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Teen And Her Twin Sister Demand Separate Rooms, Parents Claim It’s Unnecessary

by Katy Nguyen
November 8, 2025
in Social Issues

Sometimes the hardest part about family life is the space, literal space. For one 14-year-old girl, sharing a room with her twin sister in a four-bedroom house has reached its breaking point.

Despite having plenty of space in the house, their parents refuse to let the twins each have their own room, arguing that they should learn to make do.

But with growing frustrations over clutter, lack of privacy, and constant fighting, the desire for separate rooms has turned into a full-blown conflict.

Are they being spoiled and ungrateful, or is it fair to ask for their own space when it’s already there?

Teen And Her Twin Sister Demand Separate Rooms, Parents Claim It’s Unnecessary
Not the actual photo

'AITA for fighting with my parents about having my own bedroom?'

Me (14F), my twin sister "Kate", and our parents (40s) live in a four-bedroom house.

My parents have the master, the 2nd room is a guest room, Dad uses the 3rd room as an office, and my sister and I share the other room.

The three regular bedrooms are small. Dad works from home two days a week, and we have guests maybe 10 days a year.

I'm very outgoing, I like having people over, and Kate's an introvert who wants to watch her old TV shows and talk to her friends on Discord.

She likes order, and I like putting my clothes on the chair without being yelled at.

We've been asking to have our own rooms since we were 9, and my parents are refusing to move us because "we don't have enough space for everybody's needs".

Quarantine was awful, Kate and I fought all the time, and our parents yelled at her when she moved her stuff to the guest room because Mom has her craft...

I love my sister, but this is making me like her less, and sometimes I think she barely tolerates me because we're always in each other's space.

We barely fit in here anymore. The closet is too small for our clothes, Kate's books are in stacks on the floor, I can't listen to music in peace, and...

Yesterday, I was looking for my hair curler and caused a book avalanche that knocked the USS Enterprise-whatever off the desk.

Kate was screaming, I was screaming, and she asked for the thousandth time to combine the guestroom & office so she can take the other room.

Dad said he absolutely needs an office, I said I absolutely need a closet, and it doesn't make sense to have all this space and put both his kids in...

Mom said we're not entitled to a bedroom each and there are millions of children who share a room, and if we wanted more space, we should get rid of...

Like, we're sorry for being two separate people with two people's worth of belongings that you bought for us.

I asked who is entitled to a room that's empty 346 days per year or an office that's used twice a week, and why I'm the unreasonable one for wanting...

After that, we were yelling in circles, and Kate took her laptop and locked herself in the guest room.

Dad asked what she thinks she's doing, and she said, "googling nursing homes with bunk beds", which helped not at all.

So, are we the assholes? Today, my aunt and grandma visited and called us ungrateful for everything we have and were disappointed in us.

I don't believe I'm an ass because I'm just asking to use the space we already have, but at the end of the day, it's my parents' house, not mine.

Kate and I wouldn't be angry if we lived in a two-bedroom house, but four bedrooms?

One room just sitting there, being a waste of sq ft and taxes? And we have to share?

Sorry for any mistakes, I'm not a native speaker, but I spend too much time online. I showed Kate, and she said "paragraphs".

In this scenario, the twins’ frustration over sharing a small room is not just about space, it’s tied to the developmental need for privacy, identity and autonomy.

Adolescents are in a phase where they’re not just growing physically but are also defining who they are, and a personal space can support that.

According to the parenting‑resource site Raising Children Network, as children move into their teens they “need more privacy and personal space. This is because your child is exploring new ideas, emotions and social interests.”

In “ My Bedroom is Me: Young People, Private Space and the Emergence of Adult Identity,” researcher S. Lincoln writes that teenagers use their bedrooms as “sites of self‑exploration” and “emerging adult lives” where they can reflect, revise and express their identity.

If we apply that to the twins: one sister is outgoing and social, the other introverted and in need of quiet; both are asking for distinct spaces so they can flourish in their own right. Sharing a room in this setting doesn’t just challenge logistics, it clashes with those developmental imperatives.

From the parents’ side, it’s understandable to point out that many children share rooms and that living arrangements must balance everyone’s needs.

But when there is actual unused space in the home, the refusal to reconsider layout raises questions about how the family is negotiating resource allocation and respect for each child’s growing identity.

The idea of “personal space” extends well beyond letting a teen blast music quietly; it frames a kid’s sense of belonging, control and emotional safety at home. If a shared bedroom becomes a constant source of stress, it may impair sibling relationships and self‑development.

The parents might sit down with each daughter and clearly map out what each one needs in a space (quiet, storage, social time) and why it matters. This helps avoid the debate becoming just “I want a separate room” vs “We don’t have enough.”

They could explore shifting their layout: for example, repurposing the guest room or reorganizing the office into a smaller space so one daughter gains a room. Given that the guest room and office are rarely used, this may be feasible.

Introduce a “shared room plan”: if they cannot allocate separate rooms right now, establish routines or physical modifications (room dividers, shelving, distinct zones) so each twin feels they own part of the space.

Commit to reviewing the arrangement periodically. Teen needs evolve fast, so a 6‑ or 12‑month check‑in could help the family adapt rather than get stuck in resentment.

Check out how the community responded:

These commenters emphasize that the parents are being selfish by denying their children the space they need for their personal development.

monsteramoons − I'm gonna go with NTA. Your parents are putting the POSSIBILITY of needing a whole room for a guest once or twice a year over the very real...

Also, your sister saying she's googling nursing homes with bunk beds is hilarious.

diminishingpatience − NTA. She said, "googling nursing homes with bunk beds." Thank you for making me laugh as well.

wildferalfun − NTA. But I laughed to tears about nursing homes with bunk beds.

If my kid said that to me, I'd have a really hard time taking myself so seriously that I wouldn't fall over laughing.

I do think a dedicated guestroom and a dedicated office are a ridiculous waste when the family harmony would be drastically improved by separating children.

My office is moving to the dining room because I can no longer use my daughter's closet as an office. She needs privacy and personal space.

Aggravating_Art_4809 − NTA, you’re both at an age where you need your own space.

Your sister is on fire there “googling nursing homes with bunk beds” oh my god 😂😂😂

This group emphasizes the emotional toll that sharing a room at an older age can have and proposes practical solutions to create space for both siblings.

Ok-Abbreviations4510 − NTA. It’s weird to me that the house has so much space, but they’d rather prioritize possible occasional guests over giving their children their own rooms.

Ayaruq − NTA a thousand times. As a twin myself, also forced to cohabitate with my sister in a tiny room as a teenager, this brings back soooo many bad...

The damage that was done to our relationship lasted DECADES, and there wasn't even an extra room we could've used.

We were just too close at the exact same life stage while being too different.

Googling nursing homes with bunk beds. Epic. Remember that you two are in this together.

It might be super obnoxious having to live on top of each other (literally), but this is your parents' fault, not hers.

You will have each other long after you've sent them to the home with bunk beds.

They're not entitled to their own room, after all; they've already established that.

No one will ever understand you more, or call you on your BS faster, than your twin. Fight to keep that relationship.

Don't let it cause a rift between you like we did; we wasted years not being there for each other when we really needed it, and we both regret it...

Squinky75 − What if one of you takes the guest room but promises that when a guest comes over, you will go bunk with the other one?

AlterEgoDejaVu − Your parents don't see this as their problem, so if I were you, I'd make it their problem.

Work together on a schedule/strategy to spread your personal activities and stuff on the kitchen/dining room table, living room, family room, wherever, and as obnoxiously loud/crowded/in the way as possible.

When asked, just say you're trying really hard to give each other some personal space, and that you are simply utilizing rooms shared by the whole family.

illuminalice − NTA. You have the space, sounds like your parents only wanted one child, and getting twins was an inconvenience to their room plans, so they just did it...

While you have guests, you can share the room for a few days a year, and then both have your own room again.

[Reddit User] − NTA. Your parents, on the other hand, are prioritizing their own wants and needs over you and your twin.

Your home does have the space, but your parents are choosing to satisfy themselves before their kids' needs.

IMO, you and your sister have reached a point where you each need your own spaces.

Your parents could probably figure out a way to turn one room into an office AND a guest room, especially since they don’t get used more than twice a week.

They are choosing not to because it interferes with what they want. Sorry for the b__ deal! Save up and move out as soon as you're old enough.

You won’t have to live like this forever, just until you can pay your own rent.

These users stress that the parents’ refusal to give their children privacy is unfair, especially given the available space.

Crazy-Button-8451 − I don't understand your parents.

Guest bedrooms are a privilege for people who have more space than occupants who need said space.

I have a guest room in my house because there is no one in need of it at my house.

It is also a storage room for things I use enough that it would be a pain to put them in the attic, but inconvenient to have in common areas.

It sounds like you and your sister have a cause to be a united front on if you don't k__l eachother first.

Ask them if there are any reasons beyond 'not having enough space for everyone's stuff' for why they don't want to give you two separate rooms.

Because stuff can be rearranged. If they won't let you both have separate rooms, maybe they will let you both store some of your stuff in the guest room?

Maybe your mom can keep her craft stuff in the office so that her belongings don't get mixed up with yours.

But most importantly, stop yelling and locking yourselves in the guest bedroom. Your parents have shown that it will not help your cause.

valor88 − NTA. I mean, what's wrong with just bunking together only when guests are there?

TheDreadPirateJeff − NTA, you're both becoming older teens, it's stupid for you to be sharing a room at your ages, especially if you have an entire extra bedroom that's only...

You're both growing into adults and need private space to be yourselves and relax.

Your parents should do what many other parents do, and give you that extra room, and then either use the office, or make one of you girls sleep on the...

This group highlights how unfair it is for the parents to force their kids to share a room when they clearly need separate spaces.

Caspian4136 − NTA. Neither of you is the AH for wanting your own rooms.

At this age, I really feel you NEED your own space and can't understand why your parents are being so unreasonable and stubborn about it.

Twins don't mean locked at the hip, you're individuals, but your parent seem to think otherwise. Btw, I'm a parent with two kids.

I would never, ever make them share a room if we had space, which we do, so they have their own rooms.

I also grew up with twin brothers who had to share a room until one opened up, and omg they were SO happy to be able to have their own...

Your parents are being selfish. There is zero reason for the office and guest room not to be combined into one.

Any guest who sleeps there won't even blink if they have to sleep in a guest room/office.

I'm not sure why they can't just give you what you girls absolutely need. PRIVACY!

Btw, Kate's comment about looking up nursing homes with bunk beds made me literally lol. Good one, Kate!

Top-Put2038 − NTA. "Googling nursing homes with bunk beds," oh god. I genuinely laughed out loud.

Absolute burn. Put the craft stuff in the office. Be prepared for one of you to take turns on a camp bed or air mattress when you have guests.

SHOW YOUR PARENTS THIS POST AND ITS REPLIES. Hopefully problem is solved.

Dear parental units, please remember your children will get to choose your nursing home. With bunk beds.

At the heart of this argument is a common issue many families face, the struggle for space. Is it fair to demand a separate room in a house that’s already stretched for space, or are the kids overreacting?

Do you think the parents should accommodate their request, or is it just part of growing up? Share your thoughts below, what’s the best way to handle this family feud?

Katy Nguyen

Katy Nguyen

Hey there! I’m Katy Nguyễn, a writer at Dailyhighlight.com. I’m a woman in my 30s with a passion for storytelling and a degree in Journalism. My goal is to craft engaging, heartfelt articles that resonate with our readers, whether I’m diving into the latest lifestyle trends, exploring travel adventures, or sharing tips on personal growth. I’ve written about everything from cozy coffee shop vibes to navigating career changes with confidence. When I’m not typing away, you’ll likely find me sipping a matcha latte, strolling through local markets, or curled up with a good book under fairy lights. I love sunrises, yoga, and chasing moments of inspiration.

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