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Esthetician Calls Daughter’s Skin ‘Unhealthy’ And Refuses To Use Her In Business Photos, Is She Wrong?

by Katy Nguyen
December 12, 2025
in Social Issues

Running a business is often about making tough choices, and for this esthetician, one such decision came when she asked her niece to model for updated photos on her website.

The reasoning was practical: her niece’s features aligned better with her clientele, many of whom are Middle Eastern women. However, when her daughter found out, she felt rejected and hurt by her mother’s candid explanation.

The fallout was immediate, with her daughter crying and accusing her of favoritism.

Esthetician Calls Daughter’s Skin ‘Unhealthy’ And Refuses To Use Her In Business Photos, Is She Wrong?
Not the actual photo

'AITA for “calling my niece prettier than my daughter”?'

I’m an esthetician. Some of the services I provide are waxing and facials.

The pictures on my website and in my waiting room desperately needed to be updated so I asked my niece (19) if I could get pictures of her in exchange...

My niece is a very beautiful girl with nearly perfect skin and very thick dark eyebrows.

She’s also part Middle Eastern and has a lot of those features, which is important to me since most of my clients are Middle Eastern women.

My daughter (17) heard about me using my niece’s pictures and asked why I didn’t ask her.

I tried to be vague and say niece’s skin color and features matched what I was looking for and fit my clients better but

she kept pressing and refused to take the answers I gave her until I finally snapped and told her that

I won’t be using her she doesn’t take care of her skin and it shows and because drawn on eyebrows will not help me at all.

She started crying, thinks I called her ugly, and says I favor my niece over her. She’s refusing to talk to me, and she got my parents on her side.

They think I should’ve done both the girls or neither because it’s not fair, but this is business, and not everything is fair in business.

What began as a business‑oriented choice quickly escalated into an emotional family conflict because it tapped into deeply rooted issues around appearance, self‑esteem, and perceived parental favoritism.

The OP’s decision to use their niece’s images for the esthetician’s marketing reflected professional reasoning: their niece’s look matched the demographics of the clients they serve.

In commerce, aligning promotional material with a target audience is common practice and often determines client engagement.

However, when these choices are communicated in a family setting, especially to a teenage daughter, they can be easily interpreted as judgments on personal worth or beauty.

Adolescence is a period when young people’s body image and self‑esteem are closely linked, and comparisons, whether intended as business rationale or not, can have emotional consequences.

Research shows that adolescents with greater body dissatisfaction tend to report lower self‑esteem, particularly when comparisons to idealized images are frequent, whether from peers, media, or, in some cases, family members.

Perceived parental favoritism also plays a significant role in sibling dynamics and self‑perception.

Studies investigating familial relationships indicate that when one child is seen as preferred, whether through affection, praise, or in this case, public presentation, it can contribute to feelings of marginalization in the other child.

This perception of favoritism has been linked to lower self‑esteem and increased sibling rivalry or resentment.

In a family context, even unintended actions can be interpreted through the lens of who gets attention or recognition, reinforcing sensitive self‑evaluations tied to appearance and acceptance.

Beyond familial dynamics, societal and media influences also affect how adolescents evaluate their own looks.

Research on social media’s impact finds that exposure to idealized images, whether from influencers, filtered photos, or professional portrayals, can exacerbate body image concerns and contribute to negative self‑esteem outcomes among young people.

While the OP’s situation did not involve social media, the underlying psychological mechanisms are similar, seeing someone else’s image presented publicly in a beauty or aesthetic context can unintentionally trigger comparisons that resonate deeply with a teenager’s developing self‑image.

Given these insights, the OP’s instinct to protect the business’s professional image is understandable, yet the manner of communication with her daughter was the pivot point of emotional fallout.

Acknowledging her daughter’s feelings and perspective first, before explaining the business reasoning, could have mitigated hurt and prevented the sense of personal judgment.

Relationship experts emphasize that validating feelings, “I hear that this made you feel hurt or left out”, strengthens connection, especially in emotionally charged situations.

Once a person feels understood, they are more receptive to explanations about context and reasoning.

For the OP, a constructive path forward lies in open dialogue and reassurance.

Apologizing for the hurtful tone of the comment, not necessarily the business decision itself, can support her daughter’s emotional well‑being.

Sharing the logic behind the marketing choice while reaffirming to her daughter that beauty, effort, and care are not defined solely by someone’s current skin condition or eyebrow style can help rebuild trust.

Moreover, involving her daughter in future business reflections, perhaps inviting her to offer input on imagery choices or even collaborating in another way, might transform the situation into an opportunity for positive engagement rather than competition or comparison.

In essence, the OP’s experience highlights a broader truth: family dynamics often interact with professional roles in complex ways, and without careful communication, even neutral decisions can be interpreted as personal slights.

Being mindful of how messages are framed, especially when they touch on appearance and identity, allows families to navigate the intersection of business and personal life more harmoniously, supporting emotional resilience and mutual respect.

Here’s what people had to say to OP:

These commenters collectively slammed the OP for how they spoke to their daughter.

madelinegumbo − YTA. You should make it clear on your website that it's only worth booking your services if your skin is already nearly perfect.

Informal-Chemist5895 − YTA for what you said to your daughter. As someone who has struggled with bad skin

all their life from hormonal imbalances, and it has nothing to do with how I take care of my skin, it would devastate me

if my mom told me I have bad skin, even though it's true.

You’re her mother, you’re supposed to make her feel like she’s the most beautiful, smartest, most capable person in the world.

You have just given her a reason to believe in her insecurities.

Relevant_Birthday516 − I finally snapped and told her that I won’t be using her, she doesn’t take care of her skin, and it shows,

and drawn-on eyebrows will not help me at all.

Yeah YTA. You're the grown-up (theoretically at least), and something tells me this isn't the first time you've

favoured niece over your daughter because of her appearance.

You had so many other options, you didn't want to exploit your own daughter, you needed (as you said)

a more Middle Eastern skin tone, or even, gods forbid, you could have acted like the actual adult and just said

"that's my final decision and I'm not changing it".

Not everything is fair in business. In ten or twenty years, your daughter will parrot this back at you when you say it isn't fair, she doesn't come visit.

Additional_Reserve30 − Of course, YTA. Your daughter isn’t stupid, that’s why she wasn’t accepting your initial answers.

Then you snapped at her and confirmed her worst fears. Congratulations.

This might be the first time I’ve actually witnessed the birth of a young woman’s insecurities at the hands of her toxic mom.

[Reddit User] − YTA, why could you not explain to her that you were looking to advertise to specific ethnicities and

therefore needed said ethnicity's specific physical features?

Instead, you went ahead and decided to be a jerk to your own daughter.

PinkNGreenFluoride − YTA. What is wrong with you? This is how you speak to your child? "Not everything is fair in business".

This isn't actually about your business; it's about your parenting. And, wow, you've really stepped in it here on that front.

FFS, half your post is just waxing poetic about how beautiful your niece is.

These Redditors expressed that the OP missed a valuable opportunity to include her daughter in a positive way, showing a range of people in her business’s advertising.

JaneDoe_83 − I was going to vote YTA from the title alone…

Now that I’ve read your post, I’m doubling down on that. You are indeed the AH. YTA all the way.

I have questions, but realistically, the one that I’d really like answering is: as an aesthetician (I’m UK, so leave my spelling alone),

would you not be the best person qualified to help if your daughter really does have bad skin?

One would have thought that with your job, you’re in the best place to help her out, if it’s truly a problem.

But with or without an answer, you were most definitely an a__hole here. You should and could have just paid

a model to do this, so as not to cause a divide in your family.

Optycalillusion − YTA. My heart hurts for your daughter. What a cruel and unnecessary response.

I see no reason why you couldn't use both girls' photos.

You had an opportunity to boost your daughter's self-esteem AND show an INCLUSIVE aspect of your business

by having photos of different types of people and not just the "perfect" ones. MAJOR YTA.

Basic_Fold_9217 − YTA. How else was your daughter supposed to interpret what you said to her?

And news flash, but not every client that walks through those doors is going to have ‘nearly perfect skin’,

good business is showing that you work with all sorts of skin types.

Also, your relationship with your daughter is more important than business at the end of the day.

She probably just wanted to be included and feel cared for by her mom. Wouldn’t have killed you to do so.

Didntlikedefaultname − YTA for not paying for an actual model and making this awkward for your family.

thirdtryisthecharm − YTA. Some things really should not be said, and this was one of them.

Marple1102 − YTA. Who uses the phrase “it’s just business” or “it’s a business” in relation to their own child? Yikes.

These users took a more nuanced approach, agreeing that the OP could have handled the situation better but acknowledging the frustration the daughter caused by repeatedly pushing the issue.

Missmagentamel − NTA. Your niece has the look you're going for, and your daughter wouldn't take the reason you gave her...

She shouldn't have pushed it.

JimJam4603 − Wow, weird responses. Of course, you’re NTA. You made a business decision.

She pushed and pushed because she wanted you to say the hurtful thing. That’s her fault.

ramessides − ESH. Look, I get the Y-T-A votes, but your daughter is seventeen and old enough not to know to push like she was.

She asked, you gave an answer that, realistically, while maybe vague, does make sense: your niece is part Middle Eastern,

and the bulk of your clients are Middle Eastern.

She then continued to push, and push, and push, refusing to accept an answer until you snapped and gave her

the answer she was likely angling for anyway, even if she didn’t really want to hear it.

If you’re going to keep pushing and badgering people like that, then you shouldn’t be surprised when they snap, sorry.

”Ask stupid questions,” as the saying goes, except she was asking them over and over, and over.

That said, you’re still the parent, and what you ended up saying was needlessly cruel.

You could have phrased it much better, though I understand you were frustrated by your daughter’s continuing

need to push the matter and her refusal to accept the answers she was given.

Your parents also suck because I don’t think their ”you should have done both the girls or neither because it’s not fair!” argument is valid.

Not everything in life is fair. I’m mixed-race, and my cousins on one side are “so white they don’t even make foundation

for skin as pale as mine,” in the words of one of my cousins.

Sometimes things are different.

Your clients are mostly Middle Eastern women, and your niece looks and is half-Middle Eastern.

I know a guy who launched a makeup startup for native women and was asked to model them at the very beginning

before he could afford actual models, because I’m indigenous myself.

My cousin didn’t get mad about it because the line is geared towards native women, and she’s not native. She understood that.

Also, if your daughter is genuinely refusing to take care of her skin (as opposed to simply having ”bad skin” even though she tries),

then that’s the consequence of her own actions.

I’m very sympathetic to people who just have problem skin through no fault of their own, but I’m less sympathetic to

people who have bad skin due to their own refusal to take care of it properly.

That’s assuming what you said was true, of course.

This situation stings because the OP’s comment unintentionally cut deep, especially as it involved comparing the physical appearance of her own daughter to her niece.

Was the OP’s business choice justified, or did she go too far in her delivery? How would you balance business with family? Share your thoughts below.

Katy Nguyen

Katy Nguyen

Hey there! I’m Katy Nguyễn, a writer at Dailyhighlight.com. I’m a woman in my 30s with a passion for storytelling and a degree in Journalism. My goal is to craft engaging, heartfelt articles that resonate with our readers, whether I’m diving into the latest lifestyle trends, exploring travel adventures, or sharing tips on personal growth. I’ve written about everything from cozy coffee shop vibes to navigating career changes with confidence. When I’m not typing away, you’ll likely find me sipping a matcha latte, strolling through local markets, or curled up with a good book under fairy lights. I love sunrises, yoga, and chasing moments of inspiration.

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