A Redditor walked into wedding planning that’d make even a soap opera scream. Picture this: wedding bells, tricky guests, and a request so bizarre it demands popcorn.
Focusing on a small, romantic ceremony of 30–50 loved ones, she was taken aback when her future mother-in-law asked to display framed photos of her miscarried children in pews—and save seats at the reception. Husband-to-be agreed it felt eerie, but pushed a “compromise.” Drama erupted. Want the full scoop? Dive into the original story below!
Here’s how one couple tried to draw healthy personal boundaries—until things got very awkward
Weddings are celebrations of love—and memories of those lost may also find a gentle place. However, context, sensitivity, and tone matter. According to WeddingWire, “Keep it discreet… a photo locket on your bouquet” instead of an overt display. Brides.com echoes this, noting a memorial table should be “visible yet not the main attraction”.
In the Reddit OP’s case, setting aside three seats and photos for miscarried babies in a small, intimate wedding is not discreet—it risks commanding attention away from the couple’s celebration. The Guardian (2015) also cautions to keep memoriam notes short, so the ceremony doesn’t become overshadowed by memorial tones.
Professional planner Sarah Reynolds recommends subtlety—think small table, engraved name tags or candles—allowing memory without imposing grief on attending guests. That aligns with thought leaders like Emily Post and Letitia Baldridge, who emphasize etiquette grounded in kindness, balance, and respect.
Still, honoring miscarried children reminds MIL of grief—and she may feel invisible at the wedding without them. Counselling expert Shelby Forsythia advises grief acknowledgment, but warns of triggering emotional waves if done too overtly.
Advice: A thoughtful middle ground is best. Options could include a small “In Loving Memory” section in the wedding program, or a single seat with a discreet inscription. Invite MIL to speak briefly during a toast instead. That honors the children respectfully—but still keeps focus on the couple’s celebration.
Netizens were quick to weigh in—the majority sided swiftly with the bride, calling the photo request “weird” and “creepy”:
A Reddit user called the photo idea creepy, fully backing the Redditor.
A Reddit user warned of trauma for guests, urging firm boundaries.
Attitude_devant saw this as a test for the fiancé, questioning his support.
PikesPique suggested a program memorial instead, noting MIL’s need for help.
DCNumberNerd proposed a speech to honor MIL’s loss, avoiding photos.
Timbrelyn suggested eloping to dodge the disturbing request.
Beat_The_Game emphasized the wedding’s joyful focus, calling MIL’s ask disrespectful.
RuReddy4thisJelly offered a subtle memorial table with candles as a compromise.
Suddenly-scrooge flagged MIL’s request as part of broader family oddities.
Party_Werewolf_358 recoiled at reserving seats for deceased babies.
When wedding plans collide with grief, it’s not always a fairy tale—but resolution is possible. In this case, the bride refused to allow that seat reservation and photo display, standing firm on what felt right for their celebration. That doesn’t erase the MIL’s grief, but it keeps the wedding focused on the couple.
Do you think she was too harsh? Is there a gentler way to respect lost children at a wedding? Share your thoughts below!