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Teen Calls Out Religious Cousin’s Double Standards – Family Drama Erupts

by Sunny Nguyen
July 29, 2025
in Social Issues

Imagine living under constant judgment for simply enjoying anime or wearing skinny jeans, every move labeled a sin. That’s the reality for this 18-year-old Redditor, who’s been sharing a home with her conservative cousin and aunt from Saudi Arabia.

For the past year and a half, they’ve criticized her Canadian lifestyle, calling her choices “haram” at every turn. But when the cousin took up painting and was praised for it, OP snapped, pointing out that painting living things is also a sin in their faith. That one comment sparked a full-blown family feud.

Was it a petty clapback or overdue honesty? Let’s get into it.

Teen Calls Out Religious Cousin’s Double Standards - Family Drama Erupts

This Redditor’s story is more intense than a family game night gone wrong! Here’s the original post:

Aita For Telling My Cousin She’s Committing A Sin?

I'll try to keep this straight to the point but I (18F) can answer any questions you have. A year and a half ago, my cousin (17f) and aunt (50+) immigrated from Saudi Arabia. They have been living with my family and I in Canada ever since. It's been a real struggle for everyone to adjust.

Because they are way more religious than me, they see themselves as more superior. I can't read or write Arabic properly, so they say 'Oh poor OP, losing her faith and culture because she was born here' or they comment on the fact that I can't read the Qur'an in the original language. Everything I do, they comment on.

I watch a show, listen to music, dye my hair, wear skinny jeans, or anything remotely fun in front of them, and they give their opinion. ' Darling, this is Haram', 'sweetie, doing this is actually not permitted' , ' OP, you can't do this unless you want to go to hell'.

My parents have told me to keep the peace and that they'll soon get their own place. Since the whole lockdown, my cousin has taken up a new hobby- painting. She's actually really talented and I'm surprised she's never painted before.

I was watching anime in our shared room when she told me to turn it off. She said she can't concentrate listening to something Haram while she painted. I told her that she's also committing a sin by painting a girl.

(In Islam, drawing/painting any living thing is a sin) This lead to a whole fight and our parents got involved. Basically, they're telling me to apologize because her painting isn't harming anybody. My cousin has stopped talking to me because my aunt made her stop painting.

This caused problems between my parents and aunt because they're telling my aunt it's fine if she paints. Now there's tension in our house and my parents are kind of pissed at me. AITA for causing this fight? I admit I lost my temper, but after a year and a half of this, I couldn't take it anymore.

Also, my cousin was really good at painting and it was a way for her to get creative. I feel really bad now that she's not allowed.. Eta: not some Muslims getting triggered by this post lmao. Don't send me hate. I'm a crybaby

thanks all for your advice/comments! I really appreciate it. I'll have a talk with my parents tomorrow.

A Clash of Values in One Household

Living with judgmental relatives can wear down even the most patient soul, and that’s exactly where this Redditor found herself. For over a year, she’s shared a home with her ultra-conservative cousin and aunt from Saudi Arabia, whose strict religious beliefs frame everyday things like anime and dyed hair as spiritual offenses.

The cousin’s nonstop critiques finally hit a breaking point when she told OP to turn off her “Haram” anime while painting. That’s when OP fired back, pointing out that painting people is also considered sinful in many Islamic views. The fallout? A household blowout, a painting ban, and rising family tension.

Faith, Frustration, and the Search for Balance

From the cousin’s perspective, holding tightly to her faith might feel like the only stable thing in a brand-new culture. Her harsh opinions may come from fear of losing identity more than hostility. For OP, though, being judged at every turn becomes exhausting. Her reaction may have felt like justice in the moment, but it shut down something that brought her cousin joy.

According to a 2024 Journal of Cross-Cultural Psychology study, immigrant households often struggle with these clashes, especially when generations and values differ. As Dr. Amal Killawi explains in Psychology Today, real peace comes from setting kind but firm boundaries, not from competing over who’s more right. OP’s decision to talk with her parents is a promising step toward that middle ground.

Reddit’s serving up takes hotter than a summer falafel stand! Check out the top comments:

Check out how the community responded:

Redditors didn’t hold back, pointing out that if her cousin wanted to police others’ choices, she should’ve been ready to face some judgment herself.

Ilovegifsofjif − NTA If she's going to have a running commentary about how you're living she better expect to be held to that same standard.

[Reddit User] − NTA. Religion is so bizarre... so like, you can’t draw living things?

bradjanetrocky − NTA. What's the expression? Don't dish it if you can't take it. Or something like that. Lol.

engineerlady14 − NTA - you watching anime/dyeing your hair/etc wasn't 'harming anyone' either, but your aunt and cousin still found a reason to comment on it and shame you for it. I'm very much of the opinion live and let live (as long as you're not endangering anyone else).

Reddit weighed in with empathy and edge, some offered a path to reconciliation through honest dialogue, while others reminded OP that respect goes both ways, especially in someone else’s home.

ninaa1 − INFO: can you talk with one of your parents (whoever is more understanding of your modern life) about how wearing it is to be constantly criticized and how it feels like they are always watching and judging you?

Make a deal with them that you will apologize sincerely if they will talk with your guests and tell them to knock of the criticism, that they (your parents) are the ones raising you and will be the judge of your behavior (assuming your parents haven't had any issues with your clothing or hobbies).

Then you can find something to truly apologize for. Like maybe, sincerely apologize for snapping at your cousin, that you felt under attack constantly from their comments and you acted impulsively.

That you are sorry for your less-than-ideal communication and that you are sorry that your cousin is no longer allowed to paint, that you only wanted to show her how it felt to be criticized for doing something she enjoyed.

Tell them that you admire your cousin's skill and hope that she continues to practice freely, just as you enjoy practicing your hobbies without constraint as well. It is really difficult having additional people in the house for so long, especially when it's family and the boundaries are blurry. I hope things get better soon.

Ok_Yellow8056 − NTA. They can call you out, but you can't say anything to them? Music, clothing, and hair colors are ways people get creative too, and they had an issue with way you do so, sorry for it. You shouldn't have to apologize.

WonderingAhole − NTA There’s a way you speak to people, especially when you’re staying at their house. Your cousin and aunty are disrespectful. If she’s gonna point out all your sins then why can’t you do the same. Hers is arguably a bigger one if that’s what we’re doing here.

DiannaPhantom27 − NTA I’ve studied Islam in Uni, and from what I understand, the form of Islam practiced in Saudi Arabia is Wahhabism. One of the strictest forms of Islam and one that’s not practiced by the vast majority of Muslims. Would she go up to a Malaysian Muslim and complain about their colorful hijabs?

Or a Shia or Sufi Muslim and complain about their practices? Going to go up to a convert on the street and complain about her being white? Because seriously, if so, she’s going to have a long, stressful, and boring life. And it will be never ending.

Some Redditors weren’t shy about calling out the double standards. They praised OP for turning the tables, holding firm, and proving that even under pressure, she knew the rules better than her critics.

IDGamerdude − Lmao NTA. If they're so into this religion they at least should be able to follow the rules of the religion. Especially if they make fun of you for not knowing everything about Islam.

theproblem_solver − NTA. You held their hypocrisy up to their faces and their position on what is/isn't haram collapsed. Now they're forced to bend the rules 'just this once' to accommodate your cousin's painting hobby.

If they can bend rules 'just this once' then they no longer have a moral leg to stand on and can no longer be superior to you. Buckle up - things may become more intense at home.

Stick to your guns because what you're showing your aunt/cousin is that you may have 'lost your culture' by being raised outside Saudi, but you still know the core rules of your faith. By your one simple action, you kinda checkmated them and I love it.

Wizardwheel − NTA I could never imagine living in someone else’s home and telling them what is ok and not ok to do based on my religious beliefs, f**k that. They got a taste of their own medicine.

As far as apologies go, if your parents want you to apologize, tell them you will apologize to her if she and her parents won’t ever try to tell you how to live your life. It sucks for her that her parents aren’t allowing her to do what she wants but that isn’t your fault.

Are these Redditors painting a fair picture or just splashing shade? You decide!

This Redditor’s household drama paints a complex picture of faith, family, and boundaries. After weathering nonstop criticism, her clapback hit where it hurt—and now the fallout is real.

While her cousin’s silence and art ban sting, many would argue it was a long time coming. Still, the question stands: when your beliefs clash at home, should you keep the peace or call out the hypocrisy? Let us know how you’d navigate the tension.

Sunny Nguyen

Sunny Nguyen

Sunny Nguyen writes for DailyHighlight.com, focusing on social issues and the stories that matter most to everyday people. She’s passionate about uncovering voices and experiences that often go unheard, blending empathy with insight in every article. Outside of work, Sunny can be found wandering galleries, sipping coffee while people-watching, or snapping photos of everyday life - always chasing moments that reveal the world in a new light.

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