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18 Year Old Loses Her Dream College After Parents Secretly Drain Her Inheritance

by Annie Nguyen
February 1, 2026
in Social Issues

Family expectations can quietly shape a person’s future long before they are old enough to question them. When money, rules, and favoritism get tangled together, resentment can build in ways no one expects. Many people grow up believing that if they do everything right, things will eventually work out. This story challenges that assumption in a painful way.

The original poster is an 18-year-old who believed her path to college was secure thanks to a family arrangement made years earlier. She followed every rule and stayed out of trouble, confident that her future was protected. That belief shattered when she learned where her college fund actually went.

What followed was an emotional confrontation that split her family apart. Now she is asking strangers online whether her reaction crossed a line or if her anger was justified. Keep reading to see how it all unfolded.

A teenage girl prepares for college, believing her grandmother’s inheritance will cover tuition until her parents reveal it’s gone

18 Year Old Loses Her Dream College After Parents Secretly Drain Her Inheritance
not actual the photo

'AITA for telling my parents they made my sister getting pregnant ruin my life?'

shes 23f im 18F. Grandma died 8 years ago, and she left more than enough money to pay for all her grandkid's colleges

educations with a few stipulations: dont get arrested, do drugs, be a drunk, get pregnant / get someone else pregnant.

The money was put into accounts in the parents names since we were all kids then.

In sophomore year my sister got pregnant. S__t hit the fan panicking about college, the baby daddy left & she hasnt tried

to find him/get child support, & the stress from that caused a hard complicated pregnancy. both are ok.

Mom * dad still let her go to college as long as she didnt have another and maintained a 3.5 gpa. which she did.

She graduated last December with about 2 grand in debt, I figured her money must have been used to help raise

her kid and pay for her pregnancy the past 2.5 years so she had to get a bit of a loan. which seemed understandable.

Boy I was wrong! I got accepted to my dream college on the other side of the state, but mom kept trying to get me to go to a cheaper

one near home so I dont need a dorm and it would be a cheaper school.

I asked her why she was so insistent, grandma left plenty of money i thought.

Turns out, they flushed all the money that was supposed to go to me down the toilet to take care of my sister & her kid & her expensive pregnancy,...

I broke down and just lost it crying harder than I ever have. Shouting how they fucked me over and ruined my life for the kid that fucked up.

now I'll have at least 70k debt if I go to school. I guess this upset my sister and she asked in a very upset tone

if id rather her be out on the streets destitute and unable to care for her kid(who she 'reminded' me was a living being)

because she didnt have an education/support system just so I could go on to college and have a good life.

I said yes, how its not fair that she got to f__k up, get drunk and sleep with so many guys she doesnt know who the baby daddy is

(something she told me but apparently not mom or dad), kept breaking rule after rule while I havent ever even had s__ with my bf.

And now Im the one that has to be punished for it. everything just keep devolving in to more yelling/fighting until I left.

Ive been staying with my bf for the past few days. I know with the rona i shouldnt gp anywhere but i just wanted

to be with the one person i feel like actually gives a damn about me. moms been texting/calling trying to get me to come home,

saying if i can just be reasonable and not vilify my sister we can probably work something out.

I told her unless she has money grandma left for me dont talk to me until I have my college loans paid off in 50 years.

Did I go too far? A lot of it was driven by emotion but i really feel fucked over here and like im being punished despite

being the one that followed the rules. I've since slept with my bf, i figure if Im getting punished same as

if i would have broken all the rules i can at least have fun 3000 char limit is an AH

EDIT: been texting sis some this morning to try and mend stuff with her since i didnt think mom and dad spending the money was her fault.

she was told about it after she graduated and was asked to keep me in the dark.

She has offered to pay for 'a book or two' but not more since she wants to move out to 'get out from under mom and dad's thumb'.

probably to party again since she doesnt hide how much she misses it.

edit 2: there was a bit left after sis got done at college and was told about it all.

They decide to use it to get her a car so she'd be able to get to work. and she went along with it. now im pissed at all 3...

EDIT 3: emailed my copy of the will to the laywer. he says due to how it was set up he cant be certain right now

we have a case but theres a good shot.bEDIT 4: lawyer says they may have violated the trust grandma set up

so hes contacting a trust lawyer friend of his to help make sure hes reading it all right

edit 5:(holy s__t so many edits sorry!) auntie got back to me. Shes mad at my parents.

when she called to see what was going on all they did was (her words) try to justify it.

Turns out dad and mom offered to pay for an a__rtion and sis didnt want one(understandable i wouldnt ether

but still dont always get what we want). and sis thought going on government assistance was trashy and refused.

so mom and dad felt like this was the only way to keep her 'safe'.

She says they still arent sorry and mom said shed do it again if she had to do it all over.

and of course as you might imagine they're mad at me for telling people.

But since its just making others mad at the mim just laughing at this point.

This family drama isn’t just a messy inheritance dispute; it’s a vivid example of how unequal treatment within families can ripple far beyond money and into mental health and lifelong relationships.

At its core, the OP’s resentment stems from a perceived imbalance in how her parents allocated resources and emotional support. That kind of imbalance isn’t unique; psychologists and family therapists have long studied the effects of parental favoritism and differential treatment.

When a parent or caregiver appears to favor one child over another, children are surprisingly attuned to those signals, even when adults think they’re being subtle or justified.

According to family experts interviewed by BetterHelp, children notice favoritism early, sometimes far earlier than parents realize, and it can leave deep emotional scars. Favoritism may start unintentionally for example, when one child has more pressing needs but this does not make its impact any less real.

Feeling left out or treated as “less deserving” often leads children to believe they are unloved or unworthy, which can contribute to long-term issues like anger, anxiety, or low self-esteem.

In the OP’s situation, the redistribution of her college funds, even if intended to help her sister, clearly crossed into that territory. Rather than transparent communication or shared decision-making, the unilateral move created an emotional perception of favoritism that now defines this family’s fractures.

Research further supports how perceived unequal treatment can influence psychological well-being across a lifespan. A long-term study discussed by BetterHelp explains that when parents take sides in disputes or treat one child differently, siblings report increased tension and feelings of being unfairly judged or misunderstood.

In extreme cases, resentment can lead to estrangement, where siblings struggle to rebuild closeness even years later.

What makes this story especially poignant is that the OP’s reaction anger, crying, fleeing to a partner isn’t just “drama.” It reflects a common emotional response described by therapists when a person’s trust in their caregivers has been violated: a mix of grief for the lost future they expected and shock at the reality they weren’t prepared for.

So what could have been done differently? Family dynamics experts often highlight the importance of clear communication, shared financial planning, and acknowledging all children’s needs before acting.

In cases involving wills or trust funds with stipulations, honoring those legal and emotional agreements isn’t just about money; it’s about respect and predictability. When families avoid these conversations, the emotional cost can far outweigh the financial one.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

These Redditors urged legal action, saying the parents misused funds and should be sued

Current-Read − NTA, i believe there is a legal advice subreddit?

Go there because if your grandmother left instructions for the money that was ignored by those holding it.

You can sue regardless of it being in your parents name.

teresajs − NTA You may be able to sue your parents to get that money back.

If Grandma's will was that specific about what the money could be used for, then your parents misappropriated your funds.

Your parents need to come up with that money. Also, make sure you're using birth control.

sdkjfoeijoenl − NTA - Threaten to sue them for the money. That sounds like fraud.

Your parents and sister should pay you back without it going to court and you should let them settle.

But if they don't your parents should cough up. They didn't even discuss it with you.

It is a terrible thing to steal from your own child and that is what they did. You aren't being over-dramatic. On the plus side.

You now know that you can't trust your parents with finances but you should talk to them about making practical arrangements to pay you back.

Also document this for your other siblings. Do they have any funds left?

Silver6Rules − F__k anyone who says the sister is not the a__hole.

She knew as well as you did that your parents were not well off, therefore the money had to come from SOMEWHERE.

and I see you said in a previous comment that they told her not to tell you. SHE KNEW.

That means they ALL intentionally screwed you, and people have the audacity to question your response?

Your sister as well as your parents made their choice. Now you get to make yours. Get your gotdamn money back.

NTA. P. S. : send yourself and this post IMMEDIATELY to r/legaladvice if you haven't already. I anxiously await any future update. Good Luck.

jmc259 − NTA OP, I saw on the comments that you were going to take the legal side and try to get your money back.

I 100% support that, as it was what I was going to say. Please, keep us updated.

This group agreed the parents unfairly sacrificed OP’s future to bail out the sister

[Reddit User] − NTA. You have every right to be upset. If that was a stipulation of your grandmother's money,

then your sister definitely should not have gotten the ride that she did.

Your parents should have done something out of their own money if they wanted to, but they should not have put your education

and livelihood in the mix. if you have any proof or anything that that is exactly what your grandmother wanted you to do,

and those are the stipulations on getting said money, then I can get that proof and I start figuring out if you're going to take legal action.

I wouldn't have any idea where to start, but your parents most definitely screwed you over and are definitely assholes.

sharksarentsobad − Single mom who's recently gone back to school here. Everything about your post has made my blood boil.

Everything. what your parents have done is wrong and your sister is honestly, not at all being a good parent either

(wonder where she gets that from). There are so many resources out there to help single parents like her.

And she didnt need to go to college right away. You have been let down by everyone here and I am appalled by that.

It was on your parents and sister to figure out a way for her to pay for school.

I stead, they stole from you and basically rewarded her for her bad life choices. NTA at all.

Zeeviii − NTA I don't understand how parents can do that.

Sure parents should always try to help their kids, but that's like, help with bc, a__rtion, adoption, or a way to get the kid money.

Even if they do give the kid money, the kid should be expected to pay back, and not just f__k off.

It should especially not give away or lend money that isn't theirs. They basically let off her scot-free and with a car?

I get she has a kid, but she also has to suffer the consequences of her actions. She will never learn.

These commenters emphasized the long-term damage and betrayal caused by stealing OP’s future

anormalfloridian − NTA. That was meant for you, not your sister. She really did ruin your life and your future.

GrowingApathetic1 − NTA. S__ew the people calling you the A__hole for getting mad.

If getting 80,000 stolen from you, for somebody else’s f__k up no less, isn’t a real reason to get angry than nothing is!

TheREALNesZapper − NTA, they really fucked over your entire future to protect their f__k up kid.

who probably is their favorite if they did all this lets be honest

This commenter focused on trust and legality, questioning how the parents accessed the funds

ReeveStodgers − NTA I'm surprised though that your parents didn't spend the last 6 years tempering your expectations about

what would happen to you post graduation. Why keep up the pretense that you would be getting anything?

They knew the money wouldn't be there. Also, funds like that are usually held in trust to be disbursed by the executor in accordance with the will.

I don't see how your parents got access prior to that date unless one of them was the executor or they lied to the executor.

Either way, that sounds criminal. (I'm not a lawyer, but this armchair is very comfortable. ) It sounds like they spent her money AND yours?

This group suggested loans or public aid as alternatives instead of stealing OP’s money

ThatGuy_Gary − NTA The worst part of this all to me is that she would have been covered by Medicaid if she applied!

They are very accommodating with pregnant women. Let me guess OP, is your family to proud to apply for welfare?

ajax_9000 − NTA: There are paths you could take to get the money back if you want.

The first- After discussing this with my brother who is a lawyer, he said you could sue your parents for the money depending on

what was said in your grandmas will regarding the use of the money. He does not advise this but it is a choice.

Another choice is get parent plus loans for college. The loans will be in your parents name/social so it is there liability.

This is obviously something to be discussed with your parents but it could be a decent solution given they used your education fund.

I would recommend you could pay back a small amount of the loan and they pay back most of it.

politicalinsensitive − NTA. They stole from you and lied, they didn’t even try to build the college fund back up.

They should’ve made your sister get a job and suffer the consequences of her actions like a real

adult instead of bailing her out with the money your grandmother left you.

She should’ve been the one to go to a school cheaper and close to home, not you.

Honestly I would ask them to take out private loans in their names so the debt isn’t directly linked to you and have them pay for your college.

This story struck a nerve because it taps into a universal fear: doing everything right and still losing. While many sympathized with the parents’ instinct to protect their struggling child, others couldn’t ignore the cost of that choice, especially when it was hidden until it was too late.

So where’s the line between helping one child survive and ensuring another doesn’t fall behind? Was this an unavoidable sacrifice or a preventable betrayal dressed up as family loyalty?

What would you have done and who should bear the consequences? Share your thoughts below.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 1/1 votes | 100%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 0/1 votes | 0%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/1 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 0/1 votes | 0%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/1 votes | 0%

Annie Nguyen

Annie Nguyen

Hi, I'm Annie Nguyen. I'm a freelance writer and editor for Daily Highlight with experience across lifestyle, wellness, and personal growth publications. Living in San Francisco gives me endless inspiration, from cozy coffee shop corners to weekend hikes along the coast. Thanks for reading!

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