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Woman Shares Her Poverty Struggle, Then Reveals The Cruel Comment That Broke Her

by Annie Nguyen
July 31, 2026
in Social Issues

Sometimes, a single comment from someone else can bring back years of feelings that people have been trying to overcome. Many struggles are invisible, and people often judge someone’s situation without knowing the battles, sacrifices, or setbacks behind the scenes. A job title or income level rarely tells the full story of a person’s journey.

The original poster (OP) shared how a conversation with their boss about minimum wage unexpectedly reopened painful memories of years spent struggling financially and being judged for their work. After surviving difficult experiences and slowly building a more stable life, OP was hurt by the idea that people in low-paying jobs simply lack ambition.

Read on to see how Reddit responded to OP’s emotional reminder about dignity, resilience, and the assumptions people make about others.

A person reflects on the shame and judgment they faced while working low-wage jobs and finding pride in surviving and improving their life

Woman Shares Her Poverty Struggle, Then Reveals The Cruel Comment That Broke Her
Not the actual photo

'Tonight I was reminded of how people see me'

I'm 30 and I work in a call center making 30k. For years I worked more hours making much less than this just to get by.

I have my sights set on a job making 45k hopefully by next year. The last ten years have not been easy.

I've been abused, harassed, threatened, had my wages stolen by employers, generally treated like garbage, and have had two serious mental breakdowns from stress.

One of the worst things I've experienced is constant gaslighting.

Being told my life can't be that bad or because I'm not working a "real" job and someone somewhere has it worse.

And, of course, the isolation is horrible.

Most middle-class people want nothing to do with someone in their mid-twenties who makes a low wage unless they're a student or an intern.

I have been shamed and laughed at on dates for my job and mocked by exes' families.

I began to lose friends the year I didn't go to college and everyone else did. At this point I have almost no one left except my family.

Most of the time I try not to compare myself to other people. I've been suicidal for most of my life.

I consider any day I'm able to meet all of my goals a good day.

I consider the fact that I've been working full stop since I turned 19 an accomplishment.

I don't act impulsively or have any addictions. I don't even "like" to have "fun" the way most people do and try to spend the majority of my time working...

Going from being essentially homeless to owning a newer used car and being able to pay all

of my bills on time (if not early) every month is a big deal to me and it took a long f__king time to get here.

My therapist and my boss are both younger than me. I try not to let that bother me either.

Today my boss and I were chatting. She made a comment about moving to Canada for health care

(our health care doesn't cover a medication that is both necessary for her and very expensive).

She then followed up by saying she was joking and had hope for our state following a few progressive (for us)

measures passing in the recent mid-term. I said that I was glad that the minimum wage was finally being raised.

She said that she didn't believe in raising the minimum wage because she thought that people who make that much don't believe in bettering their lives or want to "be"...

The "minimum," she said, should be little enough that people feel ashamed to work that job, and that the "better"

people won't be able to tolerate the shame for more than a year before looking for a "real" job.

People who work low wage jobs DO feel shame, though. Frequently, people k__l themselves because they don't know a way out of poverty.

I personally have the emotional and psychological scars to show that being poor has long-term effects and getting out of it is far from easy.

I worked over 50 hours/week for over four years just to afford my rent. Then I lost my job and had to move back in with my parents.

It took me three months to find a part-time job. Two years to find a better part-time job that I could walk to.

A year to get a beater car. Two years to get a better beater car, though I didn't know it was a beater at the time.

Two more years to get a newer used car after the last one died. I didn't qualify for it by myself so I had to purchase it with my brother.

We have to wait a year to take him off the title so that he can get his own car.

I slept on my mom's couch for five years. My best friend died of cancer while I worked my b__t off for $800/month three thousand miles away.

I went to school when I could. I have a sleep disorder now and cry almost everyday. I don't want to be alive but I'm still here, at least for...

I try to remind myself that I've done the best I can and should be proud for that reason. I beat poverty.

I did it by giving up almost everything most 20-somethings get to enjoy and working. I didn't party or date or get to have fun, even though I wanted to.

When someone younger than me who has never worked a minimum wage job tells me that people like me are losers, it hurts.

It sucks to remember that this is how most people think, even if they don't say it out loud.

I've heard it before and I'll hear it again and it will hurt every time.

I'm not going to self-harm tonight and I'm not going to cry all night either.

I cried on my way home and now I'm going to get myself a small oreo mcflurry and watch something funny.

I hope you don't judge people unless you've shared their experiences.

And if you do, then I hope you at least have the decency to keep your thoughts to yourself.

EDIT: Wow, I can't believe my post blew up like this! I just want to say thank you to everyone who offered words of encouragement.

I also want to thank the individuals who gilded me! I definitely thought I'd wake up to maybe 50 karma at most and didn't expect this much validation. I'm still...

I'm a little worried that my tone failed to convey a large part of what was on my mind last night in favor of emphasizing how hard I work toward...

While it's absolutely true that part of the reason I work my ass off is to eventually become successful (financially stable, happy, experienced at the things I choose to do--like...

what I really wanted to get across is that all human beings deserve dignity regardless of their station or ambitions.

I truly believe that most of the toxic things we believe about lower class people were planted

and fostered by those who already have more wealth and power than most of us could ever dream of.

It upsets me to see people who used to be at the very bottom work their way up to a place of some esteem, only to turn their backs on...

A large part of my current success (if you could call it that) is tireless hard work. I am many people's go-to person for knowledge and assistance.

However, an even bigger part of it is luck. I happened into my current position from a job in retail making $9/hour.

Not many people go from 9/hour to 15/hour in a matter of months, so in that respect I was incredibly fortunate.

Without that good fortune I would still be destroying my body for less than a living wage,

working ten and twelve hour shifts on hard warehouse floors until I hurt too much to keep moving.

I predict that my job will eventually become automated or outsourced.

There are lots of people where I work who are older and were displaced from their careers by ageism.

This is why we need a livable minimum wage and, eventually, a solution to automation in the form of a basic income.

I hear people complain all the time that "I didn't get x, so neither should anyone else."

This way of thinking is counter-intuitive and counterproductive to our advancement as a society. It's also k__ling people. Yes--actually k__ling them.

Shout out to all the incredible people chasing their dreams despite wage slavery and class o__ression!

The only way for us to beat the mentality that there should be a timeline on our success and happiness is to defy it as often as possible.

Start college at 40. Write a book at 50. And when people say ignorant s__t, feel sorry for them.

They're limiting their own growth by projecting timelines onto themselves and others, and you don't need to subject yourself to that or take any part in it. Cheers!

A person’s worth is not measured by their paycheck, job title, or how quickly they reach the milestones society expects.

Yet many people quietly carry the burden of being judged by those standards. The OP’s story is not only about working a low-wage job. It is about years of fighting to survive while feeling invisible, misunderstood, and dismissed by people who never experienced the same struggles.

The emotional pain in this situation comes from the collision between personal effort and public perception. The OP spent years working, adapting, and rebuilding after difficult circumstances, eventually reaching a point of stability that many people would recognize as a major achievement. However, one comment from a boss reopened old wounds by suggesting that people in lower-paying jobs lack ambition.

For the OP, that statement was not an abstract opinion about economics. It felt like a rejection of every sacrifice, every difficult day, and every moment they continued despite exhaustion. The deepest hurt came from realizing that some people may judge the outcome of someone’s life without seeing the obstacles behind it.

A different perspective is that society often mistakes opportunity for personal virtue. People who succeed sometimes believe their achievements came only from discipline, while overlooking timing, support systems, health, family circumstances, and unexpected opportunities.

The OP’s reflection shows a more complicated reality: hard work mattered, but so did luck and access. Two people can put in equal effort and still face completely different paths because their starting points are not the same.

Psychologist Robyne Hanley-Dafoe, an expert on resilience and author of Calm Within the Storm, explains that stigma can become internalized when people repeatedly receive negative messages about who they are.

She notes that shame often develops when society attaches negative labels to someone’s circumstances, causing people to question their own value rather than recognizing the external pressures they have faced.

This insight helps explain why the boss’s comment was so painful. The OP was not simply hearing disagreement about minimum wage policy. They were hearing a message they had fought against for years: that their struggles reflected a personal failure.

But the OP’s journey tells a different story. Maintaining employment, escaping homelessness, paying bills, seeking therapy, and continuing toward future goals are all signs of persistence, not a lack of ambition.

At the same time, this story highlights how important it is to separate someone’s current position from their potential. A person working a minimum-wage or entry-level job is not a finished product. They are a person at a specific point in life, often carrying experiences that others cannot see.

The OP’s decision to recognize their own progress is meaningful. A healthier society is not one where everyone follows the same timeline; it is one where people are allowed dignity while they build their lives. Success should not be defined only by how far someone has climbed, but also by how much strength it took to keep moving.

Check out how the community responded:

These commenters encouraged OP and rejected judging someone’s worth by their job

AnActualAxolotl − I don't think you're a loser. I would care more about someone's personality and character than I do about their career. I respect the hustle too.

JustforU − I have a suggested change for your title: Today I was reminded how one specific person sees me, and why I shouldn't care. You aren't a loser.

I know it isn't worth much for an internet stranger to say this but you must love yourself and know what you're worth.

Hint: It's not in how much money you make. You are not a loser.

Keep on fighting, and you will win. God bless friend.

donottouchyourself − I’m proud of you :)

ChoppingOnionsForYou − You are NOT a loser! You are a hard worker! Don't think less of yourself because of your boss' careless comments.

[Reddit User] − You are not a loser. You're an inspiration. Keep on showing the world that you won't give up.

These users defended minimum wage workers and criticized people who look down on essential jobs

[Reddit User] − What your boss said was so f**ked up.

She should be grateful that there are people willing to do those minimum wage jobs because a lot of companies and industries relies on these type of people to function.

If it weren’t for people like you, she wouldn’t have a place to manage.

Plus you should look for ways to make a side income, cause what you’re making right now is really little,

and increasing your streams of income will help you build your wealth.

beakington − Don't ever feel bad because you do a low paid job.

People want call centre assistance and they want to drink in bars and stay in hotels

but they don't want you to get paid well for doing these things and then act like they are better than you. These people are a**holes.

The best way to stick it to them is a life well lived. I wish you every success.

BonzoTheBoss − Ignore those arseholes. It's a failure of society that someone with ANY full time job doesn't make enough to live on.

It shouldn't matter if you have a "glorious" white collar job or a "menial" blue collar job.

Work is work. We're each contributing to the economy, paying taxes.

Minimum wage should be enough to live on, and CERTAINLY should be nothing to be ashamed of.

I'm sorry that you've met people who think incorrectly, but they are knob heads.

There are plenty of people who don't look down on minimum wage workers, myself included.

blackbird-79 − You’re doing so amazingly. I worked minimum wage throughout high school.

Every job I have had is minimum wage. Congrats on doing so well for yourself.

I know you are working ten times harder than that lady. She has no right to judge people for the jobs they hold.

It’s odd that she is judging someone who is making her money and making her job possible. . ..

and also saying that the government should fund her medication, but not give you a living wage? She’s f**ked up (sorry).

You didn’t have the luxury to study at college straight after high school, you weren’t able to hold out for something better,

you will take the job in front of you now rather than get in debt and wait. I say good for you.

You’re a strong person, and I bet you know more about the world, love, and life than this woman and many of us who have had an easy life.

I hope they raise minimum wage for you.

These users discussed broader economic issues and rejected blaming individuals for systemic problems

FuckRyanSeacrest − The very predictable advice at the top of this thread "learn to code" is a f__king meme at this point.

Individual solutions to systemic problems get us nowhere.

snakewaswolf − Your coworker is delusional. Poverty is a carefully manufactured capitalist agenda that keeps the masses

so busy struggling to survive that they don’t have the time to interfere with their machinations.

75% of Americans don’t even have 5k in the bank. Your value isn’t measured by your income. Be well.

These commenters argued that work should not define a person’s identity or self-worth

yanginatep − I think a lot of people place way too much importance on what job they have, they get really invested in office politics,

their only friends are work friends, they measure their success against what they are told they should have and want by society, and I usually just find it all a...

There is nothing wrong with working a minimum wage job, there's nothing shameful about having a lower annual income.

You work a job so you can live, you don't live so you can work. Work is a means to an end.

I've been fortunate enough to have stumbled into a career where I don't have to bring my work home with me,

but I think regardless of what your job is it's important to try to maintain a healthy distance whenever possible.

Your life is your life, and even if it's something as simple as unwinding on Reddit after work, that's important, that's *your* time.

It can be difficult, but try not to base your self worth on other people's standards,

there's a good chance their lives are just as empty and unfulfilling as they want you to believe your own is.

tamila4235 − I’m really sorry to hear all that, can’t even imagine what it must feel like.

I hope you don’t let it upset you, and I hope you can see how much you have already achieved!

You seem like you have goals in life and you work hard, and I believe in you. Have a nice evening and enjoy all that tasty food 👍🏼

TheBoboRaptor − I hear you on the working a s__t job and being abused by employers.

All my friends moved away to uni and I'm still stuck doing the same s__t and have the exact same story of breakdowns and being suicidal.

I hope we find an answer for this s__t bro, I'm a message away if you need to have a joint bitching fest.

Should employers ever use financial discomfort as motivation? Why does society celebrate hard work while looking down on many of the people doing its hardest jobs? Share thoughtful perspectives below.

Annie Nguyen

Annie Nguyen

Hi, I'm Annie Nguyen. I'm a freelance writer and editor for Daily Highlight with experience across lifestyle, wellness, and personal growth publications. Living in San Francisco gives me endless inspiration, from cozy coffee shop corners to weekend hikes along the coast. Thanks for reading!

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