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Husband Says He Deserves a Break After 60-Hour Workweeks – Wife Says Parenting Never Stops

by Jeffrey Stone
October 5, 2025
in Social Issues

A 35-year-old dad, fresh off a brutal 60-hour work week, finally had one day set aside just for himself. No kids, no chores, no errands. His wife, a stay-at-home mom, had agreed weeks earlier that this Sunday would be his “no-duty day.” He planned to rest, recharge, maybe paint a bit, and enjoy some quiet time.

But when the weekend rolled around, that plan went up in smoke. His wife suddenly had errands to run, chores that “couldn’t wait,” and needed him to watch the kids.

She claimed she forgot about his day off. What started as a small request turned into a full day of parenting duties, baths, puzzles, and snack prep. Feeling frustrated and ignored, he told her, “Today was supposed to be my break,” then grabbed his keys and left for the park.

He spent four peaceful hours alone before heading back home. When he walked through the door, his wife was furious. She called him selfish and said he abandoned her and the kids.

He argued that he wasn’t “babysitting” his own children and that he deserved one day of rest, just like she takes time for herself. Now, he’s wondering if he was wrong to leave.

Husband Says He Deserves a Break After 60-Hour Workweeks - Wife Says Parenting Never Stops
Not the actual photo

Buckle up for the break-time brawl – here’s the household hullabaloo, unvarnished.

AITA for telling my wife it's her job to babysit the kids and leaving the house?

I (35m) have been married to my wife (32f) for 7 years. We have two children together (6m) and (3f).

She takes care of house and babysits the kids most of the time because she's a SAHM but we evenly split chores and childcare on weekends and when I get...

My wife is much more social than I am. We moved to her home state from mine because she was wanted to be closer to her parents and her childhood...

She goes on 3-4 girls trips a year. I have no issues with that and I'm happy to babysit the kids full time in her absence.

I'm more of a homebody anyway so I usually like to just paint in the spare room or play video games every once in a while instead of traveling out...

I don't really take time off from work unless we do something as a family For the past 3-4 months, I was very busy on a major project at work.

I've been working 60 hour weeks and frankly I'm exhausted with the stress. So when the project was finally coming to an end, I told my wife I'm taking a...

Of course, I'd still clean up after myself but I didn't want to do any chores or childcare on that one day. I told her that 2 weeks in advance...

However, when that day came, my wife "forgot" about our agreement. I was in the painting room and my wife interrupted me telling me she needed me to give our...

because she spilt milk all over herself and couldn't do it because she had to wash the dishes. It was annoying but whatever, s__t happens.

Later on when I was playing video games, my wife tells me our son needs help for his math homework. I ask her why can't she help him herself, she...

This work was actually her best friend coming over and chatting for an hour.

This really pissed me off so after I helped my son and the best friend left, I told my wife I'm leaving the house for 4-5 hours.

She asked me where I was going, I told her I'm just going to chill in the park and do whatever. But then she said needs me to help out...

I told her that today was my day off from all work including house work and it's her job to babysit the kids on this day before I left the...

When I came back she was acting cold and called me an a__hole for just abandoning her and the kids.

I think she's being dramatic but when I spoke to my sister, she said parenting is a 24/7 job. So AITA?

When a Break Becomes a Battle

Parenting together is supposed to be teamwork, but sometimes that balance gets lost. One partner feels overworked at home, the other feels drained from their job, and both end up too tired to see each other’s side.

In this case, the husband felt like his wife didn’t respect the one day he asked for. The wife felt abandoned when he left.

It’s a familiar clash for many families when one person’s need for rest clashes with the other’s need for help. The real issue isn’t about who works harder. It’s about keeping promises and respecting each other’s limits.

The Real Weight of “Babysitting”

When the husband said he was tired of “babysitting,” that word struck a nerve. Calling it babysitting suggests the kids are her job and not his, which likely made her feel unappreciated.

But from his side, it wasn’t about avoiding parenting, it was about needing one day where he didn’t have to be “on.”

The problem wasn’t that he wanted a break. The problem was that communication broke down. She forgot the plan, he felt dismissed, and instead of talking it out, he stormed off.

Why Parents Burn Out

This story touches on a growing issue in modern families.

A 2023 American Psychological Association study found that over 60% of working parents experience burnout, and men who work long hours are 20% more likely to skip self-care if they don’t have spousal support.

Both parents can end up exhausted, even if their daily routines look different.

Stay-at-home parents deal with constant emotional labor and zero alone time.

Working parents often feel guilty for being away and drained from long hours. Without clear agreements on rest and responsibilities, resentment builds fast.

Expert Advice on Sharing the Load

Parenting expert Dr. Laura Markham, author of Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids, says balance doesn’t come from splitting hours evenly. It comes from empathy and communication.

“Equity in exhaustion isn’t about equal hours, it’s about understanding each other’s needs and making sure both partners have time to recover,” she writes.

In this couple’s case, that means both need to acknowledge each other’s effort. She deserves appreciation for managing the household and kids. He deserves rest after intense work weeks.

Setting boundaries clearly and following through can help stop these conflicts before they explode.

What They Could Have Done Differently

If the wife really forgot, a sincere apology and a plan to make it right could have solved a lot. If the husband felt overwhelmed, he could have expressed that without leaving.

Instead of walking out, he might have said, “I need a few hours alone right now, but we can talk later.” Small communication shifts can make big differences in these moments.

They could also schedule regular “off-duty” times for both of them. He gets one Sunday a month, she gets one day too.

Put it on a shared calendar so nobody forgets. Having clear rules about personal time helps both parents feel valued instead of trapped.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

Some readers think the husband was right. They argue that everyone deserves time to recharge, and his wife broke their agreement.

solo_throwaway254247 − I feel people are stuck on OP using the word "babysit" wrongly.

If he'd just used it for himself, that would have been an issue. But he used it for himself and his wife. So I just think of it as a...

Having said that, and based on the fact that OP's either working or at home with his family (equally contributing to childcare and chores).

And the fact that he let his wife know about his need for a break after a strenuous project and she didn't respect that, despite knowing for weeks, I'm going...

NTA Question: How did you two decide on wife being a stay-at-home parent?

Question 2: How did you guys decide on the move to wife's state?

Edit: I know there are plenty of partners who look down on and take advantage of their stay-at-home partners but it doesn't seem like that's the case here.

We can't just blindly support sahp just by virtue of them being stay-at-home-parents. Reading between the lines, I actually think that OP (and not his wife) routinely gets the short...

Edit 2: Downvote away. Edit 3: OP is either working or with his family. So he's the partner in the relationship who never gets time off.

Wife gets to go on her trips with the girls. She gets time off. OP never does. Edited.

Edit 4: Thank you! Thank you! Thank you so much for the upvotes and the awards.

15jtaylor443 − I'm going to be down voted to hell, but you all need to hear this. No one can be a parent 24/7. It's just not possible. You do...

You're only human. You WILL break before your children do, trust me. This community has unrealistic expectations for parents. He just wanted a day to himself. That's all. He's not...

He's not lazy. He's not a deadbeat dad. He's just tired. Now, my judgment depends on if you give your wife a day to unwind herself.

She also needs days off from being a parent from time to time. If you don't let her, then you're the ah. But if you do have a system, then...

Krodsonofkrod − NTA, when a parent leave the house for a weekend the other cannot pass off any responsibility. So if the other takes a single day off they should...

Others say leaving for four hours without warning was too much and that communication should come before escape.

Holiday-Kangaroo4152 − I'm not really sure why people are getting mad about the word "babysitting".

My wife and I both use that word all the time. It's very common where we're from. Didn't know it was so offensive

AussieAK − This sub loves to s__t on husbands who work themselves to the ground and still are expected to do equal share of chores at home when their wives...

NTA. This is absolutely unfair to you. Enough of this BS honestly.

If he works 60 h/w he needs some f__king rest so he can go back to the grind and least she can do is NOT expect him to do 50-50...

Even worse he is happy to do it but needed one day once in a blue moon. ONE F__KING DAY. F__K ME DEAD where is the equality?

Ordinary-Active7551 − Nta, she takes "girls trips", you get to take a day off. Next time book a vacation.

Many parents share that they’ve faced the same struggle—trying to divide time fairly but feeling like their needs get forgotten.

Sufficient-Paint-534 − NTA. People are so fixated on the word babysit. If you do look after your kids and split chores after work like you said you do,

I don't see why you are the AH for wanting a day off after working 60 hours a week.

Your wife gets to go on trips 3 to 4 times a year then why can't you have one day of doing nothing? Cannot believe people are calling you AH...

Kitchen-Lychee6221 − NTA wife gets to travel for whole weekends, dude can't have a day?

LavishnessQuiet956 − NTA. OP meant childcare, not babysitting; I feel like people are way too stuck on that word usage (English is not first language) and missing the content.

Both parents deserve time off from parenting. Wife gets it and so husband deserves it as well. OP expressed the need and wife agreed to it.

That was not honored at home, so OP left to get time alone. I think that is reasonable.

lifeiswonderful-1990 − NTA - she gets her downtime by travelling with her friends, this is your way of getting downtime and you just happened to do it at home.

She needs to respect this. The YTA crowd will just jump on your use of word babysitting

Taking the Lesson Home

One forgotten promise can turn into a fight that feels much bigger than it is.

The dad’s quiet day at the park might seem selfish on the surface, but it came from a place of burnout. The mom’s anger came from feeling abandoned. Both are valid. What matters most is what they do next.

The takeaway? Rest is not a luxury; it’s a necessity. When both partners make space for each other’s recovery, they protect not only themselves but their whole family.

So, was he wrong to take his break anyway, or was it the only way to make his point? Would you have done the same, or stayed to talk it out? Whatever your answer, one thing’s clear, every parent deserves a moment to breathe.

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone is a valuable freelance writer at DAILY HIGHLIGHT. As a senior entertainment and news writer, Jeffrey brings a wealth of expertise in the field, specifically focusing on the entertainment industry.

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