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Pregnant Woman Calls Her Mom For Backup After Husband Moves His Brother’s Entire Family Into Their Home

by Layla Bui
December 3, 2025
in Social Issues

Family can lift you up, but they can also pull the rug out from under you when you least expect it. People often talk about how marriage reveals a partner’s true colors, yet the real chaos sometimes comes from the extended relatives they bring along. When stress, illness, and household pressure collide, even the strongest couples can find themselves at a breaking point.

A pregnant woman on Reddit recently shared how her husband brushed off her concerns during one of the hardest moments in her life. Things spiraled fast when unexpected house guests, a messy living space, and nonstop tension pushed her to seek support somewhere else.

She turned to her mom in desperation, and the fallout created a situation no one in the house saw coming. Scroll down to see how this turned into a family standoff.

A pregnant woman calls her mom for help after her husband lets his brother’s family take over their home

Pregnant Woman Calls Her Mom For Backup After Husband Moves His Brother’s Entire Family Into Their Home
not the actual photo

'AITA for calling my mom when my husband refused to listen to me?'

I (26f) recently moved into my first home. I am also 4 months pregnant with our first baby.

The pregnancy has been very hard. I have horrible morning sickness.

It reached a really bad point where I passed out hit my head and my Dr admitted me to the hospital for a week.

When I got home my husband allowed his brothers family to move into 2 of our 3 bedrooms. (They were evicted i dont know why).

One room was My office was tossed into our room papers every where.

The house was a complete wreck. Trash, dirty clothes, used diapers.

I started to cry. It was like a light flipped my husband was no longer the same. My husband told me it "wasn't that bad".

My reply was "fine then you should have the house cleaned up before I wake up." Completely exhausted

I fell asleep for 4 hrs. I woke up and went to get a drink of water. I couldn't every glass we own is scattered around the house.

They didn't clean a single thing. I passive aggressively started to pick up the dirty dishes and washed them.

The following morning. I was trying my best to work when their kids were crying non stop.

Banging on the walls so on. Their mom was in her room for hours ignoring them.

When my husband came home. He was upset with me over how I didn't make his brother's wife feel welcome in our home.

By helping with their kids when she was tired.

Then continued to complain how nothing was done while he was at work all day in the house. Yep the same one he didn't clean.

That lead to a fight where I told him. "I am too sick to have company and they need to leave".

To which he replied they are his family and he won't kick them out. I started to cry again.

I was beyond frustrated, exhausted, I physically couldnt do it anymore.

I called my mom asking if I could come stay with her. Telling her the whole story infront of my husband.

Who at this point was completely shocked, Angry, also I could tell he wasnt sure what to do.

My mom came with my brother's (I have 3 older brothers). My mom super angry told my husband. "Since your family can stay so can we."

My mom quickly took charge. I was sent to bed. My brother's started cleaning complaining loudly at how disgusting my BIL family is.

Along with what a horrible husband my husband is for putting me through this while I am sick.

I got a text message from my MIL for calling me an A for not helping my husband clean up the house

and putting my BIL in a uncomfortable position by having my mom boss him around.

Edited to add update, when my MIL showed up she was super angry outside.

I could hear shouting but couldn't understand what was said. Once inside she was shocked.

My house looked really bad. My BIL lied to her about what happened. My MIL quickly started to help my mom in the bossing mode.

My house is not just cleaned but deep cleaned.

My BIL and his kids are now staying with MIL. She didn't know about the eviction.

My in-laws helped them financially a couple of months ago. My MIL was not happy about it.

SIL refused to come out of the bedroom. She would scream through the door but that was about it until her family came to pick her up.

Last little bit. I did talk to my husband. He seemed very remorseful. I asked for some space he is staying at a hotel.

He asked to come by and talk to me tonight. My mom and dad are here. Both mom's felt like I should have someone here since I am sick.

Both moms have set up a meal plan. Where they trade off who will bring in dinner. It was my MIL idea.

Thank you for all your advice. I truly appreciate it. Talk with husband: summed up since it lasted 4 hrs. it was a hard talk. He is remorseful.

Bil was only supposed to stay for a couple of nights. Then leave originally he thought they would be gone before I got home.

He said he is tired and emotionally upset himself. When I originally passed out.

My husband left to help a friend move. He came home and found me. He said he has no idea how long I was on the floor hurt.

He was originally scared I had died. Since then he has had nightmares. On top of dealing with his family drama.

He admitted to dumping his frustration onto me. When it's not my fault. He begged me for another chance.

The next steps. We are still separated. He plans on staying at my brother house in his casita.

We are going to go to marriage counseling and Individual counseling.

He asked if he could come when the home health nurse comes each night and to my Dr's appointments. I agreed to that.

Update on BIL: his wife admitted to having an affair. She told him she got married too soon and doesn't want the responsibilities of being a mom anymore.

I am not sure what will happen with him and his kids but, I am shocked that she feels this way especially with her kids.

Moments of overwhelming stress often expose the emotional cracks hidden beneath a relationship’s surface. In this story, both OP and her husband were pushed beyond their limits, one battling physical illness and the loss of control at home, the other drowning in fear, guilt, and unprocessed family pressure.

Their reactions clashed not because either wished harm, but because both were struggling without the emotional tools needed to cope.

Psychologically, OP’s response stems from a fundamental need for safety. Returning from the hospital to chaos, noise, and disregard wasn’t just inconvenient; it was destabilizing.

According to the American Psychological Association, situations that disrupt a person’s sense of safety or autonomy can activate acute stress responses, especially during vulnerable periods like pregnancy.

Her crying, frustration, and decision to call her mother weren’t vindictive. They were protective actions triggered by a nervous system already overwhelmed by illness, pregnancy, and environmental disorder. When someone’s home stops feeling like a refuge, the instinct is to reach for the safest person available, which in OP’s case was her mother.

Her husband’s behavior, while undeniably harmful, also reflected emotional overload. After discovering OP unconscious weeks earlier, he carried fear and guilt he never addressed. Research published in Psychology Today explains that unprocessed fear often turns into irritability, defensiveness, or displacement toward loved ones.

He wasn’t equipped to handle his brother’s crisis, his wife’s medical needs, and his internal panic simultaneously. Allowing his brother’s family to move in was less about choosing them over OP and more about avoiding conflict and numbing the pressure piling on from every direction.

To understand this dynamic more deeply, Dr. Sue Johnson, a renowned clinical psychologist and creator of Emotionally Focused Therapy, offers a relevant insight. In her book Hold Me Tight, she notes: “When a partner shuts down or becomes reactive, it is almost always a protest of disconnection, not a loss of love.”

This perspective mirrors what happened here. OP protested the emotional abandonment she felt; her husband shut down under the weight of fear and misplaced responsibility.

Their choice to pursue counseling shows recognition that relationships can survive rupture when accountability and healing replace denial. What remains now is whether both partners can rebuild trust and emotional safety step by step.

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

This group stresses that OP’s husband mistreated her during a vulnerable time and created an unsafe home environment

TerrifiedSquid − Wait. . your MIL called. . to fuss at you for INVOLVING YOUR MOTHER? !?! There's this pot kettle thing. NTA 1000%.

But house guests in a shared home require TWO yesses and only one no. Both of you agree or it shouldn't happen.

Your husband has treated you abominably. I'm not sure I could deal with that honestly. Can you go stay w your mom?

mdthomas − I mean this in the nicest way possible: please start prepping for divorce.

Your husband moved in people to the home without consulting with you first.

He is prioritizing their needs over the needs of his wife and unborn child. NTA

shadow-foxe − NTA- so while you are in hospital, your husband without even asking you moves in his brothers family.

WOW. His family, he cleans. I'd be making him attend some therapy sessions because he needs a huge wake up call.

redheadjd − I want your mom to adopt me. I'll be a cool stepsis, I SWEAR! Your mom sounds like an awesome problem solver.

NTA. Your husband tho now. Talk about kicking someone when they're down.

Damn she's sick, she's pregnant with my baby, she just got out of the hospital - this seems like a good time to have rude, boorish houseguests

for her to cook for and clean up after. Seriously, WTF?

This was his time to show you that he's got your back, he's your support system. What does he do? Exactly the opposite of that.

He increases your workload and decreases your comfort.

That guy, if he doesn't do a major apology and change of behavior, you'll be a lot better off without him.

Do you really want to sign on for a whole family of babies to feed and clean up after? I think just the one baby will be plenty.

Silaquix − NTA, do you have hyperemesis? I had that and at first my husband and doctor didn't take it seriously

until I was vomiting to the point of passing out on the bathroom floor and I lost 20lbs in the first trimester.

Your husband is a huge AH and he's not treating you well or considering your safety and the safety of his child.

This is one of those defining moments where he either needs to get his head out of his backside

and act right or you need to leave because it will only get worse.

This is how he's treating you when you're sick before the baby even gets here.

How will he treat you when you're recovering from labor and need help taking care of a newborn?

Is this really the environment you want your child to grow up in?

These commenters note that the in-laws prioritized themselves and dismissed OP’s pregnancy and health needs

a-mullins214 − NTA. Once you heard him say sorry to your mom did you tell anyone what your MIL texted you?

I would out her so fast to your mom and she if she apologizes.

Chemical_Inspection7 − Obligatory NTA. Also just cause at this point in the saga, I have to ask,

where is your husband in all of this at this point? Kinda hoping mil has also stomped down hard on his behaviors.

Lets-B-Lets-B-Jolly − NTA- also, since BIL and his family are living with you rent-free,

the least they should do while you are pregnant and Ill is make your life easier, not harder.

They should be cooking meals and cleaning so you can rest.

OP, have you been diagnosed with hyperemesis gravidarium? If not, get your OB to do so if possible.

You will need care for a high risk pregnancy. Edit: corrected misspellings ;P

SavageSvage − Hmmm. I'm Latino. This sounds like a Latin family dynamic thing going on here. Am I right in assuming this? But also, NTA

mdktun − NTA, I'm usually not a fan of bringing family members into spouse arguments. But he really didn't give you any choice.

Your husband is an AH, so are his siblings for not being good guests.

I would imagine if someone pregnant hosts me after being evicted I would do anything to make that person comfortable.

From what I read: NTA But INFO: Who owns the house? It's so odd that your husband brought his family without asking you.

throwawaitay07 − He was upset with me over how I didn't make his brother's wife feel welcome in our home.

Also doesn't make you feel welcome in your own home NTA.

Your M. I. L. took your husband's side just out of nepotism, if I had to guess. Also, they can't take what they dish out.

This group praises OP’s mother for stepping up when OP’s husband failed to, calling her involvement necessary and protective

TalkingCapibara − Please update us, I want to know more! How did your husbands family react to the aggressive cleaning?

Were they at least embarrased? Did they stay or magically find another place to live? I'm so invested!

DJ_Too_Supreme − NTA. I am also 4 months pregnant with our first baby.

It seems like your husband forgot about this little fact.

Your husband has been making decisions without even talking to you about it (ya know since it's your house too).

He was upset with me over how I didn’t make his brother's wife feel welcome in our home.

By helping with their kids when she is tired Um. ..your husband knows you’re 4 months pregnant with his kid right? Right???

"Since your family can stay so can we." My mom quickly took charge. Mom and brothers of the year!

Glad your mom and your brothers had your back because clearly your husband is against you in this situation.

I got a text message from my MIL for calling me an A for not helping my husband clean up the house

and putting my BIL in an uncomfortable situation by having my mom boss him around OMFG,

is everyone in your husband's family this dense or forgetful? YOU ARE PREGNANT.

All of this stress and strain could cause you to (god forbid) lose your child. Your husband put your BIL in this situation

and YOUR husband put YOU in this uncomfortable situation. Bro, seems like your husband and his family are seriously inconsiderate.

Also, I find it hilarious that your MIL texted you to scold you for getting your mom involved when she, herself, had gotten involved OP,

your husband and his family are walking red flags. Either try couples therapy or reconsider this marriage

EDIT: So it has come to my attention that OP's BIL lied.

Didn’t even tell MIL that he and his family got evicted, that the house was a mess, and the state BIL put the house in.

Sooo, yeah I can’t be too upset with the MIL IF she is taking OP's side now

What do you think? Was the call to her mom a fair line in the sand, or should the husband have been confronted earlier? And how would you navigate partner loyalty versus family chaos? Share your thoughts below!

Layla Bui

Layla Bui

Hi, I’m Layla Bui. I’m a lifestyle and culture writer for Daily Highlight. Living in Los Angeles gives me endless energy and stories to share. I believe words have the power to question the world around us. Through my writing, I explore themes of wellness, belonging, and social pressure, the quiet struggles that shape so many of our lives.

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