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Man Takes Back Gifted SUV From Partner’s Idle 19-Year-Old Son To Teach Responsibility Lesson

by Jeffrey Stone
December 17, 2025
in Social Issues

A partner’s generous handover of a roomy SUV keys aimed to spark a young adult’s independence, but the vehicle ended up idle as excuses mounted higher than its odometer reading. Family tension escalated when the 19-year-old, claiming no job without transport, received a free 2009 GMC Yukon Denali XL from the partner’s parent figure upgrading their own car.

The deal hinged on landing full-time work within two months to earn the title transfer. Yet months passed with ignored opportunities, including a local pet store position, and outright rejection of anything not perfectly aligned with animal-related dreams despite lacking experience. Dust gathered on the still-titled-in-giver’s-name SUV while friends deemed reclaiming it too strict, but the giver held firm on the unmet condition.

A man reclaimed a conditionally offered car from a jobless 19-year-old stepchild.

Man Takes Back Gifted SUV From Partner's Idle 19-Year-Old Son To Teach Responsibility Lesson
Not the actual photo.

'AITA for standing my ground on taking a car back that I “gifted” to a 19yr old?'

This is not my child, but the child of my SO. First, said child said that he couldn’t get a job because he didn’t have a car.

Well, I was planning on getting a new car so I said he could have the car for free (a 2009 GMC Yukon Denali XL with about 150,000 on it)...

The registration was paid for as well as 6 months of insurance. So I took the job excuse off the table.

I stated title wouldn’t be signed over until the stipulations had been met. This was back in May.

He has had multiple job opportunities but they haven’t been what he wanted.

Now he says he just doesn’t want a full time job right now, unless it was working with animals… which he has no experience, and therefore nobody will hire him.

I even told him that the local pet store was hiring almost 3 weeks ago… yet no job…

My friends are telling me I am an a__hole for taking the car back, but it is still in my name,

and it is just rotting in his driveway and he is now just outright refusing to work!

Meeting the family of your partner can sometimes feel like navigating a tricky road trip. Full of unexpected detours and the occasional pothole. In this case, one Redditor tried to pave the way for their partner’s 19-year-old child with a seriously generous gesture: a free SUV to solve the “no car, no job” dilemma.

But here’s where the plot thickens. The offer came with a straightforward stipulation: a full-time job within two months, to encourage responsibility and independence. Months later, opportunities came and went, from general openings to a spot at a local pet store.

The young adult turned them down, deciding full-time work just wasn’t the vibe right now unless it perfectly matched a dream role with animals (despite no experience). The vehicle, meant to be a stepping stone, ended up parked and unused, while the Redditor covered the lingering costs indirectly.

From one side, it’s easy to see the frustration: the poster went above and beyond, removing barriers and setting a reasonable goal to build work ethic. Friends argue it’s unfair to pull back on what’s perceived as a gift, especially for a “new adult” figuring things out.

Yet others point out it wasn’t an unconditional handout. It was an incentive with clear terms, like a contract to motivate action. The young adult’s pickiness raises eyebrows too. Rejecting entry-level roles might delay real-world skills like reliability and perseverance.

This situation shines a light on broader family dynamics around supporting young adults transitioning to independence. Many 19-year-olds juggle part-time work, school, or entry-level jobs to gain experience and financial footing.

According to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, in July 2025, about 59.5% of 16- to 24-year-olds were in the labor force – working or actively seeking work – highlighting that employment is a common step at this age.

Experts emphasize the value of early work experiences. Part-time or entry-level jobs often teach time management, responsibility, and the realities of earning, which can foster long-term success, with research showing that seasonal and part-time employment for teenagers and young adults has almost universally positive impacts on physical well-being, mental health, and more.

As one analysis notes, incorporating entry-level “now jobs” as part of broader supports can be a powerful tool to get more young adults on the pathway to careers, helping them develop strategies for balancing commitments and building foundational skills that benefit future success.

Parenting advisors also weigh in on incentives. Clinical psychologist David Anderson, from the Child Mind Institute, supports using positive reinforcements thoughtfully, noting that “rewards given to improve a specific behavior are needed for only a few weeks or months, and then you move on to your next goal.”

In this scenario, the pre-agreed condition aimed to link reward with effort – a neutral approach to encourage growth without enabling avoidance.

Ultimately, neutral solutions could include renewing the offer with a fresh timeline, exploring part-time options for flexibility, or discussing underlying reasons for reluctance, like needing guidance on applications or building confidence. Open family talks might bridge perspectives, balancing support with accountability.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

Some people view the car as a conditional incentive, not a true gift, justifying taking it back for non-compliance.

Apart-Ad-6518 − Normally taking back a gift would be finger right on the Y but: NTA one bit...

"child said that he couldn’t get a job because he didn’t have a car. Well, I was planning on getting a new car so I said he could have the...

as long as he obtained a full time job within 2 months. The registration was paid for as well as 6 months of insurance."

As you say he turned down numerous job opportunities. They may not have been "what he wanted" but he'd be earning & other opportunities could open up. Y

ou've been totally fair imo. The pet store thing totally shows he doesn't want to work on top of the incentive of the car.

Euphoric_Travel2541 − NTA. There were clear conditions to your “gift”. He hasn’t satisfied them. He doesn’t get the car.

You can make the same offer once again with the same conditions, but I wouldn’t do it a third time.

And you have been generous and gone out of your way to find him opportunities and employment.

Now, he should discover what it means to work at a job to pay for (at least some) his living expenses, and not turn his nose up at any honest...

Shame on him for being so picky. Is this guy even in college classes or something promising in the meantime?

kikiacab − The truck was supposed to be an incentive and a reward, the incentive didn't work so why let him keep the reward? NTA.

No_Swimmer6221 − You didn’t give a gift. You made a contract. He did not uphold his part. You can take your part back.

But, on a more human level, children need to learn adult skills, like finding and doing work for money. You should not enable his not working. Don’t listen to your...

Some people emphasize the OP’s generosity and argue the son needs to learn responsibility without enabling laziness.

StAlvis − NTA You have been more than generous.

At0mic1impact − My friends are telling me I am an a__hole for taking the car back Your friends must have loved getting participation trophies. NTA.

You made stipulations in exchange for a vehicle. You aren't 'giving' him a car; you are making him earn it.

emdboy − NTA. The car was a reward for something he hasn’t done yet. Maybe taking the car will give him the motivation to actually do the task.

Lumpy_Ear2441 − NTA ~ Your friends said you are wrong, because he's a "new" adult, and is still young??!! 19!!!

I had a job at 16 and I didn't have a car. I rode my bike. I didn't get a car until I was 18. What?!

Everyone has to "baby" him, until he "feels like" working? ?!!! You told him he could have it, IF he got a full-time job in 2 months.

He certainly doesn't appreciate such a GENEROUS gift! (it doesn't matter if it had 150,000 miles on it). TAKE IT BACK!!! He needs to grow up.

Some people support reclaiming the car and suggest consequences or alternatives for the son’s behavior.

oliverwhitham − NTA, but you could hilariously become the a__hole by giving it to whoever took the job at the pet store

Free2Be2 − NTA - 2 months in and no job; vehicle goes back to you as he did not hold up his end of the bargain.

Get your vehicle back, sell it or whatever and if anyone has anything negative to say about it; tell them to give their vehicle to him.

brogangles1 − NTA. You told him what you wanted him to do and he didn't do it. He didn't meet the criteria

MiddleHuckleberry445 − NTA. In behavior, we call this a clear and firm contingency.

He didn’t follow through so that means he doesn’t get the car. Simple.

CrazyOldBag − INFO: If he’s 19 and not in school, is your SO still paying child support for the slug?

This Reddit saga wraps up with a reminder that good intentions on the road to independence don’t always guarantee smooth sailing. Sometimes a detour teaches the best lessons. The Redditor’s stand highlights the tricky balance of generosity and boundaries in blended families.

Do you think holding firm on the job condition was fair, considering the effort to help launch a young adult? Or could a more flexible approach have kept the peace? How would you handle motivating responsibility without sparking backlash? Drop your thoughts below, we’re all ears for those real-talk opinions!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/0 votes | 0%

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone is a valuable freelance writer at DAILY HIGHLIGHT. As a senior entertainment and news writer, Jeffrey brings a wealth of expertise in the field, specifically focusing on the entertainment industry.

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