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Girl Gets Into Dream College While Her Brother Is Rejected, He Tries To Sabotage Her Offer And She Finally Snaps

by Leona Pham
February 5, 2026
in Social Issues

Sibling rivalry can be intense, especially when both people are chasing the same dream. What starts as friendly competition can slowly turn sour once expectations, pressure, and jealousy enter the picture. When that dream involves college acceptances, emotions can spiral fast.

In this post, the OP explains how she and her older brother applied to the same prestigious university. While she was accepted, he was not, and the rejection hit him hard.

Instead of cooling off with time, his resentment only grew, affecting their shared space and daily life at home. After months of tension and escalating behavior, OP finally snapped and did something she admits may have crossed a line. Scroll down to see what happened next and whether Reddit thought her reaction was justified.

One teen said her brother’s rejection turned into relentless resentment after her acceptance

Girl Gets Into Dream College While Her Brother Is Rejected, He Tries To Sabotage Her Offer And She Finally Snaps
Not the actual photo

AITA for mocking my brother for getting rejected by his dream college (that I got into) because he keeps tormenting me over it?

My brother Jake (18M) and I (17F) had the same dream college, H University.

Also, in case you’re confused by the ages, we’re 1.5 years apart,

but I skipped a grade so we were in the same grade for nearly our entire life.

Jake was way more passionate about H Uni than I was.

He had several H merch clothing, and kind of just assumed he was going there.

For example, in conversations he’d say things like “Once I’m at H....” or “After I go to H, my plan is...”.

Basically, his life plan rested on him going to H.

Jake and I got along pretty well, we’d sometimes give each other advice or study together.

However, during college app season, he got super competitive once he realized I was also applying to H.

He’d refuse to study together, look over each other’s essays,

and he’d constantly tell me to not even bother applying.

Then, decisions came out and we opened them at the same time.

I was accepted, and he was rejected.

Jake had a massive panic attack, and instead of celebrating my acceptance with my family,

I sat in my room all day because Jake would get furious when he saw me.

I once even caught him trying to unlock my laptop to decline my offer,

since his friend dmed me to warn that he had been talking about doing that.

My parents obviously punished him for that, which made it so much worse.

When my H sweatshirt came in, he screamed at me for “showing off”, when I just put it in my closet.

He told so many people that I only got in because I was a girl and that H mixed the siblings up.

Honestly, I felt bad for him because I would be crushed too if I were him.

Everytime I tried to get him to stop, it got worse.

So I just kept tolerating it.

I thought it’d get better after the summer, once college actually started.

It has not. Now it’s really set in that he is going to a (good imo) state school, and not H.

His anger is largely compounded by the fact that he’s going to the same college

that he used to condescend other students about aiming for.

My classes start soon, so I’ve been setting up in our study, which I share with Jake.

Both of our rooms are tiny, with no room to study in,

so we share a study with two desks that face away from each other.

Jake cleared out my whole desk, and broke my lamp in the process.

He says that I need to study in my room,

so he can use the study without distractions for his classes.

We’ve always both worn headphones, there’s literally no distraction.

He just doesn’t want to see me taking classes at H.

I’m so f__king done, I just want to be proud

that I got into this college and actually learn s__t without my brother screaming at me about it.

Where IMBTA: We got into an argument,

and I told him that of course he got rejected since H didn’t take toddlers.

I’ve also been wearing my H sweatshirt around the house constantly, which he gets angry about.

He kept bothering me, so I superglued H r__ection letters in the drawers of his desk,

so he has to see them when he opens them.

Most people know what it feels like to have a long-held dream suddenly collapse, especially when someone close achieves the very thing they wanted most.

That kind of loss doesn’t just confirm disappointment; it can fracture identity, pride, and family bonds all at once. When those emotions go unprocessed, they often leak out sideways as anger, resentment, or cruelty.

In this situation, the OP wasn’t simply celebrating a college acceptance while her brother coped with rejection. She was navigating a volatile emotional landscape shaped by comparison, rivalry, and grief.

Jake had built his self-image around getting into his dream college. When that future vanished, he didn’t just lose a school; he lost the version of himself he believed he was becoming. Watching his younger sister step into that role intensified the wound.

His behavior, trying to sabotage her acceptance, breaking her belongings, and attempting to control shared space, suggests not just jealousy, but a desperate attempt to regain power and dignity after feeling humiliated and displaced.

A fresh way to view the OP’s actions is through the lens of reactive self-defense rather than pure spite. While many readers see her mocking and retaliation as unnecessary cruelty, psychology suggests that prolonged exposure to hostility can push people toward “counter-aggression.”

When one person feels constantly targeted and unsupported, especially within their own home, small acts of provocation can begin to feel like the only remaining way to assert boundaries.

This doesn’t make the behavior healthy, but it makes it understandable. Importantly, gender expectations may also play a role: boys are often socialized to externalize failure as anger, while girls are expected to absorb tension quietly. When she finally pushed back, it came out sharp and messy.

In Psychology Today, experts note that sibling relationships can remain deeply rivalrous well into adulthood because old emotional patterns and comparisons formed in childhood often resurface when siblings confront life-defining events together.

The article explains that adult siblings can “push each other’s buttons without knowing why or how” and quickly fall back into competitive dynamics rooted in early experiences, even when they are no longer children. This deeply ingrained rivalry can make achievements feel threatening rather than joyful when experienced by a sibling.

Applied here, this insight helps explain why Jake’s behavior escalated rather than softened with time. His anger wasn’t simply about a college decision; it was about being forced to confront a future that no longer matched the identity he had built for himself.

Every sweatshirt, class setup, or shared space became a reminder of that loss. At the same time, it sheds light on why the OP eventually lashed out.

By mocking the rejection, she wasn’t trying to be cruel for cruelty’s sake; she was reacting from exhaustion and a need to stop feeling small in her own home. Unfortunately, that response also fed directly into the shame fueling her brother’s aggression, tightening the loop rather than breaking it.

What this situation really points to is the danger of leaving intense sibling rivalry unmanaged. When jealousy and resentment are allowed to simmer without adult intervention, boundaries blur and behavior deteriorates on both sides. Pride, grief, and fear collide, and everyone starts acting out roles they didn’t choose.

Check out how the community responded:

This group felt the brother’s jealousy crossed into alarming behavior

highoncatnipbrownies − NTA. Your brother is hitting obsessive levels of jealousy.

Trying to decline your offer letter? What a horrible thing to even think of.

He deserves the r__ection letters in the drawers (lol that's hilarious) even though it was a little mean, he did ask for it.

At this point, your parents really need to step in and tell him to calm the down already.

You didn't do anything to affect his college acceptance.

You don't deserve any jealousy its 100% not your fault

and he is having an unhinged level of aggression towards you over it. It's not ok.

AmIBeingPunkd- − I once even caught him trying to unlock my laptop to decline my offer,

since his friend dmed me to warn that he had been talking about doing that.

Hooooooly smokes. If it wasn’t painfully clear already, NTA.

Your brother’s jealousy has reached p__cho level.

Congratulations, sorry your brother’s too self-centered to be happy for anyone other than himself.

ETA His anger is largely compounded by the fact that he’s going to the same college

that he used to condescend other students about aiming for.

HAHAHA talk about life serving him a well-needed slice of humble pie. Love it.

henchwench89 − NTA while your response wasn’t the most mature (hilarious though) theres only so much a person can take

Your parents need to step in here and deal with their toddler tantrum throwing son

because its not your fault he didn’t get into his dream college.

The way he’s treating you is unacceptable and the fact

that he tried to decline your offer makes him a complete ah.

They need to do something about him

These commenters said both siblings escalated the situation unnecessarily

ChungusMcGoodboy − ESH. Your brother has been acting out in an extreme way.

I think your parents need to get more involved in that respect.

It sounds like you both still live at home? You sounded quite reasonable until the last paragraph.

I get that he pushed you to this point,

but gluing the r__ection letters into his desk definitely solidified you as an a__hole.

ElectricMoccoson − ESH - Your brother moreso than yourself.

What your brother tried to do was potentially illegal (it would have been fraud)

and his attitude is no doubt born from jealousy.

Your parents should step in to calm this down before it goes too far.

For example: gluing r__ection letters to his desk.

That's not helping the situation, that's holding a red rag to an enraged bull.

I understand the reasons why you would do that,

but rubbing your victory in his face is only going to make your brother escalate his behaviour.

Ohcrumbcakes − Honestly, with your final bit? ESH Until you decided

to get in his level you were not the AH but you’ve turned into one.

Which is a shame. You need to press your parents to hold him accountable for his actions.

But then you need to be held accountable for yours too you are,

in fact, actively goading him on now.

Were you applying for the same programs?

If not, then point out that you weren’t in direct competition with him

so you couldn’t have “taken his spot” or anything.

(Eg if you applied for Biology and he applied for History).

If you did actively compete for the same program then that makes it a bit more complicated,

but you’re still not the reason why he didn’t get in.

Your grades, extracurriculars and any essays you had to submit would be what got you a position.

Unless your parents step in then you do recognize he is going

to continue sabotaging your academics right?

If he was already going to try to decline your acceptance and cleared out your desk. ...

you do know that means he’s willing to do thinks like “spill coffee” onto your computer hardrive,

cut out the internet when you need to sign in for a lecture, etc, right? Talk to your parents.

If your bedroom is too small for a study

(quite frankly you can use your laptop on your bed it isn’t

that difficult to do all your school work in a really small room)

then ask your parents if they’d be willing to switch rooms for you for this semester.

If they don’t want to parent either of you and teach you how to be respectful adults

then hopefully they will at least be willing to accept

that the cost of buying multiple new laptops in a year might be more annoying than switching rooms.

I’m sorry your brother is being such an ass, but you’re not acting a whole lot better than him atm.

They emphasized parental failure as the biggest issue in the story

andreaburgos − I am torn between NTA and ESH.

Indeed your brother is behaving like an entitled brat

and his attitude sounds exhausting,

but you had ended on top and perhaps could have avoided wearing the merch around the house

(although a very mild level of a\holery there). My question is WTF are your parents?

They should be the ones coaching your brother on how to accept this set back

and focus on the future instead of being a brat. ..

Edit: just read the bit about the r__ection letter. .. yeah. .. ESH

strawb3rry_shortcak3 − ESH. Your brother sucks, you suck, and your parents REALLY suck.

I was first going to say that your brother and your parents were just the assholes

until I read your concluding remarks about you gluing r__ection letters to his desk.

Funny for a movie scene, but "ouch" in real life. ... Hear me out.

Your brother's entire identity was wrapped up into going to that university,

and now all that has been shattered.

His entire sense of self worth down the drain in a single moment;

and to compound it, he now has to go through the daily reminder of it

since you were accepted to his dream school.

Now, I know this isn't your fault and the way he's been acting is just down right atrocious. ..

however, hurt people hurt people.

This isn't a justification for his behavior, just an underlying reason for it.

But, by knowing this underlying reason, you can better attempt to find a solution to the issues arising.

Your parents are useless and aren't going to do anything about it,

so it's now up to you and your brother to decide how this plays out.

So far, you guys have only escalated the situation with your actions,

and this will just lead to more hurt and resentment along the way.

This may not matter if you truly dont care for your sibling,

but if you want to preserve a relationship with him,

then maybe change your approach to the situation.

Perhaps you could try using your words and talk to him.

Tell him you know how much it sucks that he wasn't accepted

and that you hate it just as much as he does.

Maybe you were looking forward to continuing going to school with one another.

Also, use the talk as an opportunity to explain to him your perspective of the situation as well.

Let him know how hurt you are that instead of celebrating in your accomplishments,

he is actively working to undermine and thwart them.

It's unfair to put the responsibility on you when you've been on the receiving end of all his b__lshit,

but that's what being the bigger person is sometimes.

Its doing things to makes things right even when you aren't the one necessarily in the wrong.

Maybe try one last time to build a bridge between you two,

if you want to even salvage your relationship, and put the ball in his court.

Show some compassion and empathy for his experience

and see if that will help you guys come to a solution,

or at least an understanding, regarding the situation. Congrats on getting into HU!

helpreddit12345 − EHS but mostly him because he won’t knock it off I would be triggered too tbh.

Question is H Harvard?

This group leaned toward sympathy for the sister despite the petty revenge

Zogzog60 − I could go E S H, but I'm going to go NTA.

You don't owe him anything for being accepted and him being rejected.

He is clearly acting like a toddler. He's just hurt and upset.

Not your fault though. I don't think you are an ah for wearing your college sweater either,

but super glueing the r__ection letter is where you crossed a line.

He'll get used to it eventually and congrats for your obtaining your place in the meantime!

JamFifteen15 − NTA I would put the r__ection letter glue onto the desk draw on one of the revenge subs as I find that funny

Ungrouped / Contextual Comments

(Included for completeness as they did not directly match the predefined groups.)

[Reddit User] − After reading what you did, ESH. This is escalating.

Where are your parents in all this? For college bound kids, you both need to grow up.

carlocarlow − NTA but this is a toxic situation can you dorm at the college?

Jake will sabotage you IMO that level of extended anger etc is dangerous I think

LibraWoman1 − NTA. Yeah you ended up going too far but that was a response to his ongoing campaign.

Can not believe he seriously considered/ tried to reject.

Your parents should have stepped in ( and up) then- that is serious.

Not a ‘kids will be kids they should work it out’.

Dharsarahma − NTA because you are allowed to be happy and even if this is a struggle for him,

he needs to be able to learn to deal with it and get over it.

His behaviour since he found you were applying

and especially his behaviour after your acceptance is not okay.

He is isolating you and breaking your s__t. Plainly bullying you.

Although supergluing his r__ection letters is a small satisfying revenge,

it's also assholish because this is clearly something that he is very upset about

because he has wanted to go this place for majority of his life.

Maybe a family discussion is needed if you guys can't talk about it maturely. Also what's toddlers?

Many readers agreed the brother’s behavior crossed serious lines, but opinions split once revenge entered the picture. Was mocking him a breaking point response or did it pour fuel on a fire already out of control?

The story highlights how rejection, when left unsupported, can corrode family dynamics fast. Should the sister have stayed silent, or was standing her ground inevitable? And where were the parents when things started unraveling? Share your thoughts.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 0/2 votes | 0%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 2/2 votes | 100%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/2 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 0/2 votes | 0%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/2 votes | 0%

Leona Pham

Leona Pham

Hi, I'm Leona. I'm a writer for Daily Highlight and have had my work published in a variety of other media outlets. I'm also a New York-based author, and am always interested in new opportunities to share my work with the world. When I'm not writing, I enjoy spending time with my family and friends. Thanks for reading!

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