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Man Refuses To Let Ex-Girlfriend’s Wedding Happen At His House After Being Uninvited

by Leona Pham
November 26, 2025
in Social Issues

Weddings can be a time for celebration, but they can also bring unexpected drama when past relationships resurface. One man recently found himself in an awkward situation after his best friend Carla asked to hold her wedding at his house.

Carla and the man had dated years ago, but when her fiancé Rick found out about their past, he became upset. Rick requested that the man not attend the wedding, but still expected to hold the ceremony at his house.

Now, feeling uncomfortable with the whole situation, the man is refusing to allow the wedding at his property, questioning why he should be asked to vacate his own home for an event that he’s no longer welcome at. Was his refusal justified, or is he being petty in the face of a difficult situation? Scroll down to see how this family drama plays out.

A man denies his best friend’s wedding request on his property after being uninvited by the groom

Man Refuses To Let Ex-Girlfriend’s Wedding Happen At His House After Being Uninvited
not the actual photo

'AITA for not letting my best friend have her wedding on my property after being uninvited?'

One of my (29M) best friends “Carla” (31f) is getting married soon. It’s only meant to be a small backyard type of wedding

but they’ve been planning it for a few months now and originally it was supposed to be on my property.

They wanted it because it’s private, has lots of open space for the reception, a nice view and the house could be used for them to get ready and stuff.

Of course I said yes, she and her fiancé “Rick” were very happy.

Thing is Carla and I do have a history. We went out on & off in college but decided to stay friends.

Then I met my wife, we got married, Carla met Rick and now here they are.

Now my wife knows I went out with Carla back in college and she didn’t care. Carla still went to our wedding and everything.

I never knew if Rick was told or not, it’s not my relationship therefore not my business to say anything so I never did.

Rick found out recently and not in the best way.

Not sure how but from what I heard from friends is that one mutual friend told him (no idea why) we used to date.

Not only that but apparently Carla said a couple years ago she was still in love with me when she was already dating Rick.

Don’t have actual confirmation if that’s exactly what he was told.

All Carla’s told me is that Rick was told about our past and he’s angry at her for never saying anything.

It became quite a drama and didnt hear from her for over a month until now.

She told me they’re going to couples counseling and that the wedding is still on. But Rick requested that I not attend.

It sucks but I totally get why he wouldn’t be comfortable. Then I asked the obvious question, where are they going to hold the wedding then?

To my surprise she said they still want it at our place.

Rick said so to and in my mind I’m going “he doesn’t want the guy who dated his fiancée years ago at the wedding,

but still wants the wedding at his house.” My wife and I are expected to just...not be at our home that weekend, and I told Carla no.

They’re going to have to find some place else since we’re not going to simply leave our home to them for the weekend.

Not only for safety reasons but it just doesn’t make sense.

Rick doesn’t want me around because he’s not comfortable but is comfortable enough to have their wedding at my house?

They really want their wedding here though and because of that I’ve been bugged by not only her

but also Rick and some friends who think I’m being a petty a__hole for not letting them have the wedding here anymore.

Honestly don’t think that I am, it just doesn’t make sense at all to have to leave our own place

for a wedding we’re no longer welcome to and leaving our home totally vulnerable.

Still, being accused of sabotaging their wedding and Rick believes it’s the least I can do after everything. AITA?

In this situation, the OP is caught in a difficult position, trying to balance fairness, family dynamics, and personal boundaries. The request to host a wedding at his home, after being uninvited, understandably felt like an unfair demand.

The OP’s decision to refuse stems not from malice but from a need to protect his space, his family’s privacy, and his emotional well-being. When someone has already been excluded from a significant event, it’s natural to feel resentment when they are then asked to offer up something as personal and private as their home.

Psychologists emphasize that when individuals perceive unfair treatment, particularly in personal or familial settings, it often triggers feelings of anger, frustration, and resentment. The OP’s decision to say no aligns with a psychological need to restore fairness.

One expert, Dr. David R. Hamilton, highlights that “the human brain is wired to fight for fairness,” and when someone is placed in a position where they feel they are being asked to sacrifice their personal comfort without reciprocity, they are likely to resist.

Furthermore, experts in relationship dynamics emphasize that setting boundaries is essential for maintaining personal integrity and emotional health.

Dr. John Gottman, a leading researcher in relationship studies, explains that “healthy boundaries are crucial for emotional well-being” and that they help prevent feelings of resentment and emotional burnout.

When the OP is asked to vacate his own home for the wedding of a person who has already made it clear they don’t want him involved, it becomes clear that his decision to say no is not petty but an act of self-respect and self-preservation.

The request from Carla and Rick, to have their wedding at the OP’s home while excluding him from the event, creates an emotionally charged imbalance. The OP’s refusal to comply is understandable, given that it asks him to sacrifice comfort and fairness for an event he has been excluded from, a contradiction that naturally leads to resentment.

In conclusion, the OP’s actions are not a reflection of pettiness but of healthy boundary-setting. His refusal to allow the wedding to be held at his home is a reasonable and justified response to the emotional and relational imbalance presented.

The OP is not required to be a passive participant in his own discomfort for the sake of others, and his refusal to host the wedding is a reflection of his need for fairness, respect, and personal boundaries.

Here’s the input from the Reddit crowd:

This group agreed that Rick is being manipulative and unreasonable, using guilt to try to get what he wants

pomme_dor − Rick doesn't want to get married anymore but doesn't want to be the bad guy breaking up with his fiancee,

so he's put her in an impossible position so he can get the sympathy when they split. NTA.

WonderfulAtmosphere − NTA- what a weird request. Do you typically host wedding receptions on your property?

He can go pay for a venue if he’s going to act like that... if they even end up getting married.

DelightfulAbsurdity − NTA, if he is uncomfortable by your presence, he is welcome to shell out a deposit on short notice for another venue.

No way in hell would I allow myself to be run off my own property by an insecure man to use as he sees fit, even just for a day.

Malicious destruction on top of typical wedding party mess? No, thank you.

OkapiEli − So RIck thinks this is the least you can do after “everything” … meaning, after you had her first??!

Omg, I wish her luck with that one. NTA. I don’t think there should be a wedding at all, and since your question is about the location, Nope, not at...

These Redditors emphasized the absurdity of Rick and Carla expecting the OP to provide their property for the wedding after uninviting them

snootnoots − Holy cow, NTA. “Rick believes it’s the least I can do after everything."

After what? After he found out his fiancée said she still had feelings for you?

After he got mad at his fiancée for hiding details from her past, because she knew he wouldn’t like them?

After you… broke up amicably with her long before they got together, moved on,

got married to a different woman, and were going to do them a huge favour? ! The things he’s mad about are all things Carla did.

He’s displacing his anger onto you as a “safe” target, because he doesn’t want to break up with her

and doesn’t know how to work through anger and trust issues in a healthy way, therefore it has to be your fault… somehow.

Hopefully their couples therapist will work out what’s going on and help him get through it to a healthier mindset,

but that’s not your problem, and neither is the question of where they’re going to hold the wedding now that Rick’s completely torpedoed the original plan.

nathashanails − NTA. It’s absolutely ridiculous that they not only uninvited you,

but that they still expect you to let them have the wedding on your property.

How can they honestly expect to just kick you out of your own home for a weekend? Are they even paying you to let them have their wedding at your...

[Reddit User] − NTA They are not entitled to your property. You were doing them a favor.

These commenters noted that Rick’s jealousy and insecurity are a major issue

Status_Percentage − NTA. Rick is being delusional and seems to have insecurity and jealousy issues.

If this is how he is, I don't see the marriage lasting long.

Knitsanity − NTA. I am astounded that anyone would think otherwise

This would probably also do well on r/choosingbeggars. No way should you allow your property to be used. Lol.

stormyllewellynn − Lmao are you serious the level of entitlement here is atrocious.

No, there is absolutely no way they should be having their wedding at your house after that.

And if Carla is for it, then that’s not your friend. NTA. Also. Rick thinks it’s the least you can do after everything?

What? Going out with your friend before you had any idea of his existence?

My god. Just rolled my eyes so hard, they got stuck. Brb.

This group pointed out that Rick’s anger and Carla’s poor decisions are at the heart of the problem

[Reddit User] − Nta So you're not invited because you had history, but they're fine enough to still take advantage of YOUR home?

The audacity. Don't be surprised if they get drunk and start trashing your home. They're just cheapskates.

kgrimmburn − and Rick believes it’s the least I can do after everything After everything? What was everything?

Dated his fiance years before he knew her? Or was everything him being an immature, jealous AH?

This is on him. And he probably doesn't like that but everything is his fault. NTA.

[Reddit User] − Carla is a SPINELESS and GREEDY person. She demands her wedding to supersede everything,

including her childish, selfish decisions (and cover-ups).

Now she's whining about when her pathetic choices start to blow up in her face. Her fiance matches her personality. NTA.

spinly_jaye − You know who was doing the sabotaging?

That random friend that casually mentioned to Rick that y’all dated and tacked on the she’s still in love with you bit.

That person is a toxic s__t disturber. NTA for refusing them the venue, but if they still really want it make them pay venue prices for its use.

Don’t give them your house tho, yard only.

They can get ready off site. Or in a tent. Who cares, s__ew them!

Was OP right to draw the line at hosting the wedding, or could there have been a more diplomatic solution? Share your thoughts below!

Leona Pham

Leona Pham

Hi, I'm Leona. I'm a writer for Daily Highlight and have had my work published in a variety of other media outlets. I'm also a New York-based author, and am always interested in new opportunities to share my work with the world. When I'm not writing, I enjoy spending time with my family and friends. Thanks for reading!

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