Pricing your time can be difficult, especially when you’re balancing multiple jobs and trying to keep family dynamics intact. One woman, who works as a software engineer, found herself in a tough spot when her cousin asked her to babysit her three kids during the Christmas holiday.
The woman wanted to keep things fair, so she offered a rate based on her freelance work, but her cousin’s reaction was anything but understanding.
She suggested a rate of $35 an hour, which was a bit lower than what she’d usually charge, but still reflected her time and effort. To her surprise, her cousin and her husband were outraged, calling the rate “ridiculous” and accusing her of being selfish.
Was she wrong to set a price based on her experience and career, or were her family members being unreasonable? Scroll down to see how this dispute played out.
A woman asks for $35 an hour to babysit her cousin’s kids, which leads to a family dispute over the fairness of the rate
Time is a deeply personal resource. For many, how we spend our hours reflects our identity and values.
In this case, OP values her time according to her professional and freelance work. She set an hourly rate for babysitting that corresponded to that valuation, not because she wants to overcharge, but because her time literally has a market value.
People differ in how they value time versus money, and this preference matters for well‑being.
Studies by Ashley V. Whillans and colleagues found that individuals who prioritize time over money, that is, who treat time as precious and limited, tend to report greater happiness.
Their findings suggest that when a person consistently treats time as a resource to be protected or invested wisely, it aligns with life satisfaction and psychological well‑being.
At the same time, people whose livelihood depends on hourly billing, like freelancers, contractors, or professionals aware of their “time‑cost”, often evaluate each hour through a monetary lens.
According to research into how hourly work affects time perception and satisfaction, these individuals frequently gauge whether engaging in unpaid or low‑paid tasks is “worth it.”
That means babysitting three children for three whole days, presumably unpredictable, demanding, and likely more draining than a routine paid task, reasonably calls for compensation that reflects the value of one’s time and effort.
From a psychological perspective, OP’s decision to ask for $35 an hour reflects boundaries, self‑respect, and realistic acknowledgment of her opportunity costs. She wasn’t asking for extravagance — she offered a rate lower than what her freelancing brings.
Her family’s reaction (anger, dismissal, labeling her “childish,” “entitled,” or “stupid”) may stem less from objective evaluation, more from cultural expectations around family obligations and unpaid labor.
That clash between individual valuation of time and family‑based expectations is common. Research indicates that when people frame time in economic terms, they are more likely to insist on compensation for tasks that are otherwise treated as favors.
In such contexts, saying “no” or “charge for this time” becomes a form of self‑care, a defense against being exploited emotionally or financially.
Still, psychological studies warn there is a trade‑off. When time is constantly evaluated as money, people may feel pressure to monetize every spare moment, potentially reducing enjoyment of leisure or family time.
That can erode relational and emotional benefits that come from purely social or supportive interactions.
In this story, OP made a deliberate, rational decision grounded in her lived reality. Whether others view it as reasonable depends on their values but psychologically, her decision reflects self‑worth and clarity about what her time means to her.
See what others had to share with OP:
This group supports OP, agreeing that setting a fair rate for babysitting three kids was justified
These commenters emphasize that OP was right to set their price based on their professional rate
![[Reddit User] − NTA. She offered to pay you, you named your price, she didn’t like it.](https://dailyhighlight.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/11/wp-editor-1764257663816-28.webp "Cousin Asks For Babysitting Help, Woman Responds With $35 An Hour Fee")
This group agrees that OP’s time is valuable and that the cousin’s request for last-minute babysitting was unreasonable
These commenters back OP’s decision to charge for babysitting but offer different perspectives on how to handle the situation
This commenter finds the cousin’s poor planning and entitlement ridiculous
Was Jenny right to charge her professional hourly rate for babysitting, or did she take things too far? The drama that unfolded shows just how sensitive family dynamics can be when money enters the picture.
Should she have stuck to a simple “no,” or was her request justified given how much her time is worth? Share your thoughts below, would you have handled this differently?
