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Woman Refuses To Let Her Sister-in-Law Meet The Baby, Claims She’s Just Following The Same Rules Back

by Marry Anna
November 7, 2025
in Social Issues

Having a baby changes everything, priorities, boundaries, and sometimes even family relationships. Everyone swears they’ll be supportive until someone feels left out. Then it’s all whispers, screenshots, and passive-aggressive posts.

That’s exactly where one new mom found herself. After respecting her sister-in-law’s strict no-visitor rule for three months, she imposed the same restriction when her own baby arrived. But instead of understanding, her sister-in-law fired back with social-media shade.

Suddenly, the family was divided over who was truly being unfair.

Woman Refuses To Let Her Sister-in-Law Meet The Baby, Claims She’s Just Following The Same Rules Back
Not the actual photo

'AITA for not inviting my brother and sister in law to meet my baby because they didn't have visitors for three months after they had their baby?'

When my sister in law had her son approx 7 months ago her and my brother did the "we're taking this time as a family and we won't be having...

hospital or meeting the baby for the first couple months, thanks for respecting our time etc" thing and they did not have any visitors over for the first three months...

I totally respected this. Brother didn't really care about visitors either way, but she specifically didn't want any visitors.

So anyway, I had my baby two weeks ago, and I did have visitors in the hospital and at my house, and my close family members (mom, sisters, cousins, godmother,...

Yesterday I had a family dinner where my family came over and cooked for me and held the baby, etc.

Some people posted pics of this get-together on social media. I DID NOT POST THEM!

My sister in law saw these pics and was like I would love to meet the baby, bla bla bla. She told my brother to ask why they weren't invited.

Brother didn't really care; he just asked on her behalf. I was like, "Y'all can meet my baby after three months.

Thank you for respecting my choice. You didn't want me to meet my nephew for three months, so you can meet your niece after three months."

So now she posted a subtweet about me, and I don't get why. She didn't let people meet her baby for three months, so why should I let her meet...

I respected her choice, so I don't understand what the problem is.

So here’s the scene, one sister holds up a “No visitors for three months” sign after her baby is born, and now her sibling is hitting back with a “You can meet my baby after three months, too” card.

The OP chose to respect her sister-in-law’s boundary (no visitors for the nephew) by applying the same rule to her niece. Cue the social media subtweets and hurt feelings.

From the OP’s side, she set a clear precedent and followed it. She thinks fairness means treating boundaries the same way they were given.

From Marnie’s side, she probably expected more flexibility once the roles reversed, or maybe the situation felt differently when her baby was involved. Emotions run deep when family, babies, and expectations mix.

Here’s where the broader flair comes in, newborns and visiting rules. According to credible sources, it’s totally valid for parents to delay visits. One article explains: “Parents should feel empowered to set firm boundaries about who visits and when.”

Another says, “Visiting a newborn is by invitation only” and encourages respect for the family’s own timeline.  There’s no rule saying you must allow cousins or siblings over right away.

Dr. Ahmad Bailony, pediatrics chief, once said : “Some parents may feel overwhelmed by visitors and choose to delay them because of bonding or health concerns.”

That really applies, the OP’s sister-in-law’s decision to go visitor-free made sense in her world, and the OP is signalling that her world allowed near-immediate family.

It might help to gently call a sibling summit. Explain, “Hey, when you set no visitors for your newborn, I respected that boundary; now I’m asking you to respect mine.”

Then shift from scoreboard mode into understanding mode, ask how Marnie felt, validate her experience, and share how the OP’s feels too.

Maybe open the door earlier, too, “We’ve got this timeline, but sooner works if you’re ready.” That way everyone knows you’re team family, not team tit-for-tat.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

This group of Redditors pointed out that the brother and sister-in-law’s “no visitors” rule was applied equally to everyone, not targeted toward OP.

SpeedBlitzX − I think the reason she isn't happy is that they feel like you singled them out.

Whereas when they told everyone they could visit after three months, that rule applied to everyone.

No one got special treatment. When they had their kid. It looks like you took it personally, though. YTA.

PantsPartyPirate − YTA and being very petty, as everyone else was invited to visit yours, and the three-month rule for your niece applied to everyone.

There are reasons why some parents say no visitors for a while. Post birth recovery, postnatal depression, unusual mother/baby health issues, for example.

lrknst − YTA, they had a blanket rule for everyone, which helped Mom recover after giving birth. Lots of hormones and emotions and firsts!

It can be a very stressful time for some. It’s clear you took that personally and are now singling them out to try to prove some non-existent point.

-usual-suspect- − My gosh, you are very petty, aren’t you? YTA. You invited everyone but them. They invited no one.

[Reddit User] − YTA. You singled her out while she treated everyone the same.

Her motivation was keeping her baby safe from germs and all of them bonding as a nuclear family. Your motivation was to be spiteful.

These users described OP’s decision as “weaponizing motherhood”, using her newborn as a tool for revenge.

tealcandtrip − YTA. Wow. Your baby’s birth is being used as a weapon to punish another mother for their parenting choice by excluding them from the family.

I’m sure this won’t breed resentment at all. I hope you like uncomfortable holidays, because you don’t easily come back from that.

I’m sure the cousins wouldn’t have been friends anyway.

sheramom4 − YTA. They didn't exclude you and just you from meeting their daughter. Everyone had the same rules.

You don't have the same rules for your child, but are already using your newborn as a pawn for your pettiness.

nursepenguin36 − YTA. You claim you respected their decision, but in reality, you got offended and decided to retaliate when you had a baby.

They made a blanket request for privacy to allow them to have private time.

You chose to solely bar them from visiting purely out of spite and pettiness because they denied you access to their child.

[Reddit User] − YTA, you are a very petty, immature individual.

A more empathetic group highlighted that the sister-in-law might have faced medical complications or postpartum depression, making her earlier request completely reasonable.

Mmm_hummus − YTA. Has it not occurred to you (or occurred to some people in this thread) that she could have been recovering medically?

Giving birth is physically traumatising. My own sister almost died from sepsis and took much longer to recover.

Many medical issues can be embarrassing, such as prolapses, so she might not want to tell everyone.

She could have had PPD or a number of other complications. Taking time to recover is really normal and not something you should punish someone over.

You're being weird either way.

Visible-Steak-7492 − YTA. I totally respected this, no you didn't. You're literally using her personal boundary as a reason to punish her by making her feel excluded.

That's not respect, that's being unnecessarily petty and cruel. I wonder if you're going to do the same to your child when they grow up and start establishing boundaries as...

StraightJacketRacket − YTA for being offended at your brother and SIL's requirement that they isolate during the newborn period.

WTF? They were entitled to make that decision as many parents have in recent times, but you clearly don't respect them for it.

For someone old enough to make a baby, you sure don't sound done maturing.

Finally, this group called OP’s behavior “childish” and “cruel,” suggesting she needed to “grow up” and stop turning her baby into a pawn.

Left-Occasion-8445 − Yeah, you’re a mom now. Grow up and stop being so petty.

You sound like a little kid, she didn’t, so why should I? YTA. Seriously, grow up.

ajjmcd − Evidently, you did not respect their choice if you’re choosing to single them out like this. Seems rather childish.

Ambitious-Lettuce-48 − YTA, you're being very immature. Don't weaponise your child.

Family feuds over new babies can spiral faster than diaper changes. The OP’s “three-month rule reversal” may sound petty, but it mirrors the exact boundary her sister-in-law once enforced. Fair play or calculated payback?

That depends on whether you see it as honoring equality or fueling resentment. Parenthood can blur the line between protecting your peace and proving a point.

Do you think the OP’s response was poetic justice or unnecessary drama? How would you handle a double-standard when family rules suddenly flip? Share your thoughts below!

Marry Anna

Marry Anna

Hello, lovely readers! I’m Marry Anna, a writer at Dailyhighlight.com. As a woman over 30, I bring my curiosity and a background in Creative Writing to every piece I create. My mission is to spark joy and thought through stories, whether I’m covering quirky food trends, diving into self-care routines, or unpacking the beauty of human connections. From articles on sustainable living to heartfelt takes on modern relationships, I love adding a warm, relatable voice to my work. Outside of writing, I’m probably hunting for vintage treasures, enjoying a glass of red wine, or hiking with my dog under the open sky.

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