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Woman Ruins A Folk Concert Simply By Knitting And Dramatically Leaving The Show, Hinting At A Hidden Disorder

by Jeffrey Stone
December 24, 2025
in Social Issues

A peaceful evening at an intimate folk music theater turned tense when the woman beside a thrilled attendee whipped out yarn and needles, her rhythmic motions and faint clicks shattering the hushed, emotional atmosphere.

Eager for a deeply immersive experience in the seated venue where every subtle note hangs in silence, the concertgoer endured the distraction for ages before quietly flashing a phone note, apologizing profusely and suggesting she pause or slide to one of the nearby empty seats. In a shocking twist, the knitter shot a furious glare, huffed dramatically, packed up in a storm, and stormed out with her partner halfway through the heartfelt set.

Redditor politely asked a woman to stop knitting at a quiet concert, sparking etiquette debate.

Woman Ruins A Folk Concert Simply By Knitting And Dramatically Leaving The Show, Hinting At A Hidden Disorder
Not the actual photo.

'AITA for asking the lady sitting next to me at a concert to stop knitting?'

I went to a concert tonight at a seated venue to see a folk singer. The music is relatively tame/quiet and fairly emotional -

in my opinion, seeing this artist is a pretty immersive music experience, at least for me.

I was really excited to see this particular show at a seated theater where it’s easier to just focus on the music.

I’d venture a guess that most of the people who would go to this type of show are going because they’re emotionally invested in this person’s music.

The show starts, and I notice the woman sitting directly next to me is knitting. Odd, I thought, but okay.

But as the show went on, I kept finding myself so distracted by this knitting.

I must have tried for a solid 30 minutes to ignore it, but the constant motion in my peripheral vision + the quiet clicking of the needles kept stealing my...

After a while, I felt like I couldn’t focus on the show at all, and all I could think about was whether I should try to politely say something.

The woman was with a partner, and I noticed on their other side there were 2-3 open seats.

So I finally worked up the courage to politely say something. I thought the best and least disruptive way to do that was to write a note on my phone...

The note said (this is a direct copy/paste) - “I’m so sorry to ask and I know this is probably ridiculous but the knitting is distracting me from enjoying the...

would you mind either stopping or moving one seat over? Again I’m sorry“

Idk, I assumed anyone who knitted in public, and especially someone at this kind of very chill show, was probably a generally chill human,

so I was not expecting the kind of negative reaction that followed.

The woman gave me the NASTIEST look, let out an angry sigh, threw her hands up, dramatically stuffed her knitting stuff into her bag,

huffed and puffed to her partner, and then got up and COMPLETELY LEFT THE SHOW.

I was so baffled by how angry she got, especially since I tried really hard to phrase this as politely as I could.

I even considered that maybe there are reasons beyond my understanding why someone might not be able to sit still during a show

and might need to keep their hands busy, (Neurodivergence? Some sort of recovery? Some other reason?)

so I REALLY tried to avoid speaking up out of sensitivity, and again it’s why I included the suggestion that maybe she could just slide over instead of stopping completely.

I realize that knitting is definitely not the MOST disruptive thing a person could do,

and I couldn’t tell if me asking her to stop was unreasonable and maybe I should have just sucked it up,

but I thought I was polite about it and I’m still just really shocked at how mad she got and even more shocked that she completely left the show halfway...

So - AITA for asking her to stop knitting or move one seat over?

ETA - I think the use of the word “concert” is misleading people here and people might think concert = loud environment.

This was a fairly quiet folk show at a theater, as opposed to a rock or pop concert at an arena.

The room was dead silent outside of the performance itself. The set included some full band songs, some solo acoustic, some that were just vocals + fiddle + guitar.

The needles did make a clicking sound, probably equivalent to someone typing on their phone with long nails.

This Redditor’s experience highlights a classic clash at quieter performances, like folk or acoustic sets, where silence amplifies everything, even needle clicks that might seem minor elsewhere.

OP went out of their way to be considerate, suggesting a simple seat switch instead of demanding a full stop, and even pondered if the knitting might stem from a need to stay focused, like for some with ADHD.

On one side, constant peripheral movement and sounds can genuinely pull attention away in pin-drop venues. Etiquette guides often stress staying still to respect performers and neighbors. Fidgeting is a no-go because it breaks the spell for everyone.

Yet, others point out knitting can help concentration, especially for those who focus better with busy hands. Research shows fidgeting aids attention in ADHD, and experts suggest non-disruptive ways to manage it.

As Professor Julie Schweitzer noted in a 2024 article, “We have good evidence that fidgeting itself seems to be associated with better attention.” Relevance here? In public shared spaces like theaters, the key is balance, perhaps choosing silent fidgets or back-row seats to avoid bothering others.

Etiquette expert Lisa Grotts emphasizes that the cardinal rule at live performances is to “not do anything that distracts from the music itself,” ensuring mutual respect for everyone’s experience.

One study notes: “it may be beneficial to provide accommodations that allow and even facilitate adults with ADHD to fidget in a non–disruptive, but effective manner.” Relevance here? In public shared spaces like theaters, the key is balance, perhaps choosing silent fidgets or back-row seats to avoid bothering others.

This ties into broader audience manners in live arts. With venues designed to carry every whisper, small actions ripple big. Reports on concert behavior show distractions like noises or movements frustrate many fans, emphasizing mutual respect keeps the vibe welcoming.

Ultimately, polite communication opens doors, but reactions vary. Neutral tip: If something bugs you, a kind word (or note!) early on works wonders. If you’re the fidgeter, scoping quieter options shows thoughtfulness too.

See what others had to share with OP:

Some people assert that OP is NTA because knitting would be audibly and visually distracting in a quiet acoustic show.

leboydiabolique − OP is absolutely NTA. Anyone saying otherwise has never been to a stripped down folk / acoustic show -

you can hear a pin drop as the audiences are generally very quiet, similar to a classical concert.

The clickety-clack of knitting needles would certainly be audible, and would certainly be distracting if you were sat close.

Plus, as someone who has played dozens of shows like this, seeing someone in the audience just knitting away would be demoralizing as a performer and would feel pretty disrespectful.

I don't knit, so I would assume it had their full attention and they weren't particularly interested in my music.

Content-Plenty-268 − NTA. Anyone who’d walk out on a music performance if she can’t knit her way through it is on her own.

You were entirely within bounds making a reasonable request to remove a distracting activity, not customary at this sort of a public gathering, out of your peripheral view and earshot.

Your suggestion was polite and considerate. The lady was the problem, not you.

Illustrious-Shirt569 − NTA. You asked nicely and moving one chair over seems like a reasonable suggestion.

I find the clicking of needles to be a soothing sound when I knit, but I agree that it’s definitely a sound that isn’t easy to ignore

(especially if they’re metal). Her reaction was pretty out of proportion to the ask.

[Reddit User] − Lol on the surface her knitting does seem pretty harmless and chill, but at a place like that it's just straight f__kery.

It would bother me too to see the constant knitting motion in my peripheral vision and hearing a faint clicks.

You handled it pretty well. The lady seemed very entitled. Her partner was probably aware of her Karen-like behavior,

and he may have made the call to leave the show instead of letting her cause a scene.

Some knitters acknowledge that while knitting helps concentration, it is inappropriate and distracting in a quiet concert setting.

Ms-DangerNoodle − I’m a knitter and you are NTA. Leaving this comment to explain why someone would do this.

I personally struggle to concentrate when my hands aren’t busy. So eg. in a meeting or listening to a podcast,

if I’m knitting or doodling or doing something to keep my hands busy it’s actually easier to listen.

So I bet she was better able to enjoy the music while knitting. However there are social norms in a theatre, knitting does make a clicking noise,

so she was the a__hole for taking her knitting to a show, and then even more the a__hole for being dramatic when you asked her to stop.

DalaDalan − So I am absolutely someone who might knit in a setting like that, in part due to ADHD.

And the ADHD is exactly why I can totally see something random like that being disproportionately distracting.

I would have had zero issue with a request like that and happily moved over -or quit knitting if there was no other option. Definitely NTA.

Others emphasize that OP handled the situation politely and the woman’s dramatic reaction was unwarranted.

betteroffalone70 − Lol this thread is crazy NTA you did it as politely as you could.

If someone right next to me was fidgeting for hours at a show I’d lose my mind no matter how quiet people want to say kitting is you’re going to...

Oufoupia − You were polite, She overreacted. She was annoying and inconsiderate of other people having to constantly hear the needles clicking.

It would be torture for me hearing that. Don’t keep thinking abt it, you were not at fault.

Maybe you could have changed seats though but who in their mind would think to act this mad like she did for a simple polite request

ErB17 − Clear as day NTA. Don't even need to explain.

Dunesgirl − I was at a Broadway show and the woman seated next to me was filing her nails.

I’m not talking about a quick fix for a broken one, I’m saying full on with an emery board!

I was not as nice as OP. I simply said that needs to stop right now, please. And it did.

Was the polite note reasonable in a super-quiet folk show, or did the knitter deserve to craft in peace? How would you handle constant clicks pulling you from the music, grin and bear it, or kindly ask for a pause? Share your hot takes below!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/0 votes | 0%

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone is a valuable freelance writer at DAILY HIGHLIGHT. As a senior entertainment and news writer, Jeffrey brings a wealth of expertise in the field, specifically focusing on the entertainment industry.

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