Everyone gets tired, sometimes bone-deep, can-barely-function tired. But when exhaustion becomes a competition, friendships can quickly sour.
One woman thought she was simply sharing how drained she felt after another grueling week at her demanding job. Instead, a few of her mom-friends laughed in her face, insisting she didn’t “know the meaning of tired” because she doesn’t have children.
What started as a casual comment soon spiraled into accusations, hurt feelings, and a clash between parents and child-free friends. Was she out of line for standing her ground or were her friends being dismissive?
One woman shared on Reddit that she works long hours under constant job insecurity
Parents are undeniably tired (especially with kids under six), but so are professionals juggling high-pressure jobs, students, caregivers, and those dealing with illness. When one group claims exclusivity over exhaustion, it creates resentment instead of connection.
Psychologist Dr. Susan Krauss Whitbourne explained in Psychology Today that minimizing another person’s struggles can trigger defensiveness and even damage relationships because it denies their lived reality. In other words, if someone says they’re tired, they’re tired. End of story.
Research also shows that sleep deprivation and chronic stress affect everyone differently.
According to the American Academy of Sleep Medicine, adults need 7–9 hours of sleep per night for optimal health, but nearly one-third consistently fall short, parents and non-parents alike. That means exhaustion is a shared human condition, not a parenting-exclusive experience.
Dr. Andrea Bonior, a clinical psychologist and author, summed it up best: “Empathy isn’t about deciding whose pain wins. It’s about recognizing that everyone’s struggle matters in their own context.”
So what’s the healthier approach? Instead of invalidating someone’s fatigue, acknowledge it. Saying “I get it, I’m tired too, but in a different way” validates both experiences without turning it into a competition. In this case, the Redditor’s frustration came from being talked down to, not from hearing that parenting is tough.
These are the responses from Reddit users:
Commenters agreed that parents don’t get a monopoly on exhaustion
Some Redditors roasted the friends for acting like the “misery Olympics” mattered, sharing stories of illness and deployment where fatigue was equally brutal
One user highlighted the offensive comment about “growing up and having a family,” pointing out not everyone wants or can have kids
This group shared personal experiences proving that exhaustion exists in many forms
In the end, this wasn’t just a squabble about who yawns more. It was about respect. By telling their childfree friend she couldn’t “understand tired,” the moms turned empathy into a contest. And she finally snapped.
So, was she wrong for clapping back or right to call out parental martyrdom? Is exhaustion universal, or do parents deserve the gold medal in fatigue? What do you think? Are the “Tired Olympics” real, or should we all just drop out and take a nap?
