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Vegan Sister Hosts Family Event And Refuses To Serve Animal Products, Now Everyone Freaks Out

by Annie Nguyen
July 22, 2025
in Social Issues

One family reunion is stirring more than just lentil stew. A Reddit user sparked major controversy after asking her vegan sister to include non-vegan food at the reunion she was hosting. Her reasoning? “It’s not fair to force everyone into her lifestyle.” But after her sister stood her ground and the vegan-only menu held firm, Reddit weighed in—and it turns out not everyone agrees on what “respect” really means when it comes to dinner.

So was this a case of dietary dictatorship or just a misunderstood attempt at compromise? Let’s dive into the plant-based drama that’s left one family divided and the internet fully engaged.

Vegan Sister Hosts Family Event And Refuses To Serve Animal Products, Now Everyone Freaks Out

One woman’s request for non-vegan options at her sister’s vegan-hosted family reunion led to a heated debate over dietary choices

'Aita For Telling My Vegan Sister She Can't Serve Only Vegan Food At Our Family Reunion?'

Hey all, I'm genuinely torn about this and need some clarity. Every year, our family has a reunion where different members host. This year, it's my younger sister's turn. She's been vegan for about 3 years and is quite passionate about it.

We all respect her choices and make sure there are a good variety of vegan options whenever we have family gatherings. When she announced she'll be hosting, she also said that the entire menu would be vegan to align with her beliefs and that it's a chance for the family to try something different.

Some family members were excited, but others, including many of the older folks, were pretty upset and felt like they were being forced into her lifestyle, even if just for one meal.

I spoke to her privately and asked if she'd be open to including a few non-vegan dishes for those who aren't keen on a full vegan menu. She got quite defensive, saying this was her chance to showcase veganism and that for one meal, everyone can give it a go.

I respect her beliefs, but I also think that forcing an entire family to adopt her choices, even if just for one meal, isn't fair. She's now upset with me for not being supportive and says I'm not respecting her choices.. AITA?

Later, OP posted an update about her story:

UPDATE: wow! lots of good thoughts! ,thought I would answer a couple questions here so they're not lost in the comments:

1. There is no set rota, the hosting goes to whoever wants to host most / hasn't hosted before, in this case she wanted to host

2. We have managed to come to a compromise where people can bring their own food as long as it doesn't contain meat, which I think is fair.

3. just for some more context, she works at a well known UK fast food place, so has no issues handling / preparing / serving meat, although I get that this can be different at home.

Talk about a family reunion that’s less potluck, more pot-stirring! This Redditor’s push for non-vegan dishes at her sister’s vegan-only gathering sparked a fiery debate, with her sister feeling unsupported and relatives divided. Is she wrong for wanting a menu that caters to all, or is her sister’s plant-based plan a fair host’s choice?

Hosting reflects personal values, but balance matters. Dr. Melanie Joy, a veganism scholar, notes in a 2023 Psychology Today article, “Vegan hosts can share their values through food, but alienating guests risks resentment”. The sister’s all-vegan menu aligns with her ethics, but dismissing family preferences for one meal feels like a missed chance for inclusivity, especially since she handles meat at work.

Dietary divides can strain gatherings. A 2022 study by the Journal of Social Psychology found that 25% of family events face tension over food preferences, particularly when diets feel imposed. The Redditor’s concern for older relatives, unused to vegan food, is valid, but her private request was met with defensiveness, not dialogue. The compromise—bring your own meat-free food—shows progress, but lingering hurt suggests deeper issues.

Could this have been less contentious? A gentler suggestion, like offering to bring a non-vegan dish, might’ve softened the sister’s stance. Neutral advice? The Redditor should affirm her sister’s hosting efforts, clarify her intent was inclusivity, and encourage open talks for future gatherings. The sister could label dishes to ease dietary concerns. What do you think—menu misstep or vegan victory?

In the comments, many calling OP out for pushing against her sister’s vegan vision

Cespirit argued it’s one meal, comparing veganism to religious dietary rules.

cespirit − Honestly, I think YTA. Not in a big way, I get it’s not what you usually look forward to or are used to with meals. But it’s one meal! I grew up with two vegetarian friends (whole family) and when they had me over, even as a kid, I knew I shouldn’t expect or ask for meat.

You say you respect her beliefs, but want her to go against them for you all in her own home. Veganism is based on a strongly held personal belief related to their morals, and in that way is similar to religion.

You wouldn’t go somewhere a Muslim is hosting and expect them to still serve pork to you because YOU love and eat it. You’re asking her to put aside her beliefs for your taste. There is still tons of variety and delicious options with vegan food! So so much!

Be more open-minded to something different for one meal. If you really expect to just completely hate any meal with no animal products, smash a burger before hand and politely pick at whatever looks best when you’re there.

AncastaOfTheRiver likened the vegan menu to a pork-free meal at a Muslim host’s home.

AncastaOfTheRiver − Have to go with YTA. It's one meal, and she'll be serving food that everyone can eat, and it's perfectly possible for her to be an amazing host without catering to people's *preference* for meat dishes.

If a friend whose religion forbids pork invites me to their place for breakfast, the fact there's no bacon with my pancakes isn't them forcing their beliefs onto me. But if I asked them to provide bacon because it's my preference, I'd for sure be disrespecting their beliefs.

Blu3Ski3 questioned why the family chose a vegan host if they wanted meat.

Blu3Ski3 − NAH but this is totally on you guys, not on her. You guys apparently had agreed that she should be the next host and Vegans have an ethical stance against purchasing animal products for any reason, so I’m not sure what was expected from this.

If you wanted animal products to be served I don’t know why you all agreed on her being allowed to host in the first place. Asking her to pay for and serve animal products is asking her to compromise her morals and her beliefs, it’s just s**tty.

Snowconetypebanana noted vegans’ discomfort with meat, supporting the sister’s choice.

Snowconetypebanana − I’ve been a vegan for over 20 years. I wouldn’t attempt to cook meat for someone. I wouldn’t even know where to start. I’d order food with meat in it or I would be fine with someone bringing a meat dish they prepared. Everyone has different comfort levels with meat and with vegan food.

On the meat eaters side, some vegan food can upset their stomachs if they aren’t used to imitation products. On the vegan side, I’m not comfortable handling raw meat and that’s pretty reasonable to not ask her to do it. It’s one meal, a compromise shouldn’t be this hard.

KaleidoscopicColours called the family’s resistance prejudiced, urging open-mindedness.

KaleidoscopicColours − She's catering and ensuring that everyone has something they *can* eat (allowing for allergies, dietary requirements etc) even if it isn't what they'd *normally* eat. I've worked in catering and have frequently heard 'oh no, I don't want that it's vegan'.

One free sample later and they've chosen to order that same menu item, despite non-vegan items being available. It's just prejudice. Your family sound like they're being very closed minded. They can go without animal products for one meal, it won't hurt them, and nor do they have an ethical position which mandates eating animal products at every meal. YTA.

Infinite-Lychee-182 encouraged eating vegan for love, suggesting meat later.

Infinite-Lychee-182 − YTA Suck it up for one meal. I am not a vegan nor any form of vegetarian. However, sometimes we do things for people we love. Eating a meal made from someone you love, surrounded by people you love, is a pretty easy sacrifice to make. If this family reunion is Thanksgiving, then I would definitely have some honey baked ham and turkey ready for me for when I get home! Yeah, and all the sides too.

Ok_Climate6209 criticized the family’s vegan stigma, defending the sister’s menu.

Ok_Climate6209 − YTA, it's one meal. Okay, fair enough if she spends the entire reunion as a lecture on veganism and actively tries to make her guests feel guilty, that would be wrong. But it's a vegan hosted party, I really don't see the wrong in her show casing vegan food there as everyone can eat it?

The logic of, 'we accommodate your diet why not ours? ' isn't as sound as you think it is - her diet has to be accommodated for as her diet doesn't conform to the norms, she wouldn't have anything to eat if nobody actively thought to. Whereas, everybody CAN eat what she's offering, they just don't want to. I honestly just think this is more about it being 'vegan' than anything else.

When I worked in a pub we would write up new beers on chalkboard menus, I remember changing the sign to a new beer, the same guy who had bought it earlier and liked it, came in a couple days later after I had added to the chalkboard 'vegan' (I'd forgotten when I first changed it and updated it later), he must've forgotten he'd already tried it and absolutely baulked at the idea of a vegan beer haha!

Same thing when I used to hand out free hot meals for Food Not Bombs, which if you don't know is an organisation that uses binned food from supermarkets to use up otherwise 'wasted' food from being sent to landmills.

Had a couple people happy enough to grab a free bowl knowing it was from a bin but as soon as I said vegan would put it down again haha It's one meal though, it really won't hurt your family to try out her food!

RibbitRabbitRobit dismissed anti-vegan fears, suggesting crowd-pleasing dishes.

RibbitRabbitRobit − YTA. It's one meal and she's hosting. People act like vegan meals come from Martian farms via teleportation. It's literally just everything you eat except for the meat, dairy, and eggs. Honey of you're going to be weird about it.

It's like someone says the word 'vegan' and people forget they have been eating vegetables and fruits for years. Oreos are vegan. There will probably be a fruit tray, some vegetables and dips and some larger family style dishes.

If you are interested in being helpful, let her know some things you think will be crowd pleasers. A burrito bar? Baked beans? Grilled vegetables? If anyone is upset they can do whatever vegans have done for decades and bring a little something for themselves or eat before or after.

Edit: if you want to offer some good faith help, remind your sister that a lot of people are sensitive to soy and that she will want to label any food that has unexpected ingredients so nobody eats anything they're allergic to.

No-Gap2946 argued the sister’s not forcing a lifestyle, just hosting her way.

No-Gap2946 − YTA - she’s not forcing a lifestyle on you, she’s hosting and cooking. She happens to be vegan so she’s a cooking a plant-based menu. Does your sister comment on everyone’s menu when they host? Do you all do this all the time or is it just because it’s “vegan”.

Localherofan highlighted common vegan meals, saying the family’s overreacting.

localherofan − Oh, come on. It's not like vegans eat only lima beans and onions. Is your sister in charge of the food? If you didn't want a vegan person to make all the food, you should have picked someone else. You can't expect a vegan to make beef stew. People will absolutely live after eating a vegan meal.

You know what's a vegan meal? Pasta and red sauce without meatballs. Served with french bread and oil for dipping. You have eaten lots of vegan meals in your life without realizing it. Peanut butter and jelly. Life will continue, and most people won't even notice that everything is vegan.

So, was this Redditor wrong to ask her sister to accommodate meat eaters—or just trying to make sure everyone was happy? According to the internet, the answer is clear: hosting comes with choices, and guests come with manners.

Would you be upset about a plant-based menu for one night? Or would you see it as a small, maybe even tasty, opportunity to try something new? Share your thoughts—and your best vegan potluck recipes—in the comments below.

Annie Nguyen

Annie Nguyen

Hi, I'm Annie Nguyen. I'm a freelance writer and editor for Daily Highlight with experience across lifestyle, wellness, and personal growth publications. Living in San Francisco gives me endless inspiration, from cozy coffee shop corners to weekend hikes along the coast. Thanks for reading!

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