Boyfriend Calls Girlfriend’s Writing Hobby “Cringe” At Family Dinner, Her Reaction Leaves Him Wondering If He Was At Fault

A jittery girlfriend steps into Easter warmth, only for her boyfriend to nuke the mood: he mocks her fanfiction passion to his family. Laughter erupts, she crumbles inside, enduring a stone-silent drive home.

Reddit’s ablaze with “cruel prank” fury and rare “lighten up” shrugs. The thread’s a roast-gone-wrong reckoning.

Boyfriend makes fun of PhD girlfriend’s writing hobby in front of his whole family.

Is this wrong to be interested in writing fanfiction? Of course no. Some fanfiction even made it, got published and became well-known. Yet this boyfriend mocks her PhD girlfriend’s hobby in front of his family, claiming it “cringe”. Is it, though? Let’s find out!

Abby, a PhD-wielding brainiac, pours her heart into fanfiction, crafting 100k-word epics as practice for her dream novel.

Her boyfriend, however, saw it as a chance to flex his inner critic, questioning her doctorate’s legitimacy. From his perspective, he was just joking, maybe trying to keep things light. But Abby’s silence and swift exit suggest she felt betrayed, not tickled. It’s like he took her creative baby and tossed it into a blender publicly.

Now, let’s zoom out. Fanfiction isn’t just a quirky hobby, it’s a thriving creative space. According to a 2023 study by the Organization for Transformative Works, over 10 million fanfiction stories exist on platforms like Archive of Our Own, with writers using it to hone skills and build communities.

Abby’s not alone. Many authors, like E.L. James of Fifty Shades fame, started with fanfiction. So why the shade? The Redditor’s jab might stem from insecurity, as Reddit commenters pointed out, noting his BA versus her PhD. Instead of celebrating her, he dimmed her shine, a classic move when ego trumps empathy.

Enter Dr. John Gottman, the renowned psychologist and relationship researcher quoted in a Psychology Today article: “Of the four [A/N: horsemen of divorce], contempt, expressed through mockery, eye-rolling, sarcasm, or superiority, was found to be the single strongest predictor of divorce.”

This cuts straight to the heart of Abby’s experience, where her boyfriend’s public mockery of her fanfiction hobby, framed as a “joke”, transformed a family gathering into a stage for subtle contempt, chipping away at the respect she deserves.

Gottman’s decades of research at the “Love Lab,” observing thousands of couples, reveals how such behaviors aren’t just awkward slip-ups, they’re corrosive forces that signal deeper disdain, making partners feel small and undervalued in what should be a safe space.

Dr. Gottman explains that contempt often bubbles up from unresolved resentments or insecurities, like the boyfriend’s subtle awe (and possible envy) at dating someone with a PhD while holding only a BA.

By belittling her creative outlet, which was a private passion she trusted him with, he was indirectly questioning her worth, turning admiration into ammunition. This aligns with Gottman’s findings that contempt thrives when one partner feels “above” the other, eroding the emotional glue that holds relationships together.

In Abby’s case, it wasn’t the hobby itself under fire, but the vulnerability of sharing it, amplified in front of family like an unwelcome spotlight.

So, what’s the fix? For Abby, setting boundaries is key. Her text calling him out shows she’s not here for the nonsense.

For him, a heartfelt apology and a crash course in supporting his partner’s dreams could mend things.

More broadly, this saga highlights how we handle partners’ passions in relationships. Respecting someone’s creative spark, whether it’s fanfiction or interpretive dance, builds stronger bonds.

Here’s what people had to say to OP:

Some say OP was wrong for belittling his girlfriend’s fanfiction hobby publicly.

Others highlight OP’s insecurity and disrespect toward her education and passion.

Some emphasize that fanfiction is a legitimate creative outlet and OP’s behavior was bullying.

This Redditor’s Easter blunder turned a family meet-and-greet into a fanfiction fiasco, leaving Abby’s pride bruised and his phone on silent.

Was his “joke” a harmless misstep or a red flag waving in the wind? Should Abby give him a chance to redeem himself, or is this a sign to write him out of her story?

How would you handle a partner who turns your passion into a punchline? Drop your hot takes!