Marriage is often a test of endurance, especially when illness becomes a constant visitor in the relationship. One woman found herself living in a cycle of fear, exhaustion, and guilt while trying to keep her husband alive through his unpredictable diabetic episodes.
But when a frightening night ended with her calling an ambulance for him yet again, she realized she’d reached her emotional limit. Later that morning, her husband called from the hospital asking for a ride home, and she said no.
What happened next divided not only their families but also the internet.
It’s clear the OP has reached an emotional limit after repeated crisis-moments.
From one viewpoint, the husband holds primary responsibility for managing his chronic illness, he’s aware (or should be) of the dangers of poor monitoring, non-compliance, and the mechanical breakdown of his pump.
His behaviour, aggressive during lows and dismissive of his wife’s fear, adds relational strain.
On the other hand, the spouse (the OP) has provided repeated emergent intervention, lived in fear, and is carrying the added strain of pregnancy and a foreboding sense that one day she may find him dead. Her refusal to continue in the same emergency-rescue role is understandable.
The dynamic becomes less about “who did wrong this one time” and more about “who has been carrying what weight for how long?” She did not force him to walk home; she set a boundary after recurring trauma.
This situation mirrors a broader social issue, the burdens borne by partners of chronically ill individuals.
Research shows caregivers and partners frequently experience high stress, fatigue, anxiety, and impaired quality of life. For example, one study found that spouses of chronically ill persons report high strain even beyond caregiving time alone, “a chronic physical disease … can also distort the life of the healthy partner.”
Another investigation noted moderate to high caregiver strain is common, with significant physical and psychological effects.
“Caregiving has all the features of a chronic stress experience: it creates physical and psychological strain over extended periods of time.” — Schulz & Martire (2008)
This captures the OP’s predicament, the repeated emergency responses, the fear, the emotional toll. Her boundary-setting is less about abandonment and more about surviving the stress cycle.
OP could start with a calm, planned talk with her husband about her emotional exhaustion and the limits of her capacity, emphasizing the shared responsibility for his care.
Seeking couple or chronic-illness-specific therapy could help redefine their roles and develop realistic protocols for emergencies. She should also create a backup system involving friends or family so that every incident doesn’t fall solely on her shoulders.
Above all, OP needs to prioritise her own and her baby’s health, maintaining boundaries that safeguard her from burnout while encouraging her husband to take consistent ownership of his condition.
Check out how the community responded:
These Redditors didn’t mince words, they called the situation unsafe and urged the woman to get out before things escalated further.
This group roasted the husband’s excuse of “low blood sugar” as a reason for cruelty.
These users took a more pragmatic approach, pointing out that OP couldn’t keep functioning as her husband’s caretaker once the baby arrived.
Both commenters, speaking from medical and personal experience, made it clear that diabetes doesn’t cause someone to spew hateful abuse.
Finally, this blunt bunch cheered for OP to stop tolerating the dysfunction altogether.
This story left readers torn between compassion and exhaustion. Emotional burnout is real, especially when care turns into survival management.
Was she heartless for refusing the ride, or simply protecting her sanity and unborn child after years of crisis?
Do you think her decision was justified, or did she let resentment speak louder than reason? Drop your thoughts and verdicts in the comments below!
