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Heir Declines To Inherit Debt-Ridden House, Lets The Bank Evict All Relatives Living With Him

by Jeffrey Stone
December 2, 2025
in Social Issues

A family mansion inheritance turned money pit nightmare, complete with surprise squatters treating it like their personal crash pad. One Redditor wisely declined the “gift” – a mortgage bomb laced with emotional blackmail, after years of low-contact with relatives.

Guilt-trip calls flooded in, testing financial sanity against squandered privilege. Reddit’s debating this savvy sidestep: disaster dodged or cold shoulder to family ties in crisis?

Heir declines to inherit a house, contributes to evicting relatives to the streets.

Heir Declines To Inherit Debt-Ridden House, Lets The Bank Evict All Relatives Living With Him
Not the actual photo.

'AITAH for Declining to Inherit a House?'

I feel like I'm going crazy, so tossing this family drama to the internet for judgment. It has some backstory, so bear with me.

My grandparents passed away a couple years apart a little over a decade ago and left the vast majority of their estate to my father.

My Aunts supposedly didn't get much. My grandparents had been quite wealthy in an inherited it way,

and didn't have a lot left after they passed other than the house and some cars.

This was a shock as they acted wealthy and spread money around in a controlling way that made me go very low contact with the lot of them.

I'm pretty out of the loop.

Not everybody in the family has done well for themselves in spite of their generous start with paid for schooling and free-flowing parental money.

One of my Aunts and two Cousins never moved out of the family home, don't have jobs, and sponged off relatives their whole lives.

When my father inherited the house, he let them stay and moved in with them (it timed to when he divorced my mother).

They're still there. My father has recently passed leaving everything to me (only child). Aunt and Cousins lawyered up and are refusing to leave.

As the house is older and hasn't been maintained much in the last 15 years or so, I have zero interest in a white elephant filled with squatters.

If they have any right to the house or not given how long they lived there and claimed to be caring for my grandparents/father is super confusing.

They never lifted a finger for my grandparents, nor for my father, as far as I know.

It was also heavily mortgaged by my father in the intervening years to cover expenses, and that would be my problem if I wanted to keep it.

The estate is basically close to worth zero or somewhat in the hole. The only way to keep the house is to take over the very large mortgage dad racked...

I told the lawyers that I want no part in any of this and will not be accepting the house

or anything else from his estate except some sentimental items (photos and holiday ornament type things I made as a kid).

This is causing the estate to have to liquidate the assets and evict my Aunt and two Cousins to settle things up.

They claim to have nowhere to go. Now my phone is being blown up by everybody and sundry telling me I'm cruel and unusual to put them on the streets.

This was not sudden. My father was ill for some time. They did absolutely nothing to prepare for this and assumed they could stay in the house.

They claim my father said they could stay in exchange for caring for him and the grandparents.

I have no idea what promises were or weren't made given the very low contact.

As far as I know, nobody still living is mentally or physically disabled. They genuinely don't have resources or anywhere to go,

but there's certainly plenty they could have done in the last decade to deal with that.

I feel terrible, but really don't want to take on a debt-ridden house and three grown adults.

Am I the a__hole for letting the bank evict them and sell the house?

Handing down a family home should feel like passing the baton in a relay race, not dodging a flaming wrecking ball.

Yet here we are, with our Redditor staring down a dilapidated house loaded with debt, uninvited long-term guests, and zero upside.

By politely passing on the inheritance, they’ve triggered a liquidation that means eviction for an aunt and two cousins who’ve called the place home for decades without chipping in a dime.

At the heart of it, the OP’s dad inherited the property over a decade ago from wealthy grandparents, let the relatives freeload while he racked up a massive mortgage to cover their lifestyle, and then left it all to his only child.

These folks, despite being fully functional adults, never worked, never saved, and banked on endless generosity despite ample warning time (dad’s illness wasn’t a secret).

OP’s low-contact status means they’re out of the loop on any “promises” of lifelong tenancy. But legally, heirs aren’t obligated to become landlords or debt collectors. The relatives have enjoyed rent-free living for years, yet now cry foul when the free ride ends.

Flip the script, though, and you see the relatives’ panic. They truly have nowhere else, having burned bridges with jobs and savings.

This highlights America’s sticky family dynamics around inheritance: a 2023 Federal Reserve study found 60% of U.S. households expect to receive an inheritance, but many grapple with “toxic” assets like burdened properties.

Experts warn against emotional overrides. Family therapist Terry Gaspard notes in Psychology Today, “Boundaries aren’t selfishness; they’re self-preservation. You can’t pour from an empty cup, especially when others have had decades to fill theirs”.

OP did the smart, solvent thing, letting the estate handle the mess via lawyers and bank foreclosure if needed.

For the relatives, local resources like subsidized housing waitlists or job training programs exist. Families could rally with a GoFundMe for moving costs, but expecting one person to saddle lifelong debt? Who would?

Here’s what people had to say to OP:

Some people mock the aunts/cousins’ hypocrisy in refusing to take financial responsibility.

Electronic_Fox_6383 − They're free to buy the house themselves with all the money they've saved on rent for the last decade, lol.

NTA though. This isn't your mess to clean up. Sorry about your dad.

DaveWpgC − Ha ha ha, that's awesome. First it was "I'm not leaving your house, you can't make me".

Now it's "you're an a__hole for not taking this house & debt and continuing to let me live here rent free". They FA&FO.

Helpful_Hour1984 − This is perfect malicious compliance:

"We're not leaving, you can't make me!"

"Ok, I'll pass on the inheritance, the house is all yours."

"Wait, what? How can you be so cruel? Waaahh!"

butterfly-garden − NTA. Not your circus, not your monkeys.

The comment section asserts the inheritance is a financial trap, not a benefit, and OP rightfully declined.

[Reddit User] − NTA. The Classic: If they care so much, why don't they pay for the mortgage or house them?

Truth is, they don't and your the scapegoat ready for slaughter.

SushiGuacDNA − NTA. What a mess. I'm sorry. This doesn't sound like an "inheritance".

It sounds like an attempt to hand you an enormous debt, both emotional and financial.

WornBlueCarpet − NTA If the owner of the house was your father, and you decline the inheritance, wouldn't his heir be the next in line - his sisters?

Why don't they just accept the inheritance? Oh yeah, because it's a f__king bottomless pit to pour money in.

Users defend OP’s decision as following the father’s actual wishes and avoiding burden.

jacksonlove3 − NTA! If your dad wanted your aunts/cousins to have the house he would've of left it to them specifically; but he didn't.

I wouldn't want the hassle and financial burden of taking over the house either considering the circumstances & costs.

They knew they should've had a plan but they didn't, that's their problem not yours.

redmayapril − All you need to say is that you're sorry he promised they could stay,

he did not have permission to promise that you would house them at your expense.

And that you will not be taking on a mortgage for a house for them to live in.

If you passed on the estate it should have gone to your aunt as his closest relative.

You in effect "gave" it to her but it's worth nothing. You aren't evicting them. You just aren't paying for them to continue living there.

A user recommends deflecting criticism by offering critics responsibility for the house.

SnooWords4839 − NTA - It was your best move; the estate lawyer needs to deal with it, and you can walk away.

Anyone giving you crap about it, respond with - Great, I will let aunt and cousins know you are going to help them.

Are these takes pure wisdom or just internet armchair lawyering?

In the end, our Redditor chose peace over a poisoned chalice, proving sometimes the best inheritance is walking away debt-free.

But with tears and tantrums flying, was declining the house a fair flex of self-protection, or did it leave kin in the lurch after years of complacency?

How would you handle being the accidental landlord in this generational game of hot potato? Drop your unfiltered thoughts, we’re all ears!

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone

Jeffrey Stone is a valuable freelance writer at DAILY HIGHLIGHT. As a senior entertainment and news writer, Jarvis brings a wealth of expertise in the field, specifically focusing on the entertainment industry.

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