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Boss Says “No Prayer at Dinner” at End-of-Year Party and Staff Walk Out

by Charles Butler
November 21, 2025
in Social Issues

“A festive meal turned into a faith confrontation.”

You run a business of about 50 employees and you genuinely believe you’re an accommodating boss. Every year you and your wife host a holiday party: catered, casual, inclusive. You’ve always aimed to treat it as a celebration for everyone—regardless of culture or religion.

Then this year something changed. A new interest bubbled up among some employees: “Will you say a grace before the meal?” That surprise request made you pause.

You checked tradition: no prayer had ever been part of the dinner. You politely declined their public grace request, offering them the chance to pray quietly or separately. They weren’t satisfied.

By Monday, five of them resigned. The party you planned for all turned into a resignation cascade and a lesson in how celebrations can split rather than unite.

Now, read the full story:

Boss Says “No Prayer at Dinner” at End-of-Year Party and Staff Walk Out
Not the actual photoAITA for not allowing some of my employees to say grace at our holiday party?

I (48M) own my own business and have about 50 employees that work for me. I like to think I am a pretty open and accommodating employer and try to...

Every year my wife and I host a holiday party that includes a catered meal and dessert.

From the very beginning, it has always been presented as a holiday party that doesn’t favor one culture or specific holiday over another since we’ve always had employees from various...

and most have a major holiday in either December or January. It’s meant to just be a celebration with everyone to have a good time at the end of the...

We held our holiday party this weekend and after announcing that dinner was going to be served in a few minutes and for everyone to make their way to the...

one of our new employees and some of our older employees came to ask us if I would say grace or would let one of them say grace before the...

I was pretty surprised at this request especially coming from employees that have been with us for years and they know we have never had a prayer before eating in...

so I wasn’t sure why they would suddenly ask now.

I told them no and some of them said it was important to them and their families to always say grace before a meal.

I asked what spurred this sudden request and they told me they had been talking about how they found it weird that my wife and I go to church but...

I told them that is because our private life is our private life and does not belong mixing with our professional life,

and that they were free to hold a prayer circle outside of the dining room with their families or do it quietly at the tables by themselves.

I thought that was the end of that but when I arrived at work this morning all five that asked on Saturday handed in their two-week notice citing that they...

one of them has worked for me for the last 9 years. I understand it may not have been what they wanted to hear but I was trying to look...

My wife is trying to get them to stay on board. AITA for not letting them say grace aloud with everyone at dinner?

ETA: Thanks for the responses. I talked to my wife on our way home and she has agreed to just let them go so they can find a better fitting...

She did say during her talks with some of them about why they were leaving was that they could not in good faith work for someone who did not live...

and it was our new hire that had started the topic with the others.

I will give the others good recommendations if they use us for a reference but probably not her since that was pretty unprofessional of her.

Reading this made me feel for everyone involved, both you as the employer trying to keep things inclusive, and the employees who felt their faith was sidelined. You’re clearly aiming for fairness across employees, but the fallout shows just how textured workplace traditions can be.

I also sensed the emotional sting from those employees, they asked for something meaningful to them, saw the refusal, and responded by quitting. That’s real.

This feeling of “I believed I could please everyone” crashing into “something important to some is invisible to others” is classic in diverse workplaces. You tried neutrality and got resentment. That doesn’t mean you were wrong, it just means tensions were deeper than you realized.

In today’s increasingly diverse workforce, year-end holiday events can become flash points for inclusion, religion, and professional boundaries.

The first key issue is religious expression at workplace events. U.K. guidance on religion or belief in the workplace states: “Employers do not have to automatically agree to accommodate prayer during work time, but must ensure they are not unlawfully discriminating.”

In the U.S., workplace holiday parties remain subject to the same non-discrimination standards as regular work events, meaning that if an event appears to favor one religion, it could trigger discrimination concerns.

Your choice to offer the employees the option of silent personal prayer or gathering externally shows you considered accommodation. According to an HR blog on workplace prayer rules: “Yes, employees have a right to pray at work, but group prayer cannot be forced and may be denied if it causes undue hardship.”

Here are the dynamics at play:

1. Inclusivity vs. endorsement. You presented the party as religion-neutral so all cultures felt welcome. If you permitted a public grace led by some employees, you would be implicitly endorsing a religious practice in a professional event, which could make non-participating employees feel excluded.

2. Voluntariness and workplace context. The employees asked to lead the grace. They weren’t coerced, but you concluded that the event context, being a company-hosted meal, makes group prayer less voluntary for others who might feel pressured. Your refusal draws a line between personal faith and collective workplace ritual.

3. Employee exit and morale. Five employees resigning immediately signals a notable turnover cost. But turnover may result from a clash of values rather than a mere policy. You introduced clarity: your private faith remains private, professional celebrations remain neutral.

Here is my advice for this situation:

  • Communicate ahead of time. Before next year’s party, send a memo stating the event is inclusive and no one ritual will be used to start the meal. Offer an optional quiet space for personal reflection.

  • Design optional rituals. You might provide a “moment of silence” before the meal, rather than a prayer, so that anyone of any faith or none can participate comfortably.

  • Re-evaluate accommodations. If a group wants to pray together, consider allowing it in a separate designated area, away from the main table, clearly voluntary and not part of the official agenda.

  • Capture feedback. If multiple employees still feel strongly, invite a diverse group to participate in party planning next year to reflect various perspectives.

Your story teaches a broader lesson: creating a truly inclusive workplace event often means preserving neutrality, not from disfavoring any belief, but from elevating one among many.

Managing religious expression in the workplace doesn’t mean suppressing faith. It means balancing personal freedom with collective comfort. By the measure of workplace practice and law, you handled the request responsibly.

Check out how the community responded:

“Boss did nothing wrong – smart, inclusive choice.”

AbroadTemporary5359 - NTA. This is a work environment and you gave them the option of praying amongst themselves and they turned that down (oddly).

So what exactly was their issue? You accommodated their request while still working respectfully.

[Reddit User] - NTA. I am a Christian but this is uncool. Prayer doesn’t need to be showy. They can pray silently to themselves …

Blessing the food before eating publicly would not be inclusive. You’re a good boss in this regard, sir.

Sunny_Hill_1 - NTA. It’s really awkward for the non-Christian coworkers when someone injects a very Christian grace at public events. Privately, fine; professionally, better to stay religion-neutral.

Diligent-Activity-70 - NTA. They could have had a quiet moment of prayer on their own. If you had suddenly sprung a public prayer on the group there’d be alienation. It...

Several said the resignations only revealed deeper issues, especially the new hire influencing the group.

FoolMe1nceShameOnU - NTA. You told them they were welcome to bless their food privately or outside. The issue is the public ritual forced onto a mixed audience. You did the...

clekas - NTA. Your non-Christian employees likely appreciate your stance more than you realize. Many feel pressure to conform. You kept things inclusive.

[Reddit User] - NTA. Not everyone is Christian or non-believer. You handled this well. Coming across as “we must pray now” at work is a problem. Their quitting is their...

Adventurous_House527 - NTA. It was a power move. Religion + workplace = risky. You offered accommodation. They pushed. They lost.

Arbor_Arabicae - NTA. I’m deeply religious and in a workplace I would not expect to lead a public grace. Your compromise was tactful and appropriate.

You acted with fairness, respect, and an eye toward inclusivity. That doesn’t erase the sadness of losing five employees this week, but it does highlight a principle: when faith and workplace converge, clarity matters. You didn’t denigrate their beliefs, you simply kept the official event faith-equitable.

What do you think? If you were in their shoes, would you have accepted a silent option or still asked for a public prayer? And for employers, how would you plan a holiday event that respects faith without creating division?

Charles Butler

Charles Butler

Hey there, fellow spotlight seekers! As the PIC of our social issues beat—and a guy who's dived headfirst into journalism and media studies—I'm obsessed with unpacking how we chase thrills, swap stories, and tangle with the big, messy debates of inequality, justice, and resilience, whether on screens or over drinks in a dive bar. Life's an endless, twisty reel, so I love spotlighting its rawest edges in words. Growing up on early internet forums and endless news scrolls, I'm forever blending my inner fact-hoarder with the restless wanderer itching to uncover every hidden corner of the world.

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