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Mother Kicks Her 38-Year-Old Son, His Girlfriend & Grandson Out After Year of Free Stay

by Charles Butler
November 19, 2025
in Social Issues

A family home turned into a catch-22 of compassion and chaos.

A retired couple opened their door to their 38-year-old son, his pregnant girlfriend, and the newborn grandson. They offered support: housing, utilities, diapers but expected responsibility in return. Seven months of eviction troubles, credit-card debt, part-time “DoorDash” hustles, zero groceries bought, and nearly a year of living rent-free later, the parents were done.

They sold the house, gave a two-month eviction notice, and asked the trio to leave.

Now the son says they’ll never see the baby again. The parents wonder where they slipped up.

Now, read the full story:

Mother Kicks Her 38-Year-Old Son, His Girlfriend & Grandson Out After Year of Free Stay
Not the actual photo‘AITA for kicking my son, his gf and my grandson out of my house?’

I(63F) and my husband(67M) ran into an issue with my son last year. During the pandemic his gf got pregnant. He moved her in with his roommates who were not...

The roommates left and they resigned with the landlord just themselves but his gf couldn’t/wouldn’t find a job and he lost his job a few months later and couldn’t pay...

They stayed for 7 months and then got evicted.

Now they have an eviction on their record and terrible credit because they lived off of credit card so they have thousands in credit card debt.

I didn’t want them moving in, my son(38M) lived at home until he was 31 so we had a lot of trouble getting him to move out. But his gf...

They stayed for almost a year and the deal was, they both get jobs, they help pay utilities and pay off their credit cards and find a place to live.

They were only suppose to stay for 6 months but they wouldn’t move out when we asked at the end of 6 months.

They said because of the eviction on their record no one would rent to them. They also didn’t make enough to pay utilities.

So my husband and I paid more in utilities and they ate for free as well since they would take from the fridge and wouldn’t buy any groceries themselves.

We offered to help them with baby expenses (diapers, car seat etc) at first but it’s been almost a year and we are still paying for it.

They were doing door dash but not working more than 3-4h a day.

I kept trying to get my son to get a full time job but he just got angry and accused me of nagging him.

His gf also is very messy and doesn’t clean up after herself.

I’ve changed more diapers and fed her son more than she has and it’s infuriating because they chose to have a child but won’t take responsibility.

My husband and I have been retired for 2 years now and we had planned to move to Chile where I am from.

We were suppose to sell the house last year and didn’t just to let them stay but it’s now been over a year and we were sick of it.

We kept telling them they had to move out and they just ignored us so we put our house up for sale.

We had wanted to renovate it first but they wouldn’t let us into their bathroom and room so we decided just to sell as is.

We got a fair offer and closed in a week ended and told them they had 2 months to move. My son yelled at us for kicking them out and...

They finally moved out and we are in between places and will be going to Chile next month. But my son and his gf currently have nowhere to live.

They are staying with a friend now but they are only letting them stay until the end of the month and then they will have to figure it out.

My son yells at me over the phone and tells me I’m never allowed to see my grandson again for kicking us out.

I don’t know where I went wrong that he couldn’t be an adult and get a job and move out without being forced.

Reading this felt like watching a slow-motion collapse of goodwill. The parents opened their home believing in a deal: you live here temporarily, you contribute, you move on to independence. But when the contributions vanished, so did the deal’s integrity.

Their frustration is completely understandable. They’ve delayed their retirement, supported multiple people who refused to pull their weight, and now face a disrupted plan to move to Chile.

At the same time, the son and girlfriend are in an emergency spiral – eviction, debt, newborn – and there is real hardship. That doesn’t erase the fact that the household dynamic became unfair and unsustainable.

Now we hit the heart of the matter: what happens when adult children refuse to grow up, and parents feel forced into eviction to save their own lives? Let’s dive into what experts say about this scenario.

When adult children live in their parents’ home without fulfilling agreed roles, the result often feels less like support and more like stroller behind the wheel. The arrangement may begin with good intentions, then slide into entitlement and resentment.

Living with adult children is increasingly common in recent decades. In the U.S., 18 % of adults ages 25-34 lived in a parent’s home in 2023 and men (20 %) did so more than women (15 %).

That shows the idea of “boomerang kids” is real. But frequency doesn’t equal smoothness, co-residence raises questions of roles, finances, and boundaries.

In an article about adult children re-living at home, Kim Abraham and Marney Studaker-Cordner observed:

“An adult child can actually make a career out of earning income from his parents by working the emotional system.” 
That line hits hard in this story. The son and girlfriend had a child, moved in, and the parents carried the load. The parenting of the next generation was handled mostly by grandparents. That dynamic drains relationships.

Another expert, Dr. Jack Stoltzfus, wrote:

“Parents should not ‘kick their young adult out’ … instead support their desire for independence and help them find housing”, and he warns that forced eviction often leads to estrangement. 
He doesn’t argue against setting boundaries but he does focus on communication, mutual agreements, and preventing the relationship from breaking permanently.

What This Story Illustrates

Here we see a breach in two parts: the adult children repeatedly broke the deal (jobs, utilities, cleaning) and the grandparents internalized the burden past the acceptable threshold.
Support turned into subsidy. Care turned into caretaking. The parents’ retirement dreams were sidelined. Their home became a rental they never authorized.

Financially, the toll is significant. A growing number of parents report that supporting adult children hurts their savings. For example, a report noted that nearly half of U.S. parents say financial support to adult children affected their retirement readiness. 
The parents in this case weren’t just giving money, they were offering housing, utilities, childcare. That amplifies the strain.

Advice Based on Expert Guidance

1. Formalize the Agreement.
As the EmpoweringParents article suggests, set clear terms when adult children move in: contributions, time limit, chores, and consequences. In this case the terms were verbal (“six months”), but enforcement lagged. Making it formal, even in email, can reduce ambiguity.

2. Communicate Consequences Ahead of Time.
Define what happens if contributions don’t occur. The grandparents arranged the sale and eviction notice, they followed through, which prevents endless enabling. Experts emphasize that follow-through is key to maintaining boundaries.

3. Preserve the Relationship While Protecting Yourself.
Dr. Stoltzfus warns that abrupt expulsion harms connections permanently. In practice that means having a conversation with the adult children: “This isn’t working. Here’s the timeline. Here’s what success looks like. Here’s where we go if you don’t comply.” That preserves dignity for both sides.

4. Protect Your Own Financial Security.
If you are retired or planning to retire, as the grandparents are, you must guard your path. The “sandwich generation” research shows that supporting children and grandchildren can jeopardize retirement. Even with love, you cannot ignore your needs forever.

The tension here isn’t simply about kicking someone out. It’s about balancing love and limits. The grandparents honoured a promise, then honoured themselves. The adult children entered expecting support without accountability, and now face consequences. The key message: helping doesn’t mean losing your own life. Emerging adults need to launch; parents need to reclaim.

Check out how the community responded:

Some Redditors sided with the grandparents and declared the son’s behavior entitlement on full display.

poeadam - NTA He’s 38. . . You were way more patient than you could have been.

EntrepreneurNo1525 - OP, you are NTA. Your son and his gf did this to themselves.

SpilledInk2022 - NTA. Your son is 38 and needs to step up and be a [bad guy] adult.

mizfit0416 - NTA - He’s a grown a** man and it’s time for him to grow up and take care of his kid.

Ok_Register3005 - NTA. They were talking advantage of you. You did the right thing.

Others focused on the baby and worried the grandson will become collateral damage.

coastalkid92 - NTA. But perhaps set up a trust for that kid for when he comes of age because it sounds like he may need it.

Huge_Put8244 - You may have gone wrong nowhere at all. … I do worry for the kid and I think you should call CPS. … This baby is a baby...

Calm_Inky − NTA - They had 8 months to figure things out. I feel bad for their baby, but at 38 he should be old enough to be on his...

A few pointed out the relationship risk and emotional fallout from the eviction threat and blame game.

PhilosophySalt5766 - I never understood why kids felt that blackmailing/ threatening their parents with grandchild visitation was a real threat.

Aren’t parents the ones that benefit the most from free babysitting? NTA. [Reddit User] - There’s not a chance I’m going to a meeting at 7pm … That’s a terrible...

(We only include the ten given comments, so this theme group has fewer than five.)

This story shows that love sometimes gives way to limits and that’s okay. The grandparents offered a home, support, and a timeline. The adult children accepted, then sidestepped their part. The parents turned that into action: the sale of the home and the eviction notice.

It’s not about kicking someone out. It’s about reclaiming your life while hoping they’ll stand up instead of leaning on you. The hardest part will be the silence from the son, the father-figure who says you’ll never see your grandson again. Whether that’s guilt or grief is for time to decide.

What about you? Would you have drawn the line sooner or waited longer? And if you were the son, how much responsibility would you expect yourself to take before staying in your parents’ home?

Charles Butler

Charles Butler

Hey there, fellow spotlight seekers! As the PIC of our social issues beat—and a guy who's dived headfirst into journalism and media studies—I'm obsessed with unpacking how we chase thrills, swap stories, and tangle with the big, messy debates of inequality, justice, and resilience, whether on screens or over drinks in a dive bar. Life's an endless, twisty reel, so I love spotlighting its rawest edges in words. Growing up on early internet forums and endless news scrolls, I'm forever blending my inner fact-hoarder with the restless wanderer itching to uncover every hidden corner of the world.

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