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Man Gets Mad at Wife for Not Packing His Slacks… Even Though He Left Them in the Laundry Basket

by Charles Butler
October 28, 2025
in Social Issues

A sudden work trip can turn even the calmest household into chaos. That was the case for a 31-year-old man rushing to prepare for his early morning departure. He needed clean shirts, new slacks, and everything ready before dawn.

Both he and his wife were tired, juggling chores late into the night. She washed his shirts, packed the suitcase, and tried to help keep things on track. He asked whether his pants were in the bag, and she said yes.

The next day, he opened his suitcase in the hotel room and found only khakis. The slacks he had bought specifically for the trip were missing. Frustration flooded in, and he immediately called his wife to ask why they were not packed.

The call quickly turned tense. She believed he meant khakis when he asked about pants. He believed she had promised the new slacks were already inside. The misunderstanding led to blame, anger, and judgment from thousands of strangers on Reddit.

Man Gets Mad at Wife for Not Packing His Slacks… Even Though He Left Them in the Laundry Basket
Not the actual photo

Reddit crowned him the ultimate YTA. Ready to fold the facts?

AITA for saying it’s my wife’s fault that my slacks didn’t get packed for my work trip?

Hi, first time poster. My wife (30F) and I (31M) have been married for about 7 years now.

I decided to go on a last minute work trip which caused me to have to book flights, hotel, etc.

late at night and then fly out the next day. I needed new work slacks for the trip since I’ve primarily been working from home in my current company,

so we had to make a late night run to the local Walmart to get a few pairs.

We also got some button up shirts. When we got home I had some stuff to finish up with the planning

so I asked my wife to wash my new clothes so that my shirts weren’t so wrinkly.

I handed her the shirts to wash separately and put the pants in the dirty laundry.

While they washed she packed my suitcase and then added the shirts when they were done.

When it came time to leave, I verified everything was packed by asking her if she packed my pants. She said yes.

Cue to late the next night when I arrive at my hotel and my slacks aren’t in there—only my brown khakis and gray khakis.

I called her pretty upset asking where my slacks were. She got defensive and told me she thought she packed all my clothes

(I had laid them out on the bed besides the stuff to be washed) and told me they should be in there.

I made her check the laundry room to be sure and she looked around the whole house before finding them in our bedroom laundry basket unwashed.

I repeated a few times how I was frustrated that she hadn’t packed them but had told me that she did.

She said she didn’t realize by “pants” I meant my slacks and that she was busy trying to do other stuff and just had a memory of packing some pants...

She also said it was unreasonable for me to be upset with her when they are my pants and she didn’t think she was expected to do a whole second...

In the end she attempted to make me feel better by saying that it would be okay and my work would understand that

sometimes things get a bit hectic with packing and traveling last minute (and I can buy more in the evening hopefully).

I feel kind of bad cause I could tell she was frustrated with me for blaming her, but in my defense I did ask her if she had packed everything.

Edit/Update: I accept that IATA and have apologized to my wife. She responded graciously and told me she knows a lot of it was just my stress from traveling and...

We are good now and I promised to do better in the future. Thanks to everyone who engaged with me civilly in the comments.

I showed my wife the post and she wants to say that she is a little surprised at how angry everyone else was

(she says she was frustrated but knew it’s not a pattern), especially some individual messages that some very angry people decided to send me.

TL;DR my wife forgot to pack my slacks for a work trip and I was frustrated with her over the phone so we argued. AITA?

Background and Rising Conflict

In his post, the husband explained that he had purchased new slacks and shirts the day before his trip. He was exhausted and running out of time. He asked his wife to wash the shirts while he placed the slacks near the bed to be packed.

The laundry finished, shirts were folded, and the suitcase was filled. The house was quiet except for the sound of packing zippers and footsteps preparing for morning.

Before they went to sleep, he asked his wife, “Did you pack my pants?” He said she told him everything was in the bag. He went to bed assuming all was covered.

The next day, when he opened the suitcase in his hotel room, he found only khakis. The slacks were still at home. He felt blindsided and called his wife immediately. His tone sounded more accusing than curious, and the conversation shifted from a missing garment to who deserved blame.

She said she thought he was referring to the khakis. He said he clearly meant the new slacks. The discussion escalated into raised voices, hurt feelings, and resentment about responsibility. Both felt misunderstood.

He went to Walmart that evening to buy new slacks, paying out of pocket for something he believed was avoidable. Meanwhile, his wife stayed home feeling blamed for a mistake she considered unintentional. The argument lingered long after the suitcase was repacked.

Reflection and Analysis

The situation was not only about forgotten clothing. It revealed assumptions, communication gaps, and the pressure of shared responsibilities.

He believed confirming verbally was enough. She believed she had packed the pants he meant. Neither paused to carefully check the contents before the suitcase was zipped. Small miscommunications often grow larger when both people are tired and stressed.

Relationship expert John Gottman writes that blame can wear down trust over time.

He notes that when one partner shifts responsibility to the other for something that could have been double-checked, it signals a lack of personal accountability. His work emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and shared clarity in daily interactions.

A Travel + Leisure survey found that most adults double-check their luggage themselves, especially when something is essential for the trip. Habits like verifying clothing items before leaving can help diffuse stress before it builds.

In this situation, his frustration was understandable. He needed the slacks and they were not there. But the responsibility for packing belonged to him.

She was helping as a favor, not acting as his assistant. The misunderstanding did not come from carelessness, but from unclear expectations and rushing.

A calmer approach might have looked like acknowledging the stress on both sides. He could have checked the suitcase. She could have asked which pants he meant. Neither did.

Blame solved nothing. Understanding could have prevented the conflict.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

Many felt he relied too heavily on his wife and then directed his frustration toward her. 

Spineberry − YTA - you're a grown adult and should be doing your own packing and laundry.

It is your responsibility to check that all the items were in the suitcase before leaving I'm also not sure why you put the clothes in a dirty garment hamper,

as the only reason they would have been discovered is if your wife decided in the middle of the chaos of your departure to put a load of laundry on.

If you wanted these specific items washed at once, they should have been in the direct vicinity of the washing machine,

or you should have put them on yourself. Putting washing on takes all of a minute

realstareyes − YTA. My friend, you‘re 31 years old and a fully grown adult. She made a minor mistake without any bad intentions. Guess what?

You‘re old enough and hopefully capable of packing your stuff on your own, including your beloved slacks. Your reaction should serve her as a warning.

Poesy-WordHoard − I verified everything was packed by asking her if she packed my pants So. you verified by asking. Not by verifying.

Others pointed out that she was trying to help and made an honest mistake. 

slee82612 − YTA. Is your washing machine in your bedroom? Is your wife a mind reader?

Hellsbellsbeans − YTA. You had time to lay it all out for her to pack, but not pack yourself?

And why, if this was such urgent laundry, would you put the urgent items in a hamper in your bedroom?

Why not actually put them in the room that the laundry gets done in? And lastly - do your own damn washing if its that important!

sellidionne − I didnt even finish reading this, YTA and I'm not sure why that isn't obvious.

Your wife is not your maid or your mother. If the slacks were that important, you should have double checked or, better yet, packed your bag yourself.

A common theme in the responses was the importance of taking responsibility for personal items, especially for professional travel.

[Reddit User] − Typos found. Please fix them wife mom, 31M 13 M YTA dude wtf

[Reddit User] − YTA. You handed your wife the shirts but put the slacks in the dirty laundry.

She could have washed all of it together if you had given her everything.

Also, YOU should be packing your own s__t. Stop blaming your wife for your own failures to plan.

Why would you decide to go on a work trip at the last minute causing a late night run to WalMart for clothes? Your failure to plan is not your...

RoyalEagle0408 − Sometimes I read the title and form an opinion and am proven wrong by the actual post.

This was not one of those times… YTA and your wife deserves an apology and probably a better husband.

BusinessForeign7052 − So you put the clothes you wanted washed on the bed... put the slacks in the laundry basket...

didn't tell her you did that... then you got mad at her when she didn't know they were in there?

Sir... is this a joke? Also as others have said.... she is your wife, not your mother. YTA

The forgotten slacks were a symptom of something larger: the expectations partners place on each other during stressful moments. She tried to help. He assumed the result. Both walked away feeling wronged.

Their argument asks a familiar question in relationships: When does helping turn into responsibility, and when does frustration turn into blame?

Was his reaction reasonable, or should he have checked his own bag before leaving? How would you manage shared duties under pressure?

Charles Butler

Charles Butler

Hey there, fellow spotlight seekers! As the PIC of our social issues beat—and a guy who's dived headfirst into journalism and media studies—I'm obsessed with unpacking how we chase thrills, swap stories, and tangle with the big, messy debates of inequality, justice, and resilience, whether on screens or over drinks in a dive bar. Life's an endless, twisty reel, so I love spotlighting its rawest edges in words. Growing up on early internet forums and endless news scrolls, I'm forever blending my inner fact-hoarder with the restless wanderer itching to uncover every hidden corner of the world.

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