Mother Kicks PTSD Daughter Who Refuses Treatment but Demands Total Control

There are moments in life where love and patience are tested in ways no one expects. Original poster is facing one of those moments as she struggles to manage a deeply complicated relationship with her daughter.

Mental health challenges, refusal of help, and ongoing emotional strain have created a situation that feels impossible to navigate.

From the outside, everything may seem fine, but behind closed doors, things look very different. Now, OP is considering a drastic move that has left others shocked and concerned.

Scroll down to understand the full story and what pushed her to this point!

Parent considers kicking out adult daughter with mental health struggles

Sometimes the hardest part of parenting isn’t discipline, it’s knowing where support ends and self-protection begins.

In this situation, OP isn’t just dealing with a “difficult” child. She’s navigating a deeply complex mix of mental health struggles, boundary issues, and emotional exhaustion.

Her daughter’s PTSD and ADHD likely intensify emotional regulation problems, which can show up as control, volatility, and dependency, especially toward the parent she feels safest with.

That’s why others see a “sweet” version of her while OP experiences something entirely different. What looks like manipulation on the surface can sometimes be a form of distress expression, but that doesn’t make the behavior harmless.

Over time, being on the receiving end of threats, verbal attacks, and constant pressure can wear anyone down.

At the same time, OP’s instinct to consider drastic action, like asking her daughter to leave, doesn’t come from cruelty. It comes from burnout.

When every attempt to help is rejected, and the situation keeps escalating, people often reach for boundaries that feel final because nothing else has worked.

The idea that “the real world will teach her” reflects a hope that distance might create perspective. But it also carries risk, especially for someone already struggling with mental health.

From a psychological standpoint, experts note that individuals with PTSD and ADHD can experience heightened emotional reactivity, difficulty with impulse control, and resistance to treatment, particularly if they feel a loss of autonomy.

When support is offered in ways that feel controlling, even if well-intentioned, it can trigger pushback rather than cooperation. At the same time, consistent boundaries are essential, because without them, unhealthy dynamics can deepen.

That insight reframes the situation slightly. OP’s daughter isn’t just “refusing help”, she may also be reacting to how that help feels to her. But that doesn’t mean OP should tolerate ongoing emotional harm. Both things can be true at once.

Looking at it more broadly, the real issue isn’t simply whether to kick her out or not. It’s about creating a structure where support is conditional on responsibility.

The idea OP mentioned, giving her daughter a clear choice between accepting help (including therapy) or finding independence, moves in that direction. It shifts the dynamic from constant conflict to defined expectations.

This isn’t a situation with a clean answer. There’s love, frustration, fear, and exhaustion all tangled together.

But one thing is clear: support without boundaries can become enabling, and boundaries without support can feel like abandonment. Finding a middle ground between those two is where the real work begins.

Here’s what Redditors had to say:

These commenters are highly suspicious of OP “shady” refusal

This group believes OP boyfriend is a direct trigger for her daughter condition

This smaller group backs OP

It’s clear from OP’s post that they are caught in a difficult, emotional situation with their daughter.

Trying to balance compassion with the need for boundaries is challenging when dealing with someone who is struggling with mental health issues, especially when they resist therapy or medication.

While OP may feel that a tough love approach is the answer, the idea of kicking out a child, even an adult child, can be hard for others to comprehend, particularly when family members have differing views.

Given the context, OP is clearly trying to set a firm boundary, but it’s also clear that a thoughtful conversation and perhaps involving the grandparents’ support could be the middle ground.

Do you think OP’s idea of giving her an ultimatum is the right course of action, or might it push her further away?