Woman Inherits House And $100K—Now Her Family Demands She Share It With Her Jobless Brother
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Woman Inherits House And $100K—Now Her Family Demands She Share It With Her Jobless Brother

Annie Nguyen by Annie Nguyen
July 3, 2025
in Blog
Reading Time: 12 mins read
Woman Inherits House And $100K—Now Her Family Demands She Share It With Her Jobless Brother

A Reddit user found herself the unexpected villain of the family after her beloved grandfather passed away and left her a life-changing inheritance. She received one of his homes and a six-figure sum—while her brother got a fraction of that. Cue family drama louder than a reality TV reunion.

   
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The twist? Her brother hasn’t worked a single day in his life, lives off their parents, and once stole their grandmother’s jewelry to pay for weed. Still, the family believes she should split the money with him to “give him a chance.” Her response? A firm no. So, would she be the bad guy for sticking to her gut? Find out what Reddit had to say below.

Woman Inherits House And $100K—Now Her Family Demands She Share It With Her Jobless Brother

One woman’s inheritance from her granddad turned into a family battle when her parents demanded she share it with her jobless brother

'Wibta If I Didn't Share My Inheritance With My Brother?'

Me (26f) and my brother (27m) grew up close. As kids do, we eventually grew apart into our teens. My brother wound up dropping out of HS and falling in with a bad crowd. I got a full ride to college. I don't begrudge my brother not going to college.

College isn't for everyone, and sometimes education in general is not compatible. It's fine. I loved him dearly, still do. It's just that he's 27 and hasn't ever had a job. Any job. Literally any job.

He lives in an apartment paid for by our parents in a very expensive part of the city and does nothing but smoke pot and play video games all day. He knows my mom is too afraid of him being homeless to stop supporting him, and my dad just goes along with it.

They've refinanced their house several times to support him, which meant they never supported me financially. Recently, my grandpa died. I was really close to him and the news hit me hard.

I would go over once a week at least to clean his house for him (he was 95) go grocery shopping, run errands, hang out, etc. My brother was not welcome in my grandpa's house because he had in the past stolen things.

Multiple times he stole valuables from Italy, where my grandpa was born, he stole a TV once, he stole my deceased grandma's jewelry--all to pay for weed. I was informed by the executor of my grandpa's estate that I inherited one of his houses and a decent amount of money from him. My brother inherited money as well, but far less. Think 100k vs 10k. I feel awful.

Yeah my brother can be a sh*thead but I do love him. I'm sure he has some undiagnosed mental issues.

Recently my mom came down HARD, hinting and then flat out informing me that I was to share the 'ridiculous amount of money' with my brother so that he can get on his feet and my mom could have a break supporting him. Thing is, I don't want to share.

I know it's a lot of money and a house, but I don't want to enable my brother to continue his lifestyle. I don't feel like it's my job to worry about what my parents do, because it's their choice, but I don't want to help.

My mom is mad, my brother is mad, my dad is mad--so now I wonder if I am an AH for not giving him a little bit more.. So? WIBTA? ETA: WOW, I didn't expect anything near this kind of feedback.

OP later added an update:

There are so many comments and pieces of good advice and I can't reply to them all but please know I've read and taken to heart every single word, and all of you have strengthened my resolve that I am allowed to say no.

Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, even the few people who said I was too harsh. I appreciate your insight, every single one of you. I wanted to clarify something, because a few people wondered what my parents got. It was my mom's dad and they didn't get along very well, but about ten years ago my grandpa gave them their inheritance early.

I don't know all of the exact details because I was a teenager and worried about other things lol, but I do know my parents and grandparents (my grandma was alive then) sat down with a lawyer and it was very serious and suddenly my parents had enough money to buy new cars that they needed.

I think they also threw money at my high school to make them stop complaining about my brother, but that's just a theory. So yes, they were acknowledged in the will as having asked for and accepted their inheritance early.

Talk about an inheritance that’s more drama than dollars! OP’s windfall—a house and significant cash—became a family flashpoint when her mom pushed her to share with her unemployed brother, who’s been coasting on parental support. Her refusal, rooted in his history of stealing from their granddad, has everyone fuming. Is she right to hold firm, or should she cut her brother a break?

Family enabling can trap loved ones in dependency. Mike Loverde, Clinical Director & Founder, Family First Intervention, a family dynamics expert, notes in a 2019 Family First Intervention article that enabling prevents growth by shielding adults from consequences. The OP’s parents, by funding her brother’s rent and lifestyle, have stunted his independence, leaving him jobless at 27. Her granddad’s will, favoring her for her care and barring her brother for theft, reflects deliberate intent to reward responsibility.

Inheritance disputes often strain families. A 2022 study by the National Bureau of Economic Research found that 35% of families face conflict over unequal inheritances, especially when favoritism is perceived. OP’s brother, despite his possible mental health struggles, received $10,000—hardly a snub—but her parents’ pressure to share ignores her granddad’s wishes and her own financial sacrifices.

Could she have softened the blow? A calm discussion with her parents about her brother’s need for therapy or job support might’ve eased tensions. Still, her refusal to enable his lifestyle aligns with her granddad’s intent. Neutral advice? Stick to the will, suggest family counseling to address enabling, and use the inheritance wisely for her future. If her brother needs help, point him to professional resources, not her wallet. What do you think—selfish or sensible?

OP’s inheritance investigators rallied behind OP, slamming her family’s entitlement and enabling behavior

This Redditor praised her for honoring her granddad’s wishes, noting her brother’s actions earned his smaller share.

Sheeba789 − NTA your brother got less of a share because of his actions. He burned bridges with people and he has to live with the consequences. Plus it sounds like you went above and beyond to have a great relationship with your grandfather, that is your money and to give your brother more than your grandfather thought he deserved is kinda disrespectful imo.

This user warned sharing would enable her brother’s laziness, disrespecting her granddad’s intent.

Ellai15 − NTA. And frankly, if you share it you would be. Your grandfather wanted to 1. Reward the grandchild that was good to him and not a felon for stealing from him and 2. Dole out some of the tough love your parents refuse to step up and provide. Your parents are failing your brother by enabling him.

He has no reason to change his behavior because they support it. If you give in on this, they will expect you to take over supporting him when they pass. They have done nothing youi financially support you, and likely will have nothing to leave either of you. And then he WILL be homeless. Respect your grandfather's wishes.

DON'T enable your brother to be a loser unless you want to care for him like an overgrown spoiled child for the rest of his life. Set boundaries with the parents and brother. I can't stress enough how important it is that none of them see a dime from you.

This user urged her mom to stop supporting her brother, saying OP owes him nothing.

Ghargoyle − NTA Your grandfather knew what he was doing. Tell your mom to stop supporting him. She's not obligated to, and you certainly aren't.

Redditor called OP’s brother a “lazy person,” advising her to keep her inheritance.

Staceyrt − You are most definitely NTA!! It is not your turn to support your grown ass, jobless, adult, weed smoking brother so he can continue to be a grown ass, weed smoking, jobless adult. If your grandfather wanted him to have more money he would have left it to him. Do not let anyone guilt you into occupying the role of caretaker of an able bodied lazy person. Tell everyone to sod off- and use your money and inheritance wisely.

Another emphasized the will as her granddad’s final decision, supporting her stance.

GabiCoolLager − NTA. Inheritance is the last will and your grandpa made his decision.

This person stated her brother gets only what the will granted—$10,000.

Ananas_jabuka − NTA. Your grandpa left him $10,000. That is all he gets.

A Reddit user questioned her mom’s audacity to challenge the granddad’s clear intent.

[Reddit User] − NTA- I will never understand why *other people* think they can delegate what happens with someone’s inheritance. Is your mom saying your grandpa was an i**ot who didn’t know what he was doing when he decided on that split?

She’s mad that she is being a doormat for him and you won’t join. Keep that money and the house. All of it. That’s what your grandpa wanted and he’s the one who earned it all.

A Reddit user argued her grandparents would disapprove of sharing, given their reasoning.

[Reddit User] − NTA. Your parents need to stop enabling him. I personally think your grandparents would be upset if you did because they left that money to you for a reason. You have no obligation to share with your brother.

This commenter warned giving money would harm her brother, urging her parents to stop enabling.

singmelullabies1 − Honestly, YWBTA if you gave your brother any money at all. You are spot on that your parents are enabling him by paying all his bills. He has no incentive to make any changes in his life.

I would ask your parents 'what do you think is going to happen to brother when you two run out of money, or when you die? I sure as hell won't be paying his bills. You aren't helping him -- you are actually hurting him because he's 27 and still can't take care of himself. I won't participate in ruining his life.

At the heart of this story is a question of fairness—not the kind measured in dollars, but in effort, care, and consequences. Her brother made choices. So did her grandfather. And now she’s being asked to undo both.

Would giving her brother a slice of the pie buy peace—or just bake in decades of resentment? Should love mean sacrifice, even when it hurts your own future? Drop your take in the comments—because when inheritance meets dysfunction, everyone’s got a hot opinion.

Annie Nguyen

Annie Nguyen

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