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Younger Sister Tells Older Sister She Is No Longer The ‘It Girl’ After Dramatic Glow Up And Role Reversal

by Jeffrey Stone
December 19, 2025
in Social Issues

A younger sister once lived in the shadow of her older sibling, the small-town beauty who turned heads while she endured cruel nicknames and constant teasing. Years later she transformed herself through hard work, emerging confident, successful, and engaged, while her sister faced divorce, job struggles, and weight gain after life took a difficult turn.

Sharing a home brought buried pain to the surface. The older sister kept bringing up old insecurities and flashed unflattering childhood photos to new friends, sparking laughter at her expense. One night the younger sister snapped back, pointing out the complete reversal: her sibling was no longer the center of attention and now depended on her generosity.

A story about sisters clashing over changed appearances and past roles.

Younger Sister Tells Older Sister She Is No Longer The 'It Girl' After Dramatic Glow Up And Role Reversal
Not the actual photo.

'AITA for telling my sister she is no longer the ‘’it girl’’?'

So I (25F) have a sister (30F). We are from a small town where everyone knows each other.

When we were younger she was the it girl of our town. She was really pretty, social, well liked by everyone in general.

I was the opposite. I looked like dobby from Harry Potter. I was extremely skinny, had crooked teeth, frizzy hair and a huge nose. Really grotesque to look at in...

When people saw us together they would get really suprised. They would often ask us whether we have the same dad or not.

On top of that I always felt like my sister was ashamed of me. She never wanted to take me anywhere or wouldn’t like being seen with me.

She even told me it’s because people ask her questions about me. The thing that really annoyed me was when her friends would make fun of me.

They would often call me the little goblin and my sister never stick out for me.

Anyways since I knew from a young age people wouldn’t like me for my looks I always worked on my grades. I went to a good university.

Then I worked on my looks, I gained weight, got a hair care routine got a nose job and got braces. Now I look 7 out of 10.

My sister's life on the other hand didn’t go as well. She went to university dropped out,

got married and got divorced and moved back at home and works in a market. She also gained a lot of weight because of stress.

This summer she called me asking whether she could come stay with me and my fiancé for a while.

She told me she cannot live with my mom anymore and there is nothing to do in out small town. I agreed and she started living with us.

The issue is, whenever she gets the chance she talks about our past. She says how much I changed myself and tells everyone my looks weren’t always ‘’great’’.

The other day we were out with my friends and she did that again. But she also showed the most unflattering childhood picture of me and people started laughing.

I don’t know what happened but I started seeing red. I told her she also looks really different now like 40 pounds heavier.

She is also no longer the it girl so she should stop acting that way. She is the girl who lives with her sisters house rent free and tries to...

We are currently not talking. So Reddit AITA?

EDIT: as some of you have guessed it, I don’t really talk about my braces and my nose job with other people.

It’s not something I hide, I just don’t randomly bring it up saying I’ve got this and this done. I think that’s why my friends were suprised.

In this case, the Redditor’s impressive personal growth contrasts sharply with her sister’s current challenges, reigniting old wounds from childhood.

From one side, the older sister’s comments seem rooted in nostalgia mixed with envy. She’s clinging to a time when she felt on top, perhaps struggling to adjust to her own setbacks like a divorce and career shifts.

Meanwhile, the younger one carries scars from feeling sidelined and mocked growing up, making those reminders feel like deliberate jabs rather than harmless stories.

Psychologists note that sibling dynamics often involve comparison, especially around success and appearance. Unresolved feelings from youth can resurface in adulthood, turning minor remarks into major triggers.

According to a classic Psychology Today article on adult sibling rivalry, approximately one-third of siblings describe their relationships as rivalrous or distant, often tracing back to perceived imbalances in attention or treatment during childhood.

This story broadens to common family issues like jealousy over life paths diverging: one sibling thriving academically and personally, the other facing hurdles.

Research highlights how such rivalries persist, with experts like counseling psychologist Karen Lewis describing siblings as “our ‘first’ marriage partners,” shaping how we handle closeness and conflict long-term.

Karen Lewis, a counseling psychologist, emphasizes: “Our brothers and sisters were our ‘first’ marriage partners.” This insight applies here: the early exclusion and teasing left lasting imprints, while the current living arrangement amplifies insecurities on both sides.

In this setup, sharing a home can heighten everyday frustrations, turning small comments into big blowups as both sisters grapple with shifted roles and lingering insecurities. The temporary arrangement, meant as a kind gesture, instead spotlights differences in confidence and life progress, making neutral conversations rare.

Old patterns of comparison creep back, fueled by proximity and unspoken expectations. Without clear boundaries, resentment builds quietly, affecting not just them but the overall household vibe. Finding separate spaces or routines might ease the daily tension until deeper issues get addressed.

Neutral advice? Open, calm conversations could help: acknowledge past hurts without blame, set boundaries for respectful talk, and focus on supporting each other’s present.

If tensions linger, family therapy offers tools to unpack resentment and rebuild empathy. Many find that addressing these patterns leads to stronger bonds, or at least peaceful coexistence.

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

Some people believe the sister is jealous and the OP was justified in calling her out.

SunnyBunnyHopHop − NTA. You are doing your sister a favor by letting her stay with you & your fiancé.

For her to make passive aggressive comments & try to belittle you in front of your friends is completely out of line.

You are completely justified in calling her out/putting her in her place following such remarks.

And to be clear OP, I hope you recognize that your sister is only saying these things because she is jealous of you.

How attractive or popular you were or were not in adolescence has absolutely no bearing on your life now as an adult.

Your social status in high school only matters while you are in high school.

For your sister to even care enough to bring that up now as an adult is nothing short of pathetic.

You were right to call her out on that, & I hope you are enjoying living your best life as an adult (which is what really counts)!

[Reddit User] − NTA. Your sister peaked and is wishing for the good ol days. She is jealous and wants to ruin your happiness any way she can.

Also why did you agree to let your sister live with you when she's been horrible to you your whole life?

And the age gap is big enough to where this was an adult bullying a child at one point.

HuskerCard123 − "I'm sorry the best time of your life was when we were children and you felt more attractive than me,

but now we are adults, you live in my house for free, and I expect to not be treated like I was when we were children. You can be an...

NTA, obviously, but why is she even out with you and your friends? They aren't her friends.

Some people suggest the sister should move out due to ongoing toxicity.

KronkLaSworda − NTA, but it's time for her to move back home or somewhere else.

She doesn't get to disrespect you like that and stay in your home rent free.

goldenfingernails − NTA but it seems both of you have some unresolved anger towards each other.

You are still upset at her behavior towards you when you were younger. She's jealous that you are doing so well and frustrated she is not.

She needs to rein that in. You made choices, she made choices, your current situation is the result of those choices.

Sit her down and talk openly. If she's not willing to come to terms, then you have the right to kick her out.

Others judge both siblings poorly for pettiness and unresolved issues.

KayCeeBayBeee − ESH, I have serious doubts over this is real or not as it reads like every single “revenge of the nerds” fantasy I’ve seen written online for a...

but if it is in fact real - she sucks for obvious reasons but you suck for handling this lingering resentment in the most dramatic way possible.

[Reddit User] − You guys both sound insanely unhealthy and competitive. This isn’t a normal sibling dynamic in adulthood. It seems living together is toxic.

She needs to go her own way, it’s not your job to support her. You need therapy to work through your anger and resentment (for yourself because you deserve to...

LilacHazy − ESH tbh. You were petty. She was petty. Looks aren’t the be all and end all, except for between you two it seems.

Some people say more context is needed to judge the sister’s comments.

[Reddit User] − I'm gonna say ESH- I feel like more context is needed in how she says these things.

Does she linger on past descriptions of you? Or does it sound more like "look how far he's come!"

My siblings do the latter with me: of course there was communication around my feelings and their intentions which I feel is needed here.

This sibling saga reminds us how family roles can flip dramatically, leaving everyone navigating hurt feelings and unspoken regrets. Was the Redditor’s sharp response justified after years of buildup, or did it escalate an already fragile situation? How would you balance offering help while protecting your peace when old dynamics resurface?

Ultimately, growth means choosing empathy over score-keeping. Do you think a heartfelt talk could mend things, or is space the kinder option here? Drop your thoughts, what’s your take on handling reversed roles with family?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/0 votes | 0%

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone is a valuable freelance writer at DAILY HIGHLIGHT. As a senior entertainment and news writer, Jarvis brings a wealth of expertise in the field, specifically focusing on the entertainment industry.

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