Ex-Boyfriend Obsessed With Being Smarter Gets Crushed by PhD Student

There is nothing more satisfying than watching an insecure person try to prove their superiority, only to be instantly, effortlessly humbled.

This Redditor was dating a man who had a massive chip on his shoulder about her being in a PhD program. He was obsessed with intellectual gatekeeping and constantly trying to “bring her down a peg.”

When he saw her playing Sudoku, he assumed he was better. He insisted she try his “hard” app.

She complied, and the resulting humiliation was so complete, the ex spent months trying to recover his dignity.

Now, read the full story:

This is the kind of petty revenge that deserves a standing ovation. The ex-boyfriend wasn’t just trying to share a game; he was trying to assert intellectual dominance over a woman he already felt inferior to.

The OP’s quiet, devastating competence completely dismantled his fragile ego. She didn’t need to argue or explain her PhD; she just needed to solve a puzzle in a minute flat.

The fact that he stewed for months and then tried to sneak a win on the easiest setting only to be crushed again is the perfect cherry on top of this delicious revenge sundae.

The ex-boyfriend’s behavior is a textbook example of intellectual insecurity, often manifesting as gatekeeping. He felt threatened by the OP’s academic success and tried to find a small, controllable arena (like a Sudoku app) where he could prove his superiority.

As relationship psychologist Dr. Sarah C. Johnson noted in Psychology Today,

“When a partner constantly tries to diminish your achievements or intellectual competence, it’s rarely about you; it’s a projection of their own deep-seated insecurity. This behavior, often called intellectual gatekeeping, is a way for them to maintain a perceived power dynamic.” 

Furthermore, the ex’s confidence in his own ability, despite being easily beaten, aligns perfectly with the Dunning-Kruger effect. A study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that individuals who score lowest on tests of logic and grammar often overestimate their performance by as much as 50%.  

The ex-boyfriend was so convinced of his own intelligence that he couldn’t comprehend the OP’s skill, dismissing her initial win as “luck.” The OP’s final act of crushing his easiest score was a necessary, final lesson that his insecurity was no match for her quiet, trained competence.

Check out how the community responded:

Redditors were united in their satisfaction, celebrating the OP’s petty revenge and calling out the ex-boyfriend’s toxic behavior.

Several users shared similar stories of insecure partners or friends who couldn’t handle being beaten at a game, highlighting the ex’s fragile ego.

A few commenters offered lengthy, entertaining analogies about the satisfaction of defeating an arrogant opponent.

Other Redditors offered general observations on the ex-boyfriend’s exhausting need for validation.

How to Navigate a Situation Like This

It’s exhausting to be in a relationship (or even a friendship) with someone who is constantly competing with you. If you’re dating someone with a clear inferiority complex, it’s not your job to “fix” them. You can’t shrink yourself to make them feel big.

If the relationship is worth saving, you can try to offer reassurance. But often, as in this story, the insecurity runs too deep. The OP handled it perfectly. She didn’t engage with his academic insecurities, which would have been a losing battle.

Instead, she accepted his challenge in a totally different arena, one he chose, and proved her point. She didn’t have to argue or defend her intelligence. She just… was intelligent. And it drove him nuts. Sometimes, the best revenge is just to be good at Sudoku.

The OP proved that true intelligence doesn’t need to be loud or boastful; sometimes, it just needs a minute and a half to solve a puzzle that someone else thought was “hard.” The ex-boyfriend learned a very public, very humiliating lesson about intellectual humility.

Have you ever had to deal with someone who constantly tried to prove they were smarter than you? What was your best moment of quiet competence?