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Girlfriend Says Boyfriend Is “Heartless” For Not Leaving Lab Quiz Immediately During Her Period Emergency

by Marry Anna
November 14, 2025
in Social Issues

College relationships often collide with academic pressure in ways no one expects. One partner juggles heavy coursework, strict professors, and high-stakes exams, while the other may be dealing with physical pain or emotional stress that can’t be paused for a class schedule.

When those worlds collide, even well-meaning intentions can get lost in frustration. This story begins with a student trapped between a time-sensitive lab quiz and his girlfriend’s sudden medical discomfort.

What should have been a simple decision spiraled into accusations, tension, and a lingering silence.

Girlfriend Says Boyfriend Is “Heartless” For Not Leaving Lab Quiz Immediately During Her Period Emergency
Not the actual photo

'AITA for not taking her home immediately after period mishap?'

I was in a two-hour lab, and my gf messaged me. She said she's in a ton of pain. Her period started, and she doesn't have tampons/pads or Advil.

She said she can't drive home; it hurts that badly, so she's going to skip class, and I need to take her home. She was waiting at my car.

I messaged my friends and they said they were good to record class for me.

Some of my classes don't give PowerPoints, purposely, so you have to go. But they said they got me and would record the lectures.

The two-hour lab I was in was trickier, though. I have a quiz each lab halfway through that is 20 minutes long, and these quizzes are 40% of our grade.

He also does not do remakes, no exceptions. So I can't miss. It would be 5 points clean off my grade, and I need an A in the class.

I take my grades really seriously because I want to go to medical school. I wouldn't miss that lab if my house were on fire, lol.

Missing the rest of the lab would suck, too. My friends said they'd record it, but unlike my lectures, our lab is completely visual, so a recording is useless.

But I decided I'd skip for her anyway and just bug my friends/TA to teach me the material I missed.

I told her I'd be 30 minutes for me to take the quiz, and then I'd skip the rest of the lab.

But she said, "Wow, so your grades are more important than me and my health?" I said it's not more important, but it is important.

I said she could go to the bookie at our school and buy Advil. She was close by because I parked my car in the garage of that building, but...

Plus, she said she's literally bleeding through her clothes and has no tampons. It would be embarrassing, and I'm wrong for making her wait.

I said all the bathrooms on campus have free tampons. I told her to go grab one from any of the bathrooms, but she said again she can't move, she's...

At this point, I'm not really sure what to do. But I'm already missing my classes and the rest of the lab for her, which I never do, so she...

I told her it's not far at all, only like a couple of minutes' walk to the elevator, but I'd buy her tampons/Advil from the bookstore if she waited for...

She said holy f__k, I don't have a choice. I guess I'm waiting, but you are being such an a__hole right now. You care about your grade more than you...

I was like Oh my god, lol. I was frustrated and said, "You have your period at the same time each month. Why didn't you bring tampons/Advil? This isn't a...

Which resulted in her getting upset, I was making it her fault, and she called me sexist and said I have no idea what it's like for her. I agreed...

I took the quiz and ended up meeting her at my car 20 minutes later with Advil, tampons, and water.

But she is not happy. She has been ignoring me since and keeps making passive-aggressive comments.

AITA here? Should I have skipped the quiz?

This scenario illustrates the challenges couples face when navigating physical health needs alongside individual priorities and commitments.

The girlfriend experienced severe menstrual pain and lacked necessary supplies, creating a legitimate medical and emotional concern.

At the same time, the boyfriend was faced with a high-stakes academic responsibility, a lab quiz worth a significant portion of his grade, which he cannot afford to miss.

The tension emerges from balancing empathy, logistical limitations, and personal obligations.

Research in health psychology emphasizes that menstrual pain can significantly impair mobility, concentration, and emotional well-being.

According to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG), severe menstrual pain (dysmenorrhea) may require rest and symptomatic relief, and it can have substantial short-term impacts on daily functioning.

Ignoring or minimizing such pain can exacerbate distress and strain relationships.

Communication and expectation management are key. According to the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, couples experience conflict when one partner perceives the other as prioritizing obligations over their immediate health needs.

Clear communication, shared problem-solving, and preemptive planning reduce tension and promote mutual understanding.

Clinical psychologist Dr. Laura Markham notes: “Acknowledging a partner’s physical discomfort, especially when it’s acute or disabling, is critical. Empathy and timely support strengthen relational trust.”

In this situation, the boyfriend ultimately attempted to balance both priorities by completing his quiz while arranging for his girlfriend’s needs, demonstrating compromise and responsiveness.

A constructive approach might include planning ahead for recurring situations, ensuring quick access to necessary supplies, and creating contingency strategies for time-sensitive obligations.

See what others had to share with OP:

This entire group emphasized that managing menstruation is a basic responsibility, not something to outsource to a partner—especially during class hours or exams.

[Reddit User] − A lack of planning on her part now constitutes an emergency on your part?

C'mon. If she told me she couldn't wait 20 minutes, I'd have responded that I was sorry to hear that and to let me know how she resolved her problem...

Your GF has to manage her period.

It's an unfortunate fact of life that periods can be painful, inconvenient, messy, and even from Hell sometimes.

But everybody with one needs a system for managing independently, unless they are a chronological child.

NTA. I have had a period since before the fourth grade, and I am just not able to accept a person who needs my intervention to manage the crisis of...

She couldn't walk to a tampon station? She couldn't ask a friend to bring her one?

She needed you to leave a class that will penalize you for the absence to manage something that just keeps coming back, and she's well familiar with.

C'mon. I have fainted from period pain and had dry heaves and the whole m__strous ordeal that menses creates for me personally.

But no one else is to blame for my horrible periods or any lack of planning that leaves me unprepared to manage.

She's not 9. This isn't about sexism. This is about her managing a recurring biological function.

Icy_Blueness1206 − NTA. I presume this is college, but even in high school, women learn to carry period supplies even if their period isn’t imminent because some other woman might...

Were there no other women in her class? Does she have no other friends she could call?

If she were in that much distress, I think a professor would have readily excused someone to accompany her to the campus health center or nurse.

I can hardly believe your GF is real. I’ve never met a single woman who didn’t have a period contingency plan that wasn’t based on her BF coming to her...

They shared personal experiences with debilitating cycles yet still stressed independence, preparation, and problem-solving.

CrimsonKnight_004 − NTA. Look, she’s responsible for her own period. Is it possible to forget tampons/pads?

Yeah, it happens, and that’s why the free tampons in the restroom exist. She should’ve walked herself there to get some.

She’s an adult and needs to be able to help herself, not expect you to drop your classes at the second she says so. I’m a woman.

I have bad periods, sometimes debilitating ones. But it’s still my responsibility to manage them.

Princess-She-ra − NTA. As a woman who had mostly predictable but sometimes unpredictable periods, you always carry at least one "set" with you (tampon, pad, cup, whatever you use).

And I've had really heavy periods at times - but that's not anyone else's responsibility, it's mine.

I would suggest that she see her doctor if the period is so debilitating that she can't walk a few minutes or wait thirty minutes for help.

Janellewpg − NTA. What would she have done if she were single? I say this as a female with awful monthlies.

It was her fault for not being prepared. Your quiz was more important.

kathryn_sedai − NTA as someone menstruating right now. It’s on her to plan, and while it’s unfortunate she was caught short, the idea that she couldn’t go get a free...

She’s at school-there has at least one other person in immediate proximity to her who could have helped her.

It feels like a power play to her. She should not be asking you to tank your grades for period cramps.

thegreymoon − NTA. This is ridiculous, and I say this as a woman who has been having periods for 27 years.

Let me give you a piece of advice as an old lady: any partner who jeopardizes your job (or in your current case, your grades) over petty, manipulative b__lshit is...

She is self-centered, selfish, and immature. This is just one of many stupid stunts she'll pull.

If you really love her and don't want to break up (though I'd personally dump her over this nonsense), start setting some boundaries. You'll need them.

These commenters pointed out that she had energy to walk to OP’s car, yet somehow couldn’t walk to a bathroom, health center, campus nurse, or even reach out to friends.

SnooPets8873 − NTA, this is absolutely ridiculous behavior on her part.

She made it from wherever she was to your car when she should have used that energy to get the tampons and pain pills that she actually needed.

I think you need to set better expectations about priorities. When you are on campus, it’s not a social event.

You need to be attending classes, and you aren’t there as a couple. If she needs to leave, that’s fine, but she is an adult and should find her way...

This shouldn’t be your responsibility, and if you’ve set expectations that it is, it’s past time you corrected that.

Boring-Pudding − NTA. You are a student. Your grades are extremely important. A grown woman can find another ride.

It isn't your responsibility to drop your life to cater to her here. She could have gone to the health center.

They'd have had medicine, tampons, and something she could have covered up with/changed into if she was bleeding through her clothes.

mecistops − I've been surprised by my period any number of times and have pain so extreme I've literally taught myself how to test for appendicitis (rebound pain) to make...

And I'm perfectly capable of making an impromptu pad out of toilet paper to protect my clothes and lying down somewhere to cry while I wait for someone to be...

NTA except for the bit where you told her she should have been prepared because periods are occasionally irregular and people do get caught out, there's no reason to be...

Ok_Conversation9750 − NTA. 'You have your period at the same time each month. Why didn't you bring tampons/Advil? This isn't a surprise.'

You pointed out that she doesn't plan. What if you'd been completely unavailable? Bet she would have found a solution.

julianradish − NTA. A period can be super painful, and it sucks, but it's not a true medical emergency.

I once had my friend text me while I was in class that they needed to go to the hospital psych ward.

I said I can drive you after my class is done in 1 hour, and that was fine. It's not like she's going to die from a period.

Commenters here focused on the stakes: a 40% quiz with no retakes.

IamIrene − But she said, "Wow, so your grades are more important than me and my health?"

Wow, she can't call an Uber? Wow, she doesn't carry tampons/Motrin? Wow, she doesn't know periods happen every month, and she isn't prepared?

And this is somehow your problem? Wow. NTA.

Proof_Option1386 − NTA, it is her fault. You aren't sexist.

She is an adult and should be taking responsibility for herself, not attempting to guilt you into making her body and her oversights your responsibility.

It's also incredibly callous and entitled that she puts her discomfort over your academics.

She sounds like an extremely toxic and (no pun intended) histrionic person. Is this really someone you want to be with?

Significant-Dig-8099 − NTA. I am a female with endometriosis. It's extremely painful and can catch me at any time, as it's inconsistent.

I always have painkillers and sanitary towels with me. And I would never expect another to drop anything that they are doing, let alone an exam/test, to drive me home.

Your gf is unreasonable and extremely rude. Granted, she has PMS, but her expectations of you are extremely selfish. NTA.

This whole argument spiraled because both people were stuck between urgent needs, hers was physical, his was academic, and neither felt fully understood in the moment.

The OP did try to juggle a high-stakes quiz with a girlfriend in real pain, but frustration and timing turned the conversation sharp fast. Some readers will say he did everything he reasonably could; others will argue empathy should’ve outweighed the quiz.

Do you think he should’ve rushed to her immediately, or was a 20-minute wait fair under the circumstances? Drop your take below!

Marry Anna

Marry Anna

Hello, lovely readers! I’m Marry Anna, a writer at Dailyhighlight.com. As a woman over 30, I bring my curiosity and a background in Creative Writing to every piece I create. My mission is to spark joy and thought through stories, whether I’m covering quirky food trends, diving into self-care routines, or unpacking the beauty of human connections. From articles on sustainable living to heartfelt takes on modern relationships, I love adding a warm, relatable voice to my work. Outside of writing, I’m probably hunting for vintage treasures, enjoying a glass of red wine, or hiking with my dog under the open sky.

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