The holiday season often brings joy, but for one woman, hosting Friendsgiving turned into a battle over pet policy.
After a previous mishap where one of her friend’s dogs ruined the food, the host decided to implement a no-pets rule for this year’s gathering.
Kara, who takes her dogs everywhere, didn’t take kindly to the request. She argued her dogs were better behaved than most people and refused to attend unless they were welcome.
The host stood her ground, but now she’s facing backlash from her friends.
It’s not trivial when someone asks their friend not to bring dogs to their gathering. Hosts set the tone for their homes, and asking for no pets can be a valid rule, not a slight.
Pets are wonderful companions, but adding them to a social event introduces extra risks and complications.
According to one reliable pet‑hosting guide, even well‑behaved dogs can become stressed, unfamiliar noises or lots of people may frighten them.
Bringing a pet into that environment without proper arrangement can result in anxiety, accidents, or escape attempts.
Moreover, not all guests may be comfortable, or even medically safe, around dogs. Pet hair, dander, and allergens can trigger allergic reactions or respiratory problems for some people.
A study examining pet‑owner and human pairs found that owners and pets often share skin microbiota, and that urban environments increase risks of allergies for both.
If someone at the event has a hidden allergy or sensitive immune system, the presence of dogs could turn a friendly gathering into a health hazard without warning.
It’s also about fairness. Hosting a social event, especially one involving food, kids, maybe unfamiliar guests, brings a responsibility to create a safe, comfortable atmosphere.
The guidance for hosting pet‑friendly versus mixed human gatherings recommends that the host consider logistics: space, hygiene, safety, and guest preferences.
In the scenario described, the OP had previous experience: last year one of the dogs snatched food from the table in another friend’s home.
That shows the unpredictability of having pets around during meals or games, it’s a practical reason for concern, especially with children around.
Given these facts, potential allergies, safety and comfort for all guests, hygiene, and prior negative incident, the OP acted responsibly by stating a “no pets” rule for her Friendsgiving.
That rule was general, not aimed solely at her friend. She offered to accommodate her friend’s food contribution and hoped for understanding; she didn’t single out or shame the friend.
A counter‑argument: some might say it’s holiday spirit, pets are part of the family, and a party should be welcoming. That’s fair emotionally.
But in shared social settings, “everyone’s comfort” sometimes outweighs “everyone’s desire.” When bringing a pet involves risk to food, dirt, allergies or kids’ safety, the host’s preference deserves priority.
Advice for similar situations: When hosting, clarify ground rules early and neutrally. If you prefer no pets, say so plainly, without blame.
If a friend depends heavily on their pets, offer alternatives, meet up another time with just the pet owner, or suggest pet‑sitters.
If hosting involves food or children, most people will understand once you explain practical reasons (allergies, hygiene, safety).
In short, hosting isn’t just about being nice, it’s about creating a space where all guests feel comfortable and safe. Asking a friend not to bring dogs doesn’t make you controlling, it makes you a thoughtful host.
Here’s how people reacted to the post:
These Redditors agreed that while it was reasonable to ask the guest not to bring dogs, the expectation that she should still provide food was unreasonable.
This group acknowledged that the issue with the dogs was valid but criticized the timing of the communication.
These Redditors acknowledged that the no-dogs rule was fair but agreed that expecting food from the guest was a step too far.
This group focused on the poor communication and last-minute nature of the request.
These Redditors gave both OP and the guest some blame.
It’s tough when your house rules clash with someone else’s expectations, especially when emotions (and pets) are involved. Was the OP in the wrong for setting a firm boundary, or did they overstep by not making an exception for the dogs?
After all, it’s their house and their event, but could they have handled the situation differently? What do you think, was the OP justified, or did they take it too far? Share your thoughts below!
