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Dad-to-Be Dreams of Private Jets While His Pregnant Wife Fears Early Labor

by Charles Butler
December 30, 2025
in Social Issues

We have all seen those romantic comedies where the hero arrives at the hospital just in time, breathless and covered in confetti. In real life, however, those moments feel a lot less like a movie and a lot more like a high-stakes logistics puzzle. One Redditor recently shared her story about the nerve-wracking countdown to her first child’s arrival. After a long and difficult journey with infertility, she finally has her miracle baby on the way.

There is just one little problem with the timing. Her husband is the best man in a wedding that takes place only a few days after her due date. While he sees a chance for a fun celebration, she sees a world of “what-ifs.” This situation has sparked a gentle debate about what it means to be a supportive partner during life’s most unpredictable transitions.

It is a story that explores boundaries, priority shifts, and the simple need to be heard.

The Story

Dad-to-Be Dreams of Private Jets While His Pregnant Wife Fears Early Labor
Not the actual photo

AITA for Making My Husband Miss His Best Friend's Wedding?

I (37F) and my husband (32M) expect our first child in the next few months. It has taken us a long time to get here,

as I struggled with infertility issues so while the pregnancy was wanted, it was a surprise when it occured.

My due date falls a week before my husband's best friends wedding, two hours away from where we live. My husband is the best man.

When I mentioned to my husband he likely couldn't attend, he didn't seem to understand. I told him how it was still too far out

to know, but there was a real possibility I would be waiting for labor to begin, in active labor or just getting home at this time.

I told him I didn't feel comfortable with him being that far away in any of those situations, but he seemed to take it as a joke.

He has made comments about getting a "private jet" back if I go into labor that day or just sending his mom over

to help me if I am a few days post partum. I understand this is an important event to him, but with the unknown

I am not comfortable confirming he can go at this point and I am looking for reassurance he understands that.

I understand I could likely go into labor early, giving a long enough window I would feel more comfortable with him leaving me

for a period of time (8-ish hours, returning back and not staying over), but that's the only situation I see that is possible for him to attend.

Clarity: I am not trying to say he can't go 100%. I am asking him to understand there are very real situations

that mean he may not be able to go whether the baby is here or not. Pregnancy complications would void the idea he could go

if the baby is here. Doctor saying "baby is coming any day" or "you are high risk" would void him being able to go if baby isn't here.

No signs of labor on that day, early delivery where I would be home and settled for a week-ish with other support completely okay!

It just seems like I am being forced to shoulder the burden and the anxiety of a very complicated situation vs. have my

feeling validated that we may not know what's going to happen now but there needs to be a real, yet flexible plan..

Clarification: The wedding is 5 days AFTER my due date and FTM usually go longer than 40 weeks. Response: I think all the comments

here are helping me get to my perspective and I've selected poor language in my OP- it's not really the logistics here for me

of if it should be two days before he can go, our two days after. It's the willingness and emotional support to figure out

the best plan. Do I think my needs are higher than his best friend's yes. But i understand reading these comments that that also

may minimize my husband's needs. This might make me sound like more of TA but I am just looking for reassurance that he understands

and wants to prioritize me especially if there are ways I can still see it working. I agree I should not have come at

it from a place of "no" that was dictacted by fear and trying to control the unknown which is my responsiblility.

Oh, friend, my heart truly goes out to this sweet mother-to-be. After struggling with infertility, every tiny detail of the pregnancy likely feels extra significant. It is so easy to see why she is looking for a soft place to land.

When your husband makes jokes about private jets during such a sensitive time, it can feel like your worries are being tossed aside. It is truly less about the miles and more about the emotional reassurance. Everyone wants to know that their partner is fully in their corner as they head into a major life change. It is helpful to see how deep the need for security goes in a marriage.

Expert Opinion

Navigating a major event like a wedding so close to a due date can trigger significant “transitional anxiety” for both parents. While the father might feel a push to hold onto his old social life, the mother is often deep in a stage called matrescence. This is a time when her entire focus shifts toward the safety and arrival of the little one.

According to a report from The Gottman Institute, the success of a relationship often depends on how partners respond to “bids for connection.” When the wife shares her fear, she is making a bid for support. If the husband jokes about it, he might unintentionally be “turning away” from her emotional needs. This can lead to a feeling of loneliness during a time that should be shared.

Statistically, birth is rarely a punctual event. Data from organizations like the March of Dimes shows that while most babies arrive within a few weeks of their due date, only about 5% of babies actually arrive on the specific day. This leaves a large window where anything can happen. A first-time mother often faces a longer labor process, yet complications can arise that require immediate presence.

The experts at Psychology Today suggest that clear, “if-then” planning can reduce stress. It is not about controlling every second. Instead, it is about creating a shared vision for the worst-case and best-case scenarios.

In this story, the husband’s lack of a serious plan might be a way for him to cope with his own nerves about becoming a dad. However, for a partner who is physically carrying the child, that lack of structure can feel like a heavy burden. True support looks like acknowledging the complexity together rather than brushing it off with a laugh.

Community Opinions

Netizens offered a wide range of gentle advice, with many suggesting that a middle ground is the best path forward for this new family.

Many readers believe that it is still a bit early to make a final, rigid decision.

[Reddit User] − NAH. But I don’t think you need to make a decision now. If you are in labour on the day of the wedding then obviously he shouldn’t...

But if you are more than a couple days PP, or still waiting for labour, then maybe let him go.

Everythingn0w − My friends were in this exact same situation and her husband didn’t want to go to the wedding but she urged him to.

If you start contractions he can come back, normally you don’t give birth within 2 hours of the start of contractions.

Why can’t he just confirm that he’s going and closer to the date if needed call it off?

A few neighbors suggested that the husband should reconsider his high-stress role as the best man.

Maximum-Swan-1009 − I would have my husband plan to attend the wedding but decline to be best man, so they do not have to find a "fill-in" at the last...

Babies do not follow the schedule... By not being in the wedding party, your husband could attend the service but come home before the reception.

[Reddit User] − I’m amazed that there are people voting Y T A...

Committing to be a best man in a wedding when your wife is within days of her due date is dumb at best, shows a total lack of empathy at...

If husband had any sense he should tell his friend “ I would be honored to be your best man, but I can’t commit because of the potential timing of...

Some commenters felt that the husband’s dismissal of the situation was a little unfair to the mother’s peace of mind.

[Reddit User] − NTA If he wants to risk missing his childs birth thats on him. Even if the chance is small, its not ZERO.

Does his best friend know? Will he be able to leave the party if you went into labor? You are worried and he is basicly laughing at it.

icruiselife − I understand that this is an important event to him.

Unlike the birth of his first child which he is willing to pawn off on his mom so he doesn't miss his friend's wedding. Think about that.

Others shared helpful ideas for compromise and practical solutions.

[Reddit User] − My husband went 3 hours away to work while I was almost due - the deal was he wasn’t to drink

because if I went into labour he had to be able to drive home. Compromise.

CrabbiestAsp − NTA. I wouldn't be comfortable with my hubby being so far away at such an important time of our lives.

I also know his best friend would be a bit disappointed but would understand.

How to Navigate a Situation Like This

If you find yourself stuck between a social commitment and a medical deadline, the most important tool is “honest flexibility.” Start by sitting down during a quiet moment. Use a calm voice to explain that your request comes from a place of love and a desire for security.

It is very helpful to set milestones. For example, you could agree to check in with the doctor 48 hours before the event. If the doctor says “baby is coming,” then the plan shifts to staying home. If there are no signs of labor, the husband might attend with a clear “no-drinking” and “fast-return” rule. This helps both partners feel like they have some control over a very unpredictable time. Focus on the fact that you are a team working toward the same goal.

Conclusion

This family’s dilemma is such a relatable look at the growing pains of becoming a parent. While weddings are special milestones, the birth of a child is a life-altering transformation. Finding a way to respect both traditions and new beginnings is a delicate dance.

What is your take on this? Do you think the husband is being a bit too relaxed, or is the wife’s worry simply a natural part of being a new mom? We would love to hear how you handled a similar calendar crisis in your own life.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/0 votes | 0%

Charles Butler

Charles Butler

Hey there, fellow spotlight seekers! As the PIC of our social issues beat—and a guy who's dived headfirst into journalism and media studies—I'm obsessed with unpacking how we chase thrills, swap stories, and tangle with the big, messy debates of inequality, justice, and resilience, whether on screens or over drinks in a dive bar. Life's an endless, twisty reel, so I love spotlighting its rawest edges in words. Growing up on early internet forums and endless news scrolls, I'm forever blending my inner fact-hoarder with the restless wanderer itching to uncover every hidden corner of the world.

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