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Woman Tells BIL To Book A Hotel After He Camped Out In Her Bathroom—Now She’s “Ableist”

by Annie Nguyen
July 22, 2025
in Social Issues

Imagine waking up at 4AM, urgently needing the bathroom—only to find your house guest already locked in for the next hour. That’s exactly what happened to one Redditor, and the outcome was, quite literally, messy. With just one bathroom in her two-bedroom home, she found herself navigating an unexpected standoff over toilet time.

When her sister and brother-in-law came to stay, things seemed fine at first—until the BIL started spending hours (yes, hours!) in the bathroom. After days of missed bathroom breaks, early morning emergencies, and one very unfortunate incident, the Redditor had enough. But when she asked them to leave, things exploded into accusations of “ableism.” Want to see how this bathroom battle played out? Read on.

Woman Tells BIL To Book A Hotel After He Camped Out In Her Bathroom—Now She’s “Ableist”

One woman’s frustration with her brother-in-law’s marathon bathroom sessions led to a heated demand for a hotel stay.

'Aita For Telling My Bil He Needs To Book A Hotel When He And My Sister Were Staying At My House?'

My sister and her husband live across the country and decided they wanted to come visit. I live in a 2 bedroom 1 bathroom and I set up a bed in my home office because they wanted to stay at my house. They had been here for 4 days. The bathroom has been a big problem. He spends hours in there.

After the first day, I talked to my sister about it. She says he has a condition where he needs the bathroom a lot. So I let it rest. On day 3, it was even worse. There was a time where I had to excuse myself to go to the store so I could use the bathroom twice because he wouldn’t leave.

The last day i woke up at 4am and had to use the bathroom very badly. I knocked on the door and he said he’d be out in a minute. I told him I really had to go. It took him an hour to get out.

The nearby store wasn’t open at that time and I had to do something I am not happy I had to do because I couldn’t wait. The next morning I told him he needs to get a hotel. I can’t be blocked from using the bathroom in my own home because he takes it hostage. I get he has a condition, but so do I.

And I make sure I have my own bathroom when I travel so I don’t get in the way of other people needing the bathroom. My sister and her BIL were very upset and called me ableist. I told them what I had to do last night because he was in the bathroom for so long and they said I could’ve held it.

I told them they need to leave and find a hotel or stay with other family, he just can’t stay here anymore. AITA for telling my sister and BIL they need to get a hotel when the plan was for them to stay with me for a week?

Bathroom space may seem trivial—until it’s not. For one Redditor, sharing her home with her sister and brother-in-law turned into a logistical and emotional nightmare. With only one bathroom, a guest hogging the space for literal hours at a time was more than inconvenient—it was humiliating.

Let’s be real: everyone deserves privacy and comfort, especially when dealing with medical conditions. But monopolizing someone else’s only bathroom, forcing them to leave their own home just to pee? That’s not a condition—it’s inconsideration. And the kicker? When confronted, the BIL and sister flipped the narrative and accused the host of being “ableist,” completely ignoring her needs in the process.

This isn’t just about one uncomfortable house guest. It’s about boundaries, respect, and the limitations of shared space. According to etiquette expert Lizzie Post, co-president of the Emily Post Institute, “Good guests think ahead about their needs and try to minimize disruption to their hosts.”. Clearly, the BIL didn’t get the memo.

It also raises questions about the difference between real medical issues and weaponizing them to avoid responsibility. If his condition is truly that serious, wouldn’t he want private accommodations—like a hotel with an en suite—where he could access the bathroom without inconveniencing anyone else?

This isn’t ableism. This is someone finally setting boundaries after suffering literal consequences—remember, the OP had to go to a store (twice!) just to relieve herself. And when that didn’t work, she was left with no choice but to do something “she wasn’t proud of.”

Ultimately, the Redditor did the right thing. No one should be made to feel like a stranger in their own home. And if setting limits makes you the villain in someone else’s story, maybe it’s time they booked their own chapter—somewhere else.

Internet users were flushed with opinions—and most weren’t kind to the BIL.

A few Redditors doubted the bathroom marathon was health-related. Instead, they suggested he was scrolling, avoiding responsibilities, or possibly dealing with something more serious.

pixie-ann − NTA how old are these two? How could they think that taking over the one bathroom for three people for hours each day would be okay? Is he actually suffering with a condition or does he take his phone to the loo with him?

personofpaper − NTA Multiple hours at a time for one bowel movement? For multiple days in a row? Does he have a job? I don't understand how someone could function in daily life if they require multiple hours long bathroom breaks. He would need to call ahead everywhere to check on the availability of bathrooms.

The number of bathrooms you have should've been his first and top priority when finding a place to stay. Or, he's an a**hole who is watching porn while you pee in the sink or whatever you did.

MagnetAccutron − Addicted to p**n. Tell him to book a hotel.

ScustyRupper − Shut off the Wi-Fi every time he heads to the loo.

Several commenters praised OP for taking action, especially given she only had one bathroom and had to leave her own house to use the toilet.

archetyping101 − NTA As someone with a digestive issue who should own stocks in toilet paper companies, this is actually why I stay in a hotel. I don't believe in staying anywhere that's a 1 bath in someone's home because no one should have to live through that.

The fact they don't recognize spending a solid hour in there at a time to the point you had to go to a store TWO TIMES is too much. They would be more comfortable in a hotel. I bet they just don't want to spend the money. You're not being ableist. You just happen to also need to use the washroom and short of pissing or shitting in a bucket or driving somewhere like a McDonald's, this isn't fair to you.

Mira_DFalco − NTA BIL needs a gastrointerologist.   And he needs to book a hotel,  or stay with someone who has more than one bathroom.   So not OK to be monopolizing the only facility,  & expecting everyone else to figure out somewhere else to go.

Finally, a few users dropped the social etiquette hammer.

BlondDee1970 − NTA. If someone needs to take up that much time in the bathroom they 100% should be getting their own accommodations so they have a private bathroom. Forcing you to go to the store is insane. If BIL really needs that much bathroom time (and not just scrolling) the sister never should have asked to stay knowing it’s a one bath house.

JustALizzyLife − If you're in the bathroom for literal hours without being able to leave, you need a better doctor. Not only is that not healthy, but sitting on the toilet that long can be dangerous. Speaking as someone with chronic diseases who needs the bathroom often.

There's needing the room often and then there's camping. He's camping. Bet he brings his phone in with him. I'm curious as to if he has an actual diagnosis or if this is just how he escapes responsibilities.

TDonBelle − IBS and Crohn‘s run rampant in my family and not a single one stays in the bathroom for that long. But you know who does stay in the bathroom that long? My druggie sister in law.

 

Electrical_Sample533 − I would be willing to bet his condition is he's an a**hole. Every person I've ever met that needed a bathroom frequently wanted their own bathroom so they never fear someone being in there.

This bathroom battle was more than a plumbing problem—it was a test of boundaries and basic respect. While family visits should bring connection, not conflict, the reality is that even love has limits. Should the Redditor have been more understanding—or was she right to finally flush the freeloading behavior for good?

What would you do if your house guest took over the only bathroom… every single day? Let us know where you’d draw the line in the comments!

Annie Nguyen

Annie Nguyen

Hi, I'm Annie Nguyen. I'm a freelance writer and editor for Daily Highlight with experience across lifestyle, wellness, and personal growth publications. Living in San Francisco gives me endless inspiration, from cozy coffee shop corners to weekend hikes along the coast. Thanks for reading!

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