She Crochets to Calm Her Anxiety – But What Her Boyfriend Said Next Left Her Shaking

She’d had one of those days that makes you question why you even get out of bed.
By the time she got home from her full-time job in brain-injury rehab, she was running on fumes. Still, she walked the dog, wiped down the counters, threw dinner in the oven, and finally, finally, sat down with her crochet hook and a half-finished blanket.

That’s when her boyfriend wandered in, glanced at the yarn, and said, “Can you put that away? There’s still stuff to do around here.”

She works 40 hours a week saving people’s minds. He works part-time from home and games the rest of the day.

When she pointed that out, he lost it.

The Reddit thread exploded. Thousands of comments, zero chill, and exactly one universal verdict: the boyfriend’s about to become single.

Want the juicy details straight from the source? Dive into the original story below!

When Relaxation Becomes “The Problem”

In her Reddit post, she shared that her boyfriend often complains about how she spends her free time. He even said her cooking isn’t “good enough” and asked for less “Polish-style” meals. Meanwhile, he barely helps around the house.

It’s the classic double standard: her hobbies are “lazy,” but his gaming is “deserved.”

This hit home for a lot of readers, especially women. Many people know how it feels to work hard all day, then get criticized for wanting a few minutes of peace.

Crochet vs. Gaming: What’s Really Going On?

This fight isn’t really about crochet or video games. It’s about fairness, respect, and how each person values the other’s time.

She works a full-time, high-stress job and still manages most chores before relaxing. He works part-time and plays games for hours, yet complains about her small moments of joy. That’s not a “house problem” – that’s a respect problem.

He might think her crocheting means she’s ignoring him or the housework. But from her side, it’s her way to recharge. In fact, many psychologists say hobbies like crocheting help reduce anxiety and improve focus.

The Bigger Picture: Many Women Feel the Same Way

According to a 2023 study by the Pew Research Center, women in heterosexual relationships still do around 60% of the household chores, even when both partners work full-time.

Women are still expected to carry more of the load at home, while men’s free time is often seen as “earned.”

That’s what made this post so powerful. People could feel her frustration because they’ve lived it too.

Why Small Acts Matter

Relationship expert Dr. John Gottman once said,

“Successful long-term relationships are created through small words, small gestures, and small acts.”

Crochet is one of her small acts – a way to feel calm and happy after a long day. By calling it “useless,” her boyfriend showed that he doesn’t understand what she needs to stay emotionally healthy.

Could He Have a Point?

Maybe, deep down, he feels left out. Maybe he misses spending time with her. That’s fair but telling her to stop doing what she loves isn’t the answer.

Instead of turning her hobby into a fight, he could talk to her honestly about how he feels. Or, better yet, join her. Imagine if he tried crocheting while she showed him how! It could turn into something fun they share, instead of another argument.

Finding Balance

The key here is balance. Both partners should have time to relax and both should help with chores. Making a simple chore list or having a weekly check-in could help them divide responsibilities fairly.

Books like Fair Play by Eve Rodsky talk about this exact issue, how to make sure one person doesn’t end up doing everything while the other gets a free pass.

When both people feel seen and respected, hobbies stop being a problem. They become part of what keeps the relationship healthy.

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

Reddit, of course, went wild. Some users cracked jokes, while others offered real advice:

Most people sided with her, saying her boyfriend was being unfair and needed a reality check. 

A few reminded her that communication is key, not confrontation.

The Final Stitch

In the end, her crochet isn’t the problem. Her boyfriend’s attitude is. Everyone deserves a moment of peace after working hard, and no one should have to justify how they relax.

So the real question isn’t whether she should crochet less – it’s whether he’s willing to see her as an equal partner.

Because when one person guards their peace while the other guards their controller, love starts to feel one-sided.

So what do you think? Was she right to call him out, or should she have handled it differently? Would you keep stitching or put down the yarn for good?