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Parent Blocks Daughter’s Trip to India, Citing Safety Risks – Accused of Being Overprotective and Racist!

by Sunny Nguyen
October 14, 2025
in Social Issues

It started as an ordinary family dinner. Laughter, stories, and the smell of home cooking filled the air until one conversation turned the table cold.

A 19-year-old daughter shared her excitement about spending winter break in India with a close friend. Her parent, who pays for her rent and tuition while she studies electrical engineering, instantly said no.

What began as a travel dream quickly became a shouting match about safety, control, and trust. She accused her parent of being overprotective and even racist. The parent stood firm, saying the trip was simply too dangerous. Soon, the whole family was divided.

Parent Blocks Daughter’s Trip to India, Citing Safety Risks - Accused of Being Overprotective and Racist!
Not the actual photo

A Ban on Daughter’s India Trip Sparked a Family Firestorm!

AITAH for not allowing my daughter to travel to India?

My daughter is 19 and studying electrical engineering. She is doing well and I am proud of her.

For context I pay her tuition and rent so she can focus on school without needing to work part time.

She recently told me she wants to go to India over winter break with her close friend who has family there.

My daughter is a white Canadian and her friend is half Brazilian and half Portuguese but white passing.

I told her absolutely not. I do not think it is safe for young women especially white tourists in India.

I have seen plenty of videos online where foreign women are swarmed by men, harassed.

I do not think that is an environment I can in good conscience support her putting herself into.

And I'm not quite sure I believe her that her friend has relatives that actually live there and she might be misrepresenting that.

She argued that they are going to Goa which is in the south and supposedly safer but I am not convinced.

Just because one region is safer does not mean it is safe.

To me there are way too many risks and if something happened I would never forgive myself for letting her go.

She is very upset saying I am being controlling and overprotective and even r**cist.

I feel like since I am supporting her financially I should have a say in these decisions.

It is not like she can just pay for the trip herself right now.

The Clash Between Independence and Protection

The parent had supported their daughter through college so she could focus fully on her studies. They were proud of her ambition and progress.

But when she mentioned going to Goa, India – a tourist hotspot known for beaches and nightlife, the parent’s alarm bells rang.

They had seen too many reports online about harassment toward foreign women, and the idea of their daughter traveling without supervision terrified them.

The daughter’s friend, who was half Brazilian and half Portuguese, said her family had ties in India. But the parent wasn’t convinced that made the trip safer.

They refused to pay for it, which led to an emotional outburst. The daughter said she felt treated like a child. The parent argued it wasn’t about control, it was about safety and responsibility.

The argument escalated. She accused them of being racist for assuming India was unsafe, while they felt unfairly labeled for caring about her wellbeing.

Both sides dug in. What should have been a talk about travel became a painful lesson in communication and boundaries.

Expert Opinion: Finding Balance Between Safety and Freedom

Raising young adults is never easy. Parents want to keep their children safe, but at some point, they must learn to let go.

The Redditor’s fears weren’t unfounded, Goa does have issues with harassment and tourist scams, especially during peak season.

Several Indian women online agreed that solo or small-group travel can be risky in certain areas, even for locals.

Still, completely banning the trip might have been too strict. Experts say this kind of situation calls for calm discussion, not ultimatums.

According to a 2023 Pew Research study, 61% of parents find it difficult to balance safety and independence once their kids become adults.

The best approach is often a middle grounD, reviewing safety plans together, discussing trusted contacts, or choosing safer, group-based tours.

Family therapist Dr. Susan Forward explains, “Empowering young adults means guiding, not dictating, their choices.”

That guidance could include researching travel advisories, learning about local customs, and budgeting responsibly.

The daughter, in turn, could show maturity by presenting a detailed plan, accommodation, emergency contacts, and verified transport options.

This approach builds trust instead of tension. It’s not about who’s right, but how both sides can understand each other.

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

Many parents said they would have done the same, refusing to fund a trip they viewed as unsafe.

Alarming_Ad_4308 − I wouldn't go. You can't undo some experiences. As my mum would say, "it only has to happen once"

Healthy-Magician-502 − NTA. If she can’t afford the trip on her own, she can’t go. You’re under no obligation to fund a dangerous trip.

ForgerFamilyFan − I am an Indian woman. I would urge foreign tourists to travel to India only and only if you research well and are a cautious person.

If you are someone who easily lets their guard down, no. Technically, every place in the world is now unsafe for a woman.

In India, there are some places that are usually safe like the north-east of India.

However, for me, that a woman lives is more important than giving fake accolades to my country.

We have a deep-rooted issue of disrespect towards women. Many, not all,

but many men were never taught basic decency when dealing with women.

Indian women who are aware of this are still not completely safe in our country so I wouldn't suggest unaware tourists to travel here.

That said, we do have a lot of people from the west who travel here.

I am assuming they have researched places well and they also have a great time.

I am not sure how much your daughter knows about India but at 19 I would not recommend her to come here.

Some pointed out that if the daughter really wanted to go, she could save up and pay for it herself, independence works both ways.

chalnaa − I’m an Indian woman who visits Goa often. Goa during the winters would be the worst time to visit as a Caucasian woman

until and unless she is going to deep South Goa or the Northern most part of Goa.

That is peak tourist season and a lot of Indian men think it is a free pass to harass women, especially foreigners.

I would exercise immense caution and if I really want to visit then I would choose a reliable hotel.

Goa has a taxi mafia which means you will not find Uber equivalent for local commute and public transport isn’t the most reliable.

You will need to rent cabs/bikes. Irrespective of whether you are funding the trip or not, help her with the due diligence.

If you need it, I can help you with giving a perspective on the areas and stay options they wish to explore.

I may get hate for this comment but I’m calling a spade a spade.

singlerider − I can't speak to the safety of Goa, but my gf grew up in Delhi, where these days if you're a lone woman driving late at night and...

you officially don't have to stop because there have been so many incidents of women being raped *by the police*

callmepriyanshi − Hey I’m an Indian woman and ngl even my parents didn’t let me go to Goa when I was 19.

I finally went last year(funded my own trip lol), when I was more mature and could actually understand what’s safe and what’s not. I kinda get his hesitation.

India is amazing, but it’s not the easiest place for someone that young and inexperienced to navigate especially without her own family that too at the age 19.

Some readers offered practical advice: watch travel vlogs together, research trusted group tours, or plan the trip with more supervision.

Haunted-Head − OP, please show this to your daughter if need be. No, your daughter is too young to be coming here.

Goa is generally better and foreigner-friendly but we're currently entering the time when the state will be filled with Indian men from far more regressive states.

Even if she's okay with the possibility of being leered/pawed at or molested/harassed, foreigners are also targeted and harassed in terms of money.

It is a BIG culture shock at the very least, even if her friend is traveling with her.

Winter-Yoghurt-9870 − I noticed some comments saying OP's controlling or an AH.

I can't wrap my head around this.

1. OP's daughter expects OP to fund her trip to India.

2. It's OP's money, so they can spend it however they want (not sure if that's mom or dad writing).

3. OP is NTA for not wanting to spend their money on the trip.

4. The daughter is very entitled to make such demands. 5. The daughter is free to find some part time job and earn her own money if she wants to...

And yes it's possible to work part time and have very good grades

--ophidia-- − I just recently came back from India had to go there due to work. I am "kinda white" petite and young looking.

Honestly I plan on never coming back not even if my work says it is mandatory.

I was in danger at least 6 times. I highly suggest not to let your daughter go.

Show her videos or testimonials so she can see that it is for her safety.

Educational_Baby3590 − You chose to pay her tuition and rent, not her vacations. Maybe she should get a part time job to fund this excursion.

Lesson Learned

Every family faces a moment like this, a turning point between protection and independence. The parent acted from love, not prejudice. The daughter’s frustration came from wanting freedom, not rebellion. Both emotions were real.

The lesson here is that open communication can prevent misunderstanding. Parents should explain fears without judgment. Young adults should show readiness and responsibility before demanding freedom.

Money also matters, if parents are paying, they have a right to set boundaries. But once children start funding their own choices, the balance of power changes.

If this family can rebuild trust, they may still find a way for the daughter to explore the world safely, maybe even together.

Who Grounded the Goa Getaway?

The parent’s decision came from genuine concern, but it may have silenced an important moment for growth. The daughter’s anger revealed a deeper need for independence and respect.

Could they find common ground with better communication? Probably. A compromise, like a guided group tour, or saving for the trip herself, might have turned a fight into a life lesson.

In the end, both sides wanted the same thing: safety, freedom, and trust. But getting there takes patience, empathy, and time.

So, how would you handle it if your child wanted to travel somewhere you didn’t trust? Would you let them go, set conditions, or put your foot down?

Sunny Nguyen

Sunny Nguyen

Sunny Nguyen writes for DailyHighlight.com, focusing on social issues and the stories that matter most to everyday people. She’s passionate about uncovering voices and experiences that often go unheard, blending empathy with insight in every article. Outside of work, Sunny can be found wandering galleries, sipping coffee while people-watching, or snapping photos of everyday life - always chasing moments that reveal the world in a new light.

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