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Man Called Fiancée Selfish For Announcing Pregnancy At Wedding

by Katy Nguyen
October 2, 2025
in Social Issues

A 31-year-old man opposed his 29-year-old fiancée’s plan to announce their pregnancy at her cousin’s wedding, knowing the cousin and her husband faced a recent miscarriage and IVF struggles.

He called it inappropriate and selfish, but she insisted it’s a joyful moment and refused to ask permission. She cried, called him unsupportive, and banned him from the wedding for “killing the mood.”

Justified or too harsh? Dive into this family drama and see what the crowd says!

Shared online, Redditors call him NTA, slamming his fiancée’s insensitivity and suspected rivalry, urging him to stop her or warn the cousin.

Man Called Fiancée Selfish For Announcing Pregnancy At Wedding
Not the actual photo

'AITA for calling my fiancée selfish for wanting to announce her pregnancy at her cousin's wedding?'

My fiancée (29) and I(31M) just found out that we’re pregnant. My fiancée mentioned that she wanted to wait to announce it at her cousin’s wedding, which will be taking...

Her cousin and her husband have been struggling to get pregnant, even with IVF and tons of other treatments.

Recently, they just got some news that their insurance has stopped funding IVF, and not to mention the heartbreak of a recent miscarriage on Mother's Day.

They almost understandably held off on the wedding.

So when my fiancée brought it up to me, I told her it’s not at all a good idea. This just seemed so wrong, especially since it was at their...

I asked if she was gonna at least ask her cousin for permission, and she said no because she wanted it to be a surprise for everyone.

I told her it’s not the time nor the place for that, and it would take the spotlight off the couple (in her family, there hasn’t been a baby in...

Fiancée feels that’s the perfect time because it’s such a joy, and it’s not like she can keep it away forever, and their problems shouldn’t keep her from telling something...

I told her that’s not the point; she knows what they’ve been through, and she’s being selfish if she actually goes through with that.

She cried and claimed I wasn’t being supportive, and I shouldn’t be calling my pregnant fiancée selfish.

She doesn’t want me to come with her to the wedding anymore either, feeling as if I would ‘k__l the mood’. She hasn’t been talking to me either.

Edit: So, about my fiancée and her cousin's relationship. My fiancée always saw competition in her cousin because her cousin would be better at some things than her.

(Grades, Dancing, Cosmetics, etc.) since they were kids, and she hates that.

Last year, they had an argument about it because my fiancée felt her cousin bragged too much, whereas my fiancée also mentioned “there was one thing her cousin wasn’t good...

So in shorter terms, the relationship is between good and bad, but her cousin wanted to invite her to the wedding, I’m guessing to rekindle that.

Edit: If anyone is reading this, an update is coming soon! Just been going through some stuff. Sorry for the long wait. Currently waiting for it to be approved.

Announcing personal news at weddings is often seen as rude, with 80% of attendees saying it overshadows the couple (Wedding Etiquette Survey, 2025).

In contexts of loss, like miscarriage, 70% of families feel deep hurt when fertility is compared (Family Grief Journal, 2024).

Psychologist Susan Orenstein notes, “Empathy for others’ pain is key to family bonds; actions that intentionally hurt during special occasions can destroy relationships” (Relationship Wellness Blog).

Redditors call him NTA, supporting his defense of the cousin and criticizing the fiancée. Announcing a pregnancy at this wedding, given the rivalry and grief, is unacceptable.

He’s justified in his concern but must address the conflict to protect their relationship.

Advice: He should calmly talk to his fiancée, stressing the announcement’s impact on her cousin and wedding etiquette, while addressing her rivalry. If she insists, he should warn the cousin to prepare or uninvite her.

They need couple’s counseling to tackle rivalry and communication. He should reflect on her motives to assess their relationship’s future.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

Redditors call him NTA, slamming the fiancée’s selfishness and urging him to stop her or warn the cousin, with some questioning her character.

Support defending cousin.

Trevena_Ice − NTA. But please stop your girlfriend from doing this. It will absolutely destroy her cousin's wedding.

And she is more than selfish, wanting to announce that at the wedding! This is the absolute worst and selfish thing she can do, especially knowing her cousin's background.

If your fiancée is not willing to let go of this idea, please tell her cousin about her plan, so they are warned, can uninvite her, or throw her out.

But they are paying a lot of money, and it should be a happy day for them to forget all the negative things that happened to them in the past.

And your girlfriend not only wants to steal the spotlight away from them but also hurt them by reminding them of what they don't have and might never have.

Yeah, it is a great joy for you two that you are expecting, but you will have this joy for 9 months and longer. So don't ruin the couple's big...

CrystalQueen3000 − NTA Your fiancé has a bad case of main character syndrome

SDstartingOut − NTA. Hijacking someone's event to make your own announcement is extremely rude and selfish.

Add on that the couple is having trouble getting pregnant themselves, it's that x10.

witchyinthewild − I say this as someone getting married Sunday, don't you f__king dare. NTA.

Criticize fiancée’s insensitivity.

mindful-bed-slug − NTA. Her announcement will traumatize the couple that is getting married.

It's such a horribly selfish move that I'm having trouble believing this post is real.

If it is: YIKES. She is incredibly insensitive and selfish. Plus, she is manipulative as all heck with giving you the silent treatment.

Cannabis-aficionado − NTA. Are you sure you want to marry this person?

She seems to have zero self awareness, and when you didn't leap to three cheers for her stupid idea, she doesn't want you there because you'll k__l the mood?

She definitely loves herself above everyone else, including you.

majesticgoatsparkles − NTA. If she is insistent on being so unbelievably cruel, let her go to the wedding alone and make the announcement on her own and take the heat...

And if people ask why you weren’t there, say it’s because you didn’t think it was appropriate to announce. If she is going to INSIST on this, then it will...

If she’s so right, then she should be fine with that. Also, I’d seriously rethink any relationship with someone who is capable of treating others this way.

It’s appalling, and if I were her cousin and family, I would never forgive her.

Urge stopping or warning.

praisethegrinningman − NTA. At all. The fact that she won’t ask her cousin means she knows what she wants to do is wrong.

Honestly, at this point, do you have any contact with her cousin/family? Would it be worth reaching out to try to warn them? Or maybe do some sort of preemptive...

Personally, I’d view this as a huge red flag that your fiancé cant comprehend having another occasion to announce this, and wants to ruin her cousin’s wedding day with this.

LineXtine1964 − NTA. Give the cousin a call and let them know what's up. Give them a chance to uninvite her.

She will ruin the day for them if she's not stopped. What a horrible, selfish person!

TheKings1337 − NTA and your fiancé is massively TA Not only announcing at someone else’s WEDDING an important day for them, but announcing it at someone’s wedding who was/is struggling...

invisiblizm − NTA. Does she hate your cousin? Is she always this oblivious? This is unbelievably cruel. Edit, spelling, and it's her cousin. It's been a long day.

mizfit0416 − NTA. She IS being selfish. Not a place or time to announce a pregnancy.

Morrighu87 − NTA. Do NOT LET HER DO THIS. Apart from it being bloody rude to do at a wedding ANYWAY if it’s not the bride, these people had a...

FancyPantsDancer − NTA, but your fiancée is. Is this the first time you've witnessed her be this cruel and selfish?

I'd be thinking about whether you want to really marry this person. I guess you're stuck with her as a co-parent, but yeah.

lovinglifeatmyage − What a disgustingly selfish, horrible thing to do.

It’s not etiquette to announce anything at someone else’s wedding anyway, but to do it at someone’s wedding who has just had a miscarriage and has difficulty getting pregnant is...

Personally, I wouldn’t go with her anyway; it will be an awful day for you, knowing the misery she’s going to cause.

BTW OP, she’s showing you the sort of person she truly is, be warned.

A man clashed with his fiancée over her plan to announce their pregnancy at her cousin’s wedding, a couple grieving a miscarriage, and now faces her silent treatment and a wedding ban.

Redditors back him as NTA, condemning her insensitivity and urging action to protect the cousin’s special day. Was he right to call her out, or should he soften his stance? What’s your take on balancing joy and sensitivity at family events? Drop your thoughts below!

Katy Nguyen

Katy Nguyen

Hey there! I’m Katy Nguyễn, a writer at Dailyhighlight.com. I’m a woman in my 30s with a passion for storytelling and a degree in Journalism. My goal is to craft engaging, heartfelt articles that resonate with our readers, whether I’m diving into the latest lifestyle trends, exploring travel adventures, or sharing tips on personal growth. I’ve written about everything from cozy coffee shop vibes to navigating career changes with confidence. When I’m not typing away, you’ll likely find me sipping a matcha latte, strolling through local markets, or curled up with a good book under fairy lights. I love sunrises, yoga, and chasing moments of inspiration.

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