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Dad’s Out Of Town, 15-Year-Old Refuses To Stay With Affair Partner, Court Backs Yet She Fusses

by Jeffrey Stone
December 3, 2025
in Social Issues

A 15-year-old resists stepmom’s forced “family time” while Dad’s away, backed by a court order, stirring heated custody clashes. Reddit’s AITA splits: is the teen’s stance fair or a family snub?

With Dad on a two-month work trip, the teen dodges stepmom’s push for bonding with her kids, citing his legal choice. Stepmom’s insistence fuels a fiery feud, escalating tensions. The saga probes custody rules versus forced family ties, with users divided on whether the teen’s rebellion is justified or a cold shoulder to blended family hopes.

Teen’s refusal to visit his stepmom during his dad’s absence stirs family tension, backed by a court order.

Dad's Out Of Town, 15-Year-Old Refuses To Stay With Affair Partner, Court Backs Yet She Fusses
Not the actual photo.

'AITA for refusing to go to my dad's house when he's not there?'

My dad is leaving town in a week or maybe like a week and a half. I forget when.

He'll be out of town for about 2 months. Not sure why exactly but something to do with work.

My parents custody order says if mom or dad isn't around for more than 4 hours,

I (15m) go to the other parent and if one of them is going out of town without me,

they need to give the other the option to keep me for that period of time. So with my dad going I'll be staying with my mom.

My dad's wife isn't happy about this and neither is my dad. He's married but not to my mom. He has three kids with his wife under 6.

They want me to go at least on weekends to see his wife and their kids. But they argued for me to keep 50/50.

I don't even want to be there when my dad's there. I'm not close to my dad. I really hate his wife. I don't respect her or accept her into...

Reasons I feel this way in general are she's dad's affair partner or whatever it's called.

She tried to get me to call her mom in another language because she doesn't like me calling her by her first name (so I just say Ms Last Name)

and wanted the respect of a parent name, they talk s__t about my mom despite having the affair,

they accuse my mom of turning me against them despite my dad taking me to his wife's house when they were having the affair

and I saw them together and my dad and his wife tried to move out of state with me so "we could be a family".

I had to speak to the judge when that happened. It was s__tty. So I'm only dealing with the custody crap until I turn 17

(because then my voice will be listened to by a judge and not before them, we have checked with lawyers already).

My dad told me to think of the kids and how they'll miss me. I told him it will help them get used to me not being around

because when I turn 17 I won't be anymore. He told me my feelings will change in two years and to embrace my time with them.

His wife said I'm a part of their family and should want to spend time with my other mom and my only siblings. I rolled my eyes at her.

She called me disrespectful. She told me to stop being so stubborn and I said no.

I said she can't make me go to the house when dad isn't around and they know they can't get a court to force it so accept that they won't...

My dad and his wife both think I'm an ass for it and they keep saying how much they dislike my decision. AITA?

This Redditor’s situation – refusing to visit his dad’s house during a two-month work absence – screams family tension with a side of legal savvy.

The teen’s dad is jetting off for work, leaving his wife and three kids under 6 behind.

The custody order is clear: if a parent’s gone for over four hours, the teen stays with the other parent, in this case, Mom. But Dad and his wife are pushing for weekend visits, claiming it’s about sibling bonding. The Redditor? Not having it.

The teen’s got a laundry list of grievances. His stepmom, once his dad’s affair partner, has a history of badmouthing his mom and even tried to whisk him out of state for a “new family” vibe.

Add to that her push to be called “Mom” in another language, and it’s no wonder the teen’s rolling his eyes hard enough to strain a muscle. From his perspective, it’s about dodging a stepmom he distrusts and avoiding babysitting duties for her kids.

Meanwhile, Dad and Stepmom argue he’s part of their family and should embrace his “only siblings.” The guilt trips are flying, but the teen’s standing his ground, citing the court order’s “right of first refusal” clause.

This drama taps into a broader issue: navigating blended families when trust is shakier than a Jenga tower. According to a 2023 study from the American Psychological Association, 60% of teens in blended families report tension with stepparents, often tied to loyalty conflicts or past betrayals). Here, the affair’s shadow looms large, fueling the teen’s resentment.

Dr. Patricia Papernow, a stepfamily expert, notes in a Psychology Today article, “My advice to stepparents is to concentrate on connection before correction.”

This stepmom’s push for a parental title and her criticism of the teen’s mom aren’t helping her case. They’re like pouring salt on an open wound.

Papernow’s guidance underscores the need for patience and empathy in building bonds, especially when history has already frayed the edges.

Rushing into authority without that foundation? It’s like trying to high-five someone who’s got their arms crossed, awkward and counterproductive. Instead, focusing on genuine, low-pressure interactions could pave the way for smoother sailing down the line.

So, what’s the move? The teen’s legally in the clear, and emotionally, he’s protecting his peace. A neutral approach might be setting boundaries while keeping the door cracked for future sibling connection, maybe short, supervised visits on his terms. But forcing “family time” when trust is nonexistent? That’s a recipe for more eye-rolls.

Here’s how people reacted to the post:

Some affirm OP’s right to refuse visitation when their dad is absent, citing the court order.

Less_Ordinary_8516 − NTA. It's court ordered so you don't have to be there.

They can't force you, so you are off the hook. Block them for the time he's gone and relax and enjoy your time at moms uninterrupted!

1962Michael − NTA. The custody order is the way it is for a reason. You are supposed to be at your dad's to spend time with your dad

. If he is gone, there is no reason for you to be there, and you should be with the other parent if they are available.

Step-parents have no "rights" to your time, and I say this as a parent and step-parent...

Floating-Cynic − This literally isn't up to you. It's in the court order.

It's incredibly inappropriate that they're trying to manipulate you in order to circumvent that order.

NTA, but stop arguing. The clause you're mentioning is the "right of first refusal."

It was built into your custody schedule for a reason. "I'm saying no, take it up with mom."

Others suspect the stepmom’s motives, suggesting she wants OP as a babysitter.

Hungry-Industry-9817 − NTA, sounds like she just wants a free babysitter under the guise of “family time”.

[Reddit User] − NTA. The court says you don’t have to go, you don’t like your stepmom,

and odds are, she wants you there to help with the kids while she’s home alone. All of those are good reasons not to go, in my opinion.

Artistic_Tough5005 − INFO: Do they have you watch the kids while you are there?

Some highlight the stepmom’s lack of authority and validate OP’s feelings.

Number5MoMo − NTA. Seems like there’s nothing they can do but try to guilt/manipulate you. Just ignore them.

I completely understand why you need to do what you’re gonna do when you’re 17. They won’t get it because they have been selfish from the beginning.

Ratchet_gurl24 − OP to dad’s wife…. ”You seem to be placing yourself in high regards, claiming a position in my life that is not yours for the taking”.

Holiday_Ad8142 − I’m you 27 years later. You will not change your mind about your siblings.

This Redditor’s standing at a family crossroads, armed with a court order and a hefty dose of teenage resolve. His refusal to play happy family with a stepmom he distrusts has Reddit cheering, but it leaves us wondering: Is he right to dig in his heels, or could a smidge of compromise keep the peace without selling out his principles?

How would you navigate this messy blend of loyalty, legalities, and family drama? Share your hot takes!

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone is a valuable freelance writer at DAILY HIGHLIGHT. As a senior entertainment and news writer, Jarvis brings a wealth of expertise in the field, specifically focusing on the entertainment industry.

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