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Teen’s Months Of Writing Wiped Out, Husband Refuses To Mediate; Now He’s The Villain

by Layla Bui
December 28, 2025
in Social Issues

There are moments in family life when you just want to escape and sometimes, that might be the only sane choice. But staying silent doesn’t always shield you from the fallout.

That’s what happened to a Redditor recently, when he witnessed his wife deleting his daughter’s months-long writing project. Between accusations, tears, and anger from multiple sides, he opted not to intervene but now, everyone is blaming him.

Read on to see how this digital-age parenting disaster unfolded and what advice the Reddit community offered.

A father watches helplessly as his wife deletes his daughter’s months-long novel, sparking chaos

Teen’s Months Of Writing Wiped Out, Husband Refuses To Mediate; Now He’s The Villain
not the actual photo

AITA for not doing anything after discovering that my wife deleted my daughter's novel?

I have been married to my wife Hannah (36) for 2 years,

She and my daughter, Morgan (16) don't have a daughter-mother relationship.

To be completely transparent here. They both fight often and just don't get along.

Morgan used to spend most of her time at her mom's but now is staying with us for school.

I remember Hannah telling me about a novel Morgan has been writing on her laptop.

She admitted to sneaking and looking at it without Morgan's knowledge but she praised her writing style

and story telling so I thought that was a positive thing.

Yesterday, I got back home and found Morgan and her mom yelling at Hannah.

I asked what was happening and Morgon told me that Hannah had deleted her novel.

Hannah said that Morgon created a character in the novel using her description and name and making her the villain.

Not only that but she wrote bad words about her, Morgon argued that it was just a character

and that Hannah had no business snooping on her laptop to begin with.

Hannah broke down crying after my ex-wife threatened her.

I just watched the 3 of them fight and did nothing nor said a single word.

I stepped out for a minute to get fresh air and moments later,

Hannah unloaded on me about how I should've defended her in the argument instead of acting so cowardly.

Morgan and her mom also said that I should've done something

when Hannah decided to snoop and delete Morgan's months' worth of work.

It just became too much with the 3 of them berating me and yelling in my face.

Morgan went home with her mom and she was crying and refused to speak to me

and Hannah checked into a hotel also refusing to speak to me.

The texts from both sides kept coming in both telling me I should've done something and should've took their side in the argument.

I just had to stay out of this one, I was on my feet the entire week working,

Both mental and physical health are down the drain and I'm tired of them fighting all the time then blaming me for my actions/or lack of.

Both are expecting me to get involved and do something to fix this but I haven't done anything yet.

Am I the a__hole for not getting involved?

Almost everyone has felt torn between loyalty and exhaustion, the emotional weight of other people’s pain pressing down while your own well runs dry. In this story, the father wasn’t just deciding whether to intervene.

He was balancing empathy for his daughter’s creative expression and loyalty to his wife in the midst of a long‑standing pattern of conflict that had taxed his mental and physical strength.

Both his wife and daughter wanted him to take a side, but in that moment, he opted for detachment because he was emotionally depleted and knew that anything he said might inflame an already volatile situation.

At the core of this conflict are unmet emotional needs and communication breakdowns that have likely been building for months. His daughter lost hours of meaningful work, something deeply personal and impactful, especially for a teenager and understandably feels violated and hurt.

His wife felt personally attacked by how she was portrayed in that creative work and reacted by deleting it. Neither perspective is simple, and each carries its own emotional truth.

The father’s silence was not apathy; it was a sign of overwhelm, a common human response when someone has been historically pulled in multiple directions, with little room to recover or reflect.

Experts on family dynamics emphasize the importance of understanding both the content and the emotional tone of conflicts.

Psychologist Jeffrey Bernstein, Ph.D., writing for Psychology Today, explains that many family tensions stem from unresolved issues, misunderstandings, and competing expectations, and that defusing them first requires calm, empathetic listening rather than impulsive reactions.

He highlights that staying calm and seeking understanding can prevent escalation and create opportunities for healthier dialogue later.

This insight helps illuminate why the father’s choice to step back, however misunderstood by both his wife and daughter, was rooted in emotional regulation rather than neglect. When caregivers are overwhelmed, immediate intervention can sometimes intensify conflict rather than resolve it.

Instead, creating space to breathe, reflect, and approach later with empathy and structure can pave the way for more constructive engagement.

For readers navigating similar family tensions, a few grounded ideas may help: set clear boundaries, communicate expectations calmly, and when conflict feels too intense, consider third‑party support such as family therapy or mediation.

These approaches don’t ignore the hurt; they create a framework for it to be heard rather than exploded. True resolution rarely happens in the heat of the moment, but through thoughtful reflection, mutual respect, and, ultimately, shared willingness to repair what’s been damaged.

Here’s the feedback from the Reddit community:

These Redditors agreed that the OP failed to defend his daughter against Hannah’s invasive, destructive actions

AGuyAndHisCat − YTA Hanna should pay for the recovery services to get the novel back

(this will run $1500-$3000 and wont guarantee that it is successful).

There is no question who TA is here and its both you and hannah.

The laptop should be powered off and not used until it is sent in for recovery to give it the bast chance of succeeding.

It just became too much with the 3 of them berating me and yelling in my face.

Well you arent going to have a great time here either.

maddiemandie − YTA- defend your daughter. Awww, your wife was the villain in her story?

My wife would have never known had she minded her own business.

NorthernLitUp − YTA. Your daughter needed you and you completely bailed on her. Take the computer to a professional.

It's possible they can recover the writing. Also, anyone who would treat my daughter like that would be out of my life in a hurry.

[Reddit User] − BRUH. You get one shot to not f__k up a relationship with your daughter.

That ship is sailing already and it's leaky.

Are you really so dense that you can't see that the way your daughter sees your gf is way more important than the way you do?

Maybe take a long look at what you've been blind to.

If you had your priorities in the right place you would have told your gf

she wasn't ever in the right to snoop on your daughter's laptop.

psychoticsystems − YTA - defend your daughter, she has every right to express her creativity,

and your girlfriend should stay out of your daughters property.

ParsimoniousSalad − YTA and what Hannah did was unforgivable.

Your poor daughter should not have to suffer for your wife's insecurity. And your first responsibility is to protect your child.

You should have said something the very first time Hannah admitted to snooping and maybe this wouldn't have happened.

crockofpot − YTA. Your wife destroyed hours of work, effort and emotion your daughter had invested in her story.

It is emotionally abusive that she destroyed it. Why don't you feel anything when your wife abuses your child?

These commenters highlighted that the daughter’s writing was personal and that Hannah’s interference was abusive and inappropriate

thirdtryisthecharm − YTA. As is Hannah. Your daughter was writing fiction, and probably processing some stuff with that writing.

Hannah snooped, then deleted her work. Work which was in no way public or created to hurt Hannah.

You are TA for not realizing how profoundly Hannah fucked up here and how inappropriate her behavior was.

NotSoAverage_sister − YTA Write what you know. That's people are encouraged to write about.

Sometimes one character is a mix of different people in the author's life. Sometimes it's a complete fabrication.

Did you ever consider that maybe this novel could be your daughter's way of working through her feelings?

Even if it was a complete vilification of your wife, this is a novel.

It may not get published. It may end up being a bestseller.

Chances are, it would have stayed on her computer, basically a digital version of a diary. Your wife did a terrible thing.

Multiple terrible things:

1. She snooped on your daughter's computer.

She's not the mother, and even if she were, I would have issues with that.

2. She turned a creation of your daughter's imagination into an argument about herself.

3. She deleted months' worth of work because she didn't like how one character was written. Your wife needs to apologize.

YOU need to apologize. Because you should absolutely have done something.

You should have stood up for your daughter's right to privacy and the freedom to write a book. YTA

[Reddit User] − YTA - and so is your new wife Hanna what’s she did was abusive and invasive,

and if I was your daughter, this would be a defining moment in my relationship w you.

Hanna the bed but what you did was worse you just left.

What you should have done was tell Hannah to grow up and stop bullying a child

and to apologize to you daughter for overstepping boundaries.

Edit to include: you were WORSE then An a__hole you failed as a parent and you need to get ride of Hannah.

That woman is garbage for doing this,

the fact that she thought it was appropriate indicates she often emotionally abused your child.

This set focused on the OP’s parental failure and the long-term harm to his relationship with his daughter

microbe628 − YTA for not defending your daughter when your wife destroyed her creative property.

And automatic YTA for marrying a woman who seems to be verbally abusive to your kid.

Your #1 concern when marrying this woman should have been her relationship to your daughter. ULTIMATE dad fail.

coldcoldiq − You allowed your a__hole wife to invade your daughter's privacy on multiple occasions, and thought it a "positive thing."

You learned that your a__hole wife deleted your daughter's intellectual property that took a lot of time

and hard work and that didn't make you livid.

You want to play Switzerland in a situation where your a__hole wife unambiguously victimized your daughter.

Gee, hmm, I don't know, YTA?

[Reddit User] − YTA and so is Hannah. It’s very clear who is in the wrong here. You should have stood up for your daughter.

In the end, the father’s silence became the focal point of the family’s unraveling. Months of creativity vanished, emotions ran high, and trust cracked between parent and child. The story raises the tricky question: Is neutrality ever truly neutral when a teen’s personal space and expression are violated?

Do you think the father should have immediately defended his daughter, or was stepping back the safer choice? How would you navigate a household where loyalty and love are being pulled in three directions? Share your hot takes below!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) 0/0 votes | 0%
No One Is The AH Here (NAH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) 0/0 votes | 0%
Need More INFO (INFO) 0/0 votes | 0%

Layla Bui

Layla Bui

Hi, I’m Layla Bui. I’m a lifestyle and culture writer for Daily Highlight. Living in Los Angeles gives me endless energy and stories to share. I believe words have the power to question the world around us. Through my writing, I explore themes of wellness, belonging, and social pressure, the quiet struggles that shape so many of our lives.

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