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Tired Of Tech Gifts, Mom Rejects Birthday Present And Accuses Kids Of Not Listening

by Layla Bui
November 2, 2025
in Social Issues

Sometimes “good intentions” come wrapped in wires and frustration. For years, this parent begged their kids to stop buying them new tech for every holiday.

They didn’t want to update, sync, pair, or download; they just wanted peace. But when their latest birthday gift turned out to be yet another gadget, a shiny new tablet, they finally refused it outright.

What followed was an emotional argument about appreciation, boundaries, and what really makes a thoughtful gift.

For years, this parent politely accepted gadgets they never asked for, and this birthday, politeness ran out

Tired Of Tech Gifts, Mom Rejects Birthday Present And Accuses Kids Of Not Listening
not the actual photo

'AITA for not being grateful for a birthday gift and making it super clear that I don’t want this and clearly they can not listen?'

I am in my 50s and I am sick of getting technology for gifts.

My kids are all into tech, they always buy the newest stuff and for years

I have been trying to get it through their heads I don’t want it.

I will upgrade when I need to but I am so sick of relearning technology.

I work on the computer for work 8 hours a day and when I get home, I don’t want to mess around with tech to make it work.

Sometimes I also don’t want to be staring at a screen in my downtime.

My biggest pet peeve about this was them getting me something and then get annoyed if I ask for help setting stuff up.

I used to have a bunny TV and I don’t use cable or streaming platforms.

The tv worked fine and I was thinking of getting a Roku. They knew I wanted a Roku.

They got me the worlds most frustrating smart TV. Half the time, it won’t connect to the free TV networks.

I hate that TV, and it is in my basement. It’s a Samsung smart TV

I have made it so clear I don’t want tech. Christmas they got me new Bluetooth headphones.

I couldn’t get them to pair, it took my DIL an hour to make it work.

Whole time, everyone is pissed I asked for help.

So I really dislike getting tech, I asked for my birthday if they wanted to get me something, get me a book off a list or gift card.

I got a tablet, and they told me I can download book. I don’t want to read books on a damn screen.

This was my breaking point. I gave it back and told them I don’t want it.

This started an argument with them.

By the end I was asking why they can’t f__king listen to me and I am done with this.

My son called me a jerk for being ungrateful.

Edit: I don’t care how much cheaper ebooks are, I don’t enjoy reading from a screen. I just don’t

Technology may symbolize love and thoughtfulness to some, but for others, it represents exhaustion.

In this story, the Original Poster (OP), a woman in her 50s, has spent years asking her adult children to stop giving her tech gifts. Her reasons are clear: she works at a computer all day, dislikes troubleshooting gadgets, and finds screens draining rather than relaxing.

Yet despite her repeated requests, her family keeps gifting her devices, smart TVs, Bluetooth headphones, and now, a tablet “for reading.” When she returned the tablet and snapped, asking why they “can’t f***ing listen,” her son called her ungrateful.

Psychologists note that gift-giving often reflects the giver’s preferences, not the recipient’s needs.

According to a 2023 study published in Giftafeeling, people tend to choose gifts that align with their own tastes and interests, what researchers call the “egocentric bias” in gift-giving.

For OP’s children, tech gifts may represent convenience, modernity, or love expressed through “usefulness.” But emotional intelligence in gift-giving requires empathy, understanding why the recipient might feel differently.

Moreover, constant exposure to new technology can lead to “tech fatigue”, a real and measurable form of cognitive overload.

The American Psychological Association highlights that older adults often experience heightened frustration when forced to adapt to frequent digital updates or interfaces they didn’t choose.

For someone who already spends eight hours in front of a screen, being “gifted” another one may feel less like generosity and more like dismissal of personal boundaries.

Advice:

  • For OP: Communicate again, calmly, that thoughtful gifts don’t have to be high-tech; books, plants, or experiences matter more. Frustration was natural, but reinforcing your preferences with kindness might help your message finally land.
  • For the kids: Thoughtfulness isn’t about what you find cool; it’s about what makes her feel seen. Next time, skip the gadgets. Give her time, not tech.

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

These commenters empathized with the OP’s preference for non-tech gifts

purplpeanut − NTA technology is hard and just because they want you to “move with the times” doesn’t mean you should.

A paperback book practically costs nothing and the way the pages feel

in your hands is a totally different feeling than reading on the tablet.

However, I do think that maybe you should put out there of what you do want-your children

might be buying tech for you because they don’t really know what you might enjoy.

1962Michael − NTA. This isn't specific to techie gifts. You are expressing a preference.

If you would rather have no gift than a techie gift, then it's pretty easy to honor that request.

And nothing is easier than getting a gift card. It's not that hard to pay attention

when people tell you exactly what you do and do not want for a gift.

No one would think you're "ungrateful" if you didn't want skydiving lessons or French perfume.

PS If this latest tablet was actually an e-reader (such as Barnes & Noble's Nook or Amazon's Kindle)

and they downloaded a book or two from your list,

AND then they showed you how easy it is to use, then that might not be a totally AH thing to do.

1962Michael − NTA. This isn't specific to techie gifts. You are expressing a preference.

If you would rather have no gift than a techie gift, then it's pretty easy to honor that request.

And nothing is easier than getting a gift card. It's not that hard to pay attention

when people tell you exactly what you do and do not want for a gift.

No one would think you're "ungrateful" if you didn't want skydiving lessons or French perfume.

PS If this latest tablet was actually an e-reader (such as Barnes & Noble's Nook or Amazon's Kindle)

and they downloaded a book or two from your list,

AND then they showed you how easy it is to use, then that might not be a totally AH thing to do.

saintphoenixxx − NTA. My mom is a person (although she's in her 70s) that has no interest in technology.

Basic free TV, flip phone, no wifi. I've asked her a few times if she'd like a new phone

or if I can pay for her to get wifi and maybe Hulu. She says "no, I'm happy with what I have."

End of story. Your kids need to understand that this makes you uncomfortable and back off.

This group focused on boundaries and intent

MyPath2Follow − NTA. I was leaning toward ESH until I read about how they get mad when you ask for help.

If they can't be bothered to help you learn what THEY are buying you against your wishes, then meh.

They're the a-holes here. That said, ROKU is def easy for tech challenged people. I love ours, honestly

Reasonable-Bad-769 − NTA - I get that tech can be awesome but you have repeatedly asked not to receive these types of gifts.

The whole point of a gift, is to give that person something they want or need.

They have deliberately ignored these requests and then get angry with you when you ask for help in using these gifts.

Your kids are being selfish and rude to continue buying things you don't want or want to help you with.

IamIrene − Sounds like giving gifts to you is more about what they want than

what you've requested and that's really the crux of it here. They aren't listening to you.

NTA for getting frustrated, I get it. I'd ask for gift receipts and just return whatever I had no use for.

These users encouraged firmer action: return the gifts, buy what you actually want, and communicate directly that their behavior is dismissive

CampfiresInConifers − NTA. They are CLEARLY in the wrong.

If you don't want tech, or cat figurines, or Olive Garden gift cards, or whatever,

then the people who supposedly live you shouldn't be pushing those things on you.

People who love you buy you things you want, not things they think you should want.

Your family is being very rude. You know, you're a grown adult.

If you don't want those items in your house, remove them. Return them, donate them, sell them.

You have repeatedly stated that you don't want those things. Your kids can either be hurt or listen to you.

But you need to stop feeling frustrated & sorry for yourself & stop letting your kids railroad you.

[Reddit User] − NTA. I think in this case, it almost seems passive aggressive

to continue getting you tech you've repeatedly said you don't want.

It's also a waste of money to buy fancy tech for someone who won't appreciate it.

If politeness hasn't worked, then yeah, maybe it's time to come off a bit ungrateful to get it through their heads.

They're trying to tell you what to want, or implying you want something you just don't know you want it.

Which, hey, could be some parental karma because I'm sure it's something most parents have done to their kids at some point.

But enough is enough, unless they want you to start buying them things you think they want.

There you go: get them the analog version of something techy they requested next time.

DisneyBuckeye − NTA - the next time they do this, just say thank you and set it aside.

And then return it and buy yourself books. Or kitchen gadgets. Or wine. Or supplies to start a new hobby.

When they ask you about it, be honest. "I returned it and got myself something I actually wanted.

I've been telling you for years that I do not want technological gifts and nobody listens to me.

So rather than being upset that my family ignores my requests

I decided to help you get me what I really wanted and will use.

So with that being said, thank you for my new series/kitchenaid/case of wine/hobby supplies! I am very excited about them."

Would you have returned the tablet or kept it to keep the peace? At what point does politeness stop being worth the stress? Leave your thoughts in the comments!

Layla Bui

Layla Bui

Hi, I’m Layla Bui. I’m a lifestyle and culture writer for Daily Highlight. Living in Los Angeles gives me endless energy and stories to share. I believe words have the power to question the world around us. Through my writing, I explore themes of wellness, belonging, and social pressure, the quiet struggles that shape so many of our lives.

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