Newcomers Ignore Mutual Holiday Help Deal And Get A Taste Of Their Own Medicine During Christmas

A longtime employee upheld a fair team pact by covering duties during major holidays so colleagues could enjoy family time, receiving reciprocal support for their own religious observances in return. The arrangement ran smoothly for years in their small group until retirements brought in newcomers.

Tensions built as explanations about shared effort fell on deaf ears, yet the original team members stepped up anyway. When Christmas neared and longtime colleagues planned time off, the veteran offered to shoulder the extra load alone, only for the newcomers to overhear and expect the same courtesy they had withheld three times before.

A long-standing mutual holiday coverage agreement fell apart when new employees refused to participate.

The original setup was genuinely equitable: a mutual exchange that let everyone enjoy meaningful time off without burning out the office. The OP generously shouldered heavier loads during Christian-majority holidays, recognizing cultural differences and prioritizing team harmony. When newcomers opted out of their end of the bargain, they broke the implicit social contract of give-and-take that kept things running smoothly.

From the other side, the new coworkers might genuinely feel the imbalance. After all, even light remote work during their holidays could feel like an intrusion compared to full disconnection.

But their “it’s not fair” stance ignores the math: covering one person’s absence is manageable for a group, as one person soloing multiple is a recipe for exhaustion. Their Christmas entitlement argument overlooks that holidays hold equal weight across faiths. What’s sacred for one isn’t lesser for another.

This ties into broader workplace dynamics around religious and cultural accommodations. According to a 2022 study published in Socius, nearly a third (27%) of American workers reported perceiving religious discrimination at some point in their career, with minority religions like Muslims facing disproportionately higher rates, accounting for 23.3% of EEOC religion-related complaints in 2017 despite being only about 1% of the population.

This highlights how majority norms can overshadow minority needs, leading to resistance against accommodations for non-mainstream holidays or practices. In diverse teams, informal arrangements like this one can bridge gaps, but only when everyone buys in.

Tech leader and philanthropist Bill Gates has noted that “The competition to hire the best will increase in the years ahead. Companies that give extra flexibility to their employees will have the edge in this area.” Here, the original deal embodied that shared responsibility. Ditching one side undermines trust and morale.

Neutral advice? Teams benefit from formalizing such swaps to avoid “he said/she said” drama. Open dialogue about cultural respect and workload equity could rebuild bridges, maybe negotiate extra pay or comp time for holiday coverage.

Ultimately, reciprocity isn’t optional in tight-knit teams; it’s what keeps everyone from burning out.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

Some people strongly support the OP as NTA, viewing the coworkers’ refusal to reciprocate as breaking the deal first.

Some people emphasize the fairness and reciprocity of the original arrangement, criticizing the coworkers for expecting a free ride while unwilling to help during the OP’s holidays.

Some people highlight the coworkers’ entitlement and hypocrisy, especially regarding holidays, and enjoy the petty consequences of their actions.

Some people describe the situation as a straightforward lesson in consequences, noting the coworkers are now facing the results of their own choices.

This story shows how quickly informal goodwill can sour when reciprocity breaks down, leaving one side holding the bag during peak seasons. Do you think the Redditor’s refusal was fair given the repeated no-shows, or should they have extended grace for Christmas anyway?

How would you handle a team where holiday favors aren’t mutual? Drop your thoughts below!