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Coworker Boasts Jamaican Trip, Clashes With Heritage-Proud Woman, Accuses Her Of “Gatekeeping” Culture

by Jeffrey Stone
December 3, 2025
in Social Issues

A 23-year-old Redditor, glowing from a Jamaican trip and savoring a homemade dish, clashed with a coworker who boasted she was practically Jamaican after a resort vacation. Proud of her roots, the Redditor shut down the claim, sparking a lunchroom spat where a coworker cried “gatekeeping” over her cultural pride.

Reddit’s on fire with takes slicing like a chef’s knife. Some back the Redditor, arguing her coworker’s claim trivialized her heritage, while others think she overreacted, suggesting a lighter touch could’ve diffused the shade. The clash of cultural pride and workplace bravado has everyone debating whether the Redditor defended her roots or let the drama boil over.

A clash over Jamaican culture exposes tensions between authentic pride and touristy claims.

Coworker Boasts Jamaican Trip, Clashes With Heritage-Proud Woman, Accuses Her Of "Gatekeeping" Culture
Not the actual photo.

'AITA for “gatekeeping” my culture and ruining a coworker’s vacation?'

My family (23F) is originally from Jamaica, and I’m very proud of where we come from.

My parents emigrated in the 80s, but they made a point of traveling home several times per year

and maintaining a Jamaican household to keep my siblings and I connected to our culture.

I returned from this year’s vacation this past weekend, and I was telling Coworker A about it during our break because they asked what I was eating (a very popular...

Coworker B overheard that I was talking about Jamaica, and started gushing about going there over Christmas and how “immersed” in the culture she felt.

I asked her where she stayed and what she did, and she said that she stayed in a Sandals resort

and never really left except when she went to swim with dolphins and sail on a catamaran.

I asked her whether she went to Kingston (where I was) and she said that she didn’t because it was just “too unsafe.”

I then asked her if she enjoyed the food and she said that she didn’t have any of the Jamaican dishes “because she didn’t know what they were.”

I didn’t say anything, and just kept a smile plastered on my face, told her that I’m “glad she enjoyed the resort”, and went back to eating my lunch and...

Coworker B then questioned why I wasn’t engaging with her because “she’s been to the country”

and I pointed out that she didn’t interact with locals, eat the food, or leave the Sandals except for tourist experiences so I didn’t feel like we could engage about...

She then got upset with me and accused me of “gatekeeping” my culture and ruining the memory of her vacation.

I felt bad because Coworker A said that I didn’t have to ask her all those questions, but when I told my mom about it, her and my family were...

In this story, coworker B claimed she was “immersed” in Jamaica while lounging at a Sandals resort, dodging local food and Kingston’s vibrant streets.

The Redditor, deeply tied to her heritage, wasn’t buying it. Her questions about food, locals, and adventures weren’t meant to shame but to connect. Instead, they sparked a feud, with B crying “gatekeeping.”

Let’s unpack this. The Redditor’s pride in her culture, nurtured by her family’s frequent trips and traditions, made B’s claims feel shallow.

B, meanwhile, likely felt judged, her vacation glow dimmed by the Redditor’s pointed queries.

Both have valid feelings: the Redditor’s protecting her identity, B’s defending her experience, however touristy. But calling a resort stay “immersion” is like saying you’ve mastered Italian cuisine by eating at Olive Garden.

This tiff highlights a broader issue: cultural tourism versus authentic engagement. A 2019 study by the World Tourism Organization noted that 74% of travelers seek “authentic cultural experiences,” yet many stick to curated resorts.

Resorts offer jobs and economic boosts. Sandals employs thousands in Jamaica, but they often shield visitors from raw, local life. The Redditor’s questions exposed this gap, and B’s defensiveness suggests she knew it.

Dr. Melanie Tervalon and Dr. Jann Murray-García, pioneering physicians who developed the concept of cultural humility, emphasize in their foundational work that it involves “a lifelong commitment to self-evaluation and critique” alongside “the development of mutually beneficial partnerships” through openness to others’ experiences.

This resonates with the Redditor’s approach. She sought a genuine exchange rooted in shared appreciation for Jamaica’s depth, rather than a surface-level chat.

Tervalon and Murray-García’s focus on self-evaluation and partnership highlights how the Redditor’s questions invited reflection, not exclusion, encouraging Coworker B to consider her own lens on the trip.

B’s pushback, including the offhand remark about Kingston’s safety, might stem from unexamined assumptions, underscoring the power dynamics they describe: visitors often hold the narrative, while locals or heritage-holders like the Redditor navigate the fallout of those stories.

In this light, the exchange wasn’t gatekeeping but an invitation to humility, a chance for B to evolve from consumer to collaborator in the conversation. The physicians’ framework, drawn from medical training but broadly applicable, reminds us that true engagement flips the script: it’s about ceding expertise to the “other” and building bridges through curiosity.

For the Redditor, this meant honoring her family’s traditions by probing for real connections; for B, it could mean owning the resort bubble without claiming the full island’s spirit. This dynamic ties into larger patterns in cultural tourism, where humility fosters richer stories over polished postcards.

So, what’s the fix? The Redditor could’ve softened her approach, maybe a “Oh, resorts are fun, but have you tried jerk chicken?” to keep things light. B could’ve owned her touristy trip without claiming expertise. Next time, both might find common ground by sharing stories, not sparring.

Let’s dive into the reactions from Reddit:

Some assert that staying at a resort is not cultural immersion and OP was right to point this out.

CatchMeIfYouCan09 − NTA My husband and I just went to Jamaica last April.

We rented a car and saw 3/4 of the parishes; ate all over the island by asking locals the best places to go; took in a much history as we...

To this day I still cook the half a dozen recipes I brought back with me. I buy all authentic product and have it shipped to me.

Visiting a resort in a foreign country isn't seeing the country.

[Reddit User] − NTA - co-worker B went to an Americanized resort in Jamaica.

"Coworker B overheard that I was talking about Jamaica, and started gushing about going there over Christmas and how “immersed” in the culture she felt."

She never saw the true Jamaica, the people or the food. You ruined nothing, she did when she claimed "immersion".

grrlclimber − NTA. Staying at a Sandals resort is not cultural immersion. It's YOUR culture. R

olling your eyes at someone who has knows nothing about it is not "gatekeeping". It's a perfectly reasonable response to a clueless tourist.

Some argue the coworker’s claim of immersion was exaggerated and OP’s response was justified.

ChaoticCapricorn − NTA. ..Um why she lie? She didn't immerse herself in anything. She just wanted to humble brag and got Uno reversed instead.

Additionally, she clearly doesn't understand what gatekeeping actually entails. You can't keep her out of something she never tried to get in to.

Artistic_Chapter_355 − NTA. She was upset because she knew you were correct - she didn’t interact with the culture in a deep way.

Big_Falcon89 − NTA, easy. Just setting foot in a country doesn't mean you've visited it.

I technically set foot in China during a flight layover. Do I say "Yeah, I've been to China"? Heck no.

"Gatekeeping" is a real thing, but saying that someone who visited a resort doesn't know what a country is like ain't it.

Others believe OP was polite and not gatekeeping, as the coworker misunderstood cultural engagement.

LurkerByNatureGT − NTA. “Glad you enjoyed the resort” and dropping the subject is a very reasonable response

to someone butting in your conversation with someone else and telling you they thought your family home place was too unsafe to visit.

The rest was simply giving honest answers when she was pushy.

thedrunknerd − NTA. You had a polite conversation with your co-worker and she pushed you further.

You weren't gatekeeping anything, you were asking if she enjoyed your culture which she rejected when she visited the country.

KaiKolo − That's not gatekeeping, that's opening the gate for someone to enter but they refuse to come in.

Some acknowledge that not all travelers seek immersion, but claiming it without effort is misleading.

olliedog1414 − Not everyone wants to immerse themselves in the food and culture of a place they visit.

Sometimes we just want to get away from the cold for a week. That’s fine.

Presumably the country benefits from having visitors or, at least the benefits such as jobs outweigh the issues visitors might cause?

That being said, we wouldn’t assume for a second that we have seen the country or understand the lives of the residents. NTA

This lunchroom drama shows how fast pride and misunderstanding can turn a chat into a showdown. The Redditor’s love for her Jamaican roots clashed with a coworker’s rosy resort tale, leaving both feeling bruised.

Was the Redditor right to call out the “immersion” fib, or did her questions hit too hard? Would you have kept the peace or defended your culture’s authenticity? Drop your hot takes below and let’s keep this convo as lively as a Kingston street market!

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone is a valuable freelance writer at DAILY HIGHLIGHT. As a senior entertainment and news writer, Jeffrey brings a wealth of expertise in the field, specifically focusing on the entertainment industry.

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