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Man Threatens To Disown 13-Year-Old Brother After He Called His Girlfriend A Dishwasher

by Annie Nguyen
July 22, 2025
in Social Issues

One Reddit user shared a family fiasco so awkward, it makes most holiday dinners look like spa retreats. What started as a wholesome night of bowling and burgers turned into a tension-packed stand-off between loyalty, responsibility, and one wildly inappropriate joke.

His girlfriend and 13-year-old brother had been getting along… until a nerdy debate over Stranger Things got too real. A harmless disagreement escalated when the brother called the girlfriend a “dishwasher.” Yep, that happened. One sexist, offhand jab later, the girlfriend stormed off, the brother tried to laugh it off, and the Redditor found himself in the emotional equivalent of a hostage situation—with no escape but the couch.

Want the juicy details? Dive into the original post and prepare to pick a side.

Man Threatens To Disown 13-Year-Old Brother After He Called His Girlfriend A Dishwasher

A young man found himself in the middle of a tug-of-war between his girlfriend and younger brother after the latter threw out a sexist jab mid-conversation

'Aita For Not Leaving My Brother Alone After He Called My Girlfriend A Dishwasher?'

I am 'babysitting' my little brother (13) while my parents are visiting a friend of theirs abroad who's in her deathbed. My gf and brother got along pretty well the past few days. Last night, we went bowling and then had dinner at a restaurant afterwards. It was a great night because we had so much fun.

We were walking back home after the dinner, my gf and brother were arguing about Stranger Things, it started as a fun little debate at first but when my girlfriend corrected himn he didn't like it so he told her 'What do you even know? You are just a dishwasher'. I was shocked and furious at him.

When he saw our reactions he tried to backtrack saying it was just a dumb joke that he didn't mean. I told him to shut up and went to catch my girlfriend because she walked away. I apologized for what he said and told her that he will do the same thing.

I knew that an apology wasn't enough so I promised her I will give him a stern talk and ground him for the remaining time he'd be staying with us.

She said that I didn't have to apologize because it wasn't my fault and that his apology wasn't going to be sincere so she asked me to leave him alone to teach him a lesson about not disrespecting women and throwing sexist insults.

I told her I can't do that because it was late and I wasn't comfortable leaving him alone especially since it was a 20 minute walk. She suggested I call an Uber for him because she wasn't going to walk back with him.

I refused again because he was my responsibility and I couldn't let him go with a stranger because if something happens to him my parents would never forgive me. She sarcastically told me it felt nice being supported by her boyfriend when she literally just got insulted.

She said that my brother wasn't a child and that many teenagers ride in Ubers alone but since I wasn't interested in going with her she'd call one for herself. During the walk back home I told my brother that if he insulted my gf or anyone else in my persence he could forget that I am his brother.

He started crying but I was so angry that I told him to save his tears because he should've regretted what he said because it was disrespectful and not because I threatened cutting him off.

I informed him that he would not be allowed to leave the room except for the bathroom or to eat until our parents come back so he kept sobbing the whole way back. When we arrived, my gf had just been dropped by her Uber.

It was very awkward because they both were angry at me and when we entered the house they directly went to the rooms and closed the doors. So now I can't sleep and had been just lying on the couch wondering what the f**k was I supposed to do.

Disagreements among family members are common—but throw in a teenager, a girlfriend, and a hint of misogyny, and the cocktail gets messy fast. In this situation, the Redditor had to make a snap judgment: protect his girlfriend’s dignity or ensure his little brother’s safety. He tried to do both. But in the heat of it, he may have gone too far.

The girlfriend’s anger was understandable. Nobody wants to be reduced to a household appliance during a casual debate. But suggesting a 13-year-old be left alone at night or sent off with an unknown Uber driver? That’s not a teaching moment—it’s reckless. As Clinical Psychologist Dr. Barbara Greenberg explains in a Psychology Today article, “Teens need boundaries and modeling—not rejection or humiliation. They’re watching how you react even more than what you say.”

The brother’s comment—clearly sexist and inappropriate—was likely parroted from peers or online culture. At 13, boys are still forming their worldview. Discipline at this age should be deliberate and educational, not emotionally punishing. Instead of berating him into tears or threatening estrangement, a more productive approach could have involved clear conversation about respect, paired with real consequences like limited screen time or writing a reflection letter.

Now let’s address the girlfriend’s take. Her demand that the brother be left behind wasn’t just impractical—it was borderline dangerous. According to a CNN report, Uber prohibits unaccompanied minors under 18 from riding without an adult. So even if she felt unheard or unsupported, putting a child at risk was never a viable solution.

As for the Redditor himself? He was clearly torn—trying to act responsibly while juggling the emotional fallout. But in losing his temper, threatening to “cut off” his brother, and isolating him for days, he replaced guidance with guilt. Family therapist Dr. Laura Markham notes in her article for Aha Parenting, “Punishment teaches kids to avoid getting caught, not to make better decisions.” In short: the punishment may have landed, but the lesson probably didn’t.

The biggest takeaway? Emotional intelligence in moments of conflict—especially involving children—isn’t optional. It’s what separates a teaching moment from lasting damage. Everyone in this story needs to cool off, reconnect, and find better ways to handle disrespect that don’t include abandonment, sarcasm, or dramatic threats.

Reddit wasn’t exactly gentle with their judgment—opinions rolled in with fire, sass, and sharp moral clarity.

Some users sided with the Redditor, praising his protective instincts

ParticularReview4129 − NTA. Your 13 yr old brother is still very much a child. He overstepped but beyond a word of correction this doesn't have to be 'scorched earth'. He needs to apologize. Your gf however is supposed to be an adult. She was out of line expecting you to abandon your brother on the sidewalk. She's TA for that. Now she is pouting in her room. Another childish act.

StringBean_GreenBean − NTA, but let me break it down based on the info you gave. It is not OK to abandon your child in the street at night, regardless of what they did.

Discipline is not n**lect, and to make your sibling, who you are responsible for, take an Uber home while you side with your GF, who I assume is a grown woman, would be neglectful and dangerous.

Ubering a child at home at night can not be completely safe, and abandoning your brother in the street to walk home alone teaches him nothing except that he can't depend on you. I'm concerned that your GF thought that was a suitable punishment.

Your brother is a teenager and will make stupid edgy jokes, but you correct that behavior at home. Grounding him is a step, but you probably need to discuss with him multiple times to get him to understand that making comments like that is not OK. It's not going to be an overnight fix because that language is something he's picked up from outside sources or peers. NTA for taking your brother home.

angelcasablancarose − NTA, but your brother has to apologize. Your girlfriend saying to leave him to teach him a lesson… is a red flag to be honest… who in the right mind would discipline someone that way? Especially if it’s a child and it’s late at night.

[Reddit User] − NTA. Your girlfriend was acting like a 13 year old by throwing a tantrum and telling you to leave your little brother alone at night.

Others thought the girlfriend was being dramatic

jharpe18 − Is she insane? Her response was ridiculous. Being upset was fine, but everything else was so out of line. You can't just leave a 13yo to wander the street at night or give him to a stranger. That's just begging for something bad to happen to him. He shouldn't have made that joke, so he's an AH.

Threatening to basically disown him was way too harsh, though. It was one incident with one insult. That is going to really mess him up. Basically says you would stop loving him without a second thought.

Large-Ingenuity6899 − ESH- You're right your bother went over the line and berated your girlfriend with a sexist insult. He should be repremanded and corrected for his behavior. Your girlfriend had a right to be offended, but to go as far as to give you an ultimatum is s**tty. The kid is 13.

He needs adult supervision or at least needs someone old enough to look out for him and that's you. I think you went a bit over the line with your borther in terms of punishment. I think saying something as far as cutting him off is a bit much.

Again he's 13 he doesn't know better, and he should be taught to improve himself. You shouldve taken this moment as a teaching opprotunity that the things he says have consequences, and he shouldn't berate women.

Yeah I checked back a few times and was rather surprised a lot of people glossed over the face that OP threatened to cut his brother off for something like this. A kid is a kid, he should be tought proper, but honestly no matter how many times he'd make a mistake like this.

I'd never threaten to cut my own brother off at this age because it proves to your brother your relationship isn't as strong as he tought. If he was a grown adult (25+) and this behavior was typical of him, sure, but his brother isn't that age.

Many agreed that both adults failed to handle the situation with maturity

PhoenixEcho1 − ESH. Your brother said and did something stupid, which is to be expected of a child his age. It doesn't excuse his behavior, but that's part of growing up. Sometimes you have to do something stupid in order to learn something. Your girlfriend, who's supposed to be an adult, is a clueless moron.

I don't give two shits at how angry she is at the kid. You don't just up and abandon a child when they misbehave. That not only doesn't teach them anything but it's downright dangerous.

Because if something happened to him, it would be on the two of you because as the adults, you're responsible for him until your parents get back. You on the other hand, calm down and take a look at yourself in the mirror.

You might've acted responsibly when it came to staying with your brother but not when it came to disciplining him. First off, NEVER punish in anger. Because you can and will say something that you'll regret later, such as your stupid threat to cut him off if he said something you didn't like.

And trust me, once you actually calm down and think about the situation, you will regret saying that. As for the rest, you need to talk to your brother, explain to him why his actions were wrong. As in, actually communicate and not just punish.

As he's not gonna learn anything from this except that his older brother just screams at him and will cut him off if he does something you think is wrong.

[Reddit User] − ESH your girlfriend was being ridiculous expecting you to potentially put your brother at risk to teach him a lesson. Obviously your brother was rude and disrespectful.

You only a tiny bit but I don’t agree with teaching a child (yeah he is old enough to know better but is still a child) that your love is conditional. I don’t think this warrants telling him he isn’t worth loving. Tell him his behaviour is the issue, not him as a person.

Several users pointed out that the Redditor’s punishment was overkill

QueenKeisha − YTA- you were WAY WAY WAY too hard on him! NO! Do not leave him. What you said, way too harsh. Can’t leave his room until they get back? Did he k**l someone’s pet?

Your girlfriend, suggesting you leave your 13 year old brother alone, scared, St night to walk home alone, needs to never be left alone with any child, including her own. That’s not punishment, that’s torture. What kind of messed up human leaves a scared not to walk home alone? And when he started crying, it’s when you STOP.

Yes it was a messed up comment, but that doesn’t give you the right to berate him until he cries, and continue after that until you get home.

What both of you did, everything, threatening to leave him, yelling at him after he’s crying, grounding him until your parents are back, all of it was far beyond anything considered reasonable.

ellalovesyouso − ESH. mainly you and your gf though considering your supposed to be adults and he’s a kid. saying you’d disown him and made him cry then continued on is so out of line, although what he said is still very wrong and sexist he’s a KID. there’s room for mistakes and a proper punishment would’ve been fine, not being verbally mean. your girlfriend is insane and way out of line.

she’s 21 for crying out loud a 13 year old calling her a stupid sexist insult is not the end of the world for her and in NO way is child abandonment aka abuse a proper punishment.

A few were bluntly worried about the long-term impact

politicalopinion − What has this sub come to where a brother who tells his 13 year old sibling he could forget that I am his brother. He started crying but I was so angry that I told him to save his tears because he should've regretted what he said because it was disrespectful and not because I threatened cutting him off. is ok. OP you are a horrible brother. Your brother said something bad. He is 13.

He's a child who said something edgy because he is impulsive and doesn't understand the gravity or consequences of it, and you responded by threatening to abandon him and hate him forever. Oh, and as soon as he realized you thought it was an awful thing he tired to apologize. What a horrible brother you are.

In 10 years when your GF is a distant memory you are going to regret this. This is going to be a memory you think about and cringe about the rest of your life. At least you didn't just blindly listen to your GF, but seriously awful job by you. Fix this. Oh and obviously YTA.

This post wasn’t just about a kid using bad language—it exposed how quickly people can overreact, mismanage emotions, and forget the stakes when egos collide. The brother crossed a line. But the adults in the room tripped over it, too.

So what do you think? Did the Redditor act like a responsible sibling under pressure, or did he let anger cloud his judgment? And was the girlfriend’s response an act of principle—or petty overreach? Share your take in the comments below!

Annie Nguyen

Annie Nguyen

Hi, I'm Annie Nguyen. I'm a freelance writer and editor for Daily Highlight with experience across lifestyle, wellness, and personal growth publications. Living in San Francisco gives me endless inspiration, from cozy coffee shop corners to weekend hikes along the coast. Thanks for reading!

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