Affair Partner Says Baby Deserves That Money, Ex-Wife Says Absolutely Not

A divorced woman thought she had finally moved on, until LinkedIn of all places dragged her back into the past.

Years ago, she discovered her husband’s affair when he accidentally texted her instead of the other woman. The marriage ended, but the divorce stayed civil. He had built a lot of wealth, and she received half, plus extra property as an apology. She became a silent partner in his company, kept her career, and never spoke to him again.

Now his affair partner, still with him and currently pregnant, has tracked her down online. The message? The divorce cost him so much that he refuses to marry or live with her, and somehow that is the ex-wife’s fault. The girlfriend calls her a thief, says she took “everything,” and claims she is robbing this unborn baby of a family.

The ex-wife feels shaken and guilty, even though she only accepted a legal settlement after betrayal.

Now, read the full story:

Reading this feels like watching an old wound get poked by someone who did not even suffer the original injury.

You endured betrayal, divorce, and the emotional fallout that came with leaving a long marriage. You accepted a settlement that reflected both the law and your ex’s guilt. You did not force him to cheat. You did not force him to apologize with extra property. He made those choices.

Now his girlfriend chooses to blame you for his refusal to marry her or live with her, instead of looking at his character. She knew he was married when she got involved, then felt shocked when long term trust and commitment seem hard to get from him.

Your guilt makes sense emotionally, even though it does not fit logically. Betrayed partners often carry shame that belongs to the cheater. Hearing “you took everything” scratches that scar.

This feeling of doubt, after you already survived the worst, is very common in high conflict divorces and affair fallout.

This situation sits at the intersection of three big themes. Infidelity and consequences. Financial settlements in divorce. And misplaced blame from third parties.

First, the legal piece. In most countries and many U.S. states, assets acquired during the marriage count as marital property. Both spouses contribute, even if one brings in more income. One partner may build a company, while the other holds the household together, supports careers, or sacrifices their own professional growth.

Courts and divorce lawyers recognize that.

Accepting half of marital property in a long marriage does not equal “stealing.” It reflects a legal and ethical framework that treats marriage as a partnership, not an employer and employee.

On top of that, your ex chose to give you more. He offered the apartment and lake house as an apology. That decision reveals two things. He understood he did serious harm. And he wanted to give you financial security after breaking your trust.

So when the girlfriend says, “everything was his,” she strips out the reality of the marriage. She talks as if you stood outside his life, when you actually shared it for years.

Second, the emotional side. People who cheat and then stay with the affair partner often carry mixed feelings. Guilt. Fear of losing money. Fear of repeating the same pattern.

A lot of them quietly decide to avoid legal commitment again. They might say “I do not believe in marriage anymore” or “divorce cost me too much.” That often hides a deeper belief: “I do not want to risk half my assets again.”

That mindset already existed in your ex. The girlfriend did not create that. You did not create that. His actions and choices created that.

Instead of looking at his character and his history, she projects her frustration onto you. She frames her situation as “your divorce took my wedding and my home.” That narrative protects her ego. It lets her stay with him while avoiding hard questions.

Why does he hesitate to commit to me?

Why did he cheat on his wife?

What patterns in him scare me?

Those questions feel painful. Blaming you feels easier.

Third, boundaries and contact. You have not spoken to him in five years. You do not reply to his New Year texts, even though they tug at your heart. You did not chase him, threaten him, or drag him through court for more. You simply accepted a legal division and moved on.

He and his girlfriend, however, did not fully move on. He still reaches out emotionally once a year. She reaches out financially and emotionally now, during pregnancy, when fears about stability feel strongest.

Healthy practice would look different. If she has an issue with her relationship, she should address it with him. If he regrets his settlement, he should discuss it with a lawyer, not an ex he cheated on.

Instead they pull you back into their dynamic and try to make you carry emotional weight that belongs to them.

So what now?

From a psychological and practical standpoint, the healthiest steps look simple.

Recognize that you did not “take advantage” of him.

You accepted both legal and moral consequences of his behavior.

Recognize that she chooses to stay with a man who already showed how he handles commitment.

Her baby still has a father. The child can have love, time, and support, even if the parents never share a lease or a marriage certificate.

Family does not vanish because a wedding never happens.

If you respond at all, you keep it minimal.

You can say, “This is a matter between you and him. Please do not contact me again.” Then block and move on.

You do not owe explanations, apologies, or money.

The core message here: consequences of betrayal do not disappear just because a new partner feels frustrated with them. You did not ruin her chances at a family. Her partner’s decisions, past and present, shape that reality.

Check out how the community responded:

Reddit did not hold back. Many felt the affair partner created her own mess and now wants the ex-wife to clean it up.

Others underlined the simple truth: marital assets belong to both spouses.

Some people suggested one short, practical move, then disappearing again.

This story shows how fallout from an affair can echo for years, even when the betrayed partner did everything possible to move on. You ended the marriage, accepted a fair and even generous settlement, and built a life that does not rely on your ex. That took strength.

Now his girlfriend, who once played a role in the destruction of your marriage, wants you to feel guilty for the fact that consequences exist. She wants the benefits of a long commitment without the risk he fears. Instead of examining his track record or her own choices, she points at you.

You did not cause his reluctance to marry again. His behavior, his guilt, and his fear of losing money shaped that. You do not owe her money, reassurance, or emotional labor. You owe yourself peace.

So what do you think? Should OP send one short “do not contact me” message and block, or should she quietly block without a word? If you were in her place, would you ever answer the girlfriend at all?