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Woman Keeps Partner’s Accident Secret From Estranged Family To Shield Her New Life, Eventually They Find Out

by Jeffrey Stone
December 2, 2025
in Social Issues

A 27-year-old Redditor, juggling a newborn and their wife Alison’s hospital stay after a serious accident, faced a fiery call from her estranged, disapproving parents, livid for being left uninformed. Broken bones and surgeries already had chaos reigning, yet the in-laws’ outrage sparked a fresh feud.

Reddit’s AITA buzzes over this clash of loyalty and silence, protecting family peace or snubbing kin? Emotions run high in this saga, where moral dilemmas and distant ties collide like a storm in a stressed-out household.

Partner has an accident, woman decides not to tell her in-laws to protect her family.

Woman Keeps Partner’s Accident Secret From Estranged Family To Shield Her New Life, Eventually They Find Out
Not the actual photo.

'AITA for not informing my wife's parents when she had an accident?'

My wife (Alison - 29F) just had an accident. She broke her leg and ribs and had to undergo surgeries.

I (27F) was a huge mess the whole time. I tried to balance being there for her with caring for our son (he's 4 months old) which was pretty tough.

Alison is now stable and feeling much better but still hasn't been discharged.

Alison's parents do not talk to her much since the day she married me (they're h__ophobic).

It would be one conversation or email during the holidays and that's it for the year.

So while I contacted my own family members for help, I didn't tell Alison's parents or siblings (also h__ophobic).

However, I received a call from her mother literally yelling at me for keeping their daughter's health issues a secret from them.

She said I had no right to hide this and that she found out through a family friend and was outraged.

I said I simply didn't think of them, and that I was sorry but Alison was thankfully doing well at the moment.

They got even more angry and said I should have informed them, as her family.

This kind of went over my head and this is where I was the AH. I said our son and I were now Alison's family. That broke into a whole...

I feel bad for escalating things unnecessarily but I don't know if I was the AH and should apologize. Let me know please.

With Alison stable but still hospitalized, her spouse was juggling newborn diapers and hospital visits when the in-laws’ call turned a tough situation into a full-blown showdown.

The Redditor didn’t notify Alison’s parents about her accident, citing their minimal contact due to past disapproval of their marriage. It’s a classic case of family estrangement clashing with expectations of duty.

On one hand, the Redditor was overwhelmed, prioritizing Alison and their son over a family that barely checks in. On the other, Alison’s parents felt entitled to know, arguing they’re still her family, no matter the rift.

Let’s unpack this. The Redditor’s focus was on immediate needs, caring for Alison and their baby. Given the parents’ history of limited contact (one holiday email a year!), it’s understandable why they weren’t top of mind.

Yet, the parents’ outrage suggests they still see themselves as central to Alison’s life, despite their distance. This tension reflects a broader social issue: how do we define family obligations in strained relationships?

A 2021 Pew Research study found that 27% of Americans are estranged from a close family member, often due to differing values or past conflicts. This dynamic can make communication during crises tricky, as both sides grapple with unspoken expectations.

Dr. John Gottman, a renowned relationship expert, once said in his book The Science of Trust: Emotional Attunement for Couples,“Tolerance by believing there are always two valid realities. Making understanding the partner the goal of listening.”

Here, the Redditor might not have considered how Alison’s parents, despite their disapproval, still feel a parental instinct to know about their daughter’s well-being.

But the parents’ aggressive approach did little to bridge the gap. The Redditor’s quip about their son and them being Alison’s “real family” was a defensive jab, escalating the argument but reflecting their truth: Alison’s chosen family is their priority.

So, what’s the solution? Open communication could help. The Redditor might ask Alison if she wants her parents informed in the future, setting clear boundaries.

For the parents, rebuilding trust with Alison before expecting updates is key.

This situation invites us all to reflect: how do you balance respect for someone’s choices with family ties that feel frayed? Let’s see Reddit thoughts below!

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

Some believe the OP is justified in not informing their wife’s homophobic family about her health issues, given their estrangement.

StAlvis − NTA

"I received a call from her mother literally yelling at me for keeping their daughter's health issues a secret from them.

She said I had no right to hide this and that she found out through a family friend and was outraged."

If Alison wanted you to know, Alison would tell you herself"

tinyd71 − I'm not sure how you escalated things unnecessarily. Alison's family don't want to talk to her during good times (marriage, a baby, etc.),

it stands to reason you'd assume they're not interested in her and her life during bad times (such as this accident). NTA

Brainjacker − I said our son and I were now Alison's family This all day. NTA and best wishes for her quick healing.

ciaogo − NTA - it doesn't seem as if your MIL or BIL have Alison's best interest at heart

since they seem more interested in using this accident as a data point as to why it's ok for them to dunk on you and your relationship.

If they didn't care to talk to her regularly enough to have realized that something seemed wrong or that something major had happened to Alison,

then they certainly do not get to use dunk on you for not informing them.

They sound awful and you have nothing to apologize to them about. If Alison wanted to tell them then Alison would've asked you.

The fact that she didn't meant that these people - who are TA in this story - don't now have the right to come after you. Good luck with her...

faintedlove − NTA first of all, i hope you're all doing ok and your wife has good recovery.

And not contacting her family is a choice she's made, you're respecting that by but telling them.

I don't think you escalated things too much, you've stood your ground and that's what's most important.

Others emphasize the legal and moral right to protect the wife’s privacy, especially given the family’s h__ophobia.

Aiurar − She said I had no right to hide this and that she found out through a family friend and was outraged.

In most of the US states, you actually have every right to keep her health information private as her spouse.

Only Alison or her legal surrogate decision maker can disclose protected health information, and you are higher on that list than them.

If they want information, they should start by not alienating you by being h__ophobic assholes, so NTA.

Block their numbers for a while, and tell the nurse to not share any information with anyone claiming to be family without verifying with you or Alison first.

yesnomaybeso456 − NTA - before legal marriage, this would be the time when a h__ophobic family would swoop in

and refuse you entrance to the hospital room.

Some seek clarification on whether the wife was consulted about informing her family.

crocodilezebramilk − Info: Did you ask your wife if she wanted to contact them?

Imo her opinion is the only one that matters here, if she didn’t think of them either or didn’t want to contact them then N T A

nycgarbagewhore − INFO: how long was she in the hospital and getting surgeries?

And was she able to tell you if she wanted them to know? Did you ask her?

One person humorously suggests deflecting the family’s complaints.

Mustng1966 − NAH - They are h__ophobic and never contacted her after she married so they deserve nada, zilch.

Just tell them all that you thought they were abducted by h__ophobic aliens that took them to their planet, H__ophobia, and you had no way to contact them.

This Redditor’s hospital drama shines a light on the messy dance of family loyalty and personal boundaries.

With Alison on the mend and their baby in tow, the Redditor stood her ground, but was her silence toward the in-laws a fair move or a step too far?

How would you handle a call from estranged relatives demanding answers? Should the Redditor have looped them in, or was protecting her family’s peace the right call? Drop your hot takes!

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone is a valuable freelance writer at DAILY HIGHLIGHT. As a senior entertainment and news writer, Jarvis brings a wealth of expertise in the field, specifically focusing on the entertainment industry.

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