Planning a wedding is stressful, but being a bridesmaid with a tight budget and shifting schedules can be its own kind of chaos. In this AITA tale, a 25-year-old bridesmaid finds herself at odds with a bride and maid of honor after booking a reasonable flight to attend a childhood friend’s Thanksgiving weekend wedding. She lives in Washington, the wedding is in California, and flights were getting pricey. So she booked one that would land before 11 a.m., thinking she was in the clear.
But just days later, the bride suddenly scheduled a 10 a.m. rehearsal breakfast an hour and a half away from the airport. The bridesmaid politely said she couldn’t make it and would join them at the venue afterward. Now the maid of honor is texting her that the bride is upset. A flight change would mean skipping Thanksgiving or shelling out over $125 in change fees, not to mention the higher fare.
Is this bridesmaid being inconsiderate for not rearranging her life and wallet? Or is the bride asking too much, too late? Let’s dive into the story behind this pre-wedding turbulence.
This Redditor’s story is bumpier than a turbulent flight! Here’s the original post:
When Plans Change Without Notice
Planning a wedding is chaotic enough, but when someone else’s last-minute decisions end up costing you, the pressure can hit hard. This bridesmaid thought she was doing everything right. She asked for the rehearsal schedule, waited as long as she could, then booked a flight from Washington to California that landed just before 11 a.m.
It was timed to give her plenty of room to arrive, help with setup, and still be part of the big weekend. Then, out of nowhere, the bride shifted gears and decided on a 10 a.m. rehearsal breakfast at her parents’ place, which is nowhere near the airport.
Suddenly, the flight no longer works, and the only alternatives are pricey changes or sacrificing Thanksgiving with her family. The maid of honor didn’t waste time laying on the guilt, making her feel like she’s failing the bride. But is that a fair call?
Setting Boundaries and Budget Limits
From the bride’s point of view, it probably feels like her vision is slipping through her fingers. Emotions run high in the final days, and she might be imagining her wedding day without one of her closest friends by her side at every moment. Still, it’s a big ask to expect someone to eat a $125 fee or more just to fix a plan that wasn’t communicated in time.
Bridesmaids already spend around $1,200 per wedding, and many aren’t financially ready to absorb even more costs. Our Redditor isn’t bailing on the event, she’s still arriving in time to help, but she’s not able to rearrange her entire holiday or blow her budget for a breakfast that came out of nowhere.
Dr. Bella DePaulo, a social psychologist, put it plainly in a recent interview: “Good communication and early planning are what keep friends from becoming resentful during wedding season.” In this case, it wasn’t the bridesmaid who dropped the ball. A better option might be offering to join the rehearsal via video call or simply showing up early to help wherever needed.
What do you think? Is it fair for her to stick with her original flight, or should she make the extra effort for the bride’s sake?
Reddit’s serving up takes spicier than a wedding toast gone wrong! Check out the top comments:
Most Redditors agreed she wasn’t in the wrong. They backed her early planning and called out the bride’s poor communication. Here’s what they said:
More Reddit Reactions: this wasn’t on the bridesmaid. The bride dropped the ball on planning, and now expects others to pay for it. If she wants the change, she should cover the cost.
![[Reddit User] − NTA. This is really poor planning on their part and they're expecting you to foot the bill. If they valued you being at the wedding, they'd just be happy you can make it when you can. This is them saying that you're a prop - not a person - in their special day.](https://dailyhighlight.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/07/44642-18.jpg "She Refused to Change Her Flight for a Surprise Rehearsal - Now the Bride’s Fuming")
More Support Rolls In: poor planning isn’t the bridesmaid’s fault. If the bride wants changes, she should cover the cost—or simply be grateful her friend’s coming at all.
![[Reddit User] − NTA, they shouldn't have waited this long. Tell them unless they're going to pay for the changing fees, you'll see them when you see them.](https://dailyhighlight.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/07/44642-29.jpg "She Refused to Change Her Flight for a Surprise Rehearsal - Now the Bride’s Fuming")
Are these Redditors on the right flight path or crashing the party? You decide!
This bridesmaid’s travel trouble shows just how messy wedding planning can get when communication falls apart. She booked her flight responsibly, asked for dates in advance, and planned to show up ready to help.
But when the bride dropped a surprise rehearsal breakfast with barely a week’s notice, she was suddenly cast as the inconsiderate one.
With the maid of honor applying pressure and the bride upset, the tension is rising faster than ticket prices. Was she selfish for not changing flight, or just practical in protecting her budget and family time?
What would you do if a last-minute wedding plan threatened to derail your Thanksgiving? Let us know below!
