Woman Is About To Become A Single Mother Via Artificial Insemination, Should She Tell The Guy She’s Dating?

When you’re embarking on a new relationship, there’s a lot to figure out. But for one woman, there’s an additional twist, she’s decided to become a single mother by choice through artificial insemination.

After spending years coming to terms with this decision, she now faces a dilemma: should she tell the man she’s dating about her plans to become a mom, especially when their relationship is still in its early stages?

While they’ve discussed having kids in the future, it was a light conversation, and she’s unsure whether it’s too soon to bring up the specifics of her plan. Her friend suggests waiting, but she’s unsure if that’s the right approach.

Should she tell him now, or is it better to wait? Let’s take a deeper look at this delicate situation and see what Reddit thinks about her choice.

A woman debates whether to tell a man she’s dating about her plans for artificial insemination

Here’s the update:

From the earliest days of attraction, there’s an unspoken contract between two people: shared honesty and gradually deepening trust. When one person intentionally reveals personal hopes and plans, especially something as pivotal as becoming a parent solo, that disclosure can either fortify the bond or disturb the equilibrium.

Psychological and communication‑studies research supports the idea that self‑disclosure builds intimacy, trust, and emotional connection between partners.

The Social Penetration Theory (SPT), a widely accepted model of relationship development, describes how interpersonal closeness grows step by step: as people share increasingly personal information, they move from superficial acquaintance to genuine intimacy.

Empirical studies find that thoughtful sharing of personal goals, fears, and aspirations strengthens relational bonds and helps both partners understand each other on a deeper level.

In the OP’s case, her decision to become a single mother isn’t a trivial detail, it’s a core life plan. If she waits too long to share it, and the relationship moves forward without that knowledge, the eventual revelation might feel jarring to her partner.

Under SPT and related research on self‑disclosure, hiding such a fundamental plan could create a gap between perceived intimacy and actual life‑direction. When expectations about life path diverge deeply, partners may feel misled or blindsided.

That said, research by EBSCO also cautions that timing and reciprocity matter. Self‑disclosure must align with the closeness level of the relationship. If shared too early, before partners feel secure, big reveals can backfire, causing discomfort or even withdrawal.

A misaligned disclosure may feel too intense for someone still gauging connection, especially when they themselves haven’t revealed much.

Given this, the choice to disclose now or wait depends on how serious OP considers the relationship with “G,” and how much trust and mutual openness already exist.

If meetings and conversations have felt sincere and there’s a sense of emotional potential, sharing her plan could serve as a litmus test, it reveals whether they are aligned on future priorities. It might feel risky, but it could save time and emotional investment if their goals fundamentally differ.

On the other hand, if this is still early and the connection remains light, holding off until the relationship solidifies is also within psychological norms. Gradual self‑disclosure can reduce pressure and allow the relationship to evolve naturally, giving both people space to grow emotionally without feeling overwhelmed.

In conclusion, the OP wouldn’t harm herself morally or psychologically by waiting a bit longer before telling G, timing matters. But she should be aware that, if the relationship deepens, eventually disclosing this plan becomes important for trust and mutual clarity.

If she decides she sees real potential in the relationship, a gentle conversation about life goals, even before pregnancy, could show respect for both her own values and G’s right to make informed decisions. After all, honesty and openness tend to build stronger, more sustainable connections.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

This group emphasized that the OP should tell their partner about the pregnancy plan sooner

These commenters pointed out that the OP’s decision to keep this information hidden could be manipulative and disrespectful

This group suggested that the OP’s actions are akin to hiding a major life decision

These users agreed that while it’s ultimately the OP’s decision to pursue insemination

While it’s never easy to share life-altering decisions with someone you’re still getting to know, being upfront about your intentions is critical for building trust and ensuring compatibility.

Is the woman wrong for keeping quiet about her plans to become a single mother, or should she have shared this information earlier on? What do you think? Should she be upfront now, or wait until the relationship develops further? Share your thoughts below!