by people who do not give a damn about you or your wellbeing.

Some readers focused on the unfair guilt being pushed by the parents.

No_Mathematician2482 − NTA Why are you paying for a child that is not yours...

Nothing in this whole story makes sense to me. Maybe this is a cultural thing? Even your parents are being jerks.

vt2022cam − NTA - you can’t take days off work to watch her kids. Your sister is just selfish and using you, she doesn’t care if her selfishness destroys you.

How to Navigate a Situation Like This

Setting boundaries with family can feel very scary, but it is necessary for your survival. If you feel like a “doormat,” start by acknowledging that your needs matter just as much as anyone else’s. You are allowed to pay your rent before buying gifts for someone else’s child.

If someone reacts with anger to your boundary, it usually means that the boundary was very needed. Calmly explain your financial limits without apologizing for having them. If the pressure continues, it might be time to take a gentle step back. You do not owe anyone a relationship if it comes at the cost of your own mental and financial health.

Conclusion

This story reminds us that we have to be our own best advocates. It is wonderful to be a helpful aunt or sister, but it should never cost you your home or your peace of mind. True family will love you for who you are, not for what you can buy them.

What would you do if a wealthy relative asked you for money? Have you ever had to choose between family peace and your own survival? Let us share our thoughts on how to find that balance together.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/0 votes | 0%

Daniel Garcia

Daniel Garcia

Daniel is a contributing writer for DAILY HIGHLIGHT. Daniel is a New York-based author and has written for publications such as AUBTU Today, Digital Trends, Magazine, and many other media outlets.

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