Daily Highlight
No Result
View All Result
  • MOVIE
  • TV
  • CELEB
  • ENTERTAINMENT
  • MCU
  • DISNEY
  • About US
Daily Highlight
No Result
View All Result

Teen Rejected A Christmas Gift, Then Demanded It Back Months Later

by Leona Pham
February 11, 2026
in Social Issues

Teenagers are not always polite, especially when family dynamics feel unstable. Still, adults are expected to respond with patience, even when their efforts are brushed aside. The problem is that patience has limits, and hurt feelings do not magically disappear.

One woman thought she was doing something kind by including both of her boyfriend’s daughters in her Christmas plans. When the older one rejected the gift outright, she accepted it and moved on.

But when the request for the same necklace resurfaced later, she was not sure she wanted to pretend the earlier rejection never happened. Keep reading to find out why this small item sparked a bigger debate about maturity and grace.

A woman refuses to hand over a Christmas gift after her boyfriend’s teen initially rejected it

Teen Rejected A Christmas Gift, Then Demanded It Back Months Later
not the actual photo

'AITA for refusing to give "back" a gift that my boyfriend's daughter (13) had already refused to accept?'

My boyfriend (37M) has two daughters. A 10 year old and a 13 year old. We've been dating for about 3 years now.

I get along well with the younger daughter and she and I'm kind of like a big sister/auntie to her.

The older daughter does not like me and makes it clear that she would rather her father not date me (or anyone else from what I gather).

Boyfriend and his ex share custody and this year, since my boyfriend had them for Christmas,

I got them both presents (got them both necklaces).

10 year old was very excited and happy with her gift.

13 year old got huffy and said she didn't want anything from me and refused to "accept" the gift.

10 year old also opened 13 year old's gift after she refused to accept it and I could tell that she did like what I'd got her.

I decided to keep it for myself.

Fast forward to today, 13 year old calls and she wants the necklace.

She didn't apologise for her rude behaviour from before or anything (which I honestly don't care too much about).

She asked me to give it to her since it's "hers" and "you already bought it".

I told her that it wasn't hers since she refused to accept the gift and that I'm not going to give it "back" to her.

She got upset and complained to my boyfriend who told her it was up to me whether or not I wanted to give her the gift anymore.

Am I being too harsh on her? My sister thinks I'm just making my own life more difficult by not just giving it to her.

Is it petty of me? AITA for refusing to give a gift that I did buy for her?

Edit: ok, I did not expect this post to get so much attention. Just to clarify a few things that are being asked, I'm 27.

No, this is not the first time I've got them gifts. I didn't write down my thought process properly;

I've got them gifts before but they were "experiences" based gifts (for an example passes to amusement parks etc).

This year because I was actually spending the day with them, I wanted to give a "proper" gift

that they can actually keep and immediately "have" if that makes sense. And yes, I kept it for myself.

What else am I supposed to do with a rejected gift?

Anyway, I realise that I did not handle this in the best way. I'll be seeing her today and explaining to her how I felt

and why didn't want to give it to her again and explain that perhaps we both could learn to appreciate the sentiment behind gifts better.

I think I will decide what to do with the actual gift after having a proper conversation with her and seeing how that goes

(especially since I already exchanged the necklace for a different one and no longer have the original one I got for her).

Thanks for all the ideas as to how to approach her and this conversation.

And yes I understand that she is still dealing with her parents breaking up and I feel for her, I really do.

When families blend, emotions rarely follow a straight line. Adults may see gifts as gestures of kindness, but teenagers sometimes experience them as symbols of something much bigger, loyalty, change, and loss.

In this situation, the necklace was never just jewelry. The 13-year-old’s initial rejection likely reflected her ongoing discomfort with her father’s relationship. Adolescence is already a period of identity formation and emotional intensity.

Adding divorce and a parent’s new partner to that mix can heighten defensiveness. Her refusal at Christmas may have been less about the object and more about asserting control in a situation where she feels she has very little.

Later asking for the necklace, without apology, may signal embarrassment, pride, or difficulty admitting she liked it in the first place.

Research consistently shows that teenagers struggle differently than younger children when adjusting to parental divorce and new partners.

According to Psychology Today, adolescents often experience stronger loyalty conflicts and emotional tension when a parent begins dating.

Resistance toward a parent’s partner can stem from fear of replacement, unresolved grief, or divided allegiance rather than personal dislike.

Further research published through PubMed highlights that adolescents’ adjustment to a parent’s new relationship depends heavily on how secure they feel in their existing bonds. When teens perceive emotional shifts in family structure, their reactions can include withdrawal, defiance, or rejection behaviors.

A fresh perspective reveals that both sides were protecting something. The girlfriend was protecting her dignity. Rejection hurts, especially after making a thoughtful effort. Keeping the necklace felt like maintaining self-respect.

Meanwhile, the teenager was likely protecting her emotional territory. Accepting the gift publicly may have felt like endorsing a relationship she is still struggling to process.

Experts on adolescent development emphasize that teens are still developing emotional regulation and conflict repair skills. When adults respond with steadiness rather than mirrored pride, it often diffuses long-term tension. Adolescents frequently test boundaries but also look to adults to model emotional flexibility.

The deeper issue here isn’t ownership of a necklace. It’s how power dynamics unfold in blended families. Refusing to give the gift back may feel fair in the short term, but blended families often require adults to play the long game. Fairness and emotional maturity are not always identical.

This doesn’t make the girlfriend petty, it makes her human. But the question becomes less about who is right and more about what builds stability. In step-family dynamics, generosity sometimes functions less as reward and more as reassurance: “You are not being replaced, and I am not your enemy.”

In complex family systems, winning the moment rarely matters as much as preserving the relationship.

Check out how the community responded:

These commenters urged OP to be the adult and rebuild the bond gently

imissaolchatrooms − NTA, but... You are dealing with a 13 yo child. Be the adult. Use this as an opportunity to grow the relationship.

Tell her you spent time picking it out for her. Give it to her, no strings attached, maybe even wrap it up again.

Then smile, tell her it looks better on her than you even thought.

If you wish for a long term positive relationship, then take every opportunity to reduce the drama and build the relationship.

MissSinnlos − Divorce kid and child educator here. I'd say sit her down and tell her that of course she can have the necklace.

Apologize for being so harsh about it first but that you felt hurt because you love her and are trying to build a friendship with her.

Maybe reiterate that you absolutely do not want to replace her mom but want to be friends and have fun together instead of fighting.

You can tell her that he behaviour caught you off guard and that people can make mistakes and apologize.

Ask her if maybe she could think about apologizing. Not now, not today, but it would make you happy if she could.

If she can't you're still going to love her and continue to try and build that relationship.

You really need to be the bigger person here and it will be beneficial for your relationship if this is your approach.

She is insecure, hurt and aloof, don't expect the same level of emotional control as from an adult.

If she realizes it's okay to make mistakes around you she will likely let her guard down and start being a bit more open and approachable.

Good luck! Edited to say: NAH if you resolve this is in a loving, mature way.

These commenters backed OP setting boundaries and requiring an apology first

frecklesxmcgee − NTA. You’re setting boundaries with how she can treat you.

If you were to just give it to her without letting her know what a jerk she was she’ll just keep trying to push you around.

I think this would be a good learning opportunity where you can sit down and let her know how rude

she was both with accepting the gift and demanding it back.

Depending on how that conversation goes you could give her the necklace.

But I also think if you don’t want to do that that’s totally fine too and she’ll still learn a lesson.

[Reddit User] − NTA. This is right, she needs to learn and I am glad your bf has your back. Good move by him.

If she apologizes and acknowledges her behavior, I would then, and only then lol, give her the necklace.

[Reddit User] − NTA. All of the responses saying that you're the a__hole based on the fact that she's "just a kid."

That's exactly why she shouldn't get the present. People who grow up to be controlling, rude, and entitled assholes

probably had a childhood with parents who let them do whatever they wanted despite all of their bad behavior.

(I'm not saying that the 13-year-old is a controlling, rude, and entitled a__hole, but you get my point).

Kids who get what they want all the time will never learn that bad actions = bad outcomes. She shouldn't have her way when she was that rude to you.

This commenter felt it’s normal teen behavior and no one is malicious

StJiub911 − NAH. The kid is young, starting puberty, and probably had a tough childhood with the parents divorce and such

so it's reasonable for the 13yo not to like you at this stage. She will grow out of it though.

If she refused the gift in that manner, it's totally reasonable for you not to give it to her without an apology otherwise she won't learn.

This group said OP must act mature and not escalate conflict with a teen

everyvillanislimes − ESH and NTA - you cant expect a 13 year old girl to NOT be pissy at you.

Its just how it goes when parents split up and one kid isnt happy about it.

she shouldnt be treating you this way, but theres no way you can ever hope your relationship w her

will be more than what it is now unless you practice being kind to her no matter what.

the necklace isnt a big deal, her sister has one and i’m sure she feels left out and really does care about you,

she just can't show it because of her anger w her parents situation. she’ll grow out of it.

give her the necklace and try to talk this out face to face with her before you give it to her

TeenyMom − ESH - you are fighting with a 13 year old girl over a necklace that you gave her. Kinda s__tty, and pretty stupid. Shes 13.

She has little control over her emotions, shes probably having a very hard time moving on from her parents breaking up,

and now she has to try and let someone else (you) into her life? That's hard on her.

Now you're making a big deal out of a stupid necklace. Come on. Is this really your hill to die on?

[Reddit User] − ESH - Seems like a wasted opportunity to connect with her.

gambitdangit − ESH you’ve been with their dad for three years and you got them a gift for Christmas only because he had them on that day?

No wonder the relationship with the kid isn’t great if you treat them like an afterthought.

You’re the adult, possibly going to be the stepmother. You are responsible for this relationship.

Stop blaming a 13 year old for acting like a 13 year old.

footfaceball − ESH- she's clearly acting badly, however she is a teenager.

I think that you as the adult need to make an effort to have a good relationship with her even if she's making it difficult.

I don't think you're TA for not letting her have it straight away,

but I think you would be TA if you didn't talk to her about it and give it back to her if she apologizes.

These commenters criticized OP’s effort level and called them the problem

tammigirl6767 − You’ve been dating this man for three years

and the only reason you bought little gifts for his children for Christmas is because he had them on Christmas day? YTA Infinity

leahsimsxo − YTA. How old are you? I agree with your sister, if you can see yourself marrying your boyfriend,

it would be beneficial to have a decent relationship with her.

Have you ever tried talking to the girls bio mom about her dislike towards you? I wonder how hard you’ve tried to solve this issue.

Miserable-Pepper − YTA . .. I think if she wanted the necklace back, it was probably because she -does- want to foster a connection with you.

She's obviously in a lot of pain over the separation of her parents; it’s not fair for her to take it out on you, but can you seriously blame her?

13 year olds are assholes.

I think that holding past actions against her is only going to fuel that resentment.

If you actually want to break through this and connect with her in a meaningful way, you need to let go.

Many readers agreed the teen’s behavior was rude. But others reminded everyone that adolescence plus divorce equals emotional chaos.

So what matters more here, principle or connection? Should the girlfriend stand firm to teach a lesson, or soften her stance to build trust?

If you were in her shoes, would you give the necklace back or keep it as a reminder of boundaries? Share your thoughts below.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/0 votes | 0%

Leona Pham

Leona Pham

Hi, I'm Leona. I'm a writer for Daily Highlight and have had my work published in a variety of other media outlets. I'm also a New York-based author, and am always interested in new opportunities to share my work with the world. When I'm not writing, I enjoy spending time with my family and friends. Thanks for reading!

Related Posts

Wife Calls Husband ‘Unreliable’ After He Misses High-Risk Pregnancy Appointment For Sister’s Minor Injury
Social Issues

Wife Calls Husband ‘Unreliable’ After He Misses High-Risk Pregnancy Appointment For Sister’s Minor Injury

2 months ago
He Matched With His Loudest Critic – Now He’s Unsure What to Do Next
Social Issues

He Matched With His Loudest Critic – Now He’s Unsure What to Do Next

6 months ago
Part-Time Worker Outsmarts Overtime Ban by Starting Lockup Early – Boss Panics and Reverses Policy
Social Issues

Part-Time Worker Outsmarts Overtime Ban by Starting Lockup Early – Boss Panics and Reverses Policy

3 months ago
This Man Found a Text from His Wife’s Boss Calling Her “An Angel”—Now Their Marriage Is on the Line
Social Issues

This Man Found a Text from His Wife’s Boss Calling Her “An Angel”—Now Their Marriage Is on the Line

7 months ago
Girlfriend Catches Boyfriend Cheating, Steals Mistress’s Jeans, Then Refuses To Give Them Back
Social Issues

Girlfriend Catches Boyfriend Cheating, Steals Mistress’s Jeans, Then Refuses To Give Them Back

5 months ago
Grandparents Save Money For Late Daughter’s Kids, Son-In-Law Loses It When He Finds Out
Social Issues

Grandparents Save Money For Late Daughter’s Kids, Son-In-Law Loses It When He Finds Out

2 months ago

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

POST

Email me new posts

Email me new comments

Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.




  • Trending
  • Comments
  • Latest

Recent Posts

No Content Available

Browse by Category

  • Blog
  • CELEB
  • Comics
  • DC
  • DISNEY
  • ENTERTAINMENT
  • Illustrations
  • Lifestyle
  • MCU
  • MOVIE
  • News
  • NFL
  • Social Issues
  • Sport
  • Star Wars
  • TV

Follow Us

  • About US
  • Contact US
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of Service
  • Syndication
  • DMCA
  • Sitemap

© 2024 DAILYHIGHLIGHT.COM

No Result
View All Result
  • MOVIE
  • TV
  • CELEB
  • ENTERTAINMENT
  • MCU
  • DISNEY
  • About US

© 2024 DAILYHIGHLIGHT.COM