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Millionaire Fiancee Says Groom’s “Mental Illness” Is Not Wanting To Owe Her For Getting Rich

by Annie Nguyen
November 29, 2025
in Social Issues

Money can complicate even the strongest relationships, especially when two people come from completely different financial worlds.

It is one thing to merge lives, but it becomes something else when expectations about wealth and entitlement begin creeping into the picture. Many couples wrestle with the question of what feels fair, yet few expect it to become the central conflict right before a wedding.

That is the uncomfortable crossroads the original poster found himself standing at. His fiancée comes from a level of wealth most people never encounter, while he is still working to build his own footing.

What started as a straightforward prenup discussion slowly revealed deeper beliefs about ownership, contribution, and what a partner might feel owed. Readers quickly sensed that the contract was only part of the tension. Keep reading to see how tangled things became once feelings about money surfaced.

A groom faces a harsh reality when his fiancée’s wealth sparks a prenup battle

Millionaire Fiancee Says Groom’s “Mental Illness” Is Not Wanting To Owe Her For Getting Rich
Not the actual photo.

'AITA for pushing back on a prenup where my fiancée’s family wants half my assets, even though she has $30M and I have less than $100K?'

 

I (male) am getting married in two months to my fiancée (female).

She comes from a very wealthy family and has multiple trust funds totaling around $30M.

She owns the $11M home we live in outright and earns $500K+/year in passive income (dividends, distributions, etc.).

She does not work and doesn’t plan to.

I, on the other hand, work full-time, earn around $200K/year, and have less than $100K in net worth.

I don’t own any property or equity outside of a small stake in my startup. In the past,

I have covered $5K/month in our shared expenses things like groceries, meals, and transportation and am open to doing something like this in marriage.

Her family has retained a top law firm, to draft the prenup.

They are proposing that, in the event of a divorce, she would be entitled to half of my net worth, even considering:

I would own no equity in the homes, cars, or any large lifestyle assets. I’m coming in with very little and trying to build up from there

They say this is “standard,” but nothing about our situation feels standard. I’ve proposed something I believe is far more fair:

We each keep what we bring into the marriage. Trusts and premarital assets stay separate, including any growth

We contribute to a shared fund (proportional or equal, TBD) for things like food, shared travel (so long as it's not outrageously expensive), childcare, etc..

No alimony or lump sums if we split, we simply part with what we earned

Possibly a clause where, if I ever reach a certain level of wealth (say, $10M+),

she’d be entitled to a capped portion (e.g. 35% of anything above that amount)  though even that is starting to feel unfair

She believes that because she is “funding our lifestyle,” staying home with future children, and providing a standard of living I couldn’t afford on my own,

she is owed something back in the event of a divorce. But I won’t own the home. I can’t make financial decisions.

I’m not building equity. It feels like I’m living in a world someone else built - and still being asked to pay for it later - like something is owed..

To me, marriage is about building a future together - not feeling like a guest.

AITA for feeling like this prenup is completely one-sided and for pushing for more autonomy and clarity around shared expenses, instead of just accepting what her family thinks is “standard”?

 

EDIT: she has agreed to remove the clause that says I'll owe her anything. all assets will be separate, including my earned income.

I'm waiting to be relieved until I see it in writing

 

Edit: BOTTOM LINE is that she feels because she is "funding my (luxurious) lifestyle" she is owed my money

AND I'm grappling with the validity of this and the fact that she says I'm the greedy one (especially if I "hit it big"

ALTHOUGH in principle she's said regardless she feels entitled to half but the below concession I considered she says would be generous of her)

EDIT* (see my identical comment below to opine) - Ok. Millions have viewed this.

Although there is nuance in our relationship that no one knows, this does seem to me to be a breaking point.

REGARDLESS of if when the prenup states all assets are separate and she gets nothing, she FEELS entitled to my money in the event of a divorce

because she is “funding the lifestyle” (with kids or without) - and this was confirmed a matter of minutes ago.

She says I’m crazy for not seeing it her way and she thinks I am acting mentally ill.

I told her I can’t enter a marriage with someone who feels that way.

She wants me to move out Monday and says that this is my fault and that I (meaning OP) am deciding to do this to her/us

FINAL WEEKEND EDIT I can’t be viewed as a private equity investment where she is the capital,

I’m the founder, and if I hit it big and for whatever reason we divorce, she gets a return.

I told her I want to postpone the wedding and work on us.

She is saying she won’t change her mind on how she feels even though she’ll remove it legally (from the prenup).

Her feelings about love-as-leverage are untenable. I’m open to working on this and getting counseling.

She’s saying that postponing the wedding is humiliating and our relationship will have 0 chance.

I believe what she’s saying, and feel free to tell me I’m wrong or TA: No matter how much I have,

if I help you, even with my own wealth, you’ll owe me if you win.. EDIT 5 ——-

PLEASE READ: she only FEELS entitled (not necessarily legally at this point because it’s being removed from prenup)

if I make a lot of money (not like 500k). “Wouldn’t you want to pay me back?”

AITA for thinking there is something warped about viewing our life like this? She thinks I’m being insane for trying to “control how she feels about this”

and storming out when I try to point out that her feelings affect me greatly in this context

Edit: this is getting a lot of responses. I have contacted a lawyer who is very expensive (yes, worth it).

I am meeting with him again in about 10 days. I have still not received the prenup. This is not fake.

IDGAF about karma. Imagine if you were in my position, you'd want to know if you were crazy but asking friends etc. isn't ideal

Many people discover that love becomes most complicated when security and fairness enter the conversation. Money does not create problems on its own, but it often reveals the hidden fears and expectations both partners carry.

Most readers can relate to the anxiety of stepping into a relationship where the financial playing field feels uneven and where one person’s success or contribution is suddenly weighed like a transaction rather than a shared future.

In this story, the OP isn’t simply reviewing a prenup. He is confronting a moment that forces him to question whether he is being welcomed as a partner or evaluated as an investment.

His fiancée’s immense family wealth places her in a world far removed from his own, and the request for a prenup that extracts half of his modest assets triggers a deeper emotional alarm.

The real tension lies in how each person interprets fairness. She views financial contribution as something that should be reciprocated, even decades later. He views marriage as a partnership where both bring what they can, without owing interest on love. This emotional mismatch is the true source of conflict.

A fresh perspective shows that people from wealthy backgrounds often see financial support as a form of care and therefore assume repayment emotional or financial, is natural.

Meanwhile, someone who has worked to build independence may feel diminished or controlled when their contributions are compared or monetized. This is not simply a disagreement about money; it is a clash of emotional frameworks shaped by upbringing, identity, and security.

Psychology Today explains that financial tension often becomes symbolic in relationships. It represents power, trust, vulnerability, and perceived fairness.

The article notes that when partners have different beliefs about money, it can create emotional imbalances that lead to resentment or uncertainty about long-term stability.

This insight directly applies to OP’s situation. Even after the problematic clause was removed, his fiancée’s belief that she is “owed” part of his future success suggests that the emotional imbalance remains.

The issue is not the contract but the mindset behind it. If she sees financial support as leverage, then OP’s fear of being evaluated instead of loved is understandable. The prenup discussion simply exposed what was already there.

In the end, OP’s caution reflects self-protection, not selfishness. Before any wedding moves forward, both partners would benefit from honest conversations, ideally with a therapist about financial values, expectations, and emotional boundaries.

Without shared principles of fairness and respect, even the most generous lifestyle cannot create a stable marriage.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

These commenters urged OP to secure independent legal help and avoid signing anything unfair

EnvironmentalWord242 − Dont sign anything without getting a lawyer first!

WhiskyForARealMan − Imma be honest, I'm unsure if that would even fly if challenged.

This is disproportionate and would likely not be enforced. EDIT: This is NOT a standard prenup,

and as stated would probably not hold up in court(possible, but probably not).

Any martial assets may be splittable, but the consensus in divorce is equitable and not equal.

The pre-nup is disproportionate(it looks like they are taking advantage of you, and it is, and the courts don't like that),

and an equitable divorce would likely get you some concessions where your wife would get none,

as a divorce would leave you penniless and her with millions.

Substantial-Air3395 − This should’ve been ironed out months ago. This is incredibly unfair, and I hope you have your own attorney.

This user described a wealthy woman who protected her spouse, contrasting OP’s situation sharply

Legitimate-Suit-4956 − Honestly I knew a couple in this situation (wealthy woman with trust funds, normal guy but with a good pension)

and she insisted on an ironclad prenup for HIM. She said in the event of a divorce she had no doubt

that she’d get n__ty and would have a ton of lawyers at her disposal.

She wanted to make sure he’d be leaving in a decent position if things ever ended.

Over ten years later, and they’re still happily married today.

Edit: I’d add that she made a point of making his pension protection iron clad on top of making sure he’d get some money from her

(I think the amount depended on how long they stayed married and if they had kids - she of course kept the supermajority of her funds).

She was protecting the man she loved while she loved him, to protect him from a potential hurt and angry her in the future.

The fact that this is what your financee is pushing for while she loves you is only showing you a fraction

of the vitriol you’d get if you got divorced without a prenup.

Point being, I would absolutely not marry this person without a prenup you’re comfortable with.

These Redditors insisted the prenup is exploitative and emotionally distorted

NoGuarantee3961 − Doesn't sound fair or standard to me. If you make 200k, you can afford a decent lawyer.

I would do one or more of the following. 1. no prenup 2. prenup, whats hers is hers, whats yours is yours,

the only shared marital assets are joint accounts/cars, keep finances as separate as possible. 3. OK, I am building no equity.

You can keep your house, use it as a venue, rent it, sell it, whatever.

But we are buying a place together, where I can afford my half, so I am able to build equity in something.

yeah, it won't be as big or as nice as where we are living, but that is fine with me. 4. Let's just not get marr 5. Let's break up.

CRK_76 − NTA. She has so much money and wants yours too. She is spoiled, entitled, and an i__ot if she thinks this is fair. Run away from this and...

UnfairDrawer2803 − she is worth 30 million and she makes you pay 1/2 expenses. how greedy.

Talking_-_Head − Honestly, I would walk away from this entirely. I'd rather live in a tin can I own, than a mansion that I have to get a permit to...

NoahVail2024 − More like indentured servitude than a marriage. NTA.

These commenters argued the marriage itself is a bad idea and OP would be foolish to continue

Vast-Fortune-1583 − YTA: If you still marry this woman. Wow.

Silent-Combination29 − Find a different woman. You're no match for this woman and her family.

They will eat you alive! I like your thoughts a lot more than hers. Your's are fair. Her's are not!

Ginger_Libra − YTA if you marry her. The part about her “funding your lifestyle” makes me gag. This isn’t a partnership my dude.

This lawyer explained fair prenup structures and highlighted how unbalanced hers is

MadTownMich − Lawyer here. Not your lawyer. I often draft prenups that address a sort of vesting schedule.

If you are married less than 5 years, each get your own. If you are married 5-10 years, she would have to pay you a certain amount

in either property division or maintenance. Those numbers increase for 10-15 years, and 15-20. After 20+, a big chunk.

These funds can come from both of you contributing to a joint investment account

(and yes, she should contribute a higher amount). It is really important to have your own, experienced lawyer.

If done right, prenup negotiations can actually be a helpful way for both of you to talk about fairness with money

and then neither one of you have to worry in the future about unknowns. But she is the one who is going to have to give up some money.

And keep her parents out of this. The two of you might also benefit from remarriage counseling.

And to those who say you should never get a prenup, buzz off.

I’ve been doing this work for 20+ years, and so far only one couple I worked with got divorced.

Money is a huge reason people get divorced. Talking about ahead of time, while challenging, allows them to move forward free of misunderstandings.

These commenters criticized the fiancée’s entitlement, noting she already has lifelong security

OllieOllieOxenfry − My friend just married a guy who started a successful company so they got a pre-nup.

how much the other party likes or respects their partner. It sounds like your partner is very selfish and entitled.

Women can and should be entitled to half if they have been stay at home moms in the case

they have no other financial recourse or way to financially support themselves.

Given that she will ALWAYS be financially set for life, why would she want to also take more from you? It just seems so selfish.

If anything, the prenup should specify that if you have kids then get a divorce you are entitled

to part of her fortune to ensure you can give kids a similar quality of life when they are in your care.

Intelligent-Jump1823 − Why, in the event of any separation, would the party with oodles more assets TAKE anything?

Don’t sign that. Its wrong to have even proposed that. Instead, let me marry her. I’ll sign it.

If we divorce, she can have my 1990 Toyota Corolla, one of the sweaters my grandmother made for me, and $17.85 cash.

In the end, this situation isn’t just about a prenup it’s about two people who fundamentally disagree on what partnership means when money, power, and “what-if” futures collide.

OP isn’t wrong for wanting emotional and financial safety, but his fiancée’s belief that future success automatically becomes a debt he owes back raises real questions about control, trust, and long-term compatibility.

Do you think OP’s hesitation is justified given the stakes, or is he overreacting to her feelings instead of her actions? And would you sign this prenup? Sound off below.

Annie Nguyen

Annie Nguyen

Hi, I'm Annie Nguyen. I'm a freelance writer and editor for Daily Highlight with experience across lifestyle, wellness, and personal growth publications. Living in San Francisco gives me endless inspiration, from cozy coffee shop corners to weekend hikes along the coast. Thanks for reading!

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