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Father Tells Son He’ll Inherit The Family Business, But Secretly Plans To Give It To Daughter-In-Law

by Leona Pham
March 25, 2026
in Social Issues

Parenting can sometimes feel like a never-ending battle, especially when your child grows up to be someone you can’t support. OP’s son Bob has been difficult to deal with for years, and despite trying to help him, OP’s frustrations grew.

When Bob married Beth and they started their family, OP gave him a job in the family business, hoping it would motivate him. However, over time, it became clear that Beth was the more competent and ambitious one.

Now, OP has a secret plan to pass the family business to Beth instead of Bob, even though Bob made sacrifices to stay and work for the company. But is OP doing the right thing, or is he being unfair to his son? Keep reading to see if OP’s actions are justified or if they’ve crossed a line.

After secretly setting up his daughter-in-law to take over his business, one father admits to deceiving his son for the future

Father Tells Son He’ll Inherit The Family Business, But Secretly Plans To Give It To Daughter-In-Law
not the actual photo

'AITA For screwing my son over in favor of his wife?'

My adult son "Bob" is a lazy, arrogant, entitled, abusive, know it all.

I tried to parent him but my wife always threatened to divorce me and take all the kids any time I "abused" him

(lecturing, grounding, taking away privileges) I know I'm not innocent in this, but Bob has turned out insufferable.

8 years ago Bob( then 26) married "Beth"(19). They had twins right away so I gave him a glorified "job" that he's still doing.

I gave Beth got an entry level position with a couple years later and she quickly worked her way up. She's indispensable now.

Three years ago I asked her to go to school to learn the technical side of the business. She's doing amazing and will even finish early.

Bob didn't want Beth to go to school, but I pressured and bribed to get him to accept.

I offered an extra allowance and told him that she could help him run the company after I pass.

I might be TA because I lied. I have zero intention of giving him the company. Bluntly, he's incompetent.

I've been grooming Beth in the background to succeed me. I'm secretly planning to retire in the next 5-6 years after Beth is established.

Bob gave up his dream job to stay and work here. which I know is bad. But he was expecting me to fund his "career", so am I still the...

Edit: To answer a couple of questions. 1. Bob wanted to be a music producer

2. I haven't directly told Beth that I will support her if she leaves, but y'all have convinced me I should

3. Yes, I've talked to a lawyer. A whole team of them. Legally, he's entitled to nothing. If he fights it, my lawyers are better than his mother's lawyers.

Family conflicts don’t start with a single event, they grow quietly over time, often rooted in longstanding patterns of behavior, expectations, and emotional shaping. What looks like a business dispute on the surface can actually be a reflection of deeper familial dynamics: who was supported, who was overlooked, and whose dreams were encouraged or dismissed.

In this Reddit story, the father’s choice to favor his daughter‑in‑law’s development over his son’s career isn’t just a business decision. It springs from decades of frustration, disappointment, and unmet emotional needs.

At its core, this situation shows the psychological weight of favoritism and unresolved expectations within families. The father admits Bob was “lazy, arrogant, entitled,” and that the marriage began when Bob was significantly older than Beth.

Because Bob’s behavior grated against him for years, the father chose to invest more in Beth’s growth, believing she was genuinely capable of leading the business.

Behind this choice lies a pattern many families face: when parents give more emotional investment and support to one child over another, it can shape how siblings see themselves and each other.

Research shows that perceived parental favoritism, whether real or interpreted, is strongly linked with tension, rivalry, and reduced emotional closeness among adult siblings.†

Psychology Today explains that when one child is treated with more warmth, trust, or higher expectations, it can create long‑lasting tension between siblings and continued resentment into adulthood. This isn’t just about objective differences in how parents behave, children internalize these perceptions early and carry them forward.

From a business standpoint, family firms face unique psychological and emotional challenges that extend far beyond professional competencies.

Family Business Encyclopedia notes that emotional issues and unresolved family roles often pose greater risks to family companies than market competition itself, because they shape communication, succession planning, and trust.

Even seasoned advisors emphasize that parental expectations combined with sibling rivalry must be acknowledged and addressed early, before they calcify into permanent estrangement or bitterness.

Understanding this helps us see why Bob may feel deeply wronged, even if his father believes his intentions are practical and justified. Being the less favored child, whether through competence, behavior, or emotional connection, can lead to diminished self‑worth, emotional distress, and long‑term rivalry.

It’s not just about business succession; it’s about identity, belonging, and fairness. And from Bob’s perspective, that promised future, one many kids are raised to expect when they work hard, was tied up in his father’s affection and validation.

When that promise was never real, the emotional impact goes beyond strategic planning and hits at the heart of how one child perceives their value in the family.

Check out how the community responded:

These commenters support OP’s decision to prioritize Beth’s competence over Bob’s laziness.

[Reddit User] − NTA Bob sounds painful. The wife should kick him to the curb and run the company herself lol

Kettlewise − NTA You’re not screwing your son over. And if he wasn’t going to have a dream job without your money, he didn’t have a dream job.

I mean yeah he’ll be f__king pissed because he sounds entitled and controlling - but ultimately Beth is more fit for the job.

She earned it. (I can’t believe he didn’t want her to go college. Good for you for not letting him get away with that s__t, even if it was from...

Pistalrose − NTA for favoring your DIL who is competent and a hard worker. But I think you’d be TA for planning this and keeping it secret.

Cause, while Bob seems like a n__ty piece of work, you’ve admitted to contributing to that to prioritize the life you wanted and it seems like you’re doing it again.

Telling your DIL now doesn’t decrease whatever affect cutting out Bob will have on their marriage.

It just buys you time to set up retirement if this is a make or break for your DIL following through. I think you should be honest.

DemonicAnjul − NTA. Are you still married to his mother? Because if you are, you and Beth both need to prepare for divorces in the future.

I have a sneaking suspicion that your wife is going to divorce you if you bypass your son for Beth. Please talk to Beth so she can make all these...

Help her find an awesome lawyer (maybe you guys can share, lol).

It might benefit her to be divorced BEFORE she takes over. It'll definitely be less stressful. Good luck!

Yellowsunflowerlover − NTA. Your wife is going to be pissed though, potentially divorcing you.

[Reddit User] − NTA, but I would advise locking up the company away from their marital assets as much as possible to protect your company.

Do everything you can do make sure he can’t have his hands on it if they divorce.

PenisEmbargo − NTA. This way you are making sure your grandkids will be taken care of regardless off lazy, selfish, abusive Bob.

Good move! And kudos for recognizing that your own kid is the problem and not blaming his wife for how he became

(I know people who say wife changed their precious little angel because before meeting her they were perfect. They were not. )

These commenters emphasize the importance of protecting Beth’s well-being from Bob’s toxic influence

PM_ME_YER_SHIBA_INUS − NTA. Bob is a controlling leech.

It's almost fitting that he gave up his "dream job" (which has been...where for the last 8 yrs? ) after trying to hold her own career back.

Make sure Beth herself knows everything well in advance, and is going to have time to plan and figure out how to handle this.

HowardProject − NTA - Given the info in your post and the additional information provided in comments,

Bob's dream job was daddy should fund his non-existent career as a music producer.

You didn't take anything away from him and he didn't give anything up because he didn't have it in the first place.

You did give him a job and his wife as well and you encouraged and promoted the person who made an effort and provided value to your business.

Beth is competent and hardworking and raising your grandchildren,

you did what you felt was necessary to help the family as a whole, and promoting Bob would ruin the family business.

You say you plan to retire and let Beth run the business, hopefully you also have a plan of succession when eventually you pass on.

It's not unusual for a family business to be forced into sale after the death of the original proprietor by partial inheritors demanding cash.

And in the case of Beth and Bob, if he is still a part of the business and depending on the state you live in -

it sounds like he could force the sale after your death simply by divorcing her and considering the business marital property...

Make sure you have a very good attorney for your estate-planning and pay close attention to the laws in your state on marriage and inheritance.

NedraProbably − NTA. At all. However, I hope you make sure to check in on the well-being of Beth and your grandchildren as this unfolds.

My dad’s father set up my mother and me as trustees for his estate over my father (for pretty good reasons, honestly), then told no one but Mom and me.

Dad only found out when the will was read, and I got to spend part of my last year in college grieving my grandpa

while Dad called me up regularly to rant about how he hoped Grandpa was burning in hell for setting up the trust.

You’ll presumably be the target for most of Bob’s rage, since you’re just retiring, but it could be awful for those kids for a while.

These commenters express concern about OP’s lack of transparency, which may cause family conflict and ask for more information

slightly2spooked − INFO: are you doing this for Beth or for your own satisfaction? It sounds like you really hate Bob (whatever, bet you have your reasons)

but you need to be careful that your petty revenge doesn’t land Beth in a tight spot,

especially since you don’t plan on being around when the bomb goes off.

If you really care about Beth, you’d best make sure your will is IRONCLAD. Absolutely no room for dispute.

INFO 2: you say Bob is abusive. What are you doing about that?

Giving Beth a job isn’t cutting it, you’re just making her even more dependent on her abusive husband’s family.

Get her out of harm’s way before you kick the bucket, or she’ll be the one Bob takes his anger out on.

natezane559 − Info. You have a lot of adjectives as to how your son is a bad person without any actual examples.

Your story is a little weak and sounds like you just don't like your son.

Some say OP was the jerk and even the son 

[Reddit User] − Going against the grain to say YTA. First, because you're still enabling Bob by giving him a well-paying job with no real work or accountability.

Second, because you have not had a direct conversation with Beth about your career aspirations for her and the related marital and financial implications.

And third, if you're still married to your wife (and either in a community property state or don't have a pre-nup),

she is likely entitled to a share of your company so you cannot just hand it over to Beth.

All of your machinations may be well-intentioned, but they're not really serving Bob or Beth.

You need to be transparent, make the hard decisions, and have the difficult conversations.

ericbsmith42 − YTA. Your son is probably an AH too, but you've lied to him and are stringing him along.

Tell him the truth and kick his ass to the curb, that's fine it sounds like he deserves it,

but by stringing him along you're enabling him in every possible way until the day you betray him and give the company to his wife.

See46 − Your son isn't the world's best person, but stringing him along leaves a bad taste in the mouth... ESH

The OP’s decision to bypass his son and give the business to Beth might seem like a betrayal, but it’s really a calculated move to secure the future of the company.

Is he wrong to put his business interests above family loyalty, or is he simply doing what’s necessary to ensure the company’s survival? What do you think? Should Bob have been given a chance to prove himself, or did his father make the right call? Share your thoughts below!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/0 votes | 0%

Leona Pham

Leona Pham

Hi, I'm Leona. I'm a writer for Daily Highlight and have had my work published in a variety of other media outlets. I'm also a New York-based author, and am always interested in new opportunities to share my work with the world. When I'm not writing, I enjoy spending time with my family and friends. Thanks for reading!

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