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Auction War Escalates As Woman Accidentally Wins Quilt That Sister-In-Law Desperately Wanted

by Marry Anna
November 22, 2025
in Social Issues

Charity auctions are meant to bring people together for a good cause, but sometimes, a little friendly competition can go too far.

One Redditor found themselves in an awkward situation when they “accidentally” outbid their sister-in-law (SIL) for a handmade quilt that she desperately wanted.

It wasn’t intentional, but a playful bid turned into a win, and SIL left the auction visibly upset.

What seemed like harmless fun to one family member has caused tension in the family.

Auction War Escalates As Woman Accidentally Wins Quilt That Sister-In-Law Desperately Wanted
Not the actual photo

'AITA for "accidentally" winning a charity auction that my sister-in-law desperately wanted to win?'

So, this might sound a bit petty, but hear me out. My sister-in-law (SIL) is, well, competitive.

She's the type who has to win at everything - board games, sports, you name it. Our families get along well, except for her need to be the best.

Last weekend, we attended a charity auction. There was this gorgeous, handmade quilt being auctioned, and SIL mentioned how much she wanted it.

It was beautiful, sure, but I didn't think much of it. As the auction went on, SIL was fiercely bidding on the quilt.

It was for a good cause, so I thought I'd help drive the price up, you know, for charity.

Here's where it gets tricky. I playfully bid a bit higher than SIL, expecting her to outbid me again. But to everyone's surprise, she didn't.

The auctioneer called it, and I won the quilt. SIL was visibly upset and left shortly after.

Later, my brother called me to say that SIL had been saving up for this auction specifically to get that quilt for their anniversary.

He said I should've known she wanted it and accused me of doing this to spite her.

I explained it was just a bit of fun for a good cause and that I didn't know about their anniversary plan.

My family is split. Some think I did nothing wrong, while others say I should've let SIL have the quilt, knowing how much it meant to her.

I feel a bit guilty, but at the same time, it was an auction for charity, and I did contribute a significant amount. So, Reddit, AITA?

The situation paints a vivid picture of how a seemingly innocent act, bidding on an item at a charity auction, can tap into deeper dynamics of competition, perceived fairness, and resource control within a family.

The OP’s sister‑in‑law (SIL) clearly placed emotional value on the quilt, it was something she wanted, and she prepared for it. The OP, meanwhile, bid “for charity” and expected the SIL to outbid him, not realising his win would hurt her.

From the perspective of rivalry and resource allocation, sibling (or sibling‑like) relationships often revolve around competition for scarce or symbolic resources.

One review of sibling rivalry findings explains that when resources (attention, possessions, acknowledgment) are seen as limited, competition escalates—even among extended family.

In this case, the quilt became that symbolic resource, and SIL felt defeated when it went to someone else in the family.

On the flip side, the auction behaviour itself has sociological and psychological dimensions.

Research into charity auctions shows that bidders often act not just to win an item, but also to contribute to the cause, to show status or to participate in the social good.

A field experiment found that bidders in charity auctions consistently paid a higher premium and engaged more persistently than in non‑charity auctions.

Thus the OP’s comment about “driving up the price for charity” aligns with that research, his intent was philanthropic, though its impact was personal.

The OP’s action of bidding was neither inherently malicious nor oblivious, but the emotional context and family dynamics coloured the outcome.

Recognising that the SIL had flagged her interest, the OP might have paused or had a chat once he realised how strongly she felt.

The next step is to address the fallout, a sincere acknowledgment that he didn’t realise its significance, an apology for the hurt caused, and a gesture of recognition, for example, offering to help her find a similar quilt or reserving joint participation in the next auction so she can win it.

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

These commenters roasted OP for trying to frame their behavior as an accident when it was clearly deliberate.

NoContest9016 − Ma’am, I think the term you should use is "purposely," not "accidentally".

Sr_Dagonet − You don‘t drive up the price in an auction to the disadvantage of relatives or friends. That‘s an a__hole move. YTA.

Irishwol − YTA. Accidentally winning an auction is when you scratch your nose and find you've just bought three Herdwick sheep.

What you did was decide to tease your SiL under the cover of 'it's for charity,' and it didn't go the way you thought.

You didn't want the quilt. You wanted to annoy your SiL. Congratulations. You got your wish. Now give the woman the quilt and apologise.

sanantoniogirl71 − YTA, why would you bid on an item, win, and then act shocked that your sister in law is upset?

Clearly, this was done out of spite, or you would have offered to let her buy the quilt off you. Good grief, you sound insufferable.

[Reddit User] − YTA. Wrap the quilt in a great big apology and give it to your sister-in-law.

These users emphasized how manipulative OP’s reasoning sounds.

ghostoftommyknocker − YTA. You single out your SIL for being competitive, then write a post that displays no evidence of that.

You admit you deliberately wanted to drive up the price SIL would have to pay for something you don't even like, which comes across as mean.

Trying to justify it as "for charity" sounds manipulative.

Then you admit in the comments that you also have a competitive streak and it kicked in, which just makes your original post seem dishonest because it's now clear that...

You didn't do this for charity, you did this because your idea of "fun" is to deliberately make it harder for people around you to succeed at the things they...

Your brother is right; "spite" absolutely is the correct word to describe your behaviour here.

Enigmaticsole − Are you planning on keeping it or giving it to her? You didn’t “accidentally” win.

You deliberately outbid her to drive the price up. You may not have known her bidding limit, but don’t pretend you outbid her by accident.

The nice thing to do would be to give her the quilt if you don’t even particularly like it.

If money is an issue, maybe she could pay you her top bid for it or something…

yeahyeahyeah6661 − YTA. If you knew she wanted it so badly, why would you bid on it?

Driving the price up for charity is great and all, but you can also donate directly to the charity, so it wasn't like this was your only chance to donate.

These Redditors are equally critical of OP’s behavior, pointing out how transparent their attempt to one-up their sister-in-law is.

TwoBionicknees − YTA. So you knew she wanted it, but you insist on telling us how competitive she is... so she bid on and tried to win everything right, or...

You accidentally bid on something to drive the price up because of 'charity'.

It's a charity; they take checks, you didn't want the quilt, and you beat her to it, yet magically, she didn't leave with it?

Yeah, you totally accidentally stole it out from under someone who apparently beats you in many other areas so you wanted to beat her on this one and now you...

czzyp − YTA. You can pretend as much as you like that it was all in good faith and fun, and you were just pushing up the price for charity.

You made a deliberate decision to bid for the quilt so that your SIL would have to pay more (money she obviously doesn’t have) or outbid her.

I think you were mean-spirited, and I think you know it. Don’t bother offering her the quilt because she will likely just tell you to shove it.

thedanceofKatalina − If I understand this right, you "accidentally" bid and made the price higher and higher until she could no longer afford it.

Did you gift it to her later? Your motivation is questionable at least...

These users were blunt in their assessment, calling OP out for their petty actions.

Life_Initiative_9393 − So give it to her already.

a-_rose − I read the title and thought n t a it was probably a raffle but NOPE LOL YTA you didn’t “accidentally” win anything, you deliberately outbid her.

Your “competitive streak” is petty/spiteful, and everyone sees right through it.

The OP’s actions weren’t malicious, but they did tap into some underlying family tension. Was bidding on the quilt just playful fun, or did it inadvertently take away something meaningful to the sister-in-law?

Was it an innocent mistake, or should the OP have recognized the deeper significance the quilt held for SIL? How would you have handled the situation? Share your thoughts below!

Marry Anna

Marry Anna

Hello, lovely readers! I’m Marry Anna, a writer at Dailyhighlight.com. As a woman over 30, I bring my curiosity and a background in Creative Writing to every piece I create. My mission is to spark joy and thought through stories, whether I’m covering quirky food trends, diving into self-care routines, or unpacking the beauty of human connections. From articles on sustainable living to heartfelt takes on modern relationships, I love adding a warm, relatable voice to my work. Outside of writing, I’m probably hunting for vintage treasures, enjoying a glass of red wine, or hiking with my dog under the open sky.

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