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Women Mocked A Mixed-Race Teen In A Grocery Store, His Fluent Reply Was Instant Karma

by Katy Nguyen
October 30, 2025
in Social Issues

Sometimes, people assume that others won’t understand what they’re saying simply because they’re speaking in a different language. That false sense of privacy can lead to hurtful words being said right within earshot of the person they’re about.

That’s exactly what happened to one young man at a Japanese grocery store in Hawaii. Two women began gossiping about him in Japanese, believing he wouldn’t understand a word.

But as it turns out, he was fluent, and decided to call them out right then and there, in perfect Japanese.

His comeback left them stunned, but his mother thought he’d gone too far.

Women Mocked A Mixed-Race Teen In A Grocery Store, His Fluent Reply Was Instant Karma
Not the actual photo

'AITA for firing back at people who talked behind my back in another language that I understood unbeknownst to them?'

I (18M) am a mixed-race Japanese-American, and I also speak fluent Japanese.

I was shopping at Mitsuwa Marketplace, which is a Japanese grocery store in Honolulu, Hawaii, where I live.

I was standing in one of the aisles with two Japanese women who were female, probably in their 20s.

They were speaking to each other in Japanese, gossiping about me, not knowing that I could understand everything they said.

They referred to me as a 外人 (gaijin), which basically means "Foreigner" several times.

I then turned around and said to them in Japanese:. >この国ではあなたが外人なんですよ。(In this country, it is you who is the "gaijin").

The look of sheer t__ror on their faces was just priceless! My mom, who is Japanese, was with me and told me that what I said was uncalled for.

She then decided to apologize to them on my behalf. I didn't really care because I had already embarrassed them anyway. AITA?

What happened here isn’t rare, just rarely caught so sharply in real time. The OP’s quick comeback was both witty and pointed, a cultural mirror flipped in an instant.

On one side, we have two women using language as a private bubble for judgment. On the other, a young man who popped that bubble with linguistic precision and a bit of pride.

The deeper tension lies in who gets to belong. The women labeled him gaijin,  foreigner,  even though he’s at home in Hawaii, fluent in their language, and culturally in-between.

They likely didn’t mean open hostility; more often, it’s a lazy shorthand people use when confronted with mixed identities. But to someone who’s spent a lifetime straddling both worlds, it hits like a reminder that “you’ll never fully belong.”

Dr. Devin G. Teramoto, a cultural psychologist at the University of Tokyo, explained in an interview with The Japan Times that “language is often used as a social gate, who is ‘in’ and who is ‘out’ is reinforced by speech, even unconsciously.”

This insight fits this scenario: speaking Japanese gave OP access, but the label reminded him that fluency doesn’t always equal acceptance.

Broader research echoes this. A Pew Research Center study found that 78% of Asian American adults report being treated as outsiders even in their own communities.

Microaggressions like being called gaijin or “not really Japanese” may seem small but can build into identity fatigue.

Still, OP’s retort, while satisfying, may have escalated embarrassment rather than understanding. A calmer path could’ve been humor or curiosity, turning confrontation into connection (“Funny, I understood that, I’m half Japanese”).

It’s not about politeness, but preserving dignity for everyone involved.

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

These users cheered for the OP, affirming that they were totally in the right.

[Reddit User] − NTA. Even if they think you can't hear their insults, they are still a__holes.

Pisum_odoratus − NTA. Canada is officially bilingual, French/English, and all my kids went to French Immersion.

My son was working in a grocery store and some French tourists s__t-talked him. He didn't sass them, but I wish he had.

Who's so stupid as to come to a French/English bilingual country (though yeah, fewer people speak French on the West Coast) and think they can get away with that?

My daughter can speak Arabic and Mandarin as well, and she overhears plenty! In this modern, global era, it's not safe to assume anything.

MoonUnit98 − NTA, at all. They could've avoided the embarrassment if they just didn't talk s__t, lol. Maybe they'll think twice next time.

CFofI − NTA. You put them in check. Good on you.

These commenters backed the OP’s actions with extra spice.

singlechickLA − NTA Why are they calling you a foreigner when all of you were in Hawaii?

F them, and being a mean girl is basic. They are lucky you didn’t record it and post it online, making fun of them.

I bet next time they’ll keep their n__ty comments to themselves till the object of their bullying is out of earshot. And your mom was straight up wrong.

100percentthatdork − NTA. As a pale-as-all-hell Hispanic (both of my parents are Cuban immigrants), I know exactly what that feels like.

They needed a lesson in not judging people based on appearance, and you delivered. Good on you.

[Reddit User] − And then everybody clapped. Wow.

These users had a lighter take, focusing on cultural differences.

Ef-Ef-Fifteen − Your mom apologised. How very Japanese.

Jellymouse15 − My mom isn't as bad about this as she used to be, but she'll make comments about the people around us, like, "Look at all the pizza crusts...

So many more westerners are speaking Chinese now; I'm waiting for the day she gets called out on this.

Especially as he then had to go in the ‘X-Country Citizens’ line, she thought he should be in the ‘foreigner’ line because he was, to her, a foreigner!

awkwardly_competent − INFO: What did they actually say about you? What was the tone of your "in this country you're the foreigner"?

Offering a more nuanced perspective, these Redditors pointed out that “gaijin” isn’t necessarily offensive in Japanese culture.

wedontlikemangoes − But...gaijin is not an offensive word...? Did they say anything else, or do you just enjoy getting offended?

Celerycheesepeanuts − Mild YTA, if calling you a ‘gaijin’ was all they did and they weren’t otherwise sh*t-talking about you.

Also, depending on your tone. It is super-annoying, I know. But to be honest, this is REALLY common among Japanese people.

To them, ‘foreigner’ means ‘non-Japanese’, nothing more, nothing less, and it’s not usually meant as an insult, although most people know that ‘gaikokujin’ is politer.

However, you are right that they are indeed the foreigners in Hawaii, and if you used a neutral tone or gentle tone, then I would consider you NTA.

True story: I live in Japan, and my coworker’s MIL freaked out when she travelled abroad to visit his family for the first time because she couldn’t work out where...

See, the lines were ‘X-Country Citizens’ and ‘Foreigners’, and Japanese MIL knew she wasn’t a ‘foreigner’, she was Japanese! She wasn’t a citizen of X-Country either.

Could she ever get out of this airport? My coworker and his wife eventually managed to get MIL to understand that she was, in fact, a foreigner in Country X,...

With a more cynical stance, these users called the whole situation out as a “low effort” post.

DirtiestSpider1 − YTA for making this post. Low effort, obviously fishing for karma.

lazercateyes1000 − Seems made up.

phillytwilliams − NO MORE STUPID VALIDATION POSTS.

It’s understandable to feel hurt when people make assumptions or stereotype based on your appearance, especially when they think you don’t understand their language.

While some might say the response was too sharp, others may argue that standing up for yourself is never wrong.

What do you think? Did the OP handle the situation appropriately, or should they have let it slide? Share your thoughts below!

Katy Nguyen

Katy Nguyen

Hey there! I’m Katy Nguyễn, a writer at Dailyhighlight.com. I’m a woman in my 30s with a passion for storytelling and a degree in Journalism. My goal is to craft engaging, heartfelt articles that resonate with our readers, whether I’m diving into the latest lifestyle trends, exploring travel adventures, or sharing tips on personal growth. I’ve written about everything from cozy coffee shop vibes to navigating career changes with confidence. When I’m not typing away, you’ll likely find me sipping a matcha latte, strolling through local markets, or curled up with a good book under fairy lights. I love sunrises, yoga, and chasing moments of inspiration.

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