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They Threw Away a Newborn’s Formula, Then Told His Mother She Was “Overreacting”

by CTV4
April 26, 2026
in Social Issues

The first weeks after having a baby are supposed to be about healing, adjusting, and figuring things out one day at a time. It’s messy, exhausting, and overwhelming even under the best circumstances.

For this 20-year-old new mom, it’s been all of that and more. A premature birth scare, a painful recovery, sleepless nights, and constant pressure from the people around her to parent a certain way.

Still, she found something that worked. Her baby was fed, safe, and slowly gaining weight. That should have been enough.

But one decision, made without her consent, turned an already fragile situation into a breaking point.

Because when she came home and found her baby’s food thrown in the trash, it stopped being about opinions. It became something else entirely.

They Threw Away a Newborn’s Formula, Then Told His Mother She Was “Overreacting”
Not the actual photo

Here’s how it all unfolded:

'AITAH for blowing up at my son's father and grandmother when I found out they trashed my son's formula and pacifiers?'

So I (20f) live with my boyfriend (28m) and his parents. Despite being on birth control, our son is a oops baby.

He came early at 36 weeks, I was scared shitless by the labor and delivery nurses telling me he would need NICU time (he didn’t),

he would have feeding or breathing problems (he didn’t), and he was just overall small, and I ended up with a second degree tear due to him being sunny side...

now almost 7 weeks later it still hurts to sit down and move certain ways. I still have back pain from where they placed the epidural. My recovery hasnt been...

My stitches are healing well for the most part and I'm going to get an IUD placed to have a more permanent type of birth control because

even after being on the birth control pills for 2 years, they aren't 100% pregnancy proof

Since my son was born early the nurses gave him formula at first. I really didn't care?

I just wanted my son to be healthy and be able to come home. My son's father/boyfriend and his family have pushed me to breastfeed all through my pregnancy.

It wasn't ever something that really crossed my mind my goal was just to have a healthy baby and we both survive.

The hospital also gave us a pacifier and my son's grandma said that pacifiers were just a crutch that

babies didn't need and I was setting him up to "have teeth problems and need braces later on"

I tried pumping with the hospital grade pump and it hurt. I tried b__ast feeding my son but it hurt and a lactation consultant at the hospital said

I would struggle with b__ast feeding due to my anatomy and the fact my son has a tongue tie.

I just said ok whatever, let's give him formula. My son's father's family (especially his mom) were NOT happy about it.

While I'm up changing diapers and bottle feeding my son, she's also up and in my ear telling me how b__ast is best and

"you never know what's exactly in formula!" (spoiler alert she b__ast fed my son's father and his 3 siblings so

I guess it's like some sort of pride thing for her? Idk, she was the same way with my boyfriend's sister when she had her kids)

My son's father even said one time it would be "hot" to see me b__ast feed and to be honest that just gave me the ick so bad

I haven't gone back to work yet (despite me applying to jobs left and right) so whatever my son's father brings in with his paychecks is how I'm surviving right...

It's been tough and I have to pretty much justify how I spend "his" money. "Why did I spend so and so at Walmart?"

Our son needed diapers, wipes and formula. A can only lasts so long. "Well why can't you start back b__ast feeding to save money?"

I don't want to! Our son is happy and healthy and thriving on formula. My son's father won't even make him bottles because he thinks

it's "unnatural" when I supposedly can just magically make b__ast milk appear again.

My son had an appointment this morning to check his weight with the pediatrician because

while he is gaining weight, it's been slow and he's been spitting up the formula.

Ended up being gone for longer than I wanted to because the pediatrician's office was running behind.

When I got back to the house, I went to make my son a bottle and found the formula canister empty.

My son is crying for his milk and I ask his father what happened to the formula can because it was still half full.

He just shrugs and goes "it looked old so I threw it out" I asked him why would he do such a f__king stupid thing and he yelled at me...

Then his mom came into the kitchen and yelled at me for "disrespecting" her son.

I had to grab the formula can out of the trash can and saw all of the dumped formula powder just sitting there along with my son's pacifiers all mixed...

At this point my son's grandma picked him up and was trying to console him because he was getting upset.

She started backing up my son's father saying the formula he's on always looks "expired" and old and gross.

I ended up yelling "OH MY GOD" and called my son's father selfish and s__tty for wasting something so important

It ended up with his mom yelling at me to get out of her house and she refused to give me my son as he was crying.

I lost it on her and screamed at her "GIVE ME MY F__KING BABY" and she threatened to call the police on me for verbally abusing her and physically abusing...

I ended up leaving with my son to a friend's house and thankfully had a sample can of his formula stashed away in the diaper bag

I keep in my car along with the two small sample cans the pediatrician's office gave me today.

Both my son's father and grandma have texted me, asking me to come back and saying I shouldn't have been so "dramatic" and that my son's father was just "trying...

He wasted the baby’s food and put my son in a difficult situation, and he doesn’t even get it. Neither does his mom since she's backing him up on this

They're both making me feel so guilty. I'm just trying to keep my son alive. I ended up calling my mom to talk to someone about this whole mess and

she agreed with my son's grandma about how I should have b__ast fed (or at least used donor milk lol) but

she also said I'm the mom and can make my own decisions about my son. I asked her if we could stay with her for a couple of days and...

she just didn't have room for us (which is fair she has my 4 younger siblings living with her as it is).

I feel so mad and frustrated. I'm literally on hold with my son's pediatrician's to see if they can give me any more sample cans before I go back to...

AITAH for getting mad over formula being trashed or was my son's father in the right here?

Edit: My friend loaned me enough cash to get my son a can of formula thank god.

My son's pediatrician's office never picked up so I left a message for the receptionist and i'm hoping they will get back to me before they close.

We can only stay with my friend for maybe a couple of days because I don't have anything beyond whats in the diaper bag for my son.

I'm going to apply for WIC and SNAP benefits and see if a lawyer will help me get sole custody of my son.

I'm not married to his father and I really don't want to go back to his mom's house if I don't have to.

I should have grabbed some of my own stuff but I was so angry I just wanted to get out of there.

Going back to playing phone tag and trying to get help to get us out of this situation.

A huge thank you to the redditor who helped me with finding resources in my county and offered to help with stuff like diapers for my son so

we don't have to go back to his dad's/grandma's. I have a lot of places to call tomorrow to hopefully get the ball rolling

Her son arrived earlier than expected, at 36 weeks. The warnings from nurses about possible complications added layers of fear before he even came home.

He ended up being okay, thankfully. No NICU stay, no major issues. But the emotional toll stuck, along with the physical one.

Recovery wasn’t easy. She was dealing with pain from a tear, lingering discomfort from the epidural, and the general exhaustion that comes with caring for a newborn.

Feeding, which should have been a straightforward necessity, became another source of stress.

She tried breastfeeding. It hurt. She tried pumping. It hurt more. A lactation consultant explained that her anatomy and her baby’s tongue tie would make things difficult.

So she made a decision. She switched to formula.

It worked. Her baby was fed. He was growing, even if slowly. He was okay.

But her boyfriend and his mother didn’t see it that way.

From the beginning, they pushed breastfeeding. Not gently, not as support, but as pressure.

Comments about what was “best,” subtle guilt about formula, even moments that crossed into discomfort, like her boyfriend framing breastfeeding in a way that felt inappropriate.

It wasn’t just disagreement. It was control.

Financially, she was already in a vulnerable position. She wasn’t working yet, relying on her boyfriend’s income, and being questioned about every purchase. Formula, something essential, became something she had to justify.

Then came the moment that changed everything.

After a long pediatrician visit, she returned home to a hungry, crying baby. She went to prepare a bottle, only to find the formula container empty.

Half a can, gone.

When she asked what happened, her boyfriend shrugged. Said it “looked old” and he threw it away.

No discussion. No checking. Just gone.

Then she saw the trash.

The formula powder dumped out. Pacifiers thrown in with it. Everything mixed in with garbage.

At that point, the situation escalated quickly.

She reacted. Loudly. Angrily. And understandably so.

Her baby needed to eat. Something essential had been taken away without her consent.

Instead of recognizing that, her boyfriend’s mother stepped in, defending her son, backing up the decision, and turning the focus onto “respect” and tone.

When her baby started crying, the grandmother picked him up, further escalating the situation.

That’s when something primal kicked in.

This wasn’t just frustration anymore. It was fear.

She demanded her baby back. Loudly. Urgently. The kind of reaction that comes from instinct, not calculation.

And instead of de-escalating, the grandmother threatened to call the police.

At that point, the situation had crossed a line.

So she left.

Grabbed her baby, went to a friend’s house, and relied on a backup can of formula she happened to have in her diaper bag. A small detail that suddenly became critical.

Looking at the situation as a whole, the issue goes far beyond a single argument.

It’s about autonomy.

She made a medically informed, personally necessary decision about how to feed her child. That decision was dismissed, undermined, and ultimately sabotaged.

Throwing away formula isn’t just wasteful. It’s removing access to a baby’s food. In a moment where the baby needed it most.

The reactions afterward only deepened the problem. Minimizing what happened, calling her “dramatic,” and framing the situation as if she overreacted ignores the reality of what she walked into.

A hungry baby. No food. And no one taking responsibility.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

The overwhelming response was support for the mother. Many users called the behavior of the boyfriend and his family abusive, especially given the financial control and interference with feeding.

561Florida727 − Apply for WIC for your child’s food

misstiff1971 − Take your baby and go to your family or a friend. His family and him are toxic. Heck - go to a shelter and get it on record...

knitting-fool − Lawyer. Get sole custody. I breastfed my kid for 40 months and am a huge lactivist.

But FED is best. Breastfeeding was good for me, and anyone who wants to should be allowed to, but it's not right for everyone.

Others emphasized a simple truth, fed is best. Whether it’s breastfeeding or formula, the priority is a healthy baby and a functioning parent.

Cute-Profession9983 − Well, you were groomed and preyed upon, so it's not like you're dealing with good or decent people.

FewTelevision3921 − NTA and this is abuse on them. I'm going to guess that they are "religious" too.

Got to their pastor and his wife to sort this out. When the Dr and mom(you) agree it's nobody else's business.

TunedMassDamsel − NTA whatsoever. What kind of maniac harangues a new mother into breastfeeding when it doesn’t WORK for them? ?

Science milk is amazing and miraculous, a mother’s well-being is ALSO important to a baby’s development,

and formula is super freaking expensive and you do NOT throw that s__t away unless it’s actually screwed up.

OP, I’m sorry you have so many d__adful people telling you that you’re not doing what’s best for you and the baby by not breastfeeding.

You are absolutely doing what is the very best thing for the two of you. Hang in there and tell everyone else to f__k right off.

Several commenters urged her to seek outside help, apply for assistance programs, and consider legal advice.

[Reddit User] − 28 year old knocked up a 20 year old.....red flag.

Salt-Lengthiness-620 − NTA theyre abusive. Leave and run

abritinthebay − LAWYER

Safe_Departure8133 − Don’t go back: tell the doctor what they done

There are moments in parenting where instinct takes over. Not perfectly, not calmly, but clearly.

This was one of those moments.

A mother came home to find her baby’s food gone. She reacted the way someone does when something essential is taken away without warning.

The bigger question isn’t whether she yelled. It’s why she was put in that position to begin with.

Because support doesn’t look like control. And care doesn’t look like sabotage.

So what do you think, was this just a heated argument, or something that signals a much deeper problem?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/0 votes | 0%

CTV4

CTV4

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